BTW TINUBU AND NGIGE

Tinubu:-- Chris. Chris. Chris, how many times I call U?

Ngige:- Asiwaju, good evening baba.

Tinubu: - don't good evening me, what is a good about the evening? U didn't efen carry 2nd. 3rd loun loun--- haaaa Ngigeeee

Ngige:- Asiwaju, emm emm--biko'nu, U know this boy Peter, he really use incumbency power o, even for my vvv--

Tinubu:- Shut up'u. Shut up. Which incumbency?-- I gave U 35bil. 35billionnnn Chris-- o ya were ni? Are U a mad ni?

Ngige:- Asiwaju, nooooo, na 25bil

Tinubu--- koni da fun'e. Chris e no go beta for U -----Fashola- 5bil, Fayemi-3bil, Aregbesola-3bil, Adams- 5bil, Amosun- 3bil. Ajimobi- 3bil. Buhari and co- 3bil
How much is that? U think Asiwaju Private Company get money to dey waste?

Chris:- but Asiwaju that na 25bil na

Tinubu;- haaa-- oloshi, according to APC arithmetic, that is 35bil.
Chris, U are useless o-- we gave U 180 mercenaries, 100,000 fake voters card, 300 election observer's card. Plus 35bil-- yet U carry 3rd-- haa-- U are uselesss

Chris: "stammering"-- U know they arrested the boys na. And , Asiwaju, its 25bil o

Tinubu;- shut up'u-- shut'upp--- see Chris, let me just tell U , wetin Ubah use ur eye see that time na small, if U don't return our money, wa'gbaa-- U will know say, I Jagaban no dey play with money. 35billionuuu--
U kuku know how to do juju well well, so beta go do the juju and refund our money, if nottt

Ngige;- but Asiwaju, we are going to court na, we will reject the result, I have plans

Tinubu;-- Ori mi'o-- Chris, U are still talking of court, U wey carry 3rd, wetin make Nwoye do? U are completely mad- o ti ya were pata-pata-- who will finance the case.? Idiot, I say are useless

Ngige; - baba no do like that na, but I'm still useful o, when Oga Buhari become president, I can be minister of Finance, so U can have access to the em emm national cake

Tinubu-- haa, now I know U are mad, in fact U are crazy, oloshiii-- so U think say Buhari or any of this aboki go become president, U are a Learner--mtcheww

Ngige;- but- U are-----

Tinubu:- shut up, U are what? They are my bargaining maga-- when time reach, I will dump them as I dump Ribadu in 2011-- U dey craze? U no know politics?
Why am I even talking to U? See me in Bourdillon. Noww
#hangs fone

Ngige:-- Asiwaju, Asiwaju-- hello, hello--
Mtchewww--- this man na agbero'oo-- chei-- he too like gragra--
Make I call Rochas jare, all this Yoruba people sef..


Phone Converstaion between Fashola and Ngige*******

Ngige:- *in sober mood--- picks his fone- calls Fashola*
***
Fashola:- haa,, hello Chief Chris Ngi-

Ngige:- *cuts him short*-- Nna, hol am there-- mechunu--- o'boy, U see wetin ur gragra don cost me, nna U see urself?
U go dey deport my people comot for ur state. U dis onyiara- onyioshi-- onyiberiberi

Fashola-- chief, what's wrong? Relax, there are systematic Judicial legal processes we can embark on to help reclaim your stolen mandate, you know I'm a SAN, I will personally---

Ngige:- *cuts him short* Nna, Mechunuuu--- Nna, U dey craze? Na only U go school? U know law na hin U deport Nigerians for Nigeria? Becos I no talk that time?

Fashola:- but Chief, I apologized, it was all over the news, they even--

Ngige:- Sharappp there-- U this isiewu, U this arrogant bombastic agronomical eccentric bacteria nomenclature

Fashola:- but chief, U can just call me on my phone and insult me, I gave U 5bil for your campaign moreover I am Gov Babatunde Raji Fasola (SAN) senior advocate of--

Nigige:- sharappp--- Senior Advocate of Nonsense-- yes-- U-- Chineke. Why una APC dey like this na? Whyyy?

Fashola:- o'boy- no do gragra 4 me o, becos I dey talk grammar, I be isale eko boy o,- wetin na? Afterall, dem say U no move 1 motion since U enta senate-- say U be-

Ngige:-- cheiiii---- so U dey insult me bah? Me, Ngigi, the obolopalo of Okija shrine, wen I 1st chop gov U be ordinary chief of--

Phone goes off--

Ngige:-- Fashola, hello, hello, Raji-- cheiii--- I don sufferrrr--- this Yoruba people af finish me-

U don kill me wit laff i swear

Too funny