Dearest yoruba brothers and sisters, what happened to our children and future generation born and bred abroad? They are unruly, disrespectful and very wild. Those qualities are never seen in Yoruba culture and are detested to the highest order. Can we make suggestions here on how to solve these problems starting from tutoring their parents/parent.

My suggestions are:

1) If you live abroad, reduce your bills to a considerate level and make out more time to stay with your kids while speaking YORUBA to them at home. They'll always speak "phone" english as long as they live and school in America.


2) If you are divorced or a single mother, please try as much as possible to send your SON/S home to do their high school education, that way they'll learn some respect especially how to respect women.

3)Liase them with every Yoruba social/cultural group around you to help them know each other. Ibo people do that a lot, that's why they marry each other more here. You cannot operate easily without your people, the Asian will always resort to marry fellow Asian, same with latino, white, carribean etc and they always leave their chaff for you to take.

4) Yoruba groups/socialites, make sure you make your various meetings, parties etc attrtactive enough so these kids can look up to you . All the bickering and fighting should be put aside in their presence.

Funmi, your brain needs to be shampooed.

Um if anything Yoruba children are MORE likely to still speak their language aboard than any other tribe.

Also there's quite a surge of Yourba/Igbo intertribal marriages esp aboard so im confused

Um if anything Yoruba children are MORE likely to still speak their language aboard than any other tribe.

Also there's quite a surge of Yourba/Igbo intertribal marriages esp aboard so im confused

Am not even talking about marriage. I'm talking about the general behavioral characteristics of these kids. Mind you other tribes like Ibo, Benin etc are involved but I'm just looking out for my own(they should take care of their own problem). Most of these kids are very unruly and disrespectful. You and I know that in yorubaland, even if an elder offends you, he/she is not expected to apologize to you, rather, it's you that will prostrate and apologize for being offended. Our ancestors knew why they made it that way because they were very very smart, it gives kids a sense of respect and honor and everything in life sorrrounds around it. Most parents living out here fixated their minds on dollar so much that they've forgotten their primary responsibility. My happiness is that this generation here is not even 1/40 of the yoruba generation at home doing their thing.

Um if anything Yoruba children are MORE likely to still speak their language aboard than any other tribe.

Again, how did you arrive at this statistics? The only factual tale here is , some yoruba kids born abroad speak their mother tongue just like some Benin kids or hausa kids or ibo kids(putting their population ratio into perspective). You cannot claim that ibo kids born here speak their language more than Benin kids because their population ratio are not the same besides, an ibo person knows more ibo people than other tribes. Same goes for other tribes. So the issue is not how many that speak because it cannot be ascertained but how can you alleviate the issue of the non speakers and make them identify with you the more.

I mentioned marriage cos of this

Liase them with every Yoruba social/cultural group around you to help them know each other. Ibo people do that a lot,that's why they marry each other more here

I agree with some of what you wrote but I and others have always found the whole "apologizing to those who OFFEND YOU" to be wrong. Doesnt give you self worth. Of course when I offend my parents, I apologize immediately but when they offend me they do the same, of course that started to happen when I got older.
Im not syaing kids or whoemever should go around screaming and looking for apologies but for elders to believe they are above apologies esp if they are DEFINITELY in the wrong is well. . .wrong. You dont have to be old to be respected.
It's one thing if whatever was done was done cos eventually it will show that the ends justify the means but when the act was just done for their own benefit then there's a problem.

anyway s this cos of the "my son is a lion" thing?

DeepZone:

arrive at this statistics? The only factual tale here is , some yoruba kids born abroad speak their mother tongue just like some Benin kids or hausa kids or ibo kids(putting their population ratio into perspective). You cannot claim that ibo kids born here speak their language more than Benin kids because their population ratio are not the same besides, an ibo person knows more ibo people than other tribes. Same goes for other tribes. So the issue is not how many that speak because it cannot be ascertained but how can you alleviate the issue of the non speakers and make them identify with you the more.

I know cos the Igbos I know and even the one here who live aboard complain about how the "generation of now" have forsaken their language or going as far as pretending that they cant speak it and go as far as comparing the plight to the Yorubas here.

take your kids back home. Let them learn their father's language.
What in the event your spouse isnt Nigerian? Would your kids then be forced to learn your language? Just a hypothetical question i was wondering about.

They can learn both David. There were quite a number of half Romanian and Russian kids in my school. They could speak both parents languages. It's not that hard to do if you start them from young

Best thing my parens ever did was send us to Naija for secondary cos I sincerely hated being here around that time.

take your kids back home. Let them learn their father's language.

Good; Not only their language but the culture and general responsibility.

[b]What in the event your spouse isnt Nigeria[/b]n? Would your kids then be forced to learn your language? Just a hypothetical question i was wondering about.

That's a big problem and the issue of taking them back home or even teaching them your culture may be out of the question. Although, children born by interethnic couples like ibo+yoruba end up speaking their mother's tongue if they live in a [b]neutral [/b]environment.

I'm strongly for taking my kids back home for a couple of years. I broached the subject with my mum sometime ago but she didnt seem too in favour of the idea. If my wife is fine with it then i think its the best way to give them a proper grounding in a culture they can readily identify with.

I can't imagine raising a kid here who doesnt know where Lagos is on the map.

Why was your mom against it?

For once a helpful topic not aimed at men!

didn't know you had it in you girl

Solutions?

More hands on approach by parents. Too much is simply left to peer groups, schools, TV, Internet and the rest. If you imbibe your good values into your children, then they will grow up with them. Even if they don't value those things immediately, they'll value them later.

Not to burst your bubble, but a lot of the same is being replicated at home too - na so so English everywhere and no Yoruba for a lot of kids. All in an attempt to appear 'educated'.

I know because the Igbos I know and even the one here who live aboard complain about how the "generation of now" have forsaken their language or going as far as pretending that they can't speak it and go as far as comparing the plight to the Yorubas here.

same thing yorubas complain. Thank god you said the ibos YOU KNOW and what about other tribes like Efik,Ibibio,hausa,itsekiri etc. I don't know where you live but generally, the yorubas are higher in population than Ibos in the UK(London and Liverpool to be precise), so, you should have more kids speaking my mother tongue than the ibo kids but the vice versa is the case here(seems my people no really like hanging out here) . I've lived in Nebraska, Buffalo,Pittsburgh and Germantown and I can tell you categorically that ibos outnumber yorubas in those towns but you'll not know unless you come out from your own clique. same I heard in Chicago, Houston,Dallas and LA. So, will you conclude that ibos speak more of their mother tongues in these states i mentioned because of their diverse population?

For once a helpful topic not aimed at men! Kiss Kiss Kiss

didn't know you had it in you girl

My next topic will specifically target your azz.

More hands on approach by parents. Too much is simply left to peer groups, schools, TV, Internet and the rest. If you imbibe your good values into your children, then they will grow up with them. Even if they don't value those things immediately, they'll value them later.

The love of Dollar will kill Nigerian people here.

Not to burst your bubble, but a lot of the same is being replicated at home too - na so so English everywhere and no Yoruba for a lot of kids. All in an attempt to appear 'educated'.

Even at home? i think the federal govt should target the media and force them to re orientate these parents and their kids . Osun pride!!!!

when I say the ones here, here is referring to Nairaland, funmi

as for the ones I know, I live in NY so we have a decent size of the Igbo community.

as for Ibibo, plenty of threads with them syaing their language is dying out because kids of now think it's "razz" and "local" so they refus eto learn or speak it.

lol@ debo. If the English was even correctly used at least it wouldnt be such a dilemma, Ironically it's not.

KarmaMod:

Why was your mom against it?

She doesnt like the idea of kids living away from their parents. To be honest i dont either . . . but it wont hurt to get the kids to spend at least their secondary school education in Nigerian boarding schools.

debosky:

Not to burst your bubble, but a lot of the same is being replicated at home too - na so so English everywhere and no Yoruba for a lot of kids. All in an attempt to appear 'educated'.

Its not always the case. I didnt learn to speak proper yoruba until i was about 10yrs old. My mom is igbo so my father never spoke yoruba ini the house and made sure everyone else spoke English so my mom didnt feel left out.
In hindsight i even wish i had learnt at least to speak igbo too.

When u're growing up there's the tendency, like Debo said, to assume ur not being able to speak a nigerian language is "Behind".

davidylan:

She doesnt like the idea of kids living away from their parents. To be honest i don't either . . . but it wont hurt to get the kids to spend at least their secondary school education in Nigerian boarding schools.

Ok I WAS with you until you mentioned boarding school

God Forbid.

KarmaMod:

Ok I WAS with you until you mentioned boarding school

God Forbid.

why not? Where else would the kids live?

Family!

Boarding house ke? Nooo.

when I say the ones here, here is referring to Nairaland, funmi

as for the ones I know, I live in NY so we have a decent size of the Igbo community.

as for Ibibo, plenty of threads with them syaing their language is dying out because kids of now think it's "razz" and "local" so they refus eto learn or speak it.

Girl, don't believe everything you read online because some of these people whining about Ibibios or Efiks are not even one.

Its not always the case. I didnt learn to speak proper yoruba until i was about 10yrs old. My mom is igbo so my father never spoke yoruba ini the house and made sure everyone else spoke English so my mom didnt feel left out.

Well, your statement flawed my hypothesis although environment may be a factor. Had it been you grew up in Egypt for example, you are more likely to speak ibo than yoruba because your mom is ibo. Men are so poor in transferring their mother tongue to their kids. I still believe you should be able to at least understand ibo unless your mother alienated herself from her relatives.

KarmaMod:

Family!

Boarding house ke? Nooo.

You have a point, its probably safer that way. I suggested my mom, she just gave me a "you're not serious" look.

DeepZone:

Well, your statement flawed my hypothesis although environment may be a factor. Had it been you grew up in Egypt for example, you are more likely to speak ibo than yoruba because your mom is ibo. Men are so poor in transferring their mother tongue to their kids. I still believe you should be able to at least understand ibo unless your mother alienated herself from her relatives.

Its not as easy as you think learning two languages your parents rarely speak except on the few occassions relatives are available. One language shld be enough for a child.

davidylan:

You have a point, its probably safer that way. I suggested my mom, she just gave me a "you're not serious" look.

Dont mind her jare. I know she'll love it especially if you finally give her girls to care for

KarmaMod:

Dont mind her jare. I know she'll love it especially if you finally give her girls to care for

I know she's just being difficult now . . . she wont have a choice when the time comes.

The problem is not speaking it to the kids on time esp. at home. I know couple of kids here, not up to 10 yrs old that speaks Igbo. Infact, there is an igbo skool here and the level of participation is high. Once you speak to dem, they would get it. That's just like me though writing and reading is a no go area and YES, i went 2 a FEDERAL BOARDING SKOOL, Infact, ma lil family friends here speak proper NNEWI dialect,

The problem is not speaking it to the kids on time esp. at home. I know couple of kids here, not up to 10 years old that speaks Igbo. Infact, there is an igbo school here and the level of participation is high. Once you speak to them, they would get it. That's just like me though writing and reading is a no go area and YES, i went 2 a FEDERAL BOARDING SKOOL, Infact, ma little family friends here speak proper NNEWI dialect,

Where is that? I hope you don't mean Nigeria because it'll be a shame.

not Naija, Canada

Well Canada has a ALOT of Igbos.

Almost freaky

well, not as much as in da US and even in Canada sef, Igbos r not as much as da Yorubas but close sha, Sat. is Anambra State picnic sef. Abia and Enugu don do their own

@poster, I don't really get your point. We're talking about kids abroad being disrespectful, right?? Correct me if am wrong. What makes you think that sending the kid to Nigeria would make them 'respectful'?.
All Nigerian-bred kids are not respectful, y'know. Just like all American-bred kids are not disrespectful. It's up to the parents to teach their kids what's right and wrong. Being respectful is an individual thing, it rarely has anything to do with where you live. Yes, we know Nigerians are usually 'respectful' mostly because they have to, not because they want to. That's one reason I love America - you don't have to do anything you don't want to do.
While in Nigeria, I saw two young girls see an elderly woman and as a sign of greeting or whatever, they knelt down on d dusty ground. Once they stood up, they whispered some horrible things about her. Am like 'wtf?'. Really, why do they have to pretend?. Is that the kind of respect or culture you're talking about.
Well, America is not such a great place to raise a kid but it also has its advantages that sometimes, I change my mind about sending my kids(when I have them) to Nigeria for their education. For example, kids are not whupped or flogged in schools here. Who likes their kids 2 be flogged by some frustrated teachers? Thanks, I'd rather do it myself.
As for the language thingy, I know kids who were born here but speak their languages. I have cousins in Nigeria who were born, bred, and still living in naija yet they cannot speak igbo. Respect has to do with the way one is brought up not where you live. Parents should not shy away from their resposibilities by taking what they think is the easy way out, which is sending their kids to Nigeria for education. Some might actually get worse in Nigeria without their parents watching over them. Hey, it does work for some people but it's def. not the only option to raise a kid well.


Pheww, that was long! Forgive me, y'all. I get carried away. And am not even yoruba, oops!

Is it the parents who are showing off their American Accents with[i] worra, borrul, lirrule, whereuwet, compura, blezzing[/i] in their Bugle Boy Jeans, who will teach the Children Yoruba? Aren't we asking a lot here? I say send the kids AND the parents back to Nigeria to go learn culture.


For those who don't speak Yorubanized English with American Accent,

Worra - Water
Borrul - Bottle
Lirrule - Little
Whereuwet - where you at
Compura - Computer
Blezzing - Blessing.