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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Real Facts (1776 Views)
Funny But Real Facts U Must Know. / Some real Facts You Never Knew About Some Words (2) (3) (4)
Real Facts by eplazza(m): 6:40pm On Sep 13, 2014 |
1. Bleaching your skin is not a problem, the problem is having white face, yellow hands, chocolate lips and black legs. Are you zebra? 2. Kissing your man is not a problem, The problem is how you do it. Stop making sounds like a car crash "pitom pitom pitommi"! Abeg U de disturb me 3. Screaming during sex is romantic and its not a problem, The problem is screaming and shouting like crazy "JESUS,Oh my God,Holy mary" Hello.. You are having sex, Not a Church service! And besides I if its out of wedluck I dnt knw if yu are reminding God to punish you 4. Wearing short skirts or dresses is not a problem in fact its hella sexy, The problem is wearing your mini looking all nice and walking around and when you see guys you try to pull it down, Now you want it to be long?.... Abi.. Keep decieving urself na 5. Loving your man is not a problem. it doesn't involve me but the problem is changing your surname to his on Facebook. Bitch his mother doesn't even know you ...Chill!! And I wud hate to read ur post later saying MEN ARE WICKED OR CHEATS 6. Calling all men dogs arent the problem, the problem is tagging urself saint when you know he didnt Bleep himself but you.. So since you did it with him, kindly say I HAVE BEEN SLEEPING WITH DOG and please let us know the breed of dogs you came to the world from coz ur dad is there and ur mum have been his bed partner.. Gdevnin frends 1 Like |
Re: Real Facts by eplazza(m): 11:35pm On Oct 02, 2014 |
1.The whitest man on earth still have a black shadow. 2.No mechanic can repair breaking news. 3.No matter how tall you are, you can never see tomorrow. 4.Even if you have millions of cars, you still have to walk to your bedroom. 5.You, being the best swimmer doesn't make you a fish. 6.The strongest man on earth can never carry a Mansion. 7.The smartest Assassin on earth can never kill Water. 8.No matter how smart a police is, he can never catch the air. 9.No matter how mighty a man is, he can never be wise as King Solomon. 10.Going to Church or Mosque doesn't makes you a good Christian or Muslim No matter how powerful and dreadful 1 Like |
Re: Real Facts by eplazza(m): 4:56pm On Oct 05, 2014 |
(1)Only a courageous woman can fry a bunch of plantain without tasting any -Albert Macauley (1872) (2)He who says nothing lasts forever has never tried Hausa perfume - Nelson Mandela(1973) (3)He who completely unwraps moimoi and gala before eating cannot keep a secret - Abraham Lincoln(1864) (4)Any man that uses his teeth to cut shaki from pepper soup, with his eyes wide open, is not afraid of anything - WilliamsShakespeare (1900) (5)Anyone who graduates without experiencing a strike, has never been to Nigeria - Lord Lugard (1904) (6)He who refuses to regard agege bread and akara as a type of sandwich is a racist - Martin Luther King jnr(1788) (7)Any man who drinks Yoyo bitters without squeezing his face, is capable of murder - Michael Faraday (1899) ( 8 )Drinking Garri doesn't mean u're poor, but allowing the Garri to swell b4 drinking is poverty - Queen Elizabeth (1893) (9)He who runs around looking 4 scissors to cut indomine seasoning sachet is not hungry - Dr Nnamdi Azikiwe (1947) (10)No matter how hot your temper is, it cannot cook yam - GoodluckJonathan (2013). visit www.e-plazza.tk to enjoy more about exams |
Re: Real Facts by Nobody: 5:02pm On Oct 05, 2014 |
NICE |
Re: Real Facts by eplazza(m): 5:08pm On Oct 05, 2014 |
tanx |
Re: Real Facts by eplazza(m): 7:55pm On Oct 21, 2014 |
When I read this, I just couldn't stop laughing even though some may be true, but seriously its very hilarious. Please point out the one you think is true. 1. Woman is the last thing God created and the only thing he did not plan to create. 2. Woman is the first creature to disobey God. 3. Woman is the cause of all the problems, troubles we are having in the world today. 4. Woman is easily used by the devil. 5. Woman is like alcohol, if you take it too much, it will destroy you. 6. Woman is like cell phone, any day you press the wrong number, you will not make calls. 7. For woman marriage is business. 8. Woman is naturally wicked. 9. Don't take it for granted when a woman threatens you. 10. Woman likes money more than anything. 11. For woman,marriage is for better for stay, for worse for run away. 12. Woman is like flower, today it blossoms, tomorrow it fades away. 13. If you became poor, woman will give you only one year to recover. 14. You will never know the true nature of a woman until you become broke. 15. Woman can smell money from 1000 miles away. 16. Woman is like chameleon, she brings different characters. 17. Woman thinks straight. 18. Woman is unreliable. 19. Woman is proud. 20. Woman doesn't want to hear that you will be rich tomorrow, she want to hear that you're already rich. 21. Women like reaping where they did not sow. 22. Most times her Yes is No and her No is Yes. 23. No matter what you tell a woman, if someone tells her something better than what you told her, she will abandon you. 24. If your vehicle breaks down woman will jump out, watch you repair it, then afterwards she will come in and enjoy the ride. 25. Woman enjoys retaliation and revenge. 26. Woman becomes wise @40 27. Ordinary animal, snake deceived woman in the Bible, some people say it was Satan that enter the snake, that's a big lie,read that chapter, Satan was not mention. 28. Woman likes jollying. 29. Woman is fashion conscious. 30. Woman is material conscious. 31. Woman wants you to marry her completely so she can have right over your property, when you divorce her, she will go with 30 or 50% of your wealth. There is no truly born again woman. 32. Woman cannot do anything perfectly without the help of a man. 33. Woman enjoys telling lies. 34. If you don't take rubbish, please learn to take rubbish before you get married, because woman is full of fun rubbish. 35. Woman like cheating. 36. Woman is a perfect pretender. 37. Bible says you should not give yourself to woman otherwise she will destroy you. ( proverbs 31 vs 3) 38. Woman is shameless. 39. Woman will cause problems between you and your blood relatives 40. Woman take things for granted. 41. Woman finds it difficult to say sorry. 42. Woman finds it difficult to say I love you. 43. Woman doesn't believe she has to love her husband. 44. Woman is easily angry. 45. Woman hardly forgives and forget. 46. Woman can store more than 200 phone numbers in her brain. 47. Woman likes attention. 48. Woman likes gift so much. 49. Woman has no respect. 50. Woman can be very insulting. 51. Woman has shallow understanding. 52. To woman visitation is a business, she expects package whenever she visit your house. 53. Woman is very greedy. 54. Woman likes public opinion. 55. Woman don't like an intelligent man, she likes a man she can cheat. 56. If woman cannot kill you, you are a strong man indeed. ( culled up from The Zion Nationale Newspaper ) Hope you found it hilarious like I did. From my opinion, I wouldn't say the writer is a sexist, but rather a fellow who just got his heart ripped out and so turns his anger on all women. |
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