Lots of women are leaving their natural roles as home keepers to join the male folks outside to hunt for means of livelihood. During the early years of human existence, it was entirely the role of men to be the bread winners of the family. Things were not bad. Everything moved fine. But at this stage where women are competing for space in employment market, there is a problem that everyone seems to overlook. Here is the maths which is applicable exclusively in a place like Naija

Lets say for instance we have 200 people and 100 top job positions, 100 people are male while the other 100 are female. 50 males are employed while the other 50 males are unemployed. Now, due to ladies massively leaving the kitchen, 50 women got employed while the other 50 ladies are unenployed. Since ladies CAN NOT marry an unemployed man, it means that only the 50 employed men are available for ladies. All 100 ladies both employed and unemployed would have to struggle to marry one of 50 employed men. The result is that at the end, some ladies would be left hanging since they would NEVER marry any of the "lazy" men that ladies who left the kitchen displaced out of work.
Now lets look at a situation where ladies are not competing with men for employment positions and are maintained their roles as home and child caretakers plus managing a little biz or small job of their own, it means all the 100 men will be employed and will be availble to marry off all the 100 ladies cos men dont discriminate rich or poor ladies. No one is left hanging. Everyone is happy.
Am not against ladies competing and displacing men in the employment market, but are ladies prepared to marry unemployed guys? If their answer is YES then no problem. But if their answer is NO then they should better go back to the their natural roles at home oo.

sexkillz: What a load of crap!

I hate it when someone is criticizing without pointing out the loop holes. Mr, why not lay down your counter points rather than saying that nonesense above.
Am glad you resisted the temptation to delete this thread cos I would have made it my mission to hunt you down on Nairaland.

If out of all d 50 employed ladies u choose one to marry let's say it happens to be okonjo iweala, wont u shut up an do d home cores ya self:
d moment u start finkin smart as per adam was to be alone in dis world wont u be doin evryfin plus d homme cores tu, she is a helper dosen't d shudn't work, wen house helps are around lookin for works to do: or wont u one day wish ya wife to b influencial an powaful as mitchell obama:

Sanboy25:
@OP
Yes but if you have a stay-at-home wife, I truly believe that a day,
during a 'fight' (=lively argument), you'll call her 'lazy'...
And work is also a way for the husband to have a woman under his control,
I have nothing against that, but if the man starts beating or ill-treating the woman,
she wouldn't have no way to 'escape' as she is not financially independent...
A day she'll die under the blows of her husband...
I rather a woman to have a part-time job than being jobless, and that, for her own sake.

First why would I call a woman lazy if I understand the reason and situation at hand?
Secondly I made it clear that ladies can manage a biz of the their own or a little job. I didnt say they should completely sit at home.
In my opinion, only widows should take up full time huge employments.

Blackteeth:
First why would I call a woman lazy if I understand the reason and situation at hand?
Secondly I made it clear that ladies can manage a biz of the their own or a little job. I didnt say they should completely sit at home.
In my opinion, only widows should take up full time huge employments.

wat differentiates u from the stone age men that hunted while their wives cooked?? warped

vallycan: If out of all d 50 employed ladies u choose one to marry let's say it happens to be okonjo iweala, wont u shut up an do d home cores ya self:
d moment u start finkin smart as per adam was to be alone in dis world wont u be doin evryfin plus d homme cores tu, she is a helper dosen't d shudn't work, wen house helps are around lookin for works to do: or wont u one day wish ya wife to b influencial an powaful as mitchell obama:

We have seen countless cases where highly employed ladies would never get married to an unempoyed man. In fact they cant get married to an ordinary employed man. That man would have to be a Dangote who has more money than her before she considers marrying him.
A wealthy man will lift up a lady from poverty, but a wealthy lady would never do such to man. Why should it be one sided?

gree-die:


wat differentiates u from the stone age men that hunted while their wives cooked?? warped

Anyone who is selfish and thinks of himself/herself and his/her partner alone will not agree with me. Only those who think about the society as a whole will undertsand my post.
I dont blame the ladies, men are becoming weaker to put ladies in the proper place they belong.

OP I cannot agree more with your post. It's every REAL man's dying wish to have things normal again.

Usually i do not like to use this to make a valid point, but i believe women should have the equal chance to work just as men do, and my mom is a good example of that, she could have been a stay at home mom, but you see after the departure of her husband, and relatives taking all the properties, the only saving grace was the fact that she was a working class woman who managed to raise her kids from scratch, how often do you read in the newspaper about a slain police-man and the wife complains about her not knowing how to feed the family. i'd agree with this post if we were in the 80's when times were easier but in today's world that's just plain silly, and also your post reeks of Sexism.

Blackteeth:
Anyone who is selfish and thinks of himself/herself and his/her partner alone will not agree with me. Only those who think about the society as a whole will undertsand my post.
I dont blame the ladies, men are becoming weaker to put ladies in the proper place they belong.

I think it all balls down to personal choice, when you marry you can have your wife perform at her ordained role, and i guess the rest too can exercise that option, not like you are mandating everyone to follow your way now or are you ?

If my mother never worked, I would not have gotten to the level I am today. Can men be trusted? They derail every second and if care is not taken, children surfer, if mothers are not employed. If my wife refused to work, I shall kick her arse myself. Who wants a sit at home wife who later becomes big for nothing mami water?

I biliv d OP neva talked abt a full house wife. but as far as i am concerned, i also biliv a lady shldnt obsess herself with a career dt won't allow her time with her children and husband.

I help my gf out a lot so i dnt even biliv in ouse help except those who will come and go for d day to ease her chores. Like cleaners to mop d floors, and gardeners. No one else.

It will be a thing of joy for me to see ma children bond wit ma wife. See her bathe them, help with d homeworks and run her to wen daddy is angry.

So, it is like expecting her to have a modest job and not d one dt see her go in d morning and lete at night.

Av seen me a woman who's hubby works far away, and the lady only sees her children wen the maid wakes them to bath at dawn, and wen they are asleep at night. They are rich all right, but the children are in d care of a teacher by day, and d maid for d rest. Whatever morals ds children will learn will actually not be from d father dt comes every weekend, of d mother dt only kiss them good morning.

We need our brains, money is not everthing!

Blackteeth:
Anyone who is selfish and thinks of himself/herself and his/her partner alone will not agree with me. Only those who think about the society as a whole will undertsand my post.
I dont blame the ladies, men are becoming weaker to put ladies in the proper place they belong.

I don't know which one is the bigger load of crap between this and the first post.

Is good for a mother to look over her home and build it the way she dims fit but whilte colar jobs cannot give a woman the full chance to do that. She will always be tired whenever she comes back from work thereby relying on the help of her housemaid. This most times affects the sex life of couples. If she is self employed, that will not be the case because she will be visiting her shop anytime she finishes her home duty and can close anytime she wishes. She will not be mandated to be punctual in her business unlike a working class mum, or rather she goes there anytime she has strength because family building is not an easy task. But for a woman to be self employed and still manage her home very very well just like the olden days mummies, her husband will be financially capable in the sense that he will set up the business for her and shouldn't expect big contribution from her except if the business is moving so well although he shouldn't place it as an order, the wife should be able to do the contribution with an open heart and free will so that she will be faithful with it. Also the man must make sure that he caters wholely for the family welfare while she, the wife, helps in a way her business permits her . If the man frowns at his main duty expecting the woman to carry half of the house financial upkeep from her small business, then there will be war. The woman might start doing funny and dirty things while the man might start neglecting the family, then the marriage will become a nightmare. That is why is good to have understanding and discuss about all these things before wedding takes place so that everybody will be guided accordingly.

Princess zoe: Is good for a mother to look over her home and build it the way she dims fit but whilte colar jobs cannot give a woman the full chance to do that. She will always be tired whenever she comes back from work thereby relying on the help of her housemaid. This most times affects the sex life of couples. If she is self employed, that will not be the case because she will be visiting her shop anytime she finishes her home duty and can close anytime she wishes. She will not be mandated to be punctual in her business unlike a working class mum, or rather she goes there anytime she has strength because family building is not an easy task. But for a woman to be self employed and still manage her home very very well just like the olden days mummies, her husband will be financially capable in the sense that [b]he will set up the business for her [/b]and shouldn't expect big contribution from her except if the business is moving so well although he shouldn't place it as an order, the wife should be able to do the contribution with an open heart and free will so that she will be faithful with it. Also the man must make sure that he caters wholely for the family welfare while she, the wife, helps in a way her business permits her . If the man frowns at his main duty expecting the woman to carry half of the house financial upkeep from her small business, then there will be war. The woman might start doing funny and dirty things while the man might start neglecting the family, then the marriage will become a nightmare. That is why is good to have understanding and discuss about all these things before wedding takes place so that everybody will be guided accordingly.

My dear this is not Utopia, people are barely able to make ends meet with both couples employed. i don't believe in that concept that because someone is working the children will be neglected and might end up becoming worse, i've seen worse children from homes with Stay at Home moms, i grew up in a home,where my mom had to be in business meetings and trips, and we all turned out pretty well. The economy is really harsh o, everybody has to pull in resources.

pc guru: Usually i do not like to use this to make a valid point, but i believe women should have the equal chance to work just as men do, and my mom is a good example of that, she could have been a stay at home mom, but you see after the departure of her husband, and relatives taking all the properties, the only saving grace was the fact that she was a working class woman who managed to raise her kids from scratch, how often do you read in the newspaper about a slain police-man and the wife complains about her not knowing how to feed the family. i'd agree with this post if we were in the 80's when times were easier but in today's world that's just plain silly, and also your post reeks of Sexism.

Well, I think I made it clear in one of my posts above that only widows should be allowed ful time jobs. That will address the point raised above.

tpacalipse: If my mother never worked, I would not have gotten to the level I am today. Can men be trusted? They derail every second and if care is not taken, children surfer, if mothers are not employed. If my wife refused to work, I shall kick her arse myself. Who wants a sit at home wife who later becomes big for nothing mami water?

The main issue about my post is not just about working class women, the main point I was making is that A WORKING CLASS LADY IN NIGERIA WILL NEVER MARRY AN UNEMPLOYED MAN. Since they cant marry an unemployed man why cant they stay off the office and leave the positions for men so that these men can take up these positions and be in a position to get married to these ladies. Do you get what am saying?

pc guru:

My dear this is not Utopia, people are barely able to make ends meet with both couples employed. i don't believe in that concept that because someone is working the children will be neglected and might end up becoming worse, i've seen worse children from homes with Stay at Home moms, i grew up in a home,where my mom had to be in business meetings and trips, and we all turned out pretty well. The economy is really harsh o, everybody has to pull in resources.

The main issue of my thread is that I am against single unmarried ladies taken up top job positions. These NIGERIAN ladies will never get married to an unemployed man. If more of these women increase then it means we would have a high number of unmarried persons cos these ladies have displaced a good number of men who would have occupied these positions and be in a position to get married to the already saturated array of unmarried women. A widow is an execptional case. They should be given very good paying jobs.
Thats my main point.

It is apparent some male chatters are dealing with father abandonment and issues.

Blackteeth:
I hate it when someone is criticizing without pointing out the loop holes. Mr, why not lay down your counter points rather than saying that nonesense above.
Am glad you resisted the temptation to delete this thread cos I would have made it my mission to hunt you down on Nairaland.

If that crap up there was written by someone else this king of Nairaland would hand out ban as if it's a Christmas gift.....smh

Blackteeth:
The main issue of my thread is that I am against single unmarried ladies taken up top job positions. These NIGERIAN ladies will never get married to an unemployed man. If more of these women increase then it means we would have a high number of unmarried persons cos these ladies have displaced a good number of men who would have occupied these positions and be in a position to get married to the already saturated array of unmarried women. A widow is an execptional case. They should be given very good paying jobs.
Thats my main point.

Come on man, i know you mean that the Household should be treated, but seriously why should a lady stay unemployed just because she wants to get married that's so wrong on many levels, yes i know it will be hard getting married to an unemployed man but that's limiting yourself, sorry man i was brought up with the achiever mentality. I would never sacrifice my goals just because i can be comfortable with someone, unless its family. yeah and for the widow part, no one ever has the intention of being one, till it happens if a lady hasn't worked before and it happened at a far later stage, then it gonna be a problem too.

pc guru:
Come on man, i know you mean that the Household should be treated, but seriously why should a lady stay unemployed just because she wants to get married that's so wrong on many levels, yes i know it will be hard getting married to an unemployed man but that's limiting yourself, sorry man i was brought up with the achiever mentality. I would never sacrifice my goals just because i can be comfortable with someone, unless its family. yeah and for the widow part, no one ever has the intention of being one, till it happens if a lady hasn't worked before and it happened at a far later stage, then it gonna be a problem too.

Am not saying ladies should be totaly unemployed. There are petty things they can do such as jobs that are exclusively for ladies or start a biz or develop some skills of their own. My opinion is that single unmarried ladies should not be placed in high postions in the employment scene where a man should better be to balance things in the society.
In response to to your last part about widows being fit to work eventually, anyone who has not worked before can still work comfortably. Its just a question of making proper arrangements.

Blackteeth:
Am not saying ladies should be totaly unemployed. There are petty things they can do such as jobs that are exclusively for ladies or start a biz or develop some skills of their own. My opinion is that single unmarried ladies should not be placed in high postions in the employment scene where a man should better be to balance things in the society.
In response to to your last part about widows being fit to work eventually, anyone who has not worked before can still work comfortably. Its just a question of making proper arrangements.

oh women in top positions yeah i noticed that too, oh well as for that i can't say much, cuz i actually agree with you, such position hardly gives them time to get married.

pc guru: oh women in top positions yeah i noticed that too, oh well as for that i can't say much, cuz i actually agree with you, such position hardly gives them time to get married.

Not just time. THEY CANT MARRY A POOR MAN. These category of single ladies are accumulating wealth for themselves alone which a young man in that position would have used to lift an unemployed lady out of poverty, start a family and take care of even the extended family in his village. Plus clearing the pressure off his shoulders for being a man of failure that the society would say.

poster i blv there is a reason why gender equality was introduced. Do you remember how men used treat woman coz they knew that they had no way out. nigga plzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Blackteeth:
The main issue about my post is not just about working class women, the main point I was making is that A WORKING CLASS LADY IN NIGERIA WILL NEVER MARRY AN UNEMPLOYED MAN. Since they cant marry an unemployed man why cant they stay off the office and leave the positions for men so that these men can take up these positions and be in a position to get married to these ladies. Do you get what am saying?

Yes, I get it. But to me; may be because of the way I grew up, women are equal to men. The labour market shud b an equal opportunity kind of place for everyone, both men and women. Let everybody go there and compete. If the women are better at getting the jobs, then let them. But in the case of women not willing to marry jobless men, well, I think that is subjective.

This op clearly has issues. I would suggest you move to Saudi Arabia where this is possible.

Blackteeth:
Anyone who is selfish and thinks of himself/herself and his/her partner alone will not agree with me. Only those who think about the society as a whole will undertsand my post.
I dont blame the ladies, men are becoming weaker to put ladies in the proper place they belong.

Are you really concerned about society? For the 100 vacancies you were refering to, society deserves the best minds. Just concentrate on improving yourself and be the best you can be then you would have nothing to worry about. Don't eliminate the healthy competition by deciding women should stay home and cook your meals.

It sounds as though you've been pounding the pavements with your certificates in hand for a while and have found little luck. And now you're blaming women for stiffening the competition? Brother

And as for women not marrying unemployed men, what world have u been living in? Most women who marry in their forties (or later) marry men they've picked up, brushed up and set up with a gig. So don't worry, even when we leave the kitchen, the universe is safe.

This poster: BlackTeeth raised a very important logic here which I strongly believe was an outcome of serious brainstorming and logical reasoning.

First of all, kudos @OP...it takes an intelligent and stable-minded person to see through the facts raised in your initial post. I just learnt something from this post, jeez!

In fact, this is one of the major reasons we have increased number of single ladies presently, and since the issues raised by the poster aren't going to be addressed by the all concerned parties, the number of single ladies who are working and earning good income will definitely increase with time and this will also lead to increase in the number of single mothers, female frustration, prostitution, self-anger and obviously increase in the number of children born out of wedlock with inadequate parental training, and the overall outcome

Increased crime- religious extremism (terrorist), armed robbers, kidnappers, female molesters, drug addicts, school drop outs and more rap singers without a decent or modest lifestyle.

Thank you BlackTeeth