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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making (1327 Views)
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Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Bilabong(m): 8:44pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
the two kids ur claiming our mine, ask her about bila-bee |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Nobody: 8:45pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Lifted123:No tear on the armor plate bro, your aspersion is a storm in a tea-cup. Grow up, down and out. Decision is yours, not mine. |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Lifted123: 8:51pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Thanks everyone. Its pleasant to behold the maturity and beauty of the hearts of Nigerians with of course the exception of the kids in this section. I actually wanted to reflect on 1 or 2 opinions and think I got one here. |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Lifted123: 9:07pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
The original post was placed on another forum in a Western country and the comments were quite the opposite. I want to believe I can make deductions from this as a basis for understanding value systems in Nigeria as against another western country. There is no hope for our dear country Nigeria. The things that are unacceptable in other climes or morally are so deeply rooted in our psyches. We as a people do not understand the importance of responsibility or even accountability. When people go to forums, they might need to take into consideration the value system of majority of those commenting and their demographic indices before taking decisions. |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by thegoodjoehunt(m): 9:18pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
What matters is that your wife still loves you. She made a mistake and realised her mistake. Don't give yourself an excuse to walk away from your marriage. Love is a battle because of challenges that shakes it. Put the past behind you and truly forgive her. Also console her. Even married couples make mistake and still forgive each other and move on. Let alone before marriage. Goodluck. |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by zeb04(f): 9:28pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Well lifted this is ur 7yrs of marriage we are talking about here,if you tink it ok to throw it away cz of someting she did b4 u guys were married,is up to u. Mayb divorce wil b better atleast u won't give her the guilty look and make her life miserable cz of something very litlle nd pls don't tel me u ve gone 4 therapy to look for solution. The solution is in u,if u are ready to let go, u would bt clearly u don't want to cz u want her to feel guilty always. Bt pls don't make that woman's life miserable cz of ur childish atitude. |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Lifted123: 9:32pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
zeb04: Well lifted this is ur 7yrs of marriage we are talking about here,if you tink it ok to throw it away cz of someting she did b4 u guys were married,is up to u. Mayb divorce wil b better atleast u won't give her the guilty look and make her life miserable cz of something very litlle nd pls don't tel me u ve gone 4 therapy to look for solution. The solution is in u,if u are ready to let go, u would bt clearly u don't want to cz u want her to feel guilty always. Bt pls don't make that woman's life miserable cz of ur childish atitude. If the Gestapo officers tried for the holocaust after 50 years were Nigerians, I am pretty sure they would gotten have away with mass murder. ![]() |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by zeb04(f): 9:55pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Lifted123:. Ok mayb I sounded harsh bt all am trying 2 say is pls forgive and forget |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by DBestDoc(f): 10:03pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Double post |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by DBestDoc(f): 10:04pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Yes you are very right, as Nigerians, we value the institution called marriage. We don't resort to divorce as the final solution to issues like yours which is not so with the westerners you are talkng about. As far as they are concerned, divorce is the way to go. I'm sorry to disappoint you, nobody is going to ask you to divorce your wife because she clearly did not commit adultery neither did she break her marriage vows. It's still up to you to choose what you want, either to go with the westerners and divorce your wife, or forgive her and keep your marriage. Bear it in mind that most of the replies you got here are not just from shallow minded people in one village. All the Best! |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by thegoodjoehunt(m): 10:26pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
thegoodjoehunt: What matters is that your wife still loves you. She made a mistake and realised her mistake. |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by bellong: 10:55pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Lifted123: The original post was placed on another forum in a Western country and the comments were quite the opposite. I want to believe I can make deductions from this as a basis for understanding value systems in Nigeria as against another western country. I couldn't get to read your initial submission but read through people's comments to have an idea of what you posted. All I can deduce is your wife offended you prior to tying the knot which you discovered late, for that you plan to divorce her. I may not have contrary opinion to what other posters have advised but I have to completely disagree with the crap you wrote up here about the country being hopeless. How can you arrive at such a conclusion based on the little issue you had with your wife? If you have problem with unforgiveness, does that mean everybody should tow that path? Your analogy of the Nazi holocaust is quite opposite and at variant with overall picture of your own scenario. If we are to go by your claim of western country's moral uprightness, Hilary should have divorced Bill a long time to mention only one of numerous cases. Bro, stop comparing Yam with Banana.. 1 Like |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Ballotti: 11:01pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Origyinor post don disappia ni? ![]() |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Lifted123: 11:17pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Ballotti: Origyinor post don disappia ni?Yes dear, because it has already served its purpose |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Lifted123: 11:22pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
bellong: Sorry you quite misunderstood the analogy. Nigerians do not believe in accountability and the duration and circumstances of events affects our view of issues. That is what I meant. The holocaust was war and war is no child play so one could excuse the excesses of the nazi. Even till now, nazi war crimes are still being punished. Same reason why Umaru Dikko is a free man today.get it now? On Hilary, that is an isolated situation. |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by bellong: 11:28pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Lifted123: I'm sorry if I misunderstood your analogy but I think I didn't misunderstand your grand message. With respect to what I deduced here, your definition of accountability in this case is subjective. Not a straight target. Meanwhile, some Nigerians may not believe in accountability but some demands that you are completely. Being accountable still doesn't mean there wouldn't be room for pardon when a party errs. Every country, race, culture and tradition has her own deficiency of accountability. Some are only not obvious. No system is perfect. 1 Like |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by Ballotti: 11:54pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
Lifted123: Abeg, next time don't lift posts without giving some form of acknowledgement to the source first hand! ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Understanding values-Anonymity,demographics & decision making by ypepe: 6:04am On Jan 10, 2014 |
Chai! This guy is smart! |
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