i am the first born of my parents but grew up with my mum because she separated from my dad when i was very little.ever since then she neva says good things about my dad because she also left due to domestic violence and her attitude towards me has been so unfair.she says negative words to me and condemns me a lot.she remarried later on and i can guarantee u that i love my step dad far more than her.at a point she succeeded to implant bad impressions about me and my step dad started behaving harsh to me too.

i have 2 steps which is a boy and a girl.my mum enslaves me for them in d name of being the eldest and she sometimes robe lies on me and accuses me of things i didnt do.sometimes she threatens she regret leaving with me nd almost burnt my result out of anger.
she refused to allow me go for one of my papers wen i was writing my WAEC.thank God it wasnt a core subject just because of mere accusations.

she curses me at evry slightest provocation nd talks down on me in front of my siblings.she neva appriciates all i do for her instead she condemns me more.

she worship d ground my steps walk on and allows them to have their way and do what pleases them even to the extend of controlling my step dad and encouraging my step brother to be rude to him.
all these and more which is what pushed me into the arms of wrong man nd i ended up being pregnant which i felt was a way of finally running away from my mums humiliation.

my mum stil caused problems for me in my marriage coz she wanted control my home which i refused nd it ended up in a quarell that lasted for over a year after which i eventually left my husband's house due to domestic violence back home.

am back to what i was running away from and it has relly gotten worse.each time she insult and say a lot of horrible tins to me that keeps me in tears. and make me know i and my baby ar burdens to her.
i cant even correct my junior ones anymore witout getting insulted in return.

am just doing everytin possible to stay strong for my baby coz i wil neva eved treat her the way my mum treated me. av been looking for jobs so that i can save up for my child and cater for her needs.

i dont know why she hates me this much.because my steps dont do more than half of what av been doing for her despite her attitude towards me.

how do i handle this situation coz there is no day that passes by that i dont shed tears.

Do you have a good resemblance of your dad?


If you have a job, move out of her house. You will be better staying alone than being battered with words daily.

Eiyah... ephee. I'm touched by your story.

Its good that you are looking for a job. I also think that you should be independent of her completely. Once u are able to get a job, get an apartment and stay there with your baby.

I think the problem is that she still has hatred for your dad and has transferred the aggression to you. May be she sees your dad in you. Most of our parents don't know how much damage they do to us through their actions.

Pray for her to change and don't stop loving her because she's still your mum.

Jisie ike.

bellong: Do you have a good resemblance of your dad?


If you have a job, move out of her house. You will be better staying alone than being battered with words daily.

not relly. am actually looking for a job that can sustain me nd baby so that i can save

bellong: Do you have a good resemblance of your dad?


If you have a job, move out of her house. You will be better staying alone than being battered with words daily.

Good evening sir.

So this kind of women stil exist? Be strong for your child, try get a job. Love and pray for her no matter how she treats you. Touched by ur story. Wipe those tears off and be strong

kreamidiva: Eiyah... ephee. I'm touched by your story.

Its good that you are looking for a job. I also think that you should be independent of her completely. Once u are able to get a job, get an apartment and stay there with your baby.

I think the problem is that she still has hatred for your dad and has transferred the aggression to you. May be she sees your dad in you. Most of our parents don't know how much damage they do to us through their actions.

Pray for her to change and don't stop loving her because she's still your mum.

Jisie ike.

tanks for ur response.av relly tried to do my best but she sees nothing good in me.av neva been close to her.instead i confide in outsiders.

Ephee, it is well with u. By God's grace u will get a job. When u do pls move out and rebuild ur life.

kreamidiva:

Good evening sir.

Good evening Madam... Quite an age.

Ephee,

You need to stop trying too hard to please her. If you keep doing this, you may lose sense of sanity.

Once you get a job, save money to get a place of yours and leave her house.

bellong:

Good evening Madam... Quite an age.

Ephee,

You need to stop trying too hard to please her. If you keep doing this, you may lose sense of sanity.

Once you get a job, save money to get a place of yours and leave her house.

sure.tanks

ephee:

sure.tanks

You are welcome.

Stay strong and sane for your child's sake.

Do not let the vicious cycle continue. Treat the baby with respect and dignity.

Need I say that you should find a place in your heart to forgive your mum. Her action is a misplaced transfer of aggression. She was deeply pained about your dad.

My dear sister, sorry about what you're passing through.



Is your dad still alive? If yes, go look for him and let him know what you're passing through because of their failed marriage.

Secndly, stop trying hard to make your mum liike you, instead, try to love yourself first, build yourself and determine to succeed so that she will have every reason to want to relate with you later in life.
May God help and strenghten you.

greatgod2012: My dear sister, sorry about what you're passing through.



Is your dad still alive? If yes, go look for him and let him know what you're passing through because of their failed marriage.

Secndly, stop trying hard to make your mum liike you, instead, try to love yourself first, build yourself and determine to succeed so that she will have every reason to want to relate with you later in life.
May God help and strenghten you.

my dad is very much alive and i living in isolation and regret.pride and stubborness made him not to look for me because he blived since my mum left wit me then he has no business catering for my upkeep except i leave my mum and relocate to live wit one of his siblings who he belived wil take good care of me.staying wit a relative was a no go area coz my dad's sister s hubby was alredy eyeing me nd gave me a condition on a note that i slept wit him befor funding any expenses which i refused.
my dad is also heaping blames on me for not leaving my mum to live wit him.

I hope you can move out soon. Am sorry for you.

bellong:

You are welcome.

Stay strong and sane for your child's sake.

Do not let the vicious cycle continue. Treat the baby with respect and dignity.

Need I say that you should find a place in your heart to forgive your mum. Her action is a misplaced transfer of aggression. She was deeply pained about your dad.

i love my baby so much nd irrespective of wat her dad did,i wil always be her best friend nd use my experiences positively. i dnt av my mum kind of heart

kreamidiva:

Good evening sir.

Good evening. How are you

No matter what you have been through,make up your mind the future will be nothing like it.
Getting a job and raising enough money to get an apartment for yourself is the best bet now.It will take you away
from all these troubles you face with your mother.

Do you have any degree?

Be strong, my dear
Be strong for your child
The good Lord will see you through this
'Twould be great if you get a good job and an apartment of your own
The sooner you move out of the house, the better for you and your baby

I sent you a PM

Bad woman persin. She has no right to do dat to u (transfering of aggression) what happened is between d olds nt u n her. Sorry to say she must be mad, for treating her 1st child lyk dat esp.a female child. forgive her but when d time comes dat she need u, let her feel d pains u felt n d ones u still feeling. Cos i knw she will come begging sum day. I pray u find a job.

ephee:

my dad is very much alive and i living in isolation and regret.pride and stubborness made him not to look for me because he blived since my mum left wit me then he has no business catering for my upkeep except i leave my mum and relocate to live wit one of his siblings who he belived wil take good care of me.staying wit a relative was a no go area coz my dad's sister s hubby was alredy eyeing me nd gave me a condition on a note that i slept wit him befor funding any expenses which i refused.
my dad is also heaping blames on me for not leaving my mum to live wit him.

sorry about this.
It is well.
God will see you through.
I wonder why God allow some people to become parents, imagine a mother transferring aggression to her first child because of unnecessary bitterness.
May you get your dream job and move out for good.

thorpido: No matter what you have been through,make up your mind the future will be nothing like it.
Getting a job and raising enough money to get an apartment for yourself is the best bet now.It will take you away
from all these troubles you face with your mother.

Do you have any degree?

tanks

i just finished my ond prog in bus admin at yabatech

zeemoore: Be strong, my dear
Be strong for your child
The good Lord will see you through this
'Twould be great if you get a good job and an apartment of your own
The sooner you move out of the house, the better for you and your baby

I sent you a PM

tanks.

i saw ur PM but no message. was attached

Wow. Looks like a movie. Tough times never last dear, but tough people do. One day, your kid will become an adult and look back on how life treated her mum and yet she was sent to the best schools.

Pray my dear, God will open doors. The rejected stone will be a cornerstone.

It is well ephee,i really find it hard to comment on topics like this,because for me the love of a mother knows no bound no matter what.

God knows i can't live without my kids,they are my world.

ephee:

tanks.

i saw ur PM but no message. was attached

I can't send you a message except you reply my PM

ephee:

tanks

i just finished my ond prog in bus admin at yabatech

okay.I know you can get a fairly good job with that.Keep hope alive.Send your CVs out.

Op,it is well o! The lord is your strength.

But some mothers sha... Smh

edwife: It is well ephee,i really find it hard to comment on topics like this,because for me the love of a mother knows no bound no matter what.

God knows i can't live without my kids,they are my world.

lucky u.i wish i had a mum i wil be fond of.

Gosh!
I can't stand WHINY weaklings!
WT HOLY F?

*moves on jejely*

What a mother! Pls be strong 4 ur baby. God is ur strength. She will come back someday on her knees begging U 4 4givnes. But pls I don't mean to disrespect her but seriously She don't deserve to be a MOTHER! How can she hate her own blood,her own daughter? Just bear in mind that @every end of a tunnel,there must be a light. Just cheer up n keep looking 4 a good job!

bellong: Do you have a good resemblance of your dad?


If you have a job, move out of her house. You will be better staying alone than being battered with words daily.

Same thing I wanted to ask
It looks like the woman is taking out the hatred for her dad on her
She ended up married to a man just as abusive as her dad and she leaves to become a single mother who will end up someday with a second husband and having kids that will put her child in the same situation she is in.
The cycle continues
They need to break that cycle or that child of hers 20 years from today will have the same complaints

Babes just strive to be better for urself and kid.me and my mom ain't close either,was the most neglected child but today, she see me and talk with respect to me.
Because I didn't depend on her for anything.
She would later in life come back to her senses,when her other kids dont regard her