satanist: what do you mean "WE" ........... me ? gay?. ......... NEVER!!

dahonestboss: Cross gender relationship works, if it doesnt work for you, then you need to examine your mindset and the kind of people you hang out with. As a matter of fact, my best friend is a young lady, and after my family (not even cousin), she comes next. I know all what we have been through and we both have our own different partners.

Friendship is give and take, but not giving and taking sex as return.

Ishilove: Op, I don't know what you're talking about. One of my closest friends is a guy who I've known for 15yrs now( since secondary school). He lectures in Canada now, but not once has there ever been any awkwardness between us. There is almost nothing we can't tell each other, and never once have we ever had the issues you mentioned. He's a friend and a brother, and our friendship waxes stronger.

JeffreyJamez:

The girl herself is hanging with the wrong crew because I can bet that this same girl being ignored by a guy is probably taking a better guy for granted..... It's a vicious circle I tell you.

Caracta:

DickDastardly: Mynd are you by any means encouraging guys not to help sisters in need? That the assistance must always be rewarded in kind? What is the world turning into? What of the part of the bible that says "give alms to the needy".
If i so wish i can sponsor a poor girl to the University and wont even think of her pants, as God's reward is the best!
Please this thread will only incite good guys to be wicked and withdraw their aid to poor girls they have hitherto helped. Thanks

MissMeiya:

Absolutely. One of my closest friends in the world is a man. We're like siblings. I listen to him, give him relationship advice, I'm the first to call him on his birthday, and whenever I'm in Nigeria I bring him gifts (which he tries to refuse). He listens to me, gives me advice, and worries about me, drives me places (if he's available--I'm not a brat.) We know each other's deepest secrets and fears. Never given money, but if the other needed it, we'd empty our bank accounts for each other.

We do all these things, not as some kind of scorekeeping whatever, but because we WANT to, because we care about each other. The way you would feel about an only sibling.

I'm wondering if OP knows what true friendship is.

justi4jesu: I, for one, think that when it comes to married couples, cross-gender friendships are not wise.

Everyone has an opinion and an anecdote to share.

I found that while women are generally not attracted to their male friends and saw the relationship as strictly platonic, the men usually have romantic feelings for their lady friends.

Not only are the guys more attracted to their female buds, they also mistakenly believe that the feelings were mutual, and they are more willing to act on their perceived mutual attraction.

I just conclude that women generally think guys and gals can just be friends, while men secretly hope the relationship can become something more.

JeffreyJamez:


Oooooohhhh!!! I understand your point now.!!!...

That girls believe a guy won't/can't help you out without asking for something in return.

njokusboy: . It happens the other way tooo... Otherwise, u re right... In most cross gender relationships, one of the partner is attracted to the other and wishes it could be something more...... D hope of it metarmorphosing into a real relationship is what keeps the attracted person going...

Richiy: You forgot to mention the fact that most guys would not consciously appreciate that girl that goes the extra mile for them. Rather, they would go around chasing girls that have no regard for them and end up screaming that girls are heartless. Let every guy check their lives, there is always that boy/girl that is different but they become so used to him/her that they put him/her in the background.

Ishilove: Op, I don't know what you're talking about. One of my closest friends is a guy who I've known for 15yrs now( since secondary school). He lectures in Canada now, but not once has there ever been any awkwardness between us. There is almost nothing we can't tell each other, and never once have we ever had the issues you mentioned. He's a friend and a brother, and our friendship waxes stronger.

shymexx:

Er, can you help a brother out with this one?

I don't even see all the chics I grew with as friends. They're just acquaintances that I chat to about generic stuffs, and perhaps growing up. And the only one who tried to be "friend" ended up forcing herself to become "girlfriend" and now she's an ex-girlfriend.

Personally, I don't even think chics are loyal enough for the "friendship" role, except you're emotionally involved with them.

MissMeiya:

Absolutely. One of my closest friends in the world is a man. We're like siblings. I listen to him, give him relationship advice, I'm the first to call him on his birthday, and whenever I'm in Nigeria I bring him gifts (which he tries to refuse). He listens to me, gives me advice, and worries about me, drives me places (if he's available--I'm not a brat.) We know each other's deepest secrets and fears. Never given money, but if the other needed it, we'd empty our bank accounts for each other.

We do all these things, not as some kind of scorekeeping whatever, but because we WANT to, because we care about each other. The way you would feel about an only sibling.

I'm wondering if OP knows what true friendship is.

tintingz: To have a successful cross gender friendship start from childhood except you guys are already having crush on each other or having intimate fantasies, that won't work out.

knowing each other right from childhood is like being close as brother and sister but sometimes it ends up with relationship like you said but I've mention the thing that can lead to it.

Caracta: It's working for me. I must be lucky.

To each his own. I take people as individuals, I don't judge them based on what a theory says about a particular gender.

Ishilove: Op, I don't know what you're talking about. One of my closest friends is a guy who I've known for 15yrs now( since secondary school). He lectures in Canada now, but not once has there ever been any awkwardness between us. There is almost nothing we can't tell each other, and never once have we ever had the issues you mentioned. He's a friend and a brother, and our friendship waxes stronger.

shymexx:

I hear that.

However, most times, people do grow apart. Coupled with the fact that women are emotional beings, and once they fall-in-love with a next person, the loyalty will diminish like the OP asserted. But with most thorough bred guys, regardless of relationships or marriages, they'll always maintain the loyalty, due to the brotherhood bond.

Also, with me, I'd say I've lipsed at least 90% of the chics I talk to...and the rest are on the waiting list. It's basically just difficult being platonic friends with chics, without being emotionally involved with them, except the chic isn't attractive. And once you start getting romantically involved with chics, best believe they'll want to take it to the next stage. If you decline, they'll start the emotional blackmail and the use-and-dump argument.

Anyway, I get your point though. And I'll try it out...however it has to be the most unattractive chic ever.