Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,198,789 members, 7,969,339 topics. Date: Tuesday, 08 October 2024 at 05:34 AM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Be Nice Or Be Nasty? (2311 Views)
This Is Why You Should NEVER Be Nice To A Woman / Do U Think Am A Fool Or Jst Been Nice Or Love Is Killing Me.... / My Boyfriend Saw A Nasty Text Message On My Phone (2) (3) (4)
Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by whitelexi(m): 9:36am On Oct 16, 2008 |
I've got this chic who's attracted to me and has not hidden it. Her friends have put in a strong case for her and her personality, her actions show she's a decent girl, but there's that little something missing. I haven't been able to place a finger on it yet but i just dont feel that way when i'm with her. I keep meeting her everywhere, on the streets, at the local shopping mall, on the train platform e.t.c. and we say hello and have a chat from there almost all the time but i dont ever feel that sensation or attraction when i'm with her. I took her out for a date last weekend and we went to the movies later, it was supposed to be romantic [Just to see if i could feel differently on a date] but it wasnt for me. The real issue here is, i see all her efforts and i know its most likely not going to work in her favour. I pity her and dont know how else to ask her to stop, I have also tried hard to as much as like her above average but its not happening. I have refused to love out of pity or hope, but she's not relenting either. I can choose to get in and out like a thief in the night, I can choose to be blunt and nasty when i tell her off, i can choose anything but its not nice and i dont want to start what i cannot finish. What would you do in these circumstances? |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by dorleey(f): 2:33pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
it will be best to tell her off before u make d greatest mistake of ur life. if u tell her in a mild way and she refuses, try a little harsh way or avoid her totally. some pple cant read a handwriting on d wall unless u spell it out for them. dont make a mistake of playing along with someone u dont love cos u might end up creating total disaster for the two of u. prevention is better than cure |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by kokoye(m): 3:01pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
You are not attracted to her. You might want to try hooking her up with some other guy, but this might backfire and kickstart the attraction to her. Just make sure you shag first b4 you let her go. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by whitelexi(m): 3:20pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
kokoye: True, i thought about that u know? But shagging her will make things worse, and u would've given her the cue she needs to take control a bit. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Tgirl4real(f): 3:33pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
abeg no follow that foolish advice. Your stand is perfectly ok u already have d ans |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by shylladear(f): 3:44pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
dorleey: @dorleey thats a good one @poster pls dont even think about starting what u cannot finish |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by spikedcylinder: 3:49pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
kokoye: I see. This is what you would do huh? Why if I may ask? @lexi Be firm but kind. If possible sef, tell her you already have a girlfriend. There's no use wasting your d,ck up and down like Mr ^^^ has suggested. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by kokoye(m): 3:55pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
@ spikedcylinder. I did not grow up that way so I 'll tell you why. I had been the very nice guy years ago but it ended up blowing up in my face. This happened like 3 of 4 times. The girls went all about town calling me a slacker and stuff. Imagine going thru this kinda thing during your first year in college. It turned me into a savage, sorry. But I'm happily married now with kids and old things have passed away , just poking fun at the poster. No harm intended. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by janami(f): 4:01pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
OP U cld do these three things: Be Honest, Nice but firm |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by spikedcylinder: 4:11pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
kokoye: It still doesn't justify the "chop and clean mouth" mentality that a lot of people develop. Imagine if I had a guy who liked me but I don't like him and decide to err. . . . maybe start taking money from him. What kind of person would that make me be? Your guess is as good as mine. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Pataki: 4:24pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
@ Poster, If you do not love her, do not lead her on. Not even the thought of sex should enter. You will be an emotional wreck if it ever occurs. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by whitelexi(m): 4:28pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
Pataki: Now u sound like you've been there, done that Tell me, how did u wriggle out of it, eh? |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Pataki: 4:36pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
whitelexi:It was nasty. To get out took serious guts and extraordinary bold face. She went to all extent to make me stay. Blackmail, suicide, threats of all sorts, repeated phone calls, crying most times (she sure knows how to cry). But through it all, I scaled out of it thanks to relocation and all that. Please my brother, just let her go before it goes beyond what you never expected. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by arramyjay: 4:40pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
I think you should just let her knw yyou dont feel or see her in that way.Taking her out for a date and things like that could give her a wrong signal,so just let her knw b4 it is too late.Be nice but let her knw. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Okanran(m): 4:42pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
whitelexi: With the above settled, u're already half way there. All dat remains, is for u 2 nicely break it down 4 her, y u guys can't be 2gether. All d best, amigo! |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by chika98: 4:43pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
At the end of the day it is going to be just a shag and it won't mean anything to you. If you don't like her then let her know. I'm pretty sure that she isn't dumb and she will get the hint . |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by cutey01(f): 4:54pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
chika98:After shagging? Is that not mean? Me think OP should just tell her now before she lures him to bed. If she succeeds, it might end up in a very messy breakup |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by sleekdot(m): 5:09pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
It is not as easy as you say. I am also in the same shoes with a girl we are old enough. She is mid twenties. A friend hooked us up but I am not just ready I keep telling her to take it easy but she is head over heels. She calls me like 10 times a day like 20 text messages per day. Even doing some erotic exchanges over the phone. Remember hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. She has a good job and she is ready to settle down but I am not sure I can say the same. We stay in different states she wants to travel from Colorado to meet me in New York but I keep stalling because I know it would get really complicated If she should come. We might end up doing stuff. I keep using work pressure as an excuse but she suggested Thanksgiving Holidays and I don't Just want to do anything nasty. Partly because It might affect the mutual friend who hooked us up. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Nobody: 10:14pm On Oct 16, 2008 |
Tell her nicely. If she has any respect for herself she would take your word for it and leave. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Busybody2(f): 2:34am On Oct 17, 2008 |
Awwwwww, so romantic, you want to dump her for Emerald or Ujujoan |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by robby1(m): 2:42am On Oct 17, 2008 |
Here is a simple solution. introduce her to me. where in london are you anyway? |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by whitelexi(m): 9:48am On Oct 17, 2008 |
Busy_body: Life with uju would be a nitemare. . . u know like that movie "what happens in vegas" Emerald is a lovely girl, she's quite hot for an ordinary ME, but hey, to be seen in public with a cutie like her? I'll take that anyday Cant say much about the long term future though. But the girl in question has been trailing me long before Emerald, u will be wrong to say that I'm clearing the way. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Nautillus(m): 12:58pm On Oct 17, 2008 |
This is a hard sell brov . . . .was in a similar boat millions of years ago. . . .the chic virtually stalked me . .she ended up being friends with ALL the females in my life (Sistas/Cousin/neighbors/My mum . . .you name it) Well, as 4 me i gave in eventually . . .well, sex was a new experience for me abt that time . . .I gave in an we had the crasiest relashionship ever . . . .The chic took all the crap i threw at her in stride up until i pulled of a nasty one that broke the Camels back. My advice, DON'T DO IT . . .& always tell her that you cant . . .she will thank you 4 it eventually. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by opuro(m): 1:12pm On Oct 17, 2008 |
TRUH IS ELASTIC if you strech the truth it will fly back and sting you the truh of the matter is that you dont know what the babe really want abi na shagging she want o, you no know abi na serious tang o you no know as her what she really want b4 you deside on what to do |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by whitelexi(m): 2:06pm On Oct 17, 2008 |
opuro: Good point, never crossed my mind, i'll give her a call, arrange a date this weekend and talk to her. More updates soon. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Nobody: 4:41pm On Oct 17, 2008 |
whitelexi: @ topic - Just tell her!! No insinuations, no actions, not 'trying' to tell her . , just tell her!!! I f you are not interested you are not interested. Tell her you can't give her what she wants . . a r/ship what else could she possibly want?. Why do you guys find it so difficult to be honest |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by ifyalways(f): 4:46pm On Oct 17, 2008 |
Tell her how you feel jare.I don't why men suddenly grow cold feet in stuffs like this Tell her mildly,if it does not work be blunt but polite.She wud be a fool not to accept it and even thank you for telling her the truth. |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by NeoBlack(m): 5:13pm On Oct 17, 2008 |
I think Action speak first. lol then go for her. if she likes, she can fall for you and become one, if you wouldn't cheat on her. Jp |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Busybody2(f): 5:17pm On Oct 17, 2008 |
Ujujoan: ifyalways: Hey, the two both of you zip it Look at your mouth like "tell her", na so the thing easy You want him to have a stalker on his hand, calling him all hours of the day, crying and pleading for an explanation, asking why all the time, turning up unannounced at his house, begging that she would change and promising him she would be at his beck and call, and would even turn to his footmat . . . no be so girls dey freak out when they get dumped @ Whitelexi You would not have been in this situation if you had heeded my advice and gone for Uju Anyway it is not too late, at least you know she would not create any drama if you tell her to pack her bags. She's made of teflon |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Tgirl4real(f): 5:57pm On Oct 17, 2008 |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by Nobody: 9:42am On Oct 20, 2008 |
Busy_body: My friend carry your busybody go rest for one corner jare I dont think she'll stalk him if he tells her. If he's direct enough she'll know there's nothing more she can do. But if he keeps playing games, she'll keep beleiving and keep stalking him. Thats what I think sha. Of course you busybodys could do otherwise |
Re: Be Nice Or Be Nasty? by whitelexi(m): 1:30pm On Oct 20, 2008 |
whitelexi: I asked her what exactly she wants - like i said i would. She wants to spend the rest of her life with me, not even a relationship! It sounded funny at first and i laughed out but then i saw the look in her eyes - the girl was damn serious. She asked me what was funny and i just said it wasnt what i was expecting to hear. I told her as truthfully as i could that the thing will not work but she's bent on at least giving it a try. I told her my heart is not in it but she wants me to give her a chance - even promised that if i gave her a chance i'd change my mind about her within a week! She said a few things that i know are very emotional to her and even asked me to place myself in her shoes and imagine how i'd feel. The meeting ended worse than it started because i feel i have now given her a chance to put a few toes in the door. I'm considering moving out of my apartment without notice. Its getting bad, but why should i move out because of a girl? Busy_body: I appreciate your concern eh, but uju will kill me before my time |
He's All In One But . . . . . / Which One Would You Go For Guys!!! / Your Babe Give You Deadline To Marry Her Wetin You Go Do?
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 66 |