My friends mum is keen on knowing if she is dating a serious guy or not
she is dating a guy but afraid to disclose this to her since the guy is not from
her tribe but the Guy is damn serious and maybe visiting her parents this december
please help me let me help my friend .
She has assured the guy theirs no problem is just for her to tell the mum
which is the best approach?

she should tell her mom now and see her respond instead embrassing the guy when he eventually comes, SIMPLE

MOM, am dating some1 datz very serious and wants to marry me. he is igbo, yoruba or wuteva da case maybe . the mom will den reply and if itz not wat shez expecting, den they can debate on it

How old is your friend, what is she doing now, i mean is she still in school? or working? If schooling what is her level of education? Had she ever had any relationship before, if yes, did her parent aware of such relationships. This are necessary to enable us aprise the situation very well. But for now, I want to agree with Hotstepper.

Being that I am a Black American, I may sound ignorant in this question, but how important and why is it so important that you stay within your tribe? You can't find true love in another tribe, etc?

Also by my being American, does that mean I wouldn't be accepted by the parents of my friend if he was Nigerian, because I am not from the same tribe?

Just asking to get a better understanding.

@SweetNess its almost the sme as if you would come home with a white guy

@mama, thanks. I understood as soon as you put it out there. But I would feel horrible to love someone from a tribe being Black American and not be accepted by his parents. But I guess that's life.

@twintaiye she is working and has been in relationships
but the are not as serious as this one
Hope this will help

Tell your friend to tell her mum now, the earlier she said No, the better for you guys to employ other means to let her see reasons. Since she is a working class, I want to believe she is ripe for marriage, so the situation where the parent will based their objection on her finishing her studies is no more there. A woman's ripe for marriage is very seasonal, this is her chance, you need to be aggressive with it. Armed with different types of people who will make her see reasons should in case she said NO. I wish you and your friend best of luck.

thanks@twinstaiye

Sweet,
i can imagine the way u feel , but like u said it's life, in ur locality, it's either u are black or u are white, but remember evn the white might frown at marriage to those in from the middle east. it has to do with religious beliefs, way of life etc amongst others,
hope that helps a bit.

Chy,
i very much agree with Twinstaye, the earlier u tell her mother the better.Time is more unfair to the woman.tell the mother early, so that u get the "no" early.
You guys could even go see someone she respects and listens to (say an elderly person), tell that person, convince that person, You might even eventually take the guy to that person.
this elder can even talk to her mother before you guys.

mind you if the mother says no!, tell her not to be rude about it,
let her not to be proving that she's old enough to decide bla bla bla,
u have to be diplomatic about it,
and surprisingly, the mother could okay the relationship.

OUR PARENTS.ESPECIALLY MOTHERS KNOW MORE THAN WE DO
THEY WANT THE BEST FOR US,
SHE WANTS THE BEST FOR HER.

he should try and be himself.


but nt the bad part.

Ur friend should know Wat her mum likes in a man that would like to marry her daughter

I agree with edatika, you guys should seek someone her mother respects who you believe has a libral mind; This person might volunteer to speak to her mum, from then on I want to believe it will be smooth ( I PRAY SO!).

However, if one is to look at it from the very extreme radicalist point, She can take in fro the guy if she is sure he is the one she is willing to spend the rest of her life with. ( I stand Accused!)

Tell her mum, before inviting the guy home

Tell her mum, before inviting the guy home

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