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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum (13228 Views)
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Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by 9jamum(f): 1:57pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
What’s the single most difficult aspect of single parenting? I know, we all have our different answers as the individual challenges differs from state to state and country to country. I complete agree with the fact that a role meant for two mates now belongs to an individual is enough to break one down with enough stress to last a life time. However, despite what you read from the media and hear, being a single mother is not all bad news. To encourage our beautiful strong single mothers out there are these tips to becoming a great single mum help ease through the journey. 1.Maintain a relationship with God. Whatever your religious inclination, talking to your God through prayers and reading your Holy Bible, Quran etc will only require a few minutes or hour of your time in the day. Doing this will refresh your soul, give you inner peace and renewal, hope, especially if you are facing different challenges. 2. Seek out role models: Single mums and her child(ren) can flourish. The first step is to make a list of other single mums or children raised by single mums who inspire you and refer to it as whenever they are going through a difficult day. The world is amazed how Obama turned out good from such a background. 3. Find a work schedule that suits your life style and family. Do not be afraid to express your needs to your employers by telling him or her you are a single mum / parent. Most of them will understand and assist you in getting a flexible work schedule. 4. Do not freak out over things beyond your control – if your child’s father promises to show up unannounced during an event at your child’s school. Do not loose your beauty sleep over it. That’s his wahala not yours! 5. Do make out a ‘me – time”. Being a single mum is hard work, so you deserve time off every now and then. When you create free time for yourself, you can enjoy going to the salon or spending time with friends after having left your child(ren) in the capable hands of either a baby sitter, another single mum friend or neighbour. 6. Be yourself. Do not compete with yourself. This is because, nobody is keeping scores on the unmade beds, unclean breakfast dishes and toys scattered about on some chaotic morning. Please, focus on doing the most important things to avoid lateness for you and your child (dren). These include bathing, getting dresses, having breakfast and leaving for school/ work for both you and the child(ren). You can always get back to doing these chores later. Finally, this tend to reduce or completely take the pressure off you whilst spending more quality time with your child (ren). www.singlenaijamum.com 4 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by Nobody: 5:13pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
. 1 Like |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by Nobody: 5:16pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
1.Maintain a relationship with God. Whatever your religious inclination, talking to your God through prayers and reading your Holy Bible, Quran etc will only require a few minutes or hour of your time in the day. Doing this will refresh your soul, give you inner peace and renewal, hope, especially if you are facing different challenges. How can you be a single mum and be close to God? As in konji no go hold the woman at all wetin she go come do then? no be to commit sin? |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by kokoye(m): 5:17pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Is this now something to be proud of? Nna meeennn ...na wah o 5 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by 3RNEST(m): 5:18pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
i don't think we have single mother here in NL, so no need.. |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by tefund(m): 5:18pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
would comment later |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by Nobody: 5:18pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
I applaud the OP. A woman can be a single mother in a marriage. This is real life, 2013. Make preparations! 7 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by slimyem: 5:19pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Good one. Being a single parent is no crime or unfortunate sentence. Once you find yourself there,live the life and enjoy being that as much as you can against the odds. 9 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by Nobody: 5:20pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
i'll add more when i'm less busy. nothing like experience sha |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by browncool(m): 5:22pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
9jamum:Your God is now telling you to get divorce or something? Please stop encouraging bad thing in the society 4 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by slimyem: 5:23pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Mr Aboki: wtfWhat are you the fvcking? If there can be "Tips to be a good wife/husband" Or "Tips to have a successful family", what's wrong with this? Its a reality. Single mothers are all over the place thanks to many useless sp£rm donors. Anything to ease their lives and that of their child/children should be welcome! 2 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by anitank(f): 5:23pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
kokoye: Is this now something to be proud of?some of us are not single mums by choice. Death happens u know? try thinking before talking or typing and yeah, its something to be proud of because being a mum proves that u're a real woman Don't spoil my mood this evening 18 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by Nobody: 5:25pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Single mums still looks for a man to call theirs,imagine monalisa chinda regretting how's not too good to be a single mum and yet she has it all. |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by lovelydoll: 5:34pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
ekwah: 1.Maintain a relationship with God. you should ask the samething when you fornicate. also who are you to tell a person they cannot be close to God.are you God himself . most are single because of drunkard ,useless ,abusive men ,who just don't care and end up walking away. 5 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by goshen26: 5:36pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Gentle Naaz: @op, u dy mad? Y r u giving dm tips 2 bcom single mother, u wan mk dm kil dia husband?hmmmmm, husband run your life o, there's a street in lag, that it's only land ladies all through, no land lord. |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by supaeagles(m): 5:37pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
anitank:very true. Also note, some women cannot bear children for various medical reasons, choice etc, they are also equally real women (imho) 3 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by Policewoman(f): 5:38pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Single parenting is alien to our culture and i'm against those propagating it. Our children should not be raised as bastards and from broken homes. That is why there is a total collapse of the marriage institution in the western countries. 4 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by jidewin(m): 5:38pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
9jamum: While your post is encouraging those who may choose the life style of not needing a man as husband but sperm donor(s), i want to believe no 3 is a tough choice especially in an environment such as Naija.Thank you However,nuff respect to the widows. |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by lovelydoll: 5:39pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
7. ignore ,and avoid ,ignorant men who cannot take care of their own children 8.Ignore those who cannot mind their own business ,and are always gossiping 9. know that you are a strong lady and you should have confidence ,so that you won't run into any mans arms. 10. children should always be your first priority , that boyfrd you have can be an ex boyfrd,but your kids will always be your kid. 5 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by anitank(f): 5:39pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
supaeagles:ok |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by slimyem: 5:45pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Policewoman: Single parenting is alien to our culture and i'm against those propagating it. Our children should not be raised as bastards and from broken homes. That is why there is a total collapse of the marriage institution in the western countries.So what should the society do to widows,teenage mothers, divorcees,and victims of rape? I don't think this is about propagating or advocating single parenting but encouraging those who find themselves in those shoes that they can have as much fufilling lives as their married counterparts and their children can turn out equally as good or better than those brought up by both parents if they work at it. 8 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by Originalsly: 5:47pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Hmmm...is this how you redeem yourself from the mistake of being a baby momma? Being a single parent is not something to be proud of.Parents should be role models to their children...don't you think? Why find other people to be role models? This is confirming that you yourself believe you are not a good enough parent for your child. So why advise others? If your child is a boy growing up under all your female role models how will he grow up to be a man? Is this not setting the foundation for him to be one of those hmmm...effeminate men? Then making time for yourself by dumping your child off at whoever...is that not typical baby momma mentality? Why would you be surprised if your child follows in your footsteps? We have to be careful of people like you who seek to dilute then destroy African family values. 1 Like |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by anitank(f): 5:49pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
slimyem: So what should the society do to widows,teenage mothers, divorcees,and victims of rape?u're one of the most intelligent people on NL i know 5 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by Policewoman(f): 5:52pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
slimyem: So what should the society do to widows,teenage mothers, divorcees,and victims of rape?We know how these things start. Our daughters will begin copying the oyibo in ditching marriage and rooting for single parenthood which is unhealthy for a child's raising. However i do not hold anything against those who became single parents for reasons not of their own fault. For these people i hold no grudge. 3 Likes |
Re: Tips To Becoming A Great Single Mum by dasparrow: 5:55pm On Jun 12, 2013 |
Originalsly: Hmmm...is this how you redeem yourself from the mistake of being a baby momma? Being a single parent is not something to be proud of.Parents should be role models to their children...don't you think? Why find other people to be role models? This is confirming that you yourself believe you are not a good enough parent for your child. So why advise others? If your child is a boy growing up under all your female role models how will he grow up to be a man? Is this not setting the foundation for him to be one of those hmmm...effeminate men? Then making time for yourself by dumping your child off at whoever...is that not typical baby momma mentality? Why would you be surprised if your child follows in your footsteps? We have to be careful of people like you who seek to dilute then destroy African family values. Why are you being judgmental? Is it a woman's fault should her husband suddenly die due to illness or being in a car accident and she is left to raise the children all alone? Please come off your high horse because Nigeria is a country where most people were raised in 2 parent households and yet look at what the country has become and how terrible a reputation we Nigerians have overseas and even within Africa. 2 Likes |
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