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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club (1359 Views)
What Open Marriage Taught One Man About Feminism / How I Resigned From The “one Man – One Wife” Club / Two Women Married To One Man (2) (3) (4)
How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by F00028: 10:34am On Sep 01, 2014 |
Maybe it’s midlife crises or maybe it’s something else, but recently the topic of polygamy keeps finding its way into conversations with my friends. And because I always insist that one woman was enough for me, they call me the President of the ‘One man – One wife’ club. But something happened some weeks ago that changed all of that. You see my preference for monogamy is not rooted in any belief in its superiority as a matrimonial system rather it is based simply on my fear of fatigue. In my calculation, if having a wife requires some considerable amount of work – you know, the kind of work that husband do on their wives (I’m trying hard not to be vulgar here) – then having 2 wives will automatically mean twice the work, 3 wives thrice the work, etc. and since with only one wife I am at a point of equilibrium, I felt getting a second wife will tilt the balance towards fatigue. And because I believe strongly that marriage is meant to be a pleasant experience, then there shouldn’t be any room for fatigue in it, hence my preference for monogamy. But apparently, I was wrong. Sexual relations had no respect for math logic after all. I was made to realize this first by a group of polygamists and then later by a published scientific paper. First the polygamists… Some weeks ago, I was in a conversation with some senior colleagues at the office (all of them with multiple wives) and one of them mentioned how his sexual drive effectively doubled after he married his second wife. [In case you are wondering why we were having that kind of conversation at the office, well, we were on strike then]. As soon as the guy said that, all the others supported him with similar experiences of their own. One of them, a three star General (that’s polygamists’ lingo for having three wives) said he is so virile now that he can actually service all three wives in one night. And he added, looking pointedly at my now incredulous face that he too wouldn’t have believed back when he had just one wife, that he would actually “perform” much better with three. He concluded that it was a mystery only Generals could understand. Apparently, having one wife didn’t make me a one star General. Then the science… A couple of days ago, I was searching the web for something completely unrelated and accidentally stumbled upon the findings of a research that was conducted way back in the 1970s. The experiment was initially conducted on rats but was subsequently carried out on other higher mammals all with very similar results. The summary of the findings as aptly put by Glenn Wilson in his “The Great Sex Divide”; “The males of most mammals have a definite urge towards seeking variety in their in sexual partners. If a male rat is introduced to a female rat in a cage, a remarkably high copulation rate will be observed at first. Then, progressively, the male will tire of that particular female and, even though there is no apparent change in her receptivity, he eventually reaches a point where he has little apparent libido. However, if the original female is then removed and a fresh one supplied, the male is immediately restored to his former vigor and enthusiasm.” That essentially was what “three star General” was talking about. Scientists call it the Coolidge Effect. It was named after the 30 president of the United States, Calvin Coolidge. It was said that the President and his wife were visiting a government farm in Kentucky one day and after arrival were taken off on separate tours. When Mrs. Coolidge passed by the chicken pens she paused to ask her guide how often the rooster could be expected to perform his duty. ‘Dozens of times a day’ was her guide’s reply. She was most impressed by this and said rather mischievously, ‘Please tell that to the President.’ When the President was duly informed of the rooster’s performance he was initially dumbfounded. Then a thought occurred to him. ‘Was this with the same hen each time?’ he inquired. ‘Oh no, Mr President, a different one each time’ was his host’s reply. The President nodded slowly, smiled and said, ”Tell that to Mrs Coolidge!’ And thus the phenomenon was named the Coolidge Effect. With this discovery there’s nothing left for me to do than to honorably resign my position as the president of the “One man – One wife” club. And in case you are reading this and you happen to be my wife, I’ll like to assure you darling that I am still a member of the club I am just not the president anymore. http://gainaako./2014/08/31/how-i-resigned-from-the-one-man-one-wife-club/ 2 Likes |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by asadike(f): 11:03am On Sep 01, 2014 |
Triple wives,Triple virility, triple children,triple wahala. They told u wot they enjoy, they didnt com up wit d many problems involved. U tink say u fit compare urself to animals? Ngwanu, go try am. I wish u gudluck! 3 Likes |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 11:16am On Sep 01, 2014 |
asadike: Triple wives,Triple virility, triple children,triple wahala. They told u wot they enjoy, they didnt com up wit d many problems involved. U tink say u fit compare urself to animals? Ngwanu, go try am. I wish u gudluck! GBAM!! All polygamists will never tell you the bitter truth. They all love company for consolation and encouragement. They will only tell you the vain aspect. The multiple problems on their heads they will hide them. What does that tell you about polygamists? Greed is their main reason for their status. they all see women as s*e*x objects and properties acquired to service their pen1ses only. Nothing more! This tells you why they are equated to lab rats in the Op. Pathetic!! 7 Likes |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by purpinkx(m): 11:19am On Sep 01, 2014 |
This sounds good , perhaps a little bit too good |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by SAMBARRY: 11:19am On Sep 01, 2014 |
Chaiiiii you have nailed it. Oyatake this new month present and use it to buy house in lekki phase 2 Sophyrocks: 1 Like
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Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 11:29am On Sep 01, 2014 |
if you're happy and you know it clap ya hands 1 Like |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by SAMBARRY: 11:31am On Sep 01, 2014 |
Ladystewie: if you're happy and you know itI have clapped my hands 1 Like
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Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by F00028: 11:45am On Sep 01, 2014 |
Sophyrocks:you have a very narrow construction of what marriage is. |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Edykul(f): 12:04pm On Sep 01, 2014 |
I was also expectin him 2 tell d bad aspects of havin more than one wife. |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 9:46pm On Sep 01, 2014 |
F00028: I understand how you feel. The truth is bitter and it hurts. pele. |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 10:14pm On Sep 01, 2014 |
SAMBARRY: Chaiiiii you have nailed it. Oyatake this new month present and use it to buy house in lekki phase 2 I wish this offer was real. 1 Like |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by F00028: 11:14pm On Sep 01, 2014 |
Sophyrocks:sorry for yourself. you think marriage is just about se.x. |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 11:32pm On Sep 01, 2014 |
F00028: Then you dnt even understand a single thing from my comment. So Tell me, why do men marry many wives? Give me very good reasons that make perfect sense and have nothing to do with the pen1s. Why do polygamists scream that they cannot be satisfied se*x*ually with only one woman? 1 Like |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by SAMBARRY: 12:03am On Sep 02, 2014 |
Sophyrocks:it's real na 1 Like |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 12:16am On Sep 02, 2014 |
Sophyrocks:My babe has spoken 1 Like |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 12:58am On Sep 02, 2014 |
SAMBARRY: it's real na Babe, na ordinary pic. Try make am real na. |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 1:01am On Sep 02, 2014 |
Kachisbarbie: |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by gidjah(m): 1:48am On Sep 02, 2014 |
I DO NOT THINK I WANNA TRY THIS,NOT NOW,NOTTOMOROW,NOT IN D FUTURE!this one that i have,i haven't bin able to manage perfectly yet |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by gidjah(m): 1:49am On Sep 02, 2014 |
IF U AIN'T MARRIED,PLS KEEP AWAY FROM THIS SECTION O! |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by SAMBARRY: 1:58am On Sep 02, 2014 |
Sophyrocks: [email][/email]it's real just chook hand for inside your phone screen or laptop screen and begin to pack as you like |
Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by SAMBARRY: 2:02am On Sep 02, 2014 |
gidjah: IF U AIN'T MARRIED,PLS KEEP AWAY FROM THIS SECTION O!wetin dey worry this one
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Re: How I Resigned Fromthe “one Man – Onewife” Club by Nobody: 2:10am On Sep 02, 2014 |
Having a multiple relationship is a big task on its own,having to checkmate the ladies to avoid collision,and having a good memory to meet up with many excuses,or lies told. Then I wonder what having many wives under the same roof would be like,can't just imagine that,it would definitely be an herculean task. My take- monogamy is still the best,no matter the spices the OP is adding of being polygamous in nature. One wife,one trouble,then multiply it by number of wives. |
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