repogirl: aabegg o, to be on the safe side, morenike23, pls let the guy wait for you to finish school, then get married or get married but hold off on kids cos it isn't fun and it won't be fair to you or your baby! Think of yourself first before any other person! Beevan, which one is low threshold for multitasking? These things should be planned properly to avoid undue stress on mother, her studies and the baby!
morenike23 pls iron these issues clearly with your fiance. As for your dad, u should let him know first, possibly through your mom? Let her break it to him first... He has to know before you spring your fiance and his relatives on him... Dnt worry too much, every good father wants his daughter married well, if I were him sha, I'd advice waiting till you are through with schooling .... Your fiance should be able to wait if he knows your worth to him and wants the best for you!

beeevan:



My dear am just sharing my opinion which she can take or ignore, married women with kids graduate every time and graduate well too. No one said it will be easy but if she can cover the fronts adequately, why not? Time waits for no man.

dorosola:

not everyone has the ability to withstand the stress that comes with being married while in school. she might not be ready for all that mentally......she got to look deep inside herself and as the simple question "am I ready?".

you Can also www.pakogirl..com for more

Emioga: @beetle and other posters who suggested my family members moving in my MIL,when moving in with us said her pastor said no visitors shud be allowed 2 stay with us(i took d hint)bt dem family dey cum sleep ova sef and like u suggested i've ignored both completely.i dnt smile/laugh/have any conversation whatsoever and am either in my room or d kitchen(dnt allow them cook in my kitchen)#operation mind ur bizness#

Emioga: @krystal101 looooool and my palour too na my territories be dat and i never overstep them.i even have another entrance into d house(my own entrance)i sweep my side of d house they sweep theirs.like a poster said desperate times call for desperate measures i cant kill myself

Emioga: @krystal101 looooool and my palour too na my territories be dat and i never overstep them.i even have another entrance into d house(my own entrance)i sweep my side of d house they sweep theirs.like a poster said desperate times call for desperate measures i cant kill myself

Emioga: @krystal101 looooool and my palour too na my territories be dat and i never overstep them.i even have another entrance into d house(my own entrance)i sweep my side of d house they sweep theirs.like a poster said desperate times call for desperate measures i cant kill myself

Emioga: @krystal101 looooool and my palour too na my territories be dat and i never overstep them.i even have another entrance into d house(my own entrance)i sweep my side of d house they sweep theirs.like a poster said desperate times call for desperate measures i cant kill myself

Purecotton: With all these, I still love my husband, I support him, I encourage him to succeed and I keep praying for him.


This whole situation has turned me into a very angry, abusive, unhappy and bitter woman as I feel I hold so much grudges against my husband and I really need help to let them go.

Purecotton: This whole situation has turned me into a very angry, abusive, unhappy and bitter woman as I feel I hold so much grudges against my husband and I really need help to let them go.

Godmystrength: @purecotton- since you said your husband has realized all his mistakes and apologized, why do you still hold so much grudges(or any grudges at all) against your husband?
And i don't think i am clear on this your last statement. Are you talking about the past or the present??

aisha2:

She probably hasnt really been able to fully express her hurt for the fear of being labeled arrogant, a bad wife and a rude woman who thinks she is all that for supporting her husband.
She may be walking on egg shells hence her own feelings are concealed and may even pretend while she is hurting.
We Nigerians are good at that, we care more about appearences than real feelings hence bottling up our feelings and ending up hurt and very angry inside, one day we explode to something so little. I carry my emotions on my sleeve, if I am angry I react then and there then let it go, so many people have advised that I pretend more but I refuse, better for me and my mental health.

I advice that she sit with her husband and be totally honest on how hurt she really is, explain how talking her down upsets her and from there they open a new chapter and genuenly move on.

snazzylove: Seriously I don't get this.
A 3yr old boy selfservicing!

A friend of mine yesterday confided in me that on 3 different times she has caught her 3yr+ old son stroking his manliness.
The first time according to her she didn't read meaning into it but cautioned him gently, the second time, she said she was very firm and warned him sternly to stop it and never to try dat again.
But the third incident is wat actually hit me, this time according to her she caught him in the same act and unfortunately the younger sister that is barely two years is practising the same thing with him. She said she spanked him mercillesly and even applied hot pepper on the kini
I told her to monitor dem closely especially what they watch on the tele, the type of people they associate with and even the kind of books around the house. And equally make sure they are always together idle, she should get them educative toys and books to keep them busy, at least it will take their little minds off dat.
Fear grip me o
Dunno if this is normal or what.
Mothers pls oo keep an eye on what your kids are doing.
Anyone with similar experience or solution to it should pls share so that we all can learn.

Godmystrength: i know. But i think she has a leverage. For her husband to have apologized, it is step towards the right direction. She should just seized that period/opportunity to voice out her feelings so that they can do all the begging. apologizing, making up and bury everything once and for all. Because to her husband now, all is well but to her, it is not.
Hope you are good. happy new month.

Godmystrength: I will come and comment later. I am still shocked at the bolded

aisha2:

The process is not the same for everyone of us, I have a feeling she is afraid to say somethings so "Peace can reign" hence bottling up so much and feeling so angry. Slowly sha, God heal them.

Thank You dear. Am fine dear. How is my Soldier

pickabeau1: .however what do you want..

purecotton: I hold so much grudges against my husband and I really need help to let them go.

cococandy:
grudge

So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you,leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.

GboyegaD: @Snazzylove,
Your friend isn't fit to be a mother. If both kids at that tender age exhibit such character, she should sit them down and find the root cause of where such habit was learnt that way, she can handle it in a better way. What the kids need is help to get out of such habit as I do not believe they know what they are doing and I an sure they get no pleasure nor relief from such.
Applying pepper to the kini makes no difference and it is only an abuse to the child.

cococandy: @ pickabeau, seen.
Yes.

But at the same time too,if he doesn't sit up and start being appreciative of her support and efforts, whatever truce they reach now may only be temporary.
Because if any of his jealousy rears it's head anytime again in future,it's back her being resentful and bitter.

Too bad he's not here.
Situations like this are best solved if both parties get some talking to.
It's hard when one person gets good advice and while working for their success,the other person won't be on the same page with him/her.
Just that there's nothing we can do about it.

snazzylove: Seriously I don't get this.
A 3yr old boy selfservicing!

A friend of mine yesterday confided in me that on 3 different times she has caught her 3yr+ old son stroking his manliness.
The first time according to her she didn't read meaning into it but cautioned him gently, the second time, she said she was very firm and warned him sternly to stop it and never to try dat again.
But the third incident is wat actually hit me, this time according to her she caught him in the same act and unfortunately the younger sister that is barely two years is practising the same thing with him. She said she spanked him mercillesly and even applied hot pepper on the kini
I told her to monitor dem closely especially what they watch on the tele, the type of people they associate with and even the kind of books around the house. And equally make sure they are not always together idle, she should get them educative toys and books to keep them busy, at least it will take their little minds off dat.
Fear grip me o
Dunno if this is normal or what.
Mothers pls oo keep an eye on what your kids are doing.
Anyone with similar experience or solution to it should pls share so that we all can learn.

pickabeau1: I agree with your post in part but feel outside involvement should b a thing of last resort