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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues (5869 Views)
My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. / Help.. My 4 Years Old Marriage Is Gradually Crashing Out. / Women! Please Stay With Your Husbands: (2) (3) (4)
I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by YOMITEWIN(m): 9:33am On Oct 18, 2013 |
Gud mawnin NLders, jst want 2 share d present problem am going thru wit my relatives i.e My uncle am stayin wit. My. Uncle got married in 2010, The lady he got married to is the very Lazy type, All she does in the house is to cook, I wash my Uncle clothes, iron them, make sure the House is clean, Fetch water for them to Use. There was a time my Uncle asked me to wash his wife blouse dat was in March 2011 but I refused to wash it, he asked me y I refused to wash it. I told him boldy dat y will I wash your wife's blouse, He now said so I can eat her food she cook but I can wash her wifes blouse, I got so angry dat I left the house to hang around with my friends,So I stop eating in d house, and all dis continue til dis moment Now, they are relocating to their own apartment, so my uncle impression was that I will relocate with dem to their own apartment. So they told me by Dec, they are leaving, so with Immediate effect I told dem am not going with dem dat I dnt mind getting a room for myself to start a life. He said he doesn't want me to rent a room for myself, dat is nt good, he said I won't move forward wit a room, he said I should pay for d rented apartment he is staying 4 a year and I went ahead and pay for d 2 bedroom flat. Upon d payment I made am still going thru dis and very soon dey wil be leaving for their own apartment, and I don't av money 2 pay for dat 2 bedroom apartment, cos he left all d properties in dere with me,Nlders, I need ur advice Pls wat should I do in dis case. Thanks |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 9:43am On Oct 18, 2013 |
I don't understand . . . what is the problem here 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by homesteady(m): 9:52am On Oct 18, 2013 |
Please can you explain more? |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by dominique(f): 10:11am On Oct 18, 2013 |
I'm not geting your story at all. Did you say you paid for the apartment your uncle is about to move out of? Its not your uncle that will decide what kind of home you live in. You cut your coat according to your cloth. If your uncle doesn't want you living in a one bedroom apartment, he should continue paying for the apartment you're staying in. If you can't maintain the apartment, move out and move on to somethung you can afford. Who says yoi can't become a landlord in future because you live in a one room apartment? 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Tinkybabe(f): 10:13am On Oct 18, 2013 |
If you cannot afford to live in the apartment,move to a less expensive one . 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by bellong: 10:37am On Oct 18, 2013 |
How old are you? Do you have a job that caters for your personal needs? Aside from the problem with your uncle's wife, do you have a good relationship with your uncle? How about your parents? How do you intend paying the subsequent rent when this expires? How is your relationship with your uncle's wife like? |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by YOMITEWIN(m): 10:50am On Oct 18, 2013 |
@bellong my uncle use to b very close but ever since I my uncle asked me to wash his wife blouse I choose to give myself some distance frm dem, weneva I com bak frm work I would just go straight to my room, they wil b in d sittin room gisting but I wil jst greet them and pass dem by 2ndly, I am working with a multinational company under a contract staff but praying and hoping I wil join d management staff soon. |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 11:00am On Oct 18, 2013 |
Work on ur pride first. Highly irritating. 3 Likes |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by YOMITEWIN(m): 11:06am On Oct 18, 2013 |
@yellowpawpaw To God who made me, I dnt have pride, am very Humble, just because I reject washing my uncle's wife blouse doesn't mean I have pride. I've been staying with dem for good 4 years and I do evrytin dey ask me to do, I do evrytin am asked to do. So get dat sire. 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by omoseun(f): 11:19am On Oct 18, 2013 |
@OP, from what you wrote and explained, 2 bedroom flat is too expensive for you now, why don't you explain to your Uncle and let him reason with you, just try and rent a mini flat in a decent area. As per your uncle's wife, it won't kill you to help her wash her cloth (although I'm sure I can't do such a thing), it's all just for a while at least till they move to their own house. I wish you all the best!!!!! |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by YOMITEWIN(m): 11:24am On Oct 18, 2013 |
Thnks omoseun |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by bellong: 11:40am On Oct 18, 2013 |
YOMITEWIN: @bellong my uncle use to b very close but ever since I my uncle asked me to wash his wife blouse I choose to give myself some distance frm dem, weneva I com bak frm work I would just go straight to my room, they wil b in d sittin room gisting but I wil jst greet them and pass dem by 2ndly, I am working with a multinational company under a contract staff but praying and hoping I wil join d management staff soon. It means your uncle did not hold any grudge with you for turning down the request of washing his wife's blouse. I will not rebuke you for turning down the request. Except she was sick, I see no reason why he told you to wash his wife's blouse. Though its not a big deal if you washed it. Your action was neither right nor wrong except we understand the circumstances it happened. For you to be working, it means you are old enough to take decision. You alone understand what you can afford to pay and sustain. Maybe your uncle is already thinking ahead of when you will marry, his suggestion for taking the 2 bedroom apartment. If you can't sustain the payment for now, let him understand what you want and go for what you can afford. |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by YOMITEWIN(m): 11:47am On Oct 18, 2013 |
Tnks bellong |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 12:11pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
I av been staying wit my uncle too for like 2yrs_plus i du evrytin dey ask mi tu du buh in my own case i dnt fetch water deriz water runing into our flat he brings cloth for mi to wash i'll wash it happily buh d wife av neva bring her cloths for mi to wash even if 2moro she does it i will gladly wash it for her deriz no biggie in doing dat afterall dey are doing us a favour op u not gona live wit dem for ever @op i tink u are arrogant and sturborn for aving the goths to look ur own uncle in the face and tell him u wont du wat he ask u to du #norespect mayb ur uncle might be in hz early or late 20's or mayb d fault myt b from him he might av brought his-self so low to u not like mine not asif i dnt av d money to rent my own apartment nah just staying wit dem save and plan verry well so life wont b difficult wen i finally move awt op because u just got 200k or so u tink uv arrived just work on ur pride and stop been arrogant 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Haywhymido(m): 12:30pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
yellowpawpaw: Work on ur pride first.u r ok at all U r telling him to wash his brother's wife blouse.Dat i can't do in dis life or d nxt.Rubbish.I sure none of my brodas will tell me to wash his wife's blouse. Smal tym frm blouse to pants n bra. Lasy smelling a.s.s. If my wife is sick i will rather wash her blouse dan giv it to my younger broda. Such disgusting attitude. So because we r feeding n accommodating my broda he shd start washing her cloths,Dia r oda things he can do 4 us in d house.if my sister stays wit us she can do dat for her but my broda hell N0. 4 Likes |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by YOMITEWIN(m): 1:04pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
Did u just say am arrogant with wat am doing in d house, after paying for d house rent which dey are staying, and am still doing d household chores u call dat arrogant! 30DB4FA6: I av been staying wit my uncle too for like 2yrs_plus i du evrytin dey ask mi tu du buh in my own case i dnt fetch water deriz water runing into our flat he brings cloth for mi to wash i'll wash it happily buh d wife av neva bring her cloths for mi to wash even if 2moro she does it i will gladly wash it for her deriz no biggie in doing dat afterall dey are doing us a favour op u not gona live wit dem for ever @op i tink u are arrogant and sturborn for aving the goths to look ur own uncle in the face and tell him u wont du wat he ask u to du #norespect mayb ur uncle might be in hz early or late 20's or mayb d fault myt b from him he might av brought his-self so low to u not like mine not asif i dnt av d money to rent my own apartment nah just staying wit dem save and plan verry well so life wont b difficult wen i finally move awt op because u just got 200k or so u tink uv arrived just work on ur pride and stop been arrogant |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by dominique(f): 1:42pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
yellowpawpaw: Work on ur pride first. What about his posts suggests pride? He refused to wash his brothers wife's clothes. One of my personal idealogy about life is, what you can't eat, don't taste it, don't even sniff it. That they're puting a roof over his head doesn't give them the right to give him that kind of deameaning responsibility. After washing her blouses, what comes next? Her undies? This is a grown man we're talking about my dear not a little boy. I totally support the way he refused to wash the blouse |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by dominique(f): 1:54pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
Haywhymido: u r ok at all U r telling him to wash his brother's wife blouse.Dat i can't do in dis life or d nxt.Rubbish.I sure none of my brodas will tell me to wash his wife's blouse. Smal tym frm blouse to pants n bra. Lasy smelling a.s.s. If my wife is sick i will rather wash her blouse dan giv it to my younger broda. Such disgusting attitude. So because we r feeding n accommodating my broda he shd start washing her cloths,Dia r oda things he can do 4 us in d house.if my sister stays wit us she can do dat for her but my broda hell N0. Lol, I've replied her before scrolling to this reply. (From her posts) She strikes me as a kind of person that expect you to lick the ground she walks on just because she's 'helping you'. I run away from people like that in the real world. |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by nicky4lif(f): 2:42pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
Wash her clothes for what na?was she in the hospital?this has nothing to do with pride.nd to even think he is a guy,I thought it was a girl.even,he is trying by doing all the things he is doing,if the wife has her way she will leave the cooking for the guy to do,hope she sweeps nd arranges her room after making love with her husband?so after she scatters his head in the bed room with love,he still doesn't think stright when he is out?well I think u shld behave the way u were behaving,u cautioned him when passed his limit nd that shld be all.get a room for urself,4get what he said that u wldnt make it or think big if u are staying in one room,everything in this life is about stages.when u pass oneroom,u will know,ur account will even tell u,is even when u continue to stay with them that u wldnt move 4word in life cos u wld want everything to be done for u.so my advice for is,get a room for urself nd for the mian time u are still with them,behave fine. 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 3:01pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
Haywhymido: u r ok at all U r telling him to wash his brother's wife blouse.Dat i can't do in dis life or d nxt.Rubbish.I sure none of my brodas will tell me to wash his wife's blouse. Smal tym frm blouse to pants n bra. Lasy smelling a.s.s. If my wife is sick i will rather wash her blouse dan giv it to my younger broda. Such disgusting attitude. So because we r feeding n accommodating my broda he shd start washing her cloths,Dia r oda things he can do 4 us in d house.if my sister stays wit us she can do dat for her but my broda hell N0.U can write ur trash for all I care, but poster has a pride issue for walking out on his uncle. I hope if someone younger does that to him, he will not grumble. It is very disrespectful of him whether its the wife's cloth that caused it or not. The rest of the story, not my biz. Everybody is entitled to his or her opinion, u don't like mine, I don't blooooody care. |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 3:04pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
dominique:U don't like my posts, u can hug a transformer for all I care. And in real life, I don't think our ways will ever cross so don't bother running away. Nansense! |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by nicky4lif(f): 3:08pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
Well,I don't think there is a place the OP made mention of walking out on him,he only said he wasn't going to wash it. yellowpawpaw: |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 3:24pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
YOMITEWIN: @yellowpawpaw To God who made me, I dnt have pride, am very Humble, just because I reject washing my uncle's wife blouse doesn't mean I have pride. I've been staying with dem for good 4 years and I do evrytin dey ask me to do, I do evrytin am asked to do. So get dat sire.My problem with ur post is u walking away on ur uncle. Whether u r the one paying the house rent or not is not my problem or he told u to wash d wife's dress but its very disrespectful of u to walk away on him. I'm quite sure u will accept it if a younger one staying with u does that. From march 2011 till now, u don't eat in ur uncle's house yet u live there bc u and him had a misunderstanding? Ok o. |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by olushowunm(m): 3:29pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
Wash the blouse and wait for their children too... Everything is in cycle my brother... For there is nothing new under the sun... Eccl. 1:4-20. |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 3:31pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
nicky4lif: Well,I don't think there is a place the OP made mention of walking out on him,he only said he wasn't going to wash it. Op said he was very angry that he left to hang out with friends and since then he has stopd eating their food. Since 2011 and yet he lives with them. Whatever that happened btw then isn't my concern but what I just typed up there. We r always very quick to jump to conclusions. Like I said, everybody is entitled to his own opinion. 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by YOMITEWIN(m): 3:32pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
@yellowpawpaw, are u nut? Can't u get this straight in2 your head, someone is giving me an order to help him wash his wife clothes. And as 4 me not eating their food in the house if I should start eating, I might be given an order to wash her panties and bra! #@yellowpawpaw#Baddest fool ever Liveth yellowpawpaw: 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 3:44pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
YOMITEWIN: @yellowpawpaw, are u nut? Can't u get this straight in2 your head, someone is giving me an order to help him wash his wife clothes. And as 4 me not eating their food in the house if I should start eating, I might be given an order to wash her panties and bra! #@yellowpawpaw#Baddest fool ever LivethWhy r u still living with that someone that was giving u order? Why didn't u pack out? Bc u r contributing to their upkeep? U r the one calling the shoots? Assuming ur uncle is very well positioned, will u behave like that? Will u walk away? Will u still be in their house without eating their food? Was it a previous arrangement? Man, work on ur ego. Going baillistic on me won't help cos I will tell u d truth and I don't reall care an iota. U r too proud. Bc u feel u r working in a multinational company so heaven and earth will just freeze. I'm very sure if u don't hv any form of income and ur not so well uncle is supporting u, u wouldn't hv done what u did. God forbid me supporting evil cos I wanna be cyber darling! 2 Likes |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by bellong: 3:49pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
YOMITEWIN: @yellowpawpaw, are u nut? Can't u get this straight in2 your head, someone is giving me an order to help him wash his wife clothes. And as 4 me not eating their food in the house if I should start eating, I might be given an order to wash her panties and bra! #@yellowpawpaw#Baddest fool ever Liveth This is a very wrong attitude you are displaying here. If someone does not agree with your opinion, it is not enough to insult the person. You have taken it too far, grow up and act above petty insults. 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 3:56pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
30DB4FA6: I av been staying wit my uncle too for like 2yrs_plus i du evrytin dey ask mi tu du buh in my own case i dnt fetch water deriz water runing into our flat he brings cloth for mi to wash i'll wash it happily buh d wife av neva bring her cloths for mi to wash even if 2moro she does it i will gladly wash it for her deriz no biggie in doing dat afterall dey are doing us a favour op u not gona live wit dem for ever @op i tink u are arrogant and sturborn for aving the goths to look ur own uncle in the face and tell him u wont du wat he ask u to du #norespect mayb ur uncle might be in hz early or late 20's or mayb d fault myt b from him he might av brought his-self so low to u not like mine not asif i dnt av d money to rent my own apartment nah just staying wit dem save and plan verry well so life wont b difficult wen i finally move awt op because u just got 200k or so u tink uv arrived just work on ur pride and stop been arrogantThank u my dear, I tot I was the only one that saw the pride thing. Bc its a woman's dress, everybody want to hug transformer. He really has a very good uncle. Even after that he don't eat with them again cos he don't want anybody to send him to wash pant and bra. And he feels there r no other way to communicate his feelings than walking away? Then stopd eating for almost two yrs in their house. 1 Like |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by YOMITEWIN(m): 4:04pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
yellowpawpaw:I can't blame u, cos u were not in my shoes, Incase u dnt know, when all dis happened, am still busy searching 4 work. If he asked me to leave his house I will definetly leave. My mom doesn't know all dis tins are happening, evrytime she ask me yomi are u ok! I wil tell her yea am fine! Am not an arrogant person, walking out of my uncles doesn't shows am arrogant. I guess u nid 2 check d word arrogant very well on ur dico |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by Nobody: 4:18pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
YOMITEWIN: I can't blame u, cos u were not in my shoes, Incase u dnt know, when all dis happened, am still busy searching 4 work. If he asked me to leave his house I will definetly leave. My mom doesn't know all dis tins are happening, evrytime she ask me yomi are u ok! I wil tell her yea am fine! Am not an arrogant person, walking out of my uncles doesn't shows am arrogant. I guess u nid 2 check d word arrogant very well on ur dico Why r u telling me this? To stop me from saying u were arrogant? The truth hurts doesn't it? I will still tell u more. Go and apologise to ur uncle for walking out on him and bodly telling him u can't wash his wife's dress in his face. That is very disrespectful of u and guess what, though ur uncle from what I c here is a very good man, chances r he is not happy with u but as he is tied to his obligation he has to stomach it and I must commend him for doing so. Even u won't do what he did. Before they go to their apartment, call him and the wife and apologise for what u did. U did wrong and I will not sugarcoat it. There r many ways to air ur displeasure but def not walking out and rejecting their food. I hope u r wise enof to heed counsel. As for ur rant, this is normal. Its nairaland trademark. |
Re: I Stay With My Uncle For 4 Years But Am Having Issues by nicky4lif(f): 4:27pm On Oct 18, 2013 |
Well if u walked out on him its wrong nd he also has no right to bring his wife's clothes.anybody that supports ur uncle is also doing it.from there u will start washing her panties nd bra(when he can put her in the wife as his wife),u shldnt even wash ur uncle boxes not cos u are too big to do that for ur uncle but cos its the wife's duty to do that,what if there are some left over on the boxes? YOMITEWIN: I can't blame u, cos u were not in my shoes, Incase u dnt know, when all dis happened, am still busy searching 4 work. If he asked me to leave his house I will definetly leave. My mom doesn't know all dis tins are happening, evrytime she ask me yomi are u ok! I wil tell her yea am fine! Am not an arrogant person, walking out of my uncles doesn't shows am arrogant. I guess u nid 2 check d word arrogant very well on ur dico |
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