Hello everyone,good mornin to you all,please i need your advice,met a man some months back,he has been very nice to me,caring,loving,respectful,we have great plans together,he has great intensions for me,right from the begining of this relationship he told me everything about himself,what he does for a living,about his family,and every thing i needed to know at the start of a relationship,he told me he has a daughter who is 16years old in ss2,and that she stays with his sister,i was happy he could tell me the truth from the start,last week,he came to see me and asked if we could have lunch,so we could talk privately,so i left my shop in the care of my sales girl and went for lunch with him at an eatry.while lunch was on,he went on his knees in tears and proposed to me,i was short of words and asked him up on his feet,i told him i would give him a reply soon after i think about it,friends what do i do,am confused, getting married to a man who has a 16year old,i do't know,at first i asked him what his daugther would say,he said she would want his happiness,yes she would but how would she cop with me,would i be able to love her like my own child when i start having children,he wants the daugther to come spend her holiday with me,am confused i do not know what to do,i do not know how to handle this,please advice me.....

whats your age and the mans age

You are busy worrying about the 16 years old child that he has, instead of worrying about having your own child. Ok stay there and be thinking of it till menopause visit u in your shop.

Secondly I don't think the man is doing so well financially, which is also one of the reasons ur worried .

Even though this ur story sounds abit cooked up, which is also one of the reasons I feel he is not so comfortable.

He carry u go restaurant in Nigeria for afternoon, kneel down in tears dey beg u to marry him? Why he dey cry? U be miss world?


The picture I have is a man that is not doing much, but you have been taking care of him, cooking for him and being nice.

He knows ur better off than himself, so he decided to marry you to ease his problems, or possibly you can join resources together and start something.

Ofcourse u will contribute more, because u earn more.

Posters above have good points.

So, answer those questions and let's pick it from there. (i). How old are you (ii). What exactly if your fear? Is it by any chance related to the fact that he's not too rich?

Baby there's absolutely no big deal about it, you can love this girl as your blood and flesh except you get irritated by people easily, You fiancee told you because he want you take her like your daughter, Let me tell you, your attitude would determine the girl's attitude towards you, The girl is just 16 na,
If you really love your man this doesn't stop you from get married to him.

sexymoma: Baby there's absolutely no big deal about it, you can love this girl as your blood and flesh except you get irritated by people easily, You fiancee told you because he want you take her like your daughter, Let me tell you, your attitude would determine the girl's attitude towards you, The girl is just 16 na,
If you really love your man this doesn't stop you from get married to him.

........thanks you just gave the best advice,i appricate it alot.GOD bless you

No be every topic i go comment..

#passing with my weed

sexymoma: Baby there's absolutely no big deal about it, you can love this girl as your blood and flesh except you get irritated by people easily, You fiancee told you because he want you take her like your daughter, Let me tell you, your attitude would determine the girl's attitude towards you, The girl is just 16 na,
If you really love your man this doesn't stop you from get married to him.

wow!!! This is a surprise!!! So the devil can give such a good advice?

KINGwax: wow!!! This is a surprise!!! So the devil can give such a good advice?

EXsqueeze moi , do i write like a devil, you sha dey look for tuoble

nancyberry: ........thanks you just gave the best advice,i appricate it alot.GOD bless you

you welcome sweerry.

Where are people getting the idea that the man isn't rich from?

Secondly, the girl is 16 years old in SS 2. This means that she will soon be thinking about University. Soon after that, if she's your typical Naija girl, she'll be thinking of settling down and marrying. So really, your interactions with this girl will not be too much. I imagine both of you will be civil to each other because of the man, anything more than that will be a bonus.

nancyberry: Hello everyone,good mornin to you all,please i need your advice,[b]met a man some months back,[/b]he has been very nice to me,caring,loving,respectful,we have great plans together,he has great intensions for me,right from the begining of this relationship he told me everything about himself,what he does for a living,about his family,and every thing i needed to know at the start of a relationship,he told me he has a daughter who is 16years old in ss2,and that she stays with his sister,i was happy he could tell me the truth from the start,last week,he came to see me and asked if we could have lunch,so we could talk privately,so i left my shop in the care of my sales girl and went for lunch with him at an eatry.while lunch was on,he went on his knees in tears and proposed to me,i was short of words and asked him up on his feet,i told him i would give him a reply soon after i think about it,friends what do i do,am confused, getting married to a man who has a 16year old,i do't know,at first i asked him what his daugther would say,he said she would want his happiness,yes she would but how would she cop with me,would i be able to love her like my own child when i start having children,he wants the daugther to come spend her holiday with me,am confused i do not know what to do,i do not know how to handle this,please advice me.....

easy up, gal. it is just a few months and he is proposing marriage, i will advice that u dont accept. tell him u sholud keep dating,let his daughter meet you aand observe him carefully
he may have various reasons for proposing so early, from infatuation to pure lust( do u have sex with him? if not check for this) to pressure from parents and peers(i mean he has a 16 yrs old daughter so am expecting at least a man in his late thirties). he may even just want to use u as a trophy wife(show u off to his friends while actually living and enjoying his life with another gal), or he may be interested in ur money. and again he may JUST ACTUALLY LOVE YOU. so mine advice remains the same, dont accept it yet, explain that u luv him(i should guess u do) but you dont want to rush things, get to know him and his daughter better. i guess after that, you will find answers to other questions that those concernin the welfare of ur own kids after marriage

sexymoma: EXsqueeze moi , do i write like a devil, you sha dey look for tuoble

u will have to do better than this to scare me

@OP
as someone said earlier, you are focusing on his daughter, while instead you should focus on the fact that you know absolutely NOTHING about this stranger. take time to know him, discover him, fancy him, LOVE him, and possibly want to spend the rest of your life with him.....only then can you talk of marriage.

that man is desperate, and wants you for the wrong reasons, to say the least!

MRbrownJAY: @OP
as someone said earlier, you are focusing on his daughter, while instead you should focus on the fact that you know absolutely NOTHING about this stranger. take time to know him, discover him, fancy him, LOVE him, and possibly want to spend the rest of your life with him.....only then can you talk of marriage.

that man is desperate, and wants you for the wrong reasons, to say the least!

thanks dear....i would do just that,get to know him better,

Man_51ut: Where are people getting the idea that the man isn't rich from?

Secondly, the girl is 16 years old in SS 2. This means that she will soon be thinking about University. Soon after that, if she's your typical Naija girl, she'll be thinking of settling down and marrying. So really, your interactions with this girl will not be too much. I imagine both of you will be civil to each other because of the man, anything more than that will be a bonus.

thanks for this.....,it really went a long way,i should try to worry less

You said you met him "some months back", but didn't say exactly how long you've known him for. It takes time to truly get to know someone. If you've only know him for some months, it's too soon to get married, imo. You also have not met his daughter, which is really important for you to do before marrying him. Just make sure you know what you're getting yourself into; don't rush.

sexymoma: Baby there's absolutely no big deal about it, you can love this girl as your blood and flesh except you get irritated by people easily, You fiancee told you because he want you take her like your daughter, Let me tell you, your attitude would determine the girl's attitude towards you, The girl is just 16 na,
If you really love your man this doesn't stop you from get married to him.

Ditto sexymomma. U are 100percent right.