I came late thou but following

I hope you guys still got something meaningful to contribute here? i don't wanna waste my precious time over nothing

Nice one though.

Huh? Following!!!

oooo my gooooossshh,i meannn wat a conference of confusion grammatical gigantic toriii.huuh ordinary small eye or mind cannot grab meaning to tissss history and portin to nairaland uni .and let me ask is ogugua88 a gal or a guy.because d pik na a yellowishh guy pose there ooooo

Lolzzz!! Xynerise won't kill me ohh. That was a nice write up buddy!!

After a week of his stay at nairaland university and department of Literature, a new student joined the Literature department. It was a relief for Moltenmagma as he had been named the newbie of the department for a week and it was almost taking up his name. He hardly took part in any class discussion as the course rep Mynd always barks at him whenever he speaks up. The course rep looks like a disturbed fellow as he always feel irritated at anything happening in the department. The departmental rumor monger, Foxy had once told him that Mynd got suspended from the Music department before finding solace at the Literature department. Whatever is it, Moltenmagma was glad a new student had come and would definitely take over the newbie role while he feels free to engage in the class discussions.

One thing was troubling Mm; he was yet to get an accommodation from the Nairaland University Hostel. He was still squatting with an old school mate of his, Obinoscopy. Obino had promised to take him to the Properties department of the Nairaland university to see who he referred to as Lawyer. Mm had to endure the most boring lecture he had witnessed since his enrolment into the department. It was coming from Dr.. Orikinla, who prided himself as the most educated writer in the department. He was tormenting them with a boring lecture of how he writes for Punch and Vanguard newspapers and how his column was the most read in the entire country. The only lecture he had enjoyed since his stay in that department was that of cuddlemii. He finds her classy, intriguing and captivating. She had giving them an assignment to submit a poem before the end of the next month; a feat he was going to ensure he wins.
As the boastful and boring Orikinla rounded off his lectures, Mm headed down to the History department, where it seems the only thing they do in that department was keep and collect history of people. They were nicknamed the Diary department, and this is where his old school mate, Obino studies.

“My boyfriend is sleeping with my mother”; was boldly displayed on the big screen at the University central square. Mm passed by without having a second look.

On getting to the department, obinoscopy and teeo was arguing over something he couldn’t understand. Seems they were arguing something about Caracta, while the one that called herself uju_sizzle was laughing like a fish-head.
An advanced lady walked into the lecture hall. Mm could have sworn she looked like a toy; with heavy make-up and extra wig on her hair that made her look like a teddy-bear.
“Calloti “the” Jelloti!” they hailed her.
“Muchechechecheche” she laughed like a battery operated toy.
“Lasinoh “the” calloti” another hailed her. “where are you coming from?” uju asked her.
“I went to do my ashewo business.” She answered. “Thanks to my agnostic gawd, I henjoyy my life; muchechecheche” she laughed again.
Mm found her irritating, but it seems her classmates love her and make jokes with her. She made her way to a big shelve at one extreme of the class.
“Alisoby, where is my diary?” she retorted.
“Which one? You know say you get more than 49 diaries.” Said alisoby who seemed to be the diary tender.
Just then, Obinoscopy walked up to Mm and they left the Diary department, walking towards the Property section that houses the office of Nairaland Hostel.
The Lawyer, who was in charge of hostel accommodations informed Mm that there was no room left for freshers. When it seems all hope was lost, Lawyer informed him of an agent at the same property department that could fix him up with a cool off camp accommodation. He was giving the number of eziobodo and asked to call him.
He met up with the eziobodo who told him to make a downpayment of N5,000 for agency fee. After considering it for a while, he paid the money. He needed to find a room for himself as staying with obino with his other 6 roommates was driving him insane. There was something wrong with each and every one of the roommates; cfcfan snores so much that the walls of the room vibrates when he sleeps. 190 was a gene away from being a clown. He came to Nairaland university with a very old 190 mercedes benz. The car was so old that some parts of its body was falling off, or held together by super glue. The room was filled with empty and half empty tubes of super glue and uhu gum. 2legit2qwt was a music freak and would play music even at odd hours. Obino makes midnight calls every night, thereby disturbing him while he slept. Obino had a timetable for his night calls; 6 days a week for 6 different girls. Caracta, uju_sizzle, gracie etc. yet he keeps complaining that he needs a girlfriend.

When he couldn’t take the disturbance no more, he called eziobodo to ask about the room. They met and he was informed that the only room available was at Sexuality Hostel. He agreed without hesitating; anything is better than where he was presently staying.
obinoscopy tried to discourage him from moving into sexuality hostel, but Mm was headstrong.
Anything was better than staying at the same room with 190 and co. He moved.

Jay bee was having one of his bad days as a caretaker of Sexuality hostel. He was always having a hard time with the students in the hostel. Today, the toilet of a block of rooms got stuck and none could flush. He had brought dabosky, the plumber to trace the fault and they were on the process of opening up one of the sealed chambers when he was told that a new student was asking after him. He had discussed with Mm the previous day and had told him about the bank payments and all he needed to do before moving in. He saw mm standing by the hostel gate and sent for him. There was no way he was going to abandon the work he was doing to go and attend to a new inmate.
“The fault is from here!” The dabosky declared.

Mm drew closer to the small crowd gathered where the guy was working.

“We have to break open this chamber.” He said to no one in particular as he moved for his tool-box and brought out a big hammer. After few minutes of hitting the chamber, he pulled it open and Mm almost threw up at the sight. Everyone witnessing it yelled and screamed as the plumber used the shovel to scoop out rolls of condoms that had blocked the chamber. Over a thousand of them! They were meshed together with tissue papers!

“dis na handiwork of Camerounpride.” Shouted one of the hostel inmates and everyone around laughed.

“its not him, he doesn’t fvckk with condoms.” Replied a feminine voice.

“flytefalls, how you take know say Cameroun no dey use condom?” one of the guys asked and they all continued the laughter.

“Then it must be coolval, his room is connected to this particular chamber.” The same guy said and they continued their laughter session.

After this, jaybee took Mm inside the hostel after checking his bank payment slip. As they walked on the corridor, to check the new room, Mm started having a weird feeling about the hostel. The rooms he passed as he followed jaybee had inscriptions on top of the door. Seems the occupants derive joy in inscribing their names in front of their room doors. He was seeing names like bigpussylover, born2fck, born2fckpussy, pastorpussy, Redbenson, kayemjay, coolval and so on. They climbed up to the first floor. He noticed big banners with pictures of pretty girls pasted all over the staircase. He paused to take a look. They were gorgeous pix of pretty girls.
“That’s the handiwork of Onila.” Jaybee informed him.

“who is Onila?” he asked.

“Our virgin.” Jaybee replied with a smile on his face.

They kept moving, only to be interrupted when a girl almost naked walked out of one of the rooms. She was wearing just pants and bra as she walked ahead of them, to her own room. She turned at her door and caught mm staring at her.
“What are you looking at?” she fired at Mm who started stammering as he could not find the right words to defend himself.

“Blue eyes, leave the guy alone” jaybee came to his defense.
“Ashewo!” Blue eyes screamed at tem both before entering her room.

They finally got to his room door. Jaybee was trying out the key while Mm took some time to check out the neighboring rooms. His room was sandwiched between two rooms, the one on the right had –Mazi: Sex Addict - written on its door while the one on the left had –Kayemjay: Grand commander, Federal Republic of yanshing - written on its door.
“Is this the Mazi omenuko of Literature department?” Mm asked jaybee, hoping that it was his coursemate that was occupying the room. At least, he would have someone to read together with.

“Yes, you know him?” jaybee asked.

“Yes, he is in the same department with me.” Mm informed him.
Jaybee shrugged his shoulder like he wanted to say something but rather changed his mind and kept quite. He succeeded in opening the door and ushered him to his new room. The old occupant had left an old carpet, a foam and wall hanger. Mm was satisfied with the room. He decided to clean it up immediately and move his things from Obino’s room.

Obino, 190 and his friend D-Explorer helped Moltenmagma move his things to the new hostel. They settled on the room and talked for a while. 190 and D-Explorer were already exploring the new territory. D-Explorer came back and declared that he has just collected a number from one of the babes.
“Her name is Onila.” He declared.

“The caretaker said she is our hostel virgin.” Moltenmagma informed them. 190, D-Explorer and Obino exchanged glance at each other, and busted out of a long session of laughter. When they were thru with the laughter, Mm asked why they were laughing.

“Virgin in Sexuality hostel. Isn’t that an irony?” Obino asked and they all started the laughter again.

It was later that night that Mm understood why his pals where laughing, and why Obino tried to discourage him from moving to the hostel.

The sounds that woke him up from sleep where incoherent at first, but later became clear. They were sinful sounds of moans coming from the adjourning room. Soon, the sounds became louder and more disturbing. He could make out what seems like a clap of hands, or of flesh following the moans. It became more disturbing that he had to roll off his bed and move to the other extreme of the room. The walls on that extreme seems like someone was pounding on it. He listened again and kept hearing the same sounds. Then he heard the same sinful moans and sounds of flesh following the thumps on the wall.

Seems his two neighbors where at it.

Then he remembered the warning of his friend Obino. Is this what he was going to endure for the rest of his stay at Nairaland university? Only time will tell.

****End of Chapter 5 ***

lol nice one guys. Ishi you have craze finish

lol, am still following.... This is talent on display... I hope you guys just wont let the talents die, Nobel laureates in the making!

hahahaha Mazi Omenuko u be antelope!!

˚°◦hahahaha, this story Ȋ̝̊̅§ just hilarious... More beef by the minutes, make una nor fight o. Its just interesting anyway... BTW... Ijele-Igbo Ȋ̝̊̅§ supposed τ̅☺ ßε̲̣ an occupant ☀̤̣̈̇f SEXUALITY LODGE... I'm surprised he was omitted.

uj_sizzle: hahahaha Mazi Omenuko u be antelope!!

right now, you don't wanna mess with me. Else, when it gets to my turn next, you may find yourself at sexuality hostel sharing the same room with Mazi

This is hilarious. Mazi sent me ROTFL with d description given 2 Obaino. Carry go joor!!

xynerise:
190 and Idowuogbo have been dating for 3yrs without any positive outcome. They are having a frivolous relationship. Idowuogbo is the party type who enjoys clubbing every weekends. This doesnt bothers her boyfriend(190) because to him, Idowuogbo is like a friend with benefit.

That relationship must be that of cat and dog
Quite hilarious!

Heheheheheheheheh!! This is hilarious, Mazi you too much.....i can't help rolling on the floor with laughter. Next!!

I would have love to write, but my post will surely get hidden.

Honestly, great work and thread!
I for like join,but ehn.....
It would be great for SEUN to write a chapter too!

Guys are not smiling. My dear magma i'm very sorry for the mysterious sounds but if you can't beat them, join them. Lol . Display of talent, keep it up pals i'm following.

why does princii always glare and raise her fists at admirers? whats she feeling like sef...


foxy the rumor monger

myndd the ill tempered class captain

last post was so like the poster, trademark!

am so loving the stories

Nt too forget the bumpy slow opera mini ride we always go tru b4 arriving @ d uni.Lmao!Nice one guyz!

Nice one...... #Teamfollow

Nice one.Especially Ishilove's parts.ama follow dis thread like twitter

Nice one Mazi

The T.onto D.ikeh story must also be incorporated too. What is NL without Di.ckeh's to.to?

Inter-rest-in

mazi you try wella..

oboy see gossiping and branding of character to story writtin.guy as u no get work to do today come join me make we watch actor and artist of nairaland finish demselves wit talk.ishi na oyibo wey u go need dictionary,d other one na map and compass.d last one for now na ashaweee wit horse dii......ck.

Lol @ blue eyes.mazi, u no dey dissapoint. Thumbs up.