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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? (2303 Views)
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What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 7:37pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
Why are incidences of perverse behavior, domestic violence and the murder of one's spouse and children seem to be escalating, among African immigrants in the Diaspora? Could it be that the stresses of immigration or culture shock be the cause...or...something else? Just this morning, a friend called to inform me that one of his cousin's friends has been jailed for prostituting out the 12-year old daughter of his Nigerian girlfriend. This child is now pregnant, by who knows, and the mother, a R.N., at the county hospital, is beside herself with grief and guilt. What's going on? America is viewed by some as the "great leveler"...but...are some of her basest/immoral behaviors influencing the behaviors of some Naija/African immigrants...behaviors that could and do place them smack dab in the crosshairs of the American justice system? What's going on? Are such behaviors already existent within such immigrants...but magnified by the so-called permissiveness of American society...good or bad... moral and immoral? Any thoughts? |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by coogar: 7:50pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
it's because africans in diaspora are losing their identity. they are not sure if they should hold on to their african roots or copy the african americans. it's everywhere, i am sure the africans in the UK are the same if not worse. 2 Likes |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 7:57pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
coogar: it's because africans in diaspora are losing their identity. they are not sure if they should hold on to their african roots or copy the african americans. it's everywhere, i am sure the africans in the UK are the same if not worse. Wow!!! You may be onto something! |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by Nobody: 8:05pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
zboyd: Could you please specify exactly which behavior or behaviors you're talking about. Because the only Nigerian you mentioned in this story are the RN and her daughter. Just want to be clear on what perverse behavior specifically you are trying to highlight in this story. Thanks. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by Caseless: 8:37pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
'if u are in rome, then, act like the romans' it is not even always about emulating ameicans, but africans, nigeria/nigerians to be specific, have overtaken america/americans in some of the so called 'american culture' if u look at the cases of human right violations which are common in nigeria. For example, are there; 1. Baby factories in the u.s? 2. Again, are there hideouts in the u.s where children under 12 yr undergo apprenticeship in prostitution? 3. Are children below 14 travelling to europe like africans(nigerians) do to italy through niger republic and libya? Even as environment contribute to how africans behave over there, we must not also forget that Our problem is inherent. No blame oyibo dem for everything...we get our own wahala too 2 Likes |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by Caseless: 8:46pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
zboyd:praaaa......he's still on the matter. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 8:46pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
ileobatojo: One...the murder of nine Nigerian nurses between the years of 2005 and 2008. Second...the stabbing of a 6-year old daughter, by her own father...a Kenyan. Third...the murder of a Kenyan wife and two of her children by the husband. Fourth...the case of Alexander Kinyua, who alledgedly killed an associate and ate some of his body parts. Such happenings are becoming more common among African immigrants. It's not uncommon, here in America. What's going on? |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by EnairatofroUK: 8:50pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
dis is a big problem in the nigerian community, i know women are more rebelious abroad but US is becoming the wife murdering capital God help us |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by EnairatofroUK: 8:58pm On Jul 28, 2013 |
coogar: it's because africans in diaspora are losing their identity. they are not sure if they should hold on to their african roots or copy the african americans. it's everywhere, i am sure the africans in the UK are the same if not worse. nooooo i disagree the uk is better, its all about boundaries, there are pple on thi thread dat will tell u they have never had a fight wit their spouse. i have, several times but the main thing is knowing my boundary, knowing wen to stop and cry or stop and sulk, and the apology will start rolling. u cannot stand shoulder to shoulder wit a man every time unless u can withstand a mans punch sisters know wen to stop!!! my two pence |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 1:40am On Jul 29, 2013 |
[b][/b] ileobatojo: Well...it depends on what YOU consider perverse (disturbing) behavior. per·verse /pərˈvərs/Adjective 1.(of a person or their actions) Showing a deliberate and obstinate desire to behave in a way that is unreasonable or unacceptable 2.Contrary to the accepted or expected standard or practice. Synonyms: vicious - perverse Why do YOU think nine Nigerian nurses were killed by their partners, between 2005 and 2008? Where YOU were raised, in Nigeria, how many times were such happenings "news of the day"? If such happenings were rare in your village...why is it that such happenings are becoming more and more common in the Diaspora? Such happenings aren't new in America...but in the Nigerian/African community...here in America...such happenings WERE rare...until a decade or so. Why? |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 1:45am On Jul 29, 2013 |
coogar: it's because africans in diaspora are losing their identity. they are not sure if they should hold on to their african roots or copy the african americans. it's everywhere, i am sure the africans in the UK are the same if not worse. Interesting perspective! And...I agree with your supposition that such behavior is not limited to America. Doesn't it make you wonder why? |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 1:49am On Jul 29, 2013 |
caseless: 'if u are in rome, then, act like the romans' Why do YOU think such things are happening? |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 2:01am On Jul 29, 2013 |
£&nairato&froUK: I agree. It's very disturbing! |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by Nobody: 2:52am On Jul 29, 2013 |
zboyd: [b][/b] I'm sorry I'm still not clear what perverse behaviors by Nigerians you are talking about specifically in that story your friend told you. I see nothing in there about anyone killing their partners so I'm having some difficulty following your train of thought. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by MrsChima(f): 2:57am On Jul 29, 2013 |
ileobatojo: He was speaking generally of all Africans in America and the criminal behaviors of all sort. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by SisiKill1: 3:10am On Jul 29, 2013 |
Ile, For me, what is more alarming than the high rate of the African Criminals is how quickly they learn...after all, the issues OP listed never ever ever happens in Nigeria. ..EVER! How do they do it...how are they able to discard the childlike innocence that can only be the result of living in a utopian nation like Nigeria to become beasts abroad?!! Very disturbing. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by MrsChima(f): 3:16am On Jul 29, 2013 |
Poster...please be honest with me. Are you professing that ALL African immigrants living in America NEVER had criminal and perverse thoughts nor actions PRIOR to immigration? The good ole Africans were wholesome and holy until they touched the American soil transformed into demon spawns? So if an American was to immigrate to Nigeria or Liberia and perform several perverse and criminal acts such as scamming, bombing, cutting off clitorises, marrying babies in diapers, and selling punny in public bathrooms for mush and flipflops. Would that be fair for that American to blame Nigeria or Liberia? No one can make you do anything you don't want to do unless by gunpoint and even that. I doubt an American force any of those Africans to commit crimes by gunpoint. Accept accountability and mature. 2 Likes |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by Nobody: 3:20am On Jul 29, 2013 |
Mrs.Chima: It seems so but his story does not seem to fit the narrative. He didn't say that the criminal in his story was Nigerian or African which is why I'm quite confused. He specified the nationality of the RN but not of the criminal. So I'm wondering if it's the woman and child he is accusing of perverse behavior or someone else. And if so, what perverse behavior from them exactly he is referring to. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by Nobody: 3:24am On Jul 29, 2013 |
Sisi_Kill: Ile, For me, what is more alarming than the high rate of the African Criminals is how quickly they learn...after all, the issues OP listed never ever ever happens in Nigeria. ..EVER! Lol! It must be white voodoo! It transforms perfect saints overnight into devil incarnates. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 3:55am On Jul 29, 2013 |
ileobatojo: Killing one's spouse is not the only perverse behavior cropping up in the Nigerian/African community. Some of the same base, immoral behaviors exhibited by some Americans are being copied by Nigerian/African immigrants and other immigrnts. So...is this another instance of: "When in Rome, do as the Romans do?" |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 4:03am On Jul 29, 2013 |
Sisi_Kill: Ile, For me, what is more alarming than the high rate of the African Criminals is how quickly they learn...after all, the issues OP listed never ever ever happens in Nigeria. ..EVER! Yes! Such things are VERY disturbing. And YES, such people DO learn quickly. What could it be that turns an African Prince into an African Despot? |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by MrsChima(f): 4:04am On Jul 29, 2013 |
ileobatojo: Got you. You know men aren't naturally great talkers. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by Nobody: 4:14am On Jul 29, 2013 |
Mrs.Chima: Lol. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 4:20am On Jul 29, 2013 |
Mrs.Chima: IMO..."scamming, bombing, cutting off clitorises, marrying babies in diapers, and selling punny in public bathrooms for mush and flipflops" does not equate to apousal murder. Such behavior is commonplace in American society, but what of the African immigrant communities aross America. Something is going very wrong in the African immigrant commmunity. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by khiaa(f): 6:13am On Jul 29, 2013 |
coogar: it's because africans in diaspora are losing their identity. they are not sure if they should hold on to their african roots or copy the african americans. it's everywhere, i am sure the africans in the UK are the same if not worse. What does a nigerian man living in america prostituting out his girlfriend's 12 year old daughter has to do with african americans? Your comment is a contradiction to most of the africans on this forum who live in america that are always saying they don't associate with us because according to them we are all uneducated ghetto trash and thugs. Now you are saying they want to copy us.lol That nigerian man was trash before he came to america. Put the blame where it belongs, on the guilty person. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by khiaa(f): 6:40am On Jul 29, 2013 |
ileobatojo: He is talking about Child Prostitution which is a horrible, horrible crime in america, so that man was doing that prior to leaving nigeria. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by Nobody: 9:07am On Jul 29, 2013 |
Sisi_Kill: Ile, For me, what is more alarming than the high rate of the African Criminals is how quickly they learn...after all, the issues OP listed never ever ever happens in Nigeria. ..EVER! |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by MrsChima(f): 12:52pm On Jul 29, 2013 |
zboyd: Are you fucking serious?!! Crime is a crime is a crime! Are you telling me that spousal murder is bad in America but not Africa? I don't even know why I have asked you to be honest when it is a known fact that African/Black/Colored folks are the most dishonest and pretentious group of all groups...hence being on the bottom of the totem pole. Keep making excuses for Africans while outsiders are steady raping and reaping what Mother Africa has to offer. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by MrsChima(f): 1:03pm On Jul 29, 2013 |
khiaa: Girl...you know they were holy before they came to America. The devil turned them into demon spawns and told them America is at fault BUT yet thousands every year leave their homeland to be associated with American demons! If you take anything nuts say seriously you will be nuttier than the nuts. I guess prostitution and wife beating in Nigeria is a holy thing to do until they immigrate to America. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 6:05pm On Jul 29, 2013 |
Mrs.Chima said: Poster...please be honest with me. "Of course! Honesty is always the best policy." Mrs.Chima said: Are you professing that ALL African immigrants living in America NEVER had criminal and perverse thoughts nor actions PRIOR to immigration? "How can I profess such a thing? I don't know each and every single African immigrant living in America to profess such a thing. What I am curious about is why such anti-social behavior seems to be escalating in Nigerian/African communities across America. Such behaviors aren't new in America, but from what I've observed, such behaviors are making inroads throughout the aforementioned communities." Mrs.Chima said: The good ole Africans were wholesome and holy until they touched the American soil transformed into demon spawns? "Sorry, but I don't know any good ole wholesome and holy Africans or...any other good ole wholesome and holy people...just those who pretend to be wholesome and holy...when it suits them. However, if such "Africans" never displayed demon spawn tendencies, before immigration, then why display them after immigration? Perhaps such "Africans'" demon spawn tendencies were in a dormant state, only to be awakened by the push and pull of immigration. Also, I've noticed that some Naija women seem to adjust better to immigration than some Naija men." Mrs.Chima said: So if an American was to immigrate to Nigeria or Liberia and perform several perverse and criminal acts such as scamming, bombing, cutting off clitorises, marrying babies in diapers, and selling punny in public bathrooms for mush and flipflops. Would that be fair for that American to blame Nigeria or Liberia? No one can make you do anything you don't want to do unless by gunpoint and even that. "I agree that no one can force you to do anything, generally speaking, of course. I also agree that one should not blame anyone or anything for their anti-social behavior. However, these "Africans", we are discussing, in most cases, do indeed blame America/Host Country for their lot in life, and, from what I've observed, are mostly male." Mrs.Chima said: I doubt an American force any of those Africans to commit crimes by gunpoint. "These "Africans" blame the cultural environment/s of America/Host Country, where they face a whole new confusing world which is not just black and white, but many shades of grey. Some go off the deep end, into a morass of immortality and depravity, the depths from which they may never ascend. Or could some of these "Africans" suffer from the stress of settling in America/Host Country? Sometimes stress can manifest itself through such things as depression, diminished self-esteem, suicidal thoughts, eating disorders, sexual disorders, substance abuse and domestic violence. And while America can't force these "Africans" to commit crimes by gunpoint...some "force" is leading these "Africans" down the wrong road. Why do they SNAP and not BEND?" Mrs.Chima said: Accept accountability and mature. "Easy for some...not easy for others...even at 50+." |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 6:14pm On Jul 29, 2013 |
ileobatojo: Friend that called is from Ghana. Sorry...left that out! Behavior: Child prostitution. |
Re: What Is Contributing To The Breakdown Of Some Naija/African Families In America? by zboyd: 6:18pm On Jul 29, 2013 |
zboyd: |
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