I hope end time things have not caught up with you. well, you will get to read this ONLY if the end has not come in this our perverse generation.
BTW, is Garri still popular?
kindly forward your replies to,
adeniyiJesus@heavenlymansion.Eden

solidbroda: My Letter...
Thank God y'all eyes have opened! During my time 2013, religion thrive. And you guys know what people say when they are in trouble or any problem? They say "it is God's plan". Funny right? Most of us or people in my time now were deluded into believing a religious God. And can you even imagine the funniest thing? We have different Gods. One for Christian (Yahweh), one for muslims (Allah), Budah Gods, Indu Gods, Jehovah witness Gods etc. (I know some of you could see the stupidity in our thoughts)...
However, some of us now believed all these were sham. Gods were created by men until science also gave us more concrete proof about happenings and events.
I can see that y'all are positivists now. No more primitive men or metaphysicists amongst you. I wish I can be in your time where men are equal without religious supremacy. Now, its a battle to make people understand that God doesn't exist. Evidently, the battle has been worn in your time.

Some religion are veiled with the main or sole aim of captivating followers. Though nobody will ever be forced or coerced to join a religion, You join or become a follower because of you FREEWILL to choose. I will advice you as a perfect soulmate can, that Christianity is the way where you will find the LIGHT (Genuine Salvation and Perfect Relationship with God). Come and Taste and you will be Convinced.

From the Present Past to the Present Future. Dear Futuristic Nairalanders....i have only hijacked this space to think of what i may be writing on it for your own posterity. There are quite a few pleasant things that would come into this space as well as unpleasant one's as well. But the story ain't started yet, so just sit tight and sit back and wait to allow me take you into a time's journey of the events and happenings of my world this present millenia, things that would be invaluable in application to your own time and millenia. PS: As a nairalander during the era i existed, i think every beautiful story normally had a happy ever after ending and in this i think it would end in similar fashion because i might get to woo the OP[Spicymimi(f)] of this thread and convince her to marry me in a very rosy and beautiful ceremony to make it a very happy ending to my Utopia Nairalanders. I'll brb to conclude this letter. Hehehe....I can already see my future descendant nairalander in the yr 2999(i.e if the world doesn't come to an end before then) viewing this post. Sincerely Yours, (Saint Chukz from the past).

Futuristic I was when I wrote this shi!!

We had clowns as our Leaders
Rotten Paw-Paw like" shaped women as wives to our leaders
Unending promises from our leaders!
Stupid insurgents called "Movement for the Emancipation of the Niger Delta (MEND)"
Clueless Terrorists known as "Boko Haram"
Epileptic power supply
Hazardous looking roads.
Greedy Citizens
Poverty everywhere!

Verse 2
We had facebook
Twitter
2go
Badoo
4clique
Eskimi
Nairaland

Verse 3
We had some fellows like Seun Osewa
Mukinatu
Sexkillz
Idowuogbo
TexasDallas Cowgirl
Adaobi123
Mynd_44
Obadiah777
Maclatunji
Manmustwac
Nadia_SA
Nomski0
JOYCEOUS
God_of_music
Marthakings
Chaircover
Ishihate
Ajibam
Slyr0x
Dominique
Albacete
Valboy
Abushman
Mayapop
Blackberrydude
Shady01
Gree-die
Ogugua88
Afam4eva
CFCfan
Moonraker
Nelly ghengen
Abpatrick7
Achukwunet
Lupey
ItsModella
Fynestboi
Odunharry
Yuzedo77

Verse 4
Whenever you read this,I just want you to know a Certain Abu Michael |*Mikey*| lived during the late 90's and early 2000's and left his mark amongst every other means including this!!

Its kinda scary knowin dat we wld b no mor. its rly ashes 2 ashes n dust 2 dust

kom 2 tink of it....wil NL still be existin

Space booked.

Will be back!

I was here.

Dear future Nairalanders,

I remember with nostalgia, the days of yore. When Madam Mukina was the Turai of nairaland and Seun, her Yar'adua. I remember the e wars over tribe and religion and the attendant ban. Thank God that as your President and with your support, we in government have been able to expunge any traces of the word 'tribe' or 'religion' from our constitution and disposition. Nigeria is now a country where merit supercedes every other consideration.
I write you from my retreat in Borno, the home of peace. With the utmost gratitude to God and fellow citizens I commemorate our 5th year of signing the bilateral agreement with the United States govt on the interest-free lending to that once world-power, in this historic town. I am also happy to inform you that Nigeria shall be partnering with Niger, cameroun, Ghana, Sudan and other 'little' neighbour nations in the area of science, agriculture, healthcare and education. For what use is our reputation as the world power, if our little brothers are still groping in the wilderness of lack? I digress.
Now that Seun and his wife Mukina has left nairaland in the hands sixkellz(whose e girlfriend is my first lady), to focus on his new interest with Bill Gates and Mark ZUkerberg, may I congratulate the new manager and wish him a harvest of robust engagement and less ban.
To Hajia Berem Buhari, the 17th wife of our amiable general, I say more powers to your fingers, as you type the ten million(th) post in defence of your husband's actions and inactions on the 2015 elections and how he was betrayed by those that he trusted.
To the retiring members of the 40 man laptop crew- you have had your day. This government does not need your suppport to succeed. The same goes to the 400 APC tribal warlords. Remember, it is felony to mention the word 'tribe' on the streets or electronic or print media in Nigeria.
May I also congratulate a retired nairalander- okija juju, on his recent appointment as the spiritual director of African black science by the united Nations.
On this note, I greet all nairalanders and God bless.

SpicyMimi: I also want to add to this...

I guess by this time(2,999), most of us will either be in Heaven or Hell! I pray we make Heaven.

I wanna leave my footprints on the sands of time
Know there was something that, and something that I left behind
When I leave this world, I'll leave no regrets
Leave something to remember, so they won't forget
I was here...
I lived, I loved
I was here...
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here...
I want to say I lived each day,until I died
I know that I had something in, somebody's life
The hearts I have touched, will be the proof that I leave
That I made a difference, and this world will see
I was here...
I lived, I loved
I was here...
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know

I was here...
I was here...
I lived, I loved
I was here...
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here...
I just want them to know
That I gave my all, did my best
Brought someone to hapiness
Left this world a little better just because...
I was here...
I was here...
I lived, I loved
I was here...
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here…

baby why na....u want die ni??

dear future,

whats up how is the united states? I am sure you have become a traditional family over there.

I made the decision to leave the shithole called Nigeria and I am sure you guys would be eternally grateful for the decision I made.

Well do you still hear news from Nigeria? Some late arrivals to heaven said the chinese purchased it but had to sell it to Ghana at half price after they couldn't control the corruption.

Well I hope they are having it good. I also heard Goodlucks stash was finally found, but was stolen in transit. Well that's Naija for you.

Well we are not allowed to use heavens telescope, but once in a while I bribe a Nigerian angel to get access to it and I notice that at Night Nigeria's land is usually dark, compared to benin and niger that are always illuminated. Does that mean that the power situation is yet to be solved?

Heard the new president has launched a hundred point agenda called vision 3020. Hope it works out.

Well I have to go now today is ibb's bday and Jesus wants to celebrate it for him.

Fastforward 2999.

Dear nairalaners,
I hope you read about me with pride in your history books. I had to do the things I did yesterday for your today. Our sacrifices yesterday are your gains today. Improve on it and leave a better world for your kids.

Future Nlders,
Whats up with superman, batman and spiderman? Do you still have kings and queens? Is sleeping with animals now legal? Do you guys have sex on the streetz? How do u now have sex?
So many questions to keep asking, but to cut the story short, it would have been better you lived in my time, cause it would be easier for you to go to heaven. Believe in yourself, and primarily in God. Meanwhile, God is saying "hi". I love all of you, but remember the hearts of men is wicked, therefore trust no man.
In conclusion, vanity upon vanity all is vanity! I Know my estate in London, paris, Newyork is no more. My range rover sport 8 i cherished so much is gone, oh i miss my nike shoes! The stolen money i embezzled as a President when i won the 2027 election is also gone. I thank God i made it to heaven though.
With end time love,
imustsaymymindo.

All I ever want is for history to be fair to me cos I know my name shall survive thru time, thru the generations, passed down from generation to generation..

I'l do all in my power to make sure long after I'm gone my name still rings louder than Alexander Grahambell.

Let History put my name on the tablets of mens heart.. In the sands of time..

My First Name ; Ever
My Last Name; Greatest..

I was here! The Greatest Ever.

SpicyMimi: Dear Future Nairalanders,

How'r you? How is the weather suituation in Nigeria? Stil predictable? Never was anyway.
How is Nigeria now?
During the early 2000s', Nigeria was in a complete mess! We had terrorists like 'Boko Haram'' led by a Man called SHEKAU. They were behind the causes of so many damages in Nigeria. They burnt houses, schools, churches, and sometimes Mosques. President Johnathan was the ruling president and i think he really tried his best, cause he ws/is just a human like us, though i wont list him as one of the best Presidents.
So how is the state of the country now? Am sure Boko Haram no longer exists.

what about thr Power supply suituation? Do you enjoy 24/7 electricity now?
Electricity has always been a constant problem and issue in Nigeria, its so devastating and really frustrating, we hope things are better now...and hope darkness is no longer part of Nigeria's problems.

How are your schools like? Do you still write WAEC? And the so-called JAMB?
Your teachers are they well qualified? Or just lazying around gossipn like they used to? I hope things are better now! And i hope no one sits at home for years before getting admission into his or her school of choice.

The churches and Mosques? Do they still preach about Salvation? Or is it about wealth and things of the world?
During this time of ours, people really ve forgotten their goals in the church, it has all been diverted to the riches and wealth of this world....just few still stand on their goals.
I hope indecent clothes aint allowed in churches ? It was allowed in some churches here bt i hope it has reduced.

How is the civilisation there? In terms of good roads, clothes, phones,houses, food, tradition etc
Do you still use BlackBerry? Iphone? Android? Nokia?
These wr the trending phones then.

Do guys still were skinny jeans? Likewise the girls? Is colour riot or locking stil acceptable?
What kind of shoe is trending now? Too bad we cant get anwers to this.

Love existed partially here....som blivd in it while some didnt, how is it now? Do love still exist or has it been completely wiped off? Please if it has, revive it back cause Love is a beautiful thing.

What music is trending now? Who are the best musicians and actresses now? 2face, Psquare, Dbanj; wizkid, Tiwa savage, Asa, MayD, Davido, Banky W, Wande, Kcee, and so many of them were hot here...
And the best songs trending for now- Kcee-limpopo and Davido-Gobe....i hope you dont find these songs annoying and absurd.

How is Nollywood? Still in existence? Have they improved from love and romance movies to something more creative and sensible? Have they stopped the habbit of wearing skimpy skirts and shorts? Or is it now unimmaginable?

How is Nairaland? Has it been sold by now? Or has Seun's generations taken over? Do you find Nairaland interesting like we all do here? What about the Mods? Are they strict and nice?
We have a popular Mod here, his name...Sexkills' he is/was the most popular, strict and most hated.He fell in love twice on Nairaland with two Mods-1.Ijebabe and the 2. Ogugua..i hope they ended up together. Do you have anyone like that now?

We have another popular mod- Mukina. We dont know if Mukina is a she or a he, but frm my research she or he ws d most strict of all! S/he could ban u for life out of Nairaland, and one thing about Mukina is that, you hardly see his or her comment on threads, except for links and closing threads.

Who is the most beautiful and the most handsome? We got so many beauties nd cute guys here sure u got the best of them.

My advice: dont sell your love for sex and sex for love, sell your Love for Love.
Stay out of trouble as much as you can and most importantly give or surrender your lives to Christ as He is the only way.

Have a nice and great time in your well civilised world.

Eyahh, it must be stone cold in the deep (6 feet) where you are writing from. The next dead man arriving will update you. Keep hopes alive..

I was born. I cried. I laughed. I made mistakes. I touched lives. I met people. I cheated. I did the right thing. I live on even if one day I will be with my father in heaven. Think of me and I will be there with you.

Hy, dis is 4rm a Nlandr in 2013
How r u all? Hope u r nt at war cos embers hav been fanned even b4 my time.
How r Nigerians? Seriously confusing ppl in many respects,alway finding it a past time 2 insult ppl dat they r nt better than,although dis definition does nt apply 2 everi1,hope dat has changd? D Nigerians hia always pray 4 d country 2 be beta bt they dnt live it. Hope ur set is now acting rite?
How r d xtians,if any in ur time. Do they know Jesus 4 themselves or they still follow pastor/priest blindly? Do they know d Holy Spirit? Cos my parents set here dnt know anytin abt d Holy Spirit and God and Jesus,thats why sum of my generations r atheists. Confused set of dudes u knw. Did science find an answer 2 wat happens 2 atheists afta death? Or is there anoda earth that science has discoverd.
How r Homosexuals? Hope they hav nt legalised it,though looking at how d world is going, they may hav done dat. Mind u am nt a Homophobe nor a Homophilic person, i jst wich they cn find help. Dnt go hating them, for hatred for humans only breeds hatred and solves nting. Help them 2 d knowledge of Christ and maybe they will be able save themselves.
Finally, how r d politicians of your generation? Hope they r nt useles waste of resources lyke ours. Dnt allow any old fart 2 tel u dat u r d leaders of tomorrow, dat statement breeds poor mentality and gives u a stupid hope 4 d future. If u have anytin 2 change, do it nw.
I have 2 go. Prepare 4 d coming of Christ and try 2 make d country better nt worse.
Bye.
Rapmike.

Hi future
I was here in 2013. Do you peeps still hv virgins or babies r born disvirgined during our time it was difficult to have one. Have u gotten d standby electricity d govt promised u? Are the youths now the leaders of tomorrow cos during our time(d aged were d future leaders). Keep holding on 2 jesus,He's d only future u hv




Intentional

Well I hope niger delta has its oen Republic by now!fellow NDs Bad meat was here fighting for your rights!just want o let u know ur ancestors were brave people!fearless!courageous,the nigerians will try to intimidate u!but remember the bravery of issac Boro,ken saro wiwa,ateke tom,tom polo,Obi wali,defend ur self n territories
From the hausa/fulani jihadist,,and the awoist,God be with u in all ur struggles!BADMEAT LOVES U ALL

I didn't did this...wazn't burn by that time.
But i knows Nigerian Police weared black and black with back, side front and up pockets for easy "roger ur boys something". Is my username steall exeesting?

To the future ( 2,999 )

It's quite amazing to know that something I wrote 986 years ago is being read after im long, long gone.

If you are reading this, then I guess nairaland survived, so how many members are there now? I witnessed the inception/early days of NL, back then we were just a little over 1 million members, a time NL was plagued with issues like abysmal moderating, spammers, mentally ill people, erratic founder ( RIP to him ) and lots more. I'm assuming with AI ( artificial intelligence ) everything is much easier.

How is the global state of affairs, I know there is peace, how's science and technology, are there things like flying cars, time travel, anti-gravity crafts, unending energy sources e.t.c ? How has humans evolved? Any changes? How about religion? does it still exist? And most importantly, how's Nigeria ( if it still exists ) during my time, Nigeria was a literal hell, I hope you now live in paradise?

I'm going to end now, I know you must be getting bored of reading, please take the time to read past history, global and especially that of Nigeria, it will help you better understand and appreciate the magnitude of the times in which you live in and help you leave a better legacy for future generations to come.

Dear NLder,
I hop u are doing much better in ur generation, ours wasn't too bad, We had democracy, fair education, I Studied Medicine in oou, although, I spent almost a decade in school, No thanks to ASUU, the only language they understood was Strike.
I guess u guys can access the net for free anywhere in Nigeria right? It wasn't like dat in our own time, u need to make subscription or go u to cafe to do dat.
Nelson Mandela lived in my generation, he was a grt leader, the best so far in history of Africa.
I guess u ppl can nw afford new cars and Auto section on NL is nw dominated by dealers selling new cars, jets right? Most dealers don't even have cars to sell, they are arrand boys, some are busy advertising scrap, anyway.
Hw is online dating nw? Ppl did it in my generation, few were successful bt many failed, I used to hav 1 bt it didn't work out, she was fake, too ugly than wat I saw on her profile pix.
Bill Gate and Steve Jobs were grt inventors in my generation, dey were grt contenders too.
Lionel Messi and Christano Ronaldo were grt footballers, I doubt if u can ever hav a footballer like messi in ur time.
Do ppl Still go for special prayer in churches to get American visa? Lol!
There was a Nation called Nigeria, I love her!!!
I was here.

dear future NLers...

everything I would have asked u about then had already been asked by the Op but one thing...
we used to have a special crew back then called 'the endtime crew', do you still have them there...I am sure they would be surprised if they found out that close to a thousand years after their predictions, the world is still as kicking as ever, cos they actually believed that all the harsh happenings around us now were signs of endtime
imagine so many atrocities, man's inhumanity to has fellow man, same sex getting married, a special cult called 'the Freemason ' taking over our churches.. just to mention but a few...
I am sure by then, Nigeria would have divided..how many countries has it divided into now?...I won't be surprised if you say 774 countries..because during our time even every family wanted to form his own state...so divided we were!
one last question I would like to asked 'What are you people living on now? I am sure the oil Wells dried up long time ago...on behalf of all those who contributed either knowingly or unknowingly towards shortchanging your generation, I tender our unreserved apology..

Take care and be good!
Kelklein
Sept., 2013

The below is strictly a letter to Moi, I'm writing no future letter to no one.

Hello punk,

Howdy. How's Angie, I trust she's still as fine as ever. I hope I haven't dump her àrse for some new hot chick? But, then if she had gotten fat, she prob'bly left me with no choice, after all, boys will be boys!

How's the climate our there? Hope, the Sun is still visible on the horizon, and the sky still blue? The cars are airborned, I suppose? Good! I wouldn't have it any other way!

I hope I'm stinking rich by now, cuz even before I started penning this piece, I'm already an over-achiever.

I don't have much to say except to tell me to remain focus and steadfast. Universe is my limit, and the world my slave.

Your's truly(the younger version of me but still the irrepressible), Ray.

#Peace.

Dear Future Me,

I know you will be happy and always pray for me by now, for I have strived really hard for you to be counted as a champion among the sons of men, although I am still trying to accomplish it ani know it'll be so.

The only major sadness and regrets I have is that I came to a country like nigeria where things never work out due to our mentality. It's a long story and I don't want to go there for now.

Pls strive more harder to make sure that you carry the family's name to a much more prestigious level.

Ain't got much to say.

P.S I love you so much.

SpicyMimi:

We have another popular mod- Mukina. We dont know if Mukina is a she or a he, but frm my research she or he ws d most strict of all! S/he could ban u for life out of Nairaland, and one thing about Mukina is that, you hardly see his or her comment on threads, except for links and closing threads

LOL. Dis mukina2 girl hav a very serious vibration. She no dy take eye c END TIME TINS wtout banning u. #AM TOKING 4RM XPERIENCE#


P.S i hope i won't gt ban fr sayin END TIME TINZ.bkos i ws jst sayn END TIME TINS bkos dts y she baned me. And oh! Dear future. I hope d world is not at an end tym yet.

Hello y'll!
How are you guys? I hope everything is fine and cool!
How is the world now, is it still spherical? Or is it now flat?? How are you guys managing with the hot rays from the sun?? Is snow now falling in Nigeria?? Is the president a member of illuminati?? Wait 1st, have you guys heard of illuminati?? It was the biggest cult of our time!

Do people now live on the moon or outside earth?? Is their 24hr light?? I have so many questions to ask!
Well, this is 2013, and those of us here are rocking life to the fullest, especially on NL.
We had crazy NLanders! There was even a revolution - Garri revolution! And now it is end times that is reigning!
Anyway, let me cut my letter short - I LOVE YOU GUYS! Be good citizens and stay outta trouble
#BlowsKisses

Do you still use naira!?
Does nigeria still exist??.. There was a country called nigeria and that was where I came from.

I used to fucccck girls with just 10thousand naira or a little above that... Are girls cheaper or more expensive now??