Raymonds Guide On: How To Become The Next Big Nollywood Star

I've been a keen observer in the industry known today as Nollywood, i've followed it's storied history with great passion,
i've seen stars rise and i've seen them fall, i've basically seen it all so believe me when i say i have some experience when
it comes to scouting for 'the next big thing in Nollywood'.

Do you fantasize about been chased out of an eatery by your numerous teeming fans? Or do you like the idea of been
addressed as the biggest and brightest but most controversial star in the whole Nollywood galaxy? well if you answered yes to either of those questions, then these rules you must obey religiously!
Firstly:

Change that accent;

If you want to make it big in this industry you have to sound posh, put some exotic flavours to you raw accent, make it go up a notch, you know, with some class.

Some accents that could get you recognized are the English accent (mostly the vocals) and then of course, American, never pronounce the 'T' if your going to say a word like 'hunter', it should come out as 'hunner',but this golden rule has some exceptions, if you're a short funny looking miget you don't have to fake it leave it raw besides people don't really give jack about your accent, they just sit there and imagine how SMALL you brain is or how rewarding it would feel picking you up by the legs and slamming your skull against an asphalt!, (Alway remember this change your accent rule worked for Ramsey Noah)
Get real!;

This second rule if obeyed and followed with so much seriousness could get you into Nollywood faster than you can say the word 'ACTION'. The rule simply involves you 'getting real' that is going into reality television, it really pays and with all
these reality TV buzz hitting the entertainment industry you'd have to be unluckier than Stephanie Okereke not to get chosen for at least one of them. And when you do get chosen try be controversial, don't sit back saying "I just want to be myself!" that doesn't do rubbish for you, always slam peoples egos even if its uncalled for, take a page out of vaughn's (sic) playbook (vaughn remember him? the dude from gulder ultimate search). You should also be smart enough to use the first rule!


Do outrageous things;

I don't care if your father is the pope! if you want to make it in Nollywood you should be wise to do stupid things at the right time. Wear skimpy dresses (if you're a lady) admit smoking weed, give it a corny name like wisdom weed, buy a power bike and ride it carelessly on the streets of lagos ( an accident would do good for your popularity), attend wild night parties, basically do wild things that would get your name into local tabloids and fuel their hunger for new material, they would reward you back by taking your name to the very hearts of the followers of Nollywood!

Put God first and your scandals second,

These two things should be your priorities! God and scandals. First God, always make seemingly honest refrences to God whenever your being interviewed. It doesn't matter if your an immoral skunk or a 'two bit LovePeddler' it always pays to give credit to God for your success, "God made it possile for the director to oblige me that role!" well your knowledge of how to please a man's sexual cravens did most of the trick, but give God the credit.

You see Nollywood is being run by a vast majority of Igbos, 95% of these Igbos are church goers, now even if you use your body to get roles (which i strongly advice you do if you want to be a star) pleasing those hands who feed you won't be a bad idea.

Now the scandal, your second most important priority, two words i say to it, BE SCANDALOUS!! get into affairs with
other peoples husbands, take Genevieve Nnaji for instance, you'd be amazed at how much fame and roles she got when that whole Genevieve and Atiku 'rumour' was buzzed about on the internet she now models for Lux, the girl is on a mouth watering contract with Lux thanks to Mr. Scandal!

And lastly:

Know when to 'settle down',

After you've made all that money from Nigerians who watch your films, it would be nessesary to get married, pick up a husband or a wife and STAY with him hold him tightly and be less controversial. NEVER ever spend like a fool, take a cue from MC Hammer, Dennis Rodman or even Mike Tyson, ( now those are dumb niggers!) being known as a cheap LovePeddler, corrupt bastard, immoral pig or any other adjective your critics may use to describe you with is bad enough but being broke is even worse. If done with perfection this rule would add an immaculate ending to your career!

And for those dull moments when you seem to loose the drive to go, remember that Lillian Bash who actually had a semi pot belle was once a Delta soap girl for a year with a pot belle! and those two midgets have acted in more that 100 Nollywood

movies, so why can't YOU BE THE NEXT NOLLYWOOD STAR!?

----------------Raymond's words of wisdom---------

"Any fool can BECOME a star but not every fool can REMAIN a star" - Raymond aka Blackspittle

ORIGINALLY COMPLIED BY ME!!!! RAYMOND (BS)

Raymand:

Raymonds Guide On: How To Become The Next Big Nollywood Star




Change that accent;

If you want to make it big in this industry you have to sound posh, put some exotic flavours to you raw accent, make it go up a notch, you know, with some class.

Some accents that could get you recognized are the English accent (mostly the vocals) and then of course, American, never pronounce the 'T' if your going to say a word like 'hunter', it should come out as 'hunner',but this golden rule has some exceptions, if you're a short funny looking miget you don't have to fake it leave it raw besides people don't really give jack about your accent, they just sit there and imagine how SMALL you brain is or how rewarding it would feel picking you up by the legs and slamming your skull against an asphalt!, (Alway remember this change your accent rule worked for Ramsey Noah)
Get real!;

Ouch!!!! That was really ghastly!!!

none of this has to do with talent it's all about what you do off the cameras, is this ALL that makes nollywood famous?

Thank you, Damsal. It's almost as if what makes the difference in showbiz is what shouldn't really matter. That's why I regard the entertainment business as a strange business.

ok ladies and gentlemen you've all heard what Raymond just said. So how many people are ready to become stars?

What's the benefit of being a star?

You get all the girls @ Seun

Wha if I don't fancy the sort of girls that will sleep with a man just because he's a "star"?

is this real advice or they're just being comedic? cause i kinda wannabe a "nollywood star!"!!. my parents want me to move to ghana with them to getting more in touch with my routes for like half a year, and i'm totally considering it, and i've been watching a lot of these ghana/nigeria movies and i seen alotof the girls acting in those movies and no offense to nollywood we allknow there movies aren't shakesphere and there actors aren't the greatest either, so i feel like it couldn't be that hard and it's something to do while i'm there, the only thing they never mentioned was csting calls, how the hell do the actors even know when/where auditions arebeing held? i wish they said that?

@Raymond

You gotta be one of the funniest dude on nairaland!

You crack me up!!

I need an agent, advice, help, check me out:

http://chibkbaby-howtobecomeanollywoodstar..com/

i wanna be in movies 2

For you guys out there asking series of questions like how and where do audition take place and how to be part of it, i strongly believe that artistevillage.com is the best site you can get all the information you need free of charge.

I mean audition details, success tips and all stuff like that. I personally think Ramond did a good job, but for you to succeed in nollywood, there are some more serious steps you should take and those steps are all available at artistevillage check it out now! to your success.

My name is Leslie and I am a new actress in Nollywood. I am interested in stage, film and commercial productions. As for my recent work, you can see me in leading role in a web series called "Sins and Secrets" by katrina benson and I played the role as sade in episodes part 1, 2 and 3. Thanks for taking the time to read this . I am available any time for an audition. Feel free to contact me on my cell phone at 240-640-1457 and email Lavg1234@yahoo.com.

P.S. Sorry I have to use this photo because this forum wont allow me to use a bigger picture so this is all I have

If you are serious about becoming a nollywood actor i'm assuming you have already created a professional profile on nollywood connections. Here is the website http://www.nollywood.ning.com go there and make your profile if you havnt already. List as many skills as you have. Take it one step further and upload a short video skit showing off your different acting skills. This will deff give you a leg up. Thats why that website is the way to go. not posting little forums on here.. directors don't read this forum. But the do visit nollywood connections. Good luck to you. Hope you make it.