Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,169,190 members, 7,873,873 topics. Date: Thursday, 27 June 2024 at 08:09 PM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / .... (2725 Views)
Dear Family, Your Advice Is Urgently Needed / I Need Your Advice As Regards My Family Issue. / Your Advice! (2) (3) (4)
.... by bruf: 8:14pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
. 2 Likes |
Re: .... by Youngsage: 8:20pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
k. :-/ |
Re: .... by hushmail: 8:23pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
bruf: Hello Family, You see a bright future, then why the double mind? although, it will be rough, but u have to persevere, nothing good comes easy 1 Like |
Re: .... by dytbabe: 8:30pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
Take it slow Like really slow I mean really slow, money is as important as love in a marriage. And yes keep praying for it shall be well 7 Likes |
Re: .... by Gboliwe: 8:30pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
bruf: Hello Family, The bible says "one shall chase a thousand and two, ten thousand." If the marriage is for good, you both will rise above the poverty level real fast because "he who finds a good wife....and obtains favor from the Lord. " 5 Likes |
Re: .... by mployer(m): 8:31pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
It depends on your reason for getting married. If you are looking for a ticket out of poverty, then he is probably not the right choice. If you want peace, companionship and compatibility without minding some inconveniences, then you stay with him I will advice you stay with him. There is a reason he looked 'promising' to you. You may not be able to explain it but just believe it. 7 Likes |
Re: .... by Nobody: 8:40pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
mployer: It depends on your reason for getting married. If you are looking for a ticket out of poverty, then he is probably not the right choice.Nice one.. This s all u need op |
Re: .... by Nobody: 8:40pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
mployer: It depends on your reason for getting married. If you are looking for a ticket out of poverty, then he is probably not the right choice.Nice one.. This s all u need gal |
Re: .... by Nobody: 8:42pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
How I wish I can av me a gal like u... |
Re: .... by delishpot: 8:49pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
Hmn, if you guys marry and decide to put off having kids till you are financially stable then go ahead but if you desire to have kids asap biko just wait o. Hang in there and try to find better jobs and improve on finances before the big leap. my dear. Money is important in any union. I am not saying he should have millions o. But at least have enough to avoid begging people for money to buy cow and gate or diapers. Or to look for rent cos you spent last month salary treating malaria. To be frank, 25k is small to plan to start a family on. 11 Likes |
Re: .... by sexylogan(m): 8:57pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
bruf: Hello Family, Pray. |
Re: .... by eyenCalabar(m): 9:07pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
It depends largely on what the young man is doing today for tomorrow. Is he a graduate or a businessman? What are his skills? What are his investments so far? What are his ambitions? And you, what are you doing now while waiting for service? What are your skills too? Or are you just going to depend on your degree? What are your plans and where do you hope to see yourself few years from now? What are you doing now? Making a relationship work is a collective responsibility. You guys should plan together on where to be few years from now and work towards it. Put away the idea of marriage for now and invest on yourselves. And lastly, 'close' your legs. If you no fit hold body, use condom. This is time to work for the future. Wish you guys goodluck. |
Re: .... by bruf: 9:20pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
Thanks all, the post has been modified/completed,I mistakenly clicked on 'submit' while I was still writing. Thanks y'all for your advices. |
Re: .... by bruf: 9:36pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
eyenCalabar: It depends largely on what the young man is doing today for tomorrow. Is he a graduate or a businessman? What are his skills? What are his investments so far? What are his ambitions? And you, what are you doing now while waiting for service? What are your skills too? Or are you just going to depend on your degree? What are your plans and where do you hope to see yourself few years from now? What are you doing now? Making a relationship work is a collective responsibility. You guys should plan together on where to be few years from now and work towards it. Put away the idea of marriage for now and invest on yourselves. And lastly, 'close' your legs. If you no fit hold body, use condom. This is time to work for the future. Wish you guys goodluck.Thanks so much. He made a 2.1,I'm currently working too,buh I'm thinking deep on a handwork to do. |
Re: .... by bruf: 9:40pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
mployer: It depends on your reason for getting married. If you are looking for a ticket out of poverty, then he is probably not the right choice.Thanks so much. |
Re: .... by bruf: 9:41pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
dytbabe: Take it slowAmen,thanks. |
Re: .... by Kanwulia: 9:58pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
Nne! I have a cousin in your shoes right now. She married the man of her youth. . . . 3 children later, she is still crying because nothing has changed o. She is still bread-winner and the man is yet to get the 'real job'! It is rough! The man is now sooooo depressed with a sense of failure he does not even get out of bed anymore(BUT IS STILL PHOCKING WELL WELL AND HAVING CHILDREN O) The woman don taya!!!! She has to do EVERYTHING!!!! You might be favored to have a man that can PULL HIS WEIGHT no matter what. No one knows what the future holds. There are chances we must take in life. You know the possibilities. . . . No one can make the choice for you. It is your life! 11 Likes |
Re: .... by RoyalRoy(m): 10:18pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
enoquin : 1 Like |
Re: .... by Tvegas(m): 10:34pm On Aug 10, 2014 |
@Poster....I admire your honesty because you didnt pretend that you aren't tempted by the well loaded suitors. If your instincts tells you this man will come good then i advise you to prayerfully wait for him to get a good Job. 2 Likes |
Re: .... by Nobody: 1:07am On Aug 11, 2014 |
mployer: It depends on your reason for getting married. If you are looking for a ticket out of poverty, then he is probably not the right choice. Hear hear hear |
Re: .... by Nobody: 1:09am On Aug 11, 2014 |
Kanwulia: Nne! |
Re: .... by shizzle11(m): 6:17pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
delishpot: Hmn, if you guys marry and decide to put off having kids till you are financially stable then go ahead but if you desire to have kids asap biko just wait o. Hang in there and try to find better jobs and improve on finances before the big leap.One of the joys and blessing of marriage is fruit of the womb (child/ren). My point: let them have one child first and then like you noted, more can come when they have an improved income, who knows? that child could even bring them unimaginable favours, you never can tell, you need to look at the positives too. |
Re: .... by shizzle11(m): 6:18pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
mployer: It depends on your reason for getting married. If you are looking for a ticket out of poverty, then he is probably not the right choice.ENDORSED!!! |
Re: .... by bennyrazz: 6:24pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
Gboliwe:How could one chase a thousand and two put ten thousands to flight if their strong One had not sold them, and the LORD had not delivered them up? madam gboliwe |
Re: .... by Gboliwe: 6:26pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
bennyrazz: How could one chase a thousand and two put ten thousands to flight if their strong One had not sold them, and the LORD had not delivered them up? madam gboliwe 1 Like |
Re: .... by EfemenaXY: 6:53pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
bruf: Hello Family, With regards to this your tale, you have no control over what becomes of you both if you do decide to tie the knot. He might sit up and make something tangible of his / your lives, he might not, depending on his outlook, circumstances, and luck. You and only you can decide if it's a "risk" you want to take and work hard + hope for the best. What you can control however is to prevent both your lives getting any more difficult. Marriage is not about how soon (re: commenting that you're in your twenties), but rather, it's about how well (i.e: remaining happily married, irrespective of your circumstances). Babies are expensive. Naija is a tough, unforgiving place. My advice to you is to hold off getting married till you're both financially stable. You can already see for yourself, based on your older brother's current experiences how hard life can get. If you feel you can't wait and you really must get married, then hold off having kids. See, it's easy to say don't have kids but I'd like you both to really understand how expensive having babies can be, so I'll be giving you some maths homework: ~ Go to your nearest supermarket and find out how much a 900g tin of powdered SMA costs. Let's assume your baby uses 3 tins a month. Now multiply that number by 12 to get the total cost of how much feeding your baby with an average of 36 tins of SMA will cost. ~ Find out how much a box of nappies cost. Not sure of the local brands back home but you could try out a pack of 54 Huggies / Pampers nappies. Newborns use an average of six a day. So you'll need about 180 in a month - so that's at least 3 packets of x54 nappies. Multiply that number by 12 again. ~ Baby clothes, cosmetics (baby oil, shampoo, bath liquid, etc...) find out those too. Mind you, babies quickly outgrow their clothes. Calculate how much those will cost. ~ Now will you both be living with your mum / his family? If not, find out how much it'll cost to rent a one room flat and the utility bills that come along with it (e.g light, water, gas, etc) and multiply those by 12. Mind you, these are just the basics. Bare minimum. There aren't any luxuries here. If you feel you both you can cope with this, then okay. Somehow I doubt it if his 25K salary can stretch that far. How much do you earn (assuming you work)? Do you think your combined earnings would be enough to keep your heads above water? If not, then it's best you wait. Especially with having babies. No child deserves to be brought into a world of acute poverty where the parents barely eck a living. Be wise. 9 Likes |
Re: .... by beeevan: 7:19pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
Just be sure his love is real and not poverty induced because broke niggers sabi love. Give a man money and watch the real him unravel, its easy to discern how true the love of a financially comfortable guy is than that of a broke dude. . Please hold off on marriage for now and improve your means of lively hood. 6 Likes |
Re: .... by EfemenaXY: 7:32pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
beeevan: Just be sure his love is real and not poverty induced because broke niggers sabi love. Give a man money and watch the real him unravel, its easy to discern how true the love of a financially comfortable guy is than that of a broke dude. . Please hold off on marriage for now and improve your means of lively hood. The cynic in me finds it hard to believe that broke Naija dudes sabi love. |
Re: .... by beeevan: 7:46pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
EfemenaXY: Some broke ones pretend head over heels in love to have a sincere companion that really cares about their broke as s.once the sun shines on them, they realize that she doesn't speak with respect and doesn't possess Kim K's Junk. 6 Likes |
Re: .... by EfemenaXY: 8:38pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
beeevan: Haha! 1 Like |
Re: .... by ogawisdom(m): 9:06pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
He is not financially ready for marriage so dnt marry him until u get a good job or his finances improves whichever comes first. Love no dey pay rent, hospital bills, children sch fees, food, transport fare etc 25k can't take care of a single guy nt to talk abt family, its ur choice anyway ppl still live under d bridge n in uncompleted buildin 5 Likes |
Re: .... by KanwuliaJara: 9:15pm On Aug 11, 2014 |
Rich man o. . .poor man o. . . NAIJA man cannot love. Na CURSE O! NAIJA woman nko? ALOKO POVERTY! Gaga!!!!! Ask Chidi Mokeme, Dumebi Kachukwu, Jaleelee Disu, Emeka NzerIBERIBE. . . .and the likes! AWON GIGOLO DE AFRIQUE!!!! If you want love . . . . MARRY A NORTHERNER! At least, you always know where you sit or stand!!!! No faking! Ndi AGBEROS of SOUTHERN NIGERIA? Fiaaaaaaaakwa!!!!! Middle Belt is the next best thing if you can stomach their "love shiaaaaarrrring" without shiaaaaaarrrring BLOODZZZZ!!!! |
Marriage Tragedy: Married Man Dumps Lady At Ikoyi Registry, Steals Her N4m / I Am Confused On Who To Be With! / Trusted Nanny Agency At Ibadan
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 72 |