A desperately lonely man who was unable to find a girlfriend decided he had no more use for his penis — and proceeded to cut it off.

Yang Hu, 26, from the eastern Chinese province of Zhejiang, had been battling depression over his inability to find love when he made the decision to slice off his manhood this past Sunday night after work.

Friends of Yang said the long hours he had been putting in at a local clothing factory convinced the man he would never find the time to meet a woman.

Hoping to curb his desire for a partner and believing his penis to be useless, Yang made the fateful truncation, only to quickly regret it.

He reportedly grabbed his bicycle and rode to a nearby hospital, but soon realized he had left his missing member at home.

He cycled back to retrieve it, but by the time he returned to the hospital it was too late.

Yang's friends blamed the hospital for literally adding insult to injury by failing to send an ambulance to collect Yang's personal belongings in lieu of telling him to go ride a bike.
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so hilarious