People get into heated debates about
how to purnish children. Should you
spank or use Time Out? Should you take
away privileges for a few days or should
you ground them more
weeks on end? How or if you purnish your child is an extremely personal
decision, but one that is necessary. No
parent wants to be seen as the bad guy,
but it is important to have a method to
deal with your child’s behavior when he
gets out of line. But before you get to the point when
need to apply punishment, you should
ask these 5 questions to make sure that
you address the situation in a loving
manner.

1. Have I established household rules
that are fair and reasonable?
As a parent, you must establish
boundaries and set expectations for
behaviour. Without clearly defined
household rules, children are prone to
go their own way and it's unfair to
punish them for doing something that they didn't know was inappropriate.
Your household rules need to be fair,
reasonable, and reflective of your belief
system. Once your rules are established,
you must explain the consequences for
breaking the rules. When kids understand the rules, expectations, and
consequences they are more apt to
adjust their behavior accordingly.

2.Does the behavior warrant
punishment?
Children makes mistake. Sometimes
they make a lot of mistakes. It is
unwise to punish children every time
they do something wrong. You must
use your wisdom and discernment to
determine which behaviors actually warrant punishment. If you punish
children for every discretion, the
punishment will lose it's desired effect.
Your kids need to understand that their
actions have consequences, but they
also need to know that you are willing to demonstrate forgiveness.

3. Is the punishment appropriate?
If you deem that punishment is the
appropriate response for your child's
infraction, you have to decide what is
appropriate. It's easy to overreact and
dole out a punishment that is too harsh.
On the flip side, you have to make sure that you aren't being too lenient or else
the punishment will be ineffective. You
must also keep in mind that each child
is different. What works for one child
may not work for another child.
Unreasonable punishments can lead to resentment.

4. Are my emotions under control? The worst thing a parent can do when
punishing a child is to react out of
anger. When you allow your anger to
control your behavior, you may do
things that you will letter regret -
things that could scar your child physically and emotionally. If your child
misbehaves in a way that deserves
punishment, take some time to allow
your anger to subside before reacting.
Once your emotions are under control,
then you can respond to the offense with clarity and compassion.

5. What can my child learn from this
experience?
When children misbehave, parents
have the opportunity to teach valuable
life lessons about right and wrong,
repentance, and forgiveness. Don't get
so caught up in the punishment that
you fail to use the situation as a teachable moment.


www.babble.com/dad/5-questions-to-ask-before-punishing-your-child/

Very nice points.