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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: (949 Views)
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Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by nethacker(m): 4:45pm On Sep 25, 2008 |
Hi everyone, i have a girlfriend i wAnt to marry.From inception,before the relationship started, she knows i am a celestian by birth for i told her and she said there was no problem.We started off and everything was fine(albeit at times,we do quarrel).One day,she said she is will not be comfortable with my church because of what people(her friends) say about the church and that i must change my church for her to be happy(we ain't married yet)Then,she was a Part 3 student, I overlooked it and took it with levity.But now(she just graduated from the university),there has been so much pressure on me to quit my church for her if i want her to marry me.Then intensity of the pressure has been so much that I have been thinking of backing out of the relationship.I asked her why she said so and she said her parents(particularly the mother) and her friends(some of which are singles and jealous)hates anything celestial with passion.I replied her that i am not disturbing her to worship in my church but she said no that if i still want the relationship,QUITTING the church for her is the only way out.I reminded her that i told her i was born in Celestial and she agreed to date me with no objection,why the sudden change of mind now that you've graduated?She said because of the way people(so much emphasis on her friends) feel about the church.Nairalanders,what do you feel, I ,on my part,refused her request because to me that is self-centredness. I need your opinion. |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by jennykadri: 7:58pm On Sep 26, 2008 |
hmmmm wat can i say |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by iice(f): 3:55am On Sep 27, 2008 |
LMAO @ friends Where is her own mind in all this? For friends or herself? Is she going to marry her friends? |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by otokx(m): 5:02pm On Sep 27, 2008 |
Stand your ground, give her an ultimatum and when it expires, drop da bomb. |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by ehie007(m): 7:27pm On Sep 27, 2008 |
@poster Men i feel you jare, i am aving a similar case. i met a gal quite recently, and i really liked her, we became friends and subsequently close friends, the proble is that she said she cant date me cos of my catholic beliefs. Men this penticostal/catholic thing is crazy, only God go save person. ![]() ![]() |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by chusben(m): 9:53am On Sep 29, 2008 |
This issue is a serious case nowadays, i think so many of them believe so much in their pastors than the God we serve. My pastor said this, my pastor said that, al blablabla, To me a relationship should build on love and beside a woman has no church till she gets to her husband's house. |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by Nobody: 10:42am On Sep 29, 2008 |
. |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by iceland(m): 3:31pm On Sep 29, 2008 |
Siena:Me too,and that's why it's called marriage.It's a life time thing.The best is for both of you not to go ahead with the relationship so that it wont lead to marriage.Atimes we realise late but the worst thing is to realise too late . . . that is,after marriage.Thank god she's telling you now.Please,Let her go without persuasion |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by kokorunna(m): 3:00pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
You should stand firm, whats your church got to do with your relationship. Unless she is hiding something from you |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by sistawoman: 3:07pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
If she is the type that is always worried about what others think then there is nothing you can do to change this. Just note that you will have a lifetime of changes ahead of you because of what other people think. She is not strong enough to stand on her own and support her own arguments and live her life for herself. You really should evaluate this woman that you want to marry. It appears that outward appearances are far more important then anything else to her. |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by Nobody: 3:13pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
The fact is: she doesn't need you anymore! |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by chikito1(f): 3:48pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
Tell her to pick between you and her so called friends that hate celetial. The irony is one of her so called friends may end up with a celestial ![]() |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by mecussey(m): 6:05pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
She may be doubting ur church, but used her friend to express her feelings. If she must be ur partner, u must consider her feelings too; now let me reverse ur question, should you love ur church more than ur wife? We are serving the same God; if ur church is her problem, you can find another way to worship God otherwise find another wife that would love u and ur church. Simple |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by hommer(f): 6:48pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
Before any one goes into marriage,he must think of compatibilty.The two must be spiritually,emotionally and financilly compatible.The issue is dat wen u get married to her, you might want spiritual committments from her and this can lead to problems in marriage if she diagrees to obey you. I wil advice that u break up with her unless u re so willing to change to her church. |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by chessguru(m): 6:51pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
, on love with God in it!! |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by Nobody: 7:00pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
Who is going to strengthen the r/ship? Not the church, but the God I serve. |
Re: Should A Relationship Be Built On Love Or The Church You Attend: by untainted: 7:35pm On Sep 30, 2008 |
chus-ben: it is pathetic the way pastors have taken over the role of God in most churches. They interpret the bible upside down just so as to have members. But the reason most of them are adamant on marriage is to protect their investments, oops i mean their clients, sorry, their congregation. they are particularly obstinate when it affects the female members because they believe the outsider (male suitor) will take her away and that would be a lot of tithe money moving to the suitor's church. on the last half of ur last sentence, that will be a debate for another day sha, |
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