If only I was sure where to start.
I am new here...I feel like my heart is sitting on the outside of my body, getting dry and absolutely not the place to be.
I'm sorry I have not made a proper intro, this is all I can muster for right now. My head is spinning kinda and I hope I don't
ramble.

Naija men..I know I know.

I get this telemarketing call..I hate those things so I started cussing this guy out. I was mad because it was only about 3 or 4 days prior
I had told someone sounding just like him, and from the same company not interested and to not call again. He kept talking, pleading that no, the prior call was not him. I'm still mad as hell and then he said he's a foreign student who needs to work almost any job to help pay for school. Ok, I'm done! I know the financial struggles of a student and in that moment my heart softened and although I was sure and told him I was not interested in their products we kept talking about school, about him and me. I congratulated him on his hustle and willingness to do whatever to get an education. Next thing you know we're exchanging fb info. 30 minutes later we're ending the call, which in company time is like a year and a day.

About a week later I noticed an email from him. I had not given him my address so instantly I knew he got it from his company records. I wasn't mad about it actually I found it kinda cute. I know the company I had done business with had sold all my info except cc to his company. If anything I was pissed at company #1. Anyways, I emailed him back and then we started msging on fb. Next thing u know we're on skype.

Fast forward to less than a month and I've been asked for money more than once. The last straw was him asking for money to buy a bed because his sister was coming to stay with him for part of the summer. He rooms with 2 other guys. He and sister would stay in his room
Since sister got there, we hardly talk, he calls me 2 or 3 am his time and always in a whisper. Once when I asked him where he was he said in one of his room mate's room.

So what happened? this guy married? have a girlfriend or something? If truly his sister (I think she's older than he by a couple years) why would he try to hide the fact from her that's he's talking to a 'girl'? We're not looking for introduction, we only just started to get to know each other for crying out loud? So, he refuses to explain, says we're done. Yikes! We only got a month in. So, was this just about money?

You ma, have been used as a maga aka mugu. He is using you. You shouldnt rant over what or why he is acting that way, you should rant over the fact that you did not wake up on time from your slumber. Dont get me wrong I aint blaming you. just saying you should be kicking yourself in the butt for being used by the a.sshole. I hope you wont rant here and then land in his bed after his babe is gone and he comes to whisper some sweet nothing into your ears? Cos I know that is how most women behave, a man uses them, avoids them when his main babe shows, and then when the main babe leaves they come with excuses why they acted silly. Stupid excuses like, ah, you know my sis wants me to marry her friend in my country and will not be happy to see me talking to another woman here, please bear with me, I will introduce you to her but please lets give her time before I present you to my people. I still havent told them that I dont want to marry their arranged bride.
And the women will forgive and the game becomes a cycle. Till she gets his wedding IV by accident or he just simply tells her he is through with her. Then she sees the light that has been shining since right there.
News flash, she is his main chick. You ma are his money bag his ATM.

Eyah...take heart!
so ppl like this still exist?


Wake up ma..

Singing# it is ova nw...ova nooow

yes herald9, we still do exist Only because we always feel that, 'not our guy' 'our guy is different' that kinda thing.
I get it now though-eyes wide open. @ delishpot I didn't lose any money. I have sister's arrival to thank for that
though because it was certainly in the works. What I did lose is a sense of balance...it's like having a near accident-you know
you were not hit physically, but boy! talk about being shook-up. I did ask about marrying the sister's friend and he said no, but
of course he lying about something. Out of my hands now.

ConfusedHeart: yes herald9, we still do exist Only because we always feel that, 'not our guy' 'our guy is different' that kinda thing.
I get it now though-eyes wide open. @ delishpot I didn't lose any money. I have sister's arrival to thank for that
though because it was certainly in the works. What I did lose is a sense of balance...it's like having a near accident-you know
you were not hit physically, but boy! talk about being shook-up. I did ask about marrying the sister's friend and he said no, but
of course he lying about something. Out of my hands now.

Phewwww, thank God. Happy to hear that. Now get over tge shock. The guy is trash and not worth it. Go buy a new dress or phone and smile cos instead of giving it to that thief, you used it to buy something nice for yourself. It relieves the shock lol.
Anyway, let the peanut brain go. He will only bring you pain. He is all for what he can make out of you and you def will have him throw tantrums if his needs arent met as he expects. You know, not kissing you, not talking to you from time to time cos he saw some money on you and asked for half of it, but you refused, because you have been saving to buy a new car for yourself. He goes into the you dont love me phase and doesnt act as normal and says dont greet me. if you loved me, you will not choose to buy a car over my sick mom in my country who needs cash for hospital bill. I know their type.

Thank your stars it didn't go on for too long.

Thanks guys. Now I just need my heart to get inline with my head

delishpot:

Phewwww, thank God. Happy to hear that. Now get over tge shock. The guy is trash and not worth it. Go buy a new dress or phone and smile cos instead of giving it to that thief, you used it to buy something nice for yourself. It relieves the shock lol.
Anyway, let the peanut brain go. He will only bring you pain. He is all for what he can make out of you and you def will have him throw tantrums if his needs arent met as he expects. You know, not kissing you, not talking to you from time to time cos he saw some money on you and asked for half of it, but you refused, because you have been saving to buy a new car for yourself. He goes into the you dont love me phase and doesnt act as normal and says dont greet me. if you loved me, you will not choose to buy a car over my sick mom in my country who needs cash for hospital bill. I know their type.

lol funny...not funny I hear you. It's all good now I'm back to being myself. shock is all it was. Lesson learned. Thanks for your imput.