EPISODE 1

Kwaata was attacked by armed robbers in his house and the robbers after stealing everything in the house, gave Kwaata 2 options to choose from; " mek we shoot you or inject you with HIV positive blood?" they asked angrily
Kwaata trembling replied " inject me "
Soon, he was injected with the HIV positive blood and the robbers drove away.
The moment the robbers left, Kwaata burst out laffing " kwaaakwaaaakwaaaaaakwaaaaaaaaa"
His wife Ramatu surprised at him asked " why u dey laff? "

Kwaata replied " dem think say dey don inject me with AIDS but dem dont know say i dey wear CONNNNNDDOMMMMM!!! since.....already"

Ramatu suffered an instant miscarriage

EPISODE 2

kwaata lived in a bungalow with a backyArd garden. early one morning he was strolling through his garden when he spotted a guy squatting under a tree. it was ubom. the moment ubom saw kwaata he removed his cup and lowered it onto the ground.kwaata asked what ubom was doing and ubom replied that he had caught a bird and that he had covered it with his cup and wanted kwaata to watch it as he goes home to fetch a nest for his bird.kwaata obliged. the moment ubom left kwaata decided to steal the bird.he slowly dipped his hand under the cup to catch the bird but instead of a bird he got his hand covered with fresh black poo as ubom the owner of the shittz was sick of typhoid grin

EPISODE 3

Kwaata's wife, Ramatu was delivered of a bouncing baby boy,
and friends began visiting them to congratulate them and welcome the baby.
As friends kept coming, Ubom also came around, Ubom was actually owing Kwaata grin
Just as Ubom saw the baby, he screamed " hey, what a handsome baby!"
Kwaata nodded and replied " yes, that's my boy, he took after me"
Ubom again remarked " wow, nice bow-legs, what a pretty baby"
Kwaata again feeling so proud nodded and replied " yes, that's my son, he took after me"
Suddenly, the baby gave out a big-loud fart "ppppppppnnnuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!" and the room was damn smelling with flies all over,....Kwaata feeling so embarrassed this time round, said nasally " silly boy, just like his mother embarassed" grin

RAMATU fell into instant coma grin

EPISODE 4

Kwaata had never travelled to the city and was pretty uncivilised.
One day he decided to travel to the city.
He however new they were lots of pick-pockets and criminals in the city, so was cautious.
Just as he got to the city, he felt a hand in his back-pocket.
It was a pick-pocket, who was disappointed as there was no many there,
Kwaata looked at him, smiled and said "you know its because of bad people like you that's why i have hidden my money in my socks"

after he walked further for some five minutes he spotted bread, he called the bread, took some and ate, whilst the bread-seller was waiting to collect his money.
Kwaata reached for his socks to get his money, instead he got a piece of paper with the inscription " THANKS FOR THE DIRECTION, INTERNATIONAL MUMU "

Kwaata was given a sound beating by the bread seller grin


EPISODE 5

Kwaata was still in the city and one day he spotted a miraculous stand that displayed colourful lights by itself.
It was a traffic light.Kwaata had never seen a traffic light, so he stood there gazing at the traffic light grinning.
A guy was monitoring Kwaata from a distance and realised he was a bush boy, so he got there,;
Guy: Hey, who authorised u to watch government's property

Kwaata: I am sorri, i didnt know na government get this magic pillar.

Guy: Its an offence, u go pay money or make i hand u over to government?

Kwaata: Haba, i go pay.. i dey crase? how much jhoor?

Guy: Na how many times u watch am?

Kwaata: only 2 tymes bros

Guy:That one na 2000 naira

Kwaata quickly paid the money and the guy left.

Just as the guy was gone Kwaata burst out laffing out loud and said to himself " I don trick am olodo!..i watch am plenty!!!! grin grin

EPISODE 6

Kwaata had applied for an english teacher position in a secondary school.
He was invited for interview and he sat before the panel to answer questions.

Panel: You are welcome Mr Kwaata

Kwaata: Same to you

Panel: Well, you applied to teach English, tell us about yourself

Kwaata: I am Kwaata, and you all sitting here know i am Kwaata dont you? you do. I am very englishy Allah. I can spoke engrish even with the queen of Norway. I doesnt knows why you is even wasting yours time to interfiew me , just gave me the job

Panel:Well Mr Kwaata, we thank you so much..erm you will hear from us

Kwaata: Why? we no go negotiate salary before??

Panel: You will hear from us please

Kwaata: okay, i want to left

Panel:okay bye

After Kwaata left, the entire Panel burst out laffing out loud grin grin

EPISODE 7

Kwaata after eating a heavy meal of eba and egusi felt pressed, so rushed to the public toilet. he quickly undressed, squatted and began "releasing". after 30 minutes, he had managed to drop just a piece of "shittz" which was still hanging in his anus. he pressed and pressed and pressed for hours and the hanging shittz was still not dropping, so out of frustrations, he used his hand to tear the shittz from his anus and Said to himself " mtcheew, common shittz sef wan bribe? what is this country turning to?", he got up and left even though he had not finished. grin

EPISODE 8

Kwaata bumped into a fresh accident scene.
Victims with various degrees of injuries were writhing in pain at the accident site.
The few dead ones were also quiet lying on the ground.
Kwaata was the only passer-by, so he looked left, right, sure no one was watching him, applied some blood stains on his body and in his shirt and joined the accident victims on the ground with the hope of benefiting from the car's insurance.
He quickly joined the wailing; "oh, oh, mmm, mmm, god save me, i don die ooo. .."
Little did he know one of the real victims was monitoring the proceedings, so he told Kwaata angrily "oga!, you better leave hia before police go come oooo!. . .we know ourselves, we are thirty"
Kwaata quickly got up, and took to his heels grin

EPISODE 9

it was sunday school, and pastor Akpors was teaching his sunday school pupils about obedience and told them the story of Abraham and the sacrifice of isaac. Pastor Akpors asked the children " if u were isaac that your father wanted to kill, what would u do?" most of the children answered they would run away, then it got to Kwaata,

he replied with a frowned face " My father would run away, i swear!!" grin

EPISODE 10

mr and mrs okeke had a visitor, Kwaata.because of this, mr okeke had to share his matrimonial bed with Kwaata the visitor for mrs Okeke to sleep at the hall.NOw in the night, Kwaata left the bedroom on 3 occasions to go and urinate.
early next morning, mrs okeke asked her husband "so do u have to come to the hall thrice to bleep me, even when we had a visitor?" MR Okeke replied loudly " me?" Kwaata who was monitoring got the hint so tiptoed and took to his heels, still errect. mrs okeke fainted. grin grin grin

EPISODE 11

Mr and Mrs Akpors lived happily with their son Kwaata in Onitscha.
One day, Mrs Akpors called her son to send her.
Mrs Akpors: Hey, Kwaata?..

Kwaata: yes, mama..

Mrs Akpors: Now take this money and go to the market,


Kwaata: and what make i buy?

Mrs Akpors: Ehen, buy eggs, suya, erm, moin-moin, viju milk, ground-nuts....*still listing, then Mr Akpors who was listening interrupted*

Mr aKPORS: kWAATA, dont forget to buy me air freshner grin grin

EPISODE 12

KwaataA met this prrosstittutte and the following ensued:

Kwaata:hi, how much is 1 round?

prost:800 naira

Kwaata:How about all night?

Prost: all night? let me see. . , *pulls calculator and checks*, well i think it will be 8000 naira

Kwaata:no problem!!!

so they entered a hotel at 7:30pm. Kwaata did the first round. five minutes later, he did the second round.ten minutes later, he did the third round.then the fourth round and on and on and on till 4am in the morning.Kwaata had already had about thirty five rounds.
Now at 5am, Kwaata woke up the ashewoo and attempted doing the 36th round then the Ashewoo boiled up and yelled him " a-a !!you wan kill me abi, how much you go pay self, mtcheeew . . . .abi dem send u say make u come destroy my business grin grin

EPISODE 13

Kwaata had spent so much on Ekaitte, hoping to "flogg" grin her one day,
but ekaitte always had an excuse to escape grin
One day, Ekaitte was in Kwaata's room when it began raining.
She had no excuse so Kwaata turned off the lights,
Soon, Ekaitte screamed "ah ah oga Kwaata, that one na my ear-hole oo"
Kwaata replied "shhhhhhhhhhhhhh, today every hole go get hin own" grin


ekkaitee fainted grin

EPISODE 14

Teacher: Kwaata, What goes after 69?

Kwaata: erm....69?...erm

Teacher: Foolish boy, i said what goes after 69??

Kwaata: Sah, mouthwash....



The teacher died instantly


EPISODE 15

Kwaata Joseph, a third year student in the boarding house was leaving the school's premises when he met his teacher Mr Akpors. THe ff ensued between them

MR AKPORS: Hey, kwaata, where are u going to?

Kwaata: Please sir, i is going to the market

MR AKPORS: What are u going to do in the market?

Kwaata: Please sir, i am going to buy some equipments

MR AKPORS: Which equipments?

Kwaata: SIr, tomatoes, pepper, cabbage, garlic, ginger, garri, okro and fish

MR AKPORS: And are these things called equipments?

Kwaata: Sorry sir..i am remember sir, they are called instruments sir

MR AKPORS: wHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? angry

Kwaata: sorry sir, i am now remember sir,...gadgets sir....






mr Akpors was already on the ground with foam all over his mouth

EPISODE 16

A teacher left with his last coins, spotted his student Kwaata and asked him to go buy eba for him.
Because the money was his last and not enough, he instructed Kwaata not to buy any fish.
Kwaata had left, and the teacher Mr Badmus was at the assembly grounds conducting the morning's devotion.
When the assembly was very quiet, Kwaata appeared from the back with a bowl and yelled " sah please i have brought the eba, but the seller dashed you bones since you didnt buy any meat.." to the hearing of the entire school.
Mr Badmus embarrassed at the time, replied " Kwaata, that food is for you, go and eat it.."
He however fainted immediately

EPISODE 17
Kwaata was 48 years, and his family always pestered him to get married.
One hot afternoon, Kwaata brought home a very ugly looking woman.
"where did u buy this monkey?" Kwaata's father asked
Kwaata angered by the question replied " i wont take that insult from you papa, this lady is my fiancee"
The father fainted
Kwaata's mother angrily yelled " ei, kwaata, so because of this chimpanzee, you want to kill your papa?"
Kwaata stammered a reply "MA-MA-MA MAMA, DONT MIND THE BODY, MIND THE ENGINE"

KWAATA'S MOTHER MESSED 3 TIMES and miscarried

EPISODE 18

Kwaata was in court for defilling a 7 year old girl, and the he stood before the judge:

Judge: mr kwaata...

Kwaata: talk..

Judge: you are accused of defilling this 7 year old girl, guilty or not guilty?

Kwaata: not guilty na..i dey craze?

judge: explain..

Kwaata: mr judge listen, this girl is not 7 years and she rather rapped me..

Judge: and how do u know she is not 7?
Kwaata: if u like, go try and see, she will drown u..seeing is believing.

EPISODE 19

Kwaata was a teacher in the jss and had always dreamt of "screwing" Agnes, a little girl in JSS 2.
Anytime mr Kwaata approached Agnes, Agnes replied " no, i am afraid its painful"
One day, After lots of talk , Agnes finally agreed to Kwaata's demands on the condition that, she would be holding a Knife, so that if it was painful, she would stab him. Kwaata agreed to the terms and they began the "match"
After only two minutes into the match,...........

...............guess what?.....................


..............Agnes threw away the knife grin grin Kwaata dey form worlahi

EPISODE 20

Madam Grace, the female teacher in primary six was marking the class' register when somebody messed.
After asking "who messed " several times without response, she grabbed a cane and decided to lash all of them.
After giving all the pupils 6 hot lashes each, it was the turn of Kwaata.
As Madam grace lifted the cane, Kwaata in stammer style screamed " becareful you dont hit my eye with that cane oo...if you hit my eye you go marry me, i swear !!"
Madam Grace Miscarried her 6months old pregnancy


EPISODE 21

it was early morning and Papa Goro had woken up.
He stepped out and saw someone coming out of his car.
He looked closer and it was his friend Kwaata sweating profusely and panting holding a gear lever.
"Kwaata, what are u doing in my car this early morning? and where did u get that gear lever from?" Papa GOro asked angrily
Kwaata beaming with smiles replied " ha, Goro thank me oo, i have been here since dawn.."
"why mek i thank you? what have u done?" Goro asked
Kwaata replied again " u see this thing wey u have been trying to uproot since anytime u are driving, i don finally remove am for you...beht i tire oo "
Papa Goro suffered a stroke instantly grin

EPISODE 22

a female english teaher was teaching her jss 2 class about auxilliary verbs . she taught that, the past of the verb can is could and have is had. She later asked them to form sentences each. Kwaata stood up and said "madam, i can make you happy tonight". present.
" madam, i could make u happy last night" past.
" madam have u c.ome?" present
" madam had u c.ome?" past

the teacher had her menses instantly! grin


EPISODE 23

Kwaata was in Jss 2 when the science teacher was teaching about teenage pregnancy.
The teacher got to how to prevent teenage pregnancy and lots of hands were up,
so teacher first called Ramatu;
Ramatu: sir, we can prevent Teenage pregnancy by abstaining from sex;

Teacher: Good, Ramatu!, next Akpan?

Akpan: Sah, by use of contraceptives like condom

Teacher: Good one there, Akpan, next you Kwaata?

Kwaata: Sah, its simple na....

Teacher: How, kwaata?

Kwaata: Sah, by simply aborting the teenage pregnancy na grin

The Teacher pissed all over himself, after which he fainted, died and suffered a stroke grin

EPISODE 24

Kwaata was a village champion and everyone especially children feared him a lot.
Anytime he saw children playing football, he would catch the ball and destroy it.
When he saw children playing, he would grab a cane and lash them.
One hot afternoon, he was walking around the village when he saw some children firing knockouts.
He became angry and seized all the unused knockouts and put them in his pocket and chased the children away.
Early dawn, Kwaata picked three sticks of cigarrette and made for the village public toilet to go smoke and shittzz as he often did.
He got there, began shittzing, took one cigarrette from his pocket lighted it and slotted it in his mouth.
After 1 minute a bombblast sound echoed from the toilet.
Kwaata's upper lip was gone, leaving his brown teeth bare.
He lighted the knockouts grin grin

EPISODE 25

Kwaata went to the restaurant and the moment the waitress saw him she said "bros, i know you are here to buy Eba and egwusi soup"
Kwaata replied "you are correct"
Then the waitress came again " I know you will like cow leg and goat head in you soup?
Kwaata again replied "You are correct"
Then the waitress again "i know you will balance the meal with 3 bottles of stout"
Kwaata again replied "your head dey there , you are correct "
Soon, Kwaata was served his meal and drinks and after 5 minutes he had done justice to them.
He drank some water and posed in an on-your-marks position.
The waitress seeing this queried "bros, you wan run away??"

Kwaata already 100 meters gone replied from afar " Gbam!!....you are correeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeect" grin grin grin

EPISODE 26

The new class 5 teacher entered the class and wanted to know more about the pupils,
so he first asked them of their favourite meals.
The teacher went round and every pupil enthusiastically stated their favourite meals till it got to Kwaata , the most mumu pupil who occupied the last seat and he answered " sah please somebody has said mine"
Next, the teacher asked them to mention their favourite subjects at school, and again he went round till it got to Kwaata; but same answer from him " Sah please somebody has said mine "
Then finally The teacher asked them the last question, the easiest, but Kwaata again answered " Sah please somebody has said mine"

The teacher suffered instant stroke grin

The last question was " what is your name?" grin

EPISODE 27

Kwaata's daughter, Erimma was not doing well at school,
So he hired a home teacher for her, the Teacher was Mr OGBUVUGBUVU.
mR OGBUVUGBUVU asked Kwaata which subjects he will teach Erimma and Kwaata replied "all subjects"
After six months, Kwaata found out that Erimma was pregnant, so he asked her and she confessed it was MR OGBUVUGBUVU who was responsible.
"So where did he make you pregnant?" Kwaata asked
Errimma replied "Daddy in the garden!!" grin
Kwaata was angry, so he summoned MR OGBUVGBUVU.

Kwaata: mr man, what did i employ u for?

MR OGBUVUBGUVU: That's a steewpid question, u know i teach

Kwaata: Who made Erimma pregnant?

MR OGBUVUGBUVU: Another steewpid one, u know it me

Kwwaata: listen, was that part of the teaching work?

MR OGBUVUGBUVU: of course, remember, u asked me to teach all subjects? so i taught her all....besides when last did you pay me?..i had to compensate myself with your daughter . Now tell me oga Kwaata, who is responsible for " drupy", the family dog's pregnancy?

Kwaata: Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! we can settle this amicably now sah grin grin



Erimma miscarried instantly grin grin

EPISODE 28

Kwaata travelled to Lagos with his wife booqee .
THey got to Lagos rather late so booqee asked Kwaata " its late , w e must find something to eat. what are we gonna eat?"
.
.
Kwaata replied " you find something to eat, i will eat you "








booqee farted instantly....lol

EPISODE 29

Akpors met Kwaata at a mechanic shop, apparently both coming to fix their cars.
They were seeing for the first time, and the following ensued between them

Akpors: Hi, i am Akpors

Kwaata: Hi, this is Kwaata

Akpors: You have a problem with your car?

Kwaata: Obviously, that's why we are both here...or?

Akpors: yes yes...do mind we hang out at the beer spot behind this shop?

Kwaata: NO lipsrsealed

Akpors: Why you dont take beer?

Kwaata: Yes, i hate beer

Akpors: Why?

Kwaata at this point held his left chest, his heart area

Akpors: Why, you are hypertensive?

kWAata: No, God forbid?

Akpors: why then do you hold your left chest?

Kwaata: Breeast

Akpors: oh, oh, you hate alcohol but love breastt is it?

Kwaaata: Gbam!!!

Akpors: But that one na more expensive as compared to beer?

Kwaata: All good products are expensive

Akpors: But you can get diseases through drinking breassts?

Kwaata: Let me tell u my friend, there are several types of breastts; we have fresh ones which are disease free and the rotten and archaic ones that contain diseases

Akpors: how can u determine its fresh or rotten?

Kwaata: simple my brother....direction from the bra grin grin grin if they are pointing north, then healthy but if they are down south and fallen like over-used socks, then rotten grin


Akpors fainted instantly grin

EPISODE 30

Kwaata had been promoted to primary 5
and the teacher Miss Erimma was going round asking the pupils addition questions.
She got to the first boy and asked "40 + 6?" the boy replied " forty six" "good" teacher replied and moved on
"yes you, " 50+4" and the pupil replied "madam fifty four ".....again good the teacher remarked
The teacher went round and round and round till she got to the last seat occupied the boy himself Kwaata

the teacher asked "yes you, Kwaata, 60 + 10 ?"

Kwaata stood up and stammered " Ma-ma-ma Madam, its SIXTY TEN" grin




The teacher miscarried her 8 months old pregnancy instantly

EPISODE 31

Once a plane crashed somewhere in the mountains, only a monkey who was traveling in the plane was left alive.

Fortunately the monkey was intelligent enough to understand English and reply. The officials went to see the monkey in the hospital and had a talk with the monkey.

Officer: “When the plane took off what were the travelers doing?”
Monkey: “Tying their belts”

Officer: “What were the air hostesses doing?”
Monkey: “Saying Hello! Good morning!”

plane-crash.jpg

Officer: “What were the pilots doing?”
Monkey: “Checking the system”

Officer: “What were you doing?”
Monkey: “Looking for my people”

Officer: “After 10 minutes what were the travelers doing?”
Monkey: “Having beverages and snacks”

Officer: “What were the air hostesses doing?”
Monkey: “Serving the travelers”

Officer: “What were the Pilots doing?”
Monkey: “Handling the steering”

Officer: “What were you doing?”
Monkey: “Eating & throwing”

Officer: “After 30 minutes what were the travelers doing?”
Monkey: “Some were sleeping and some were reading”

Officer: “What were the air hostesses ?”
Monkey: “Make up”

Officer: “What were the pilots doing?”
Monkey: “Handling the steering”

Officer: “What were you doing?”
Monkey: “Nothing”

inte-monkey.jpg

Officer: “Just before plane crash what were the travelers doing?”
Monkey: “All were sleeping”

Officer: “What were the air hostesses doing?”
Monkey: “Kissing the pilots”

Officer: “What were the pilots doing?”
Monkey: “Responding”

Officer: “What were you doing?”
Monkey: “Handling the steering !!!” grin grin



the officer who was no other person than Kwaata had a stroke immediately grin grin

EPISODE 32

Ramatu; it's paining me,

Kwaata; make I remove am,

Ramatu; no grin


EPISODE 33

A pipe bursts in a doctor’s house. He called the Kwaata the plumber. Kwaata The plumber arrived, unpacked the tools, did some plumber-type things and handed the doctor the bill for 60000 naira,The doctor exclaimed ‘This is ridiculous! I don’t even make that much as a doctor!’Kwaata replied quietly, ‘Neither did i when i was a doctor.’ grin

EPISODE 34

Kwaata, a policeman was sent to a village to arrest a hardened criminal.
He went with two other officers, corporal Ubom and inspector Akpors
When they got there, the criminal was sitting bare-chested in front of his house.
At the first sight of him, all the policemen trembled in fear as the criminal was well-built.
Tall, fat, and huge with biiiiiiiiig muscles.
The criminal upon seeing the policemen with a very deep voice questioned "wetin you dey look for?"
Kwaata trembling replied "please sah, sah we were sent to come and come and. . ."
"come and wetin?" the criminal screamed
Then corporal ubom answered "sah please to arrest,..ewuoo, sorry i mean adress..."
the criminal interrupted "shut up!!!.why are you here?"
Then the inspector akpors replied shaking " sah , please we are lost" grin grin

EPISODE 35

Kwaata who was dating ekaitte always asked ekkaite this question "when will you invite me to your house?"
The usual answer ekaitte gave him was, "my uncle is around, he is very mean and strict"
on 24th december, Kwaata asked ekaitte the usual question again but this time round, ekaitte's response was "okay, you can come, since my uncle would go to night service"
Kwaata was excited and errreccted all of a sudde.
He wore his new suit on 25th evening, and made for ekaitte's house.
Just when he got there, he spotted a bonfire on the compound.
He moved closer to the bonfire thinking "wow, ekaitte and i go chill tonight around this fire"
but just as he got to the bornfire, a loud voice asked him angrily "hey you, little boy, what do you want in my compound angry?" *it was ekaitte's uncle*
Kwaata trembling and confused replied "please sah, abeg i am here to burn my suit embarassed"
the uncle replied "now drop the suit in the fire fast and leave!!" grin


EPISODE 36

The police went to arrest a thief (Kwaata ), hand-cuffed him and were taking him to the station on foot.
Along the way Kwaata the thief requested to piss.
Because his both hands were hand-cuffed, one policeman opened Kwaata's zip, pulled his kpekus and piss began flowing.
For 45 minutes, urine was still flowing.
After some time, it stopped so the policeman angrily grabbed the Kpekus and pushed it back in the pants.
Kwaata vexed and shouted "you no go shake am?, if na your own, you no go shake am make the droplets commot before? mtcheew!" grin


EPISODE 37

after a hard day's work, Kwaata went to the bar to cool off and eat something, after several hours of waiting, Kwaata finally saw the waiter approaching with his requested fufu and bitter-leaf soup, but was shocked to see the waiter's left thumb dipped in his soup.Kwaata boiled up and questioned the waiter,
Kwaata:And what the hell is your thump doing in my soup?
WAITER:oh, sorry i have a sore on my thumb,
Kwaata:go to the hospital then, is my soup hospital?
WAITER:i was there and the doctor says i must dip it in a hot substance sah!
Kwaata sadwondering), hot substance? why dont you insert your thumb into your anus then? it is even hotter there!
WAITER:but sah, it has been in my anus since morning!, i just removed it.Kwaata fainted! grin grin

EPISODE 38

Junior went to his daddy kwaata after school and asked "daddy, do you know accra?"
daddy kwaata replied "that's the capital of Ghana, thats where i attended high school"
junior asked again"dad do you know New york?"
Daddy kwaata replied "i got my first degree in new york"
junior asked again "so how about london?"
"i was in london for my 43rd birthday"
junior said again " daddy, then you must know geography so well oo. . ."







Kwaata replied "you know, geography was where i married your mother" grin








Junior ereccted!!!! grin


EPISODE 39

Kwaata had a long hair and beard and lived alone in a single room at onitsha.one night, thieves broke into his room and stole all his valuables.while kwaata was still asleep the thieves shaved all his long hair and beard.
Kwaata woke up and saw his room looted so he began crying.He touched his head and saw it was shaved so stopped crying and said " thank God say e no be me!, what a mistaken identity" grin grin


EPISODE 4O

Kwaata was married to uju and after 38 miscarriages, uju finally bore Akrika a son whom they named Okon.
15 years later, Kwaata was sitting under a tree on their compound with his wife and son when he suddenly said "I wish i had money to buy a hummer jeep!"
Okon quickly replied "hey, i would ride the hummer jeep to school each morning o. . ."
Okon didnt finish his statement when Kwaata landed two strong dirty slaps on his face accompanied by abusive words "bad child!!!, you are a bad child!!, e no go well for you. . . angry"
Uju so confused asked "Papa Okon, wetin? why do you slap our only son like that??"
Kwaata replied. . .
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
."why i no go slap am, when this your lazy son is misusing my fuel grin. .. .dont you know fuel is expensive?? angry










Uju suddenly was attacked by stroke grin grin






pimples grew on Okon's teeth

EPISODE 41

A man gave a FAKE N20 note to Kwaata a blind man by
the road side, who was begging for alms.
Kwaata the blind man said, excuse me sir, but I
have to tell u that ur money is fake and I dont like
it.
The man was suprised and said, how did u know
its fake??
The blind man, (Kwaata) replied,"Well i'm not blind,
i'm standing in for my blind friend who always
stands here.
The man asked, and where is ur friend?? The blind
man (Kwaata) said, he has gone to the cinema to
watch a movie!


EPISODE 42

Landlord:Kwaata, How can you tell if your girlfriend really likes you?

KwaAta: If you stick your hand in her pants and it feels like you're feeding a horse

This takes the award for the driest set of joke have come across in my entire life

ayswags: This takes the award for the driest set of joke have come across in my entire life

guy park well jor.oga bin i troway cap for you.

ikechukz: guy park well jor.oga bin i troway cap for you.

thanks my king, but please dont mind that hernia patient okay?

Lol