Any man that can't provide the basic need( food, clothing and shelter) for his family is highly irresponsible and not also fit to be called a Man. Tradition demands that Men should take care of their family( wife and children) and also provide the basic need for them so the family can boast of a healthy and brighter generation.
The only exception to this is when the man is an handicap or disable or lost his job due to one reason or the other. But for a full fleshed able body man that can't provide the basic need of the family is worth nothing and grossly irresponsible. Infact he is a failure to manhood...
The Man is ought to be the head and bread winner of the home no matter how influential or rich the woman is... the man is ought to take responsibility while the woman is there to assist when crisis arise in the family. So when a man fail in taking responsibility by providing for his family, it simply means, the man has wasted over 15 to 20 years of his youthful period.
I wonder the type of generation such kind of man will produce, because the main factor that bring up a bright and healthy family lies primarily on the potentials of the man. Therefore an irresponsible man might end up producing an irresponsible family at the end, because such family will never live a happy life except with God intervention.
This is the reason while it become very necessary for a man to be resourceful in his youthful age by either going to school or learning a vocation or a trade, because with these the man can at least end a better life and produce a healthy family with great ambitions
Show me the caliber of a family and the nature of life the wife and children are living... I will tell you how responsible the man is...

Not everything in life is black or white, shades of gray abound.

There are a lot of other things that can make a man irresponsible and many irresponsible men actually hide under the guise of "I am provinding everything my family needs"

The men who sit in bars and beer parlours after work and sharing lewd jokes with his friends and his kids are in bed asleep before he comes back the early hours of the morning is iresponsible.

A man who abuses his wife verbally, physically, emotionaly, financialy etc just becasue he is the breadwinner is irresponsible

A man who has affairs all over the place and no Corper, new starter, student, trainnee is safe under his management is irresponsible

Responsibility comprises of a lot of things. Even men who talk too much, drink too much, spend unwisely and cant do anything without involving outsiders etc is irresponsible.

A counter thread.......

This is the summary of your thread, @op
1Timothy5:8.......
But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and he is worse than an infidel(unbeliever).

In your counter thread here,
https://www.nairaland.com/1927330/woman-cant-cook-highly-irresponsible, my stand is that, there is nothing wrong if men too know how to cook and carry out some housechores in order to give a helping hand to their wives when and where necessary, afterall, marriage is all about two people agreeing to become one and loving each other.

In this also, there is nothing wrong for the woman to give a helping hand financially, since the two of them are in the best interest of each other.

In conclusion, in marriage, both the husband and wife have to be responsible to each other in every area that would make them to be happy with each other, not only in food preparation by the woman and money provision by the man.
It is well.

In Nigeria, there are different definitions of irresponsibility.

There's a difference between 'cannot provide' and 'will not provide'

butanep: Any man that can't provide the basic need( food, clothing and shelter) for his family is highly irresponsible and not also fit to be called a Man. Tradition demands that Men should take care of their family( wife and children) and also provide the basic need for them so the family can boast of a healthy and brighter generation.
The only exception to this is when the man is an handicap or disable or lost his job due to one reason or the other. But for a full fleshed able body man that can't provide the basic need of the family is worth nothing and grossly irresponsible. Infact he is a failure to manhood...
The Man is ought to be the head and bread winner of the home no matter how influential or rich the woman is... the man is ought to take responsibility while the woman is there to assist when crisis arise in the family. So when a man fail in taking responsibility by providing for his family, it simply means, the man has wasted over 15 to 20 years of his youthful period.
I wonder the type of generation such kind of man will produce, because the main factor that bring up a bright and healthy family lies primarily on the potentials of the man. Therefore an irresponsible man might end up producing an irresponsible family at the end, because such family will never live a happy life except with God intervention.
This is the reason while it become very necessary for a man to be resourceful in his youthful age by either going to school or learning a vocation or a trade, because with these the man can at least end a better life and produce a healthy family with great ambitions
Show me the caliber of a family and the nature of life the wife and children are living... I will tell you how responsible the man is...

well said. Its true that they are so many things that can make a man irresponsible but while he his working on the other, these once are very important & he should not run away for this important once. I have always said it that once a man can provide a home & put food on the table he his good to go while also making plans for the childrens education.

real22: well said. Its true that they are so many things that can make a man irresponsible but while he his working on the other, these once are very important & he should not run away for this important once. I have always said it that once a man can provide a home & put food on the table he his good to go while also making plans for the childrens education.

I agree to a certain point. Yes its very important to put food on the table and provide shelter, but not at the detriment of other also very important things.

He is good to go because he pays rent and buys bags of rice, but what if he is a womaniser, brings home STD's and beats his wife? Is he still responsible? is he still good to go?

The only thing the OP focussed on was "money" and that is why so many women today are telling stories that touch; because they were only focussing in the mans pocket and his "potential"

Responsibility is all round . . not just pockets of it
I dont feel comfortable at the overall message that this topic is suggesting.

Dont get me wrong . .its a very bad thing for a capable man not to provide for his family due to lazyness or grandiose ideas.

chaircover:

I agree to a certain point. Yes its very important to put food on the table and provide shelter, but not at the detriment of other also very important things.

He is good to go because he pays rent and buys bags of rice, but what if he is a womaniser, brings home STD's and beats his wife? Is he still responsible? is he still good to go?

The only thing the OP focussed on was "money" and that is why so many women today are telling stories that touch; because they were only focussing in the mans pocket and his "potential"

Responsibility is all round . . not just pockets of it
I dont feel comfortable at the overall message that this topic is suggesting.

Dont get me wrong . .its a very bad thing for a capable man not to provide for his family due to lazyness or grandiose ideas.

I truly don't no how u view marriage but to me being faithful to ur spouse & respecting your spouse has no option in marriage. That is my mind set. But the area the op talked about its the man's decision. I just hope u understand what I mean.

Don't mind the Op.

He's just one way minded.if the man can provide then he's responsible,if the woman can cook then she's responsible.

What if they are all good in every other aspect but can't provide or cook.does that make them totally irresponsible?

Are those the only criteria for assessment?

@OP there are responsible women who can't cook simply because their upbringing didn't afford them the opportunity to learn and now they live the kind of lifestlye that makes 5hr sleep a luxury. So a cook lives in the house with them and does the cooking. And the family is happy.does that make her irresponsible?

While there are men who can't provide not because of job loss or disability. But for the simple reason that their efforts don't yield enough result. With prices sky-rocketing in almost every area and on everything on daily basis. Many men are finding stayng afloat harder and harder. So without an equal or even bigger contribution from their wives,the family will suffer. In fact switching of roles may turn out to be their best option at that stage because they just have to make it somehow. Does that make the man irresponsible?.if you're going to judge men like that,then you know there are many irresponsible men everywhere.

chaircover:

I agree to a certain point. Yes its very important to put food on the table and provide shelter, but not at the detriment of other also very important things.

He is good to go because he pays rent and buys bags of rice, but what if he is a womaniser, brings home STD's and beats his wife? Is he still responsible? is he still good to go?

The only thing the OP focussed on was "money" and that is why so many women today are telling stories that touch; because they were only focussing in the mans pocket and his "potential"

Responsibility is all round . . not just pockets of it
I dont feel comfortable at the overall message that this topic is suggesting.

Dont get me wrong . .its a very bad thing for a capable man not to provide for his family due to lazyness or grandiose ideas.

There are some men that fall into this due to one thing or the other, yet they still tend to be more responsible than those that can even provide in excess

greatgod2012: This is the summary of your thread, @op
1Timothy5:8.......
But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and he is worse than an infidel(unbeliever).

stop misquoting the Bible in this type of situation, what if he was sacked?

@op na so u wan mk front page again with ur "irresponsible" tagged topic

Oluwa naputam any man dat refuse to provide for the family
Most times women aid and abet this men to do poo
You give birth to the first child he doesn't take responsibility
Do not take in for the second :-/
Suse the damn contraceptive. Some men are internally useless
If you can't take care of kids then you don't deserve one
Simple

Rapsainot: There are some men that fall into this due to one thing or the other, yet they still tend to be more responsible than those that can even provide in excess

so mention the things that make then fall into the category... any full fleshed able man that can't provide such basic need is a total failure, no matter what... He is not worth to be called a man. He should ve been in his father's house... as far you can provide for your family... that's a step to responsibility... Get it clear...

sexybash: Oluwa naputam any man dat refuse to provide for the family
Most times women aid and abet this men to do poo
You give birth to the first child he doesn't take responsibility
Do not take in for the second :-/
Suse the damn contraceptive. Some men are internally useless
If you can't take care of kids then you don't deserve one
Simple

are useless when they are irresponsible for no concrete reason... you re kind of harsh on men

Rapsainot: stop misquoting the Bible in this type of situation, what if he was sacked?

That means you can't read very well. Read the piece, you will see the conditions...

This @op sef
By d way, i know a case where d wife is d breadwinner,hubby is at home. No job yet but a very good cook. Infact, he takes care of every every in d house.
I think i've shared their story b4.
And they r loving couple.

So i can now deduct d couple are irresponsible?

Hehehehee @op

*shakes head¤ when d smooth road of life becomes rough n the chimps r down...your wife now becomes d pillar to uphold n support you! Does that makes you an irresponsible husband? May God help us, in our thoughts and way of reasoning!

chaircover: There are a lot of other things that can make a man irresponsible and many irresponsible men actually hide under the guise of "I am provinding everything my family needs"

The men who sit in bars and beer parlours after work and sharing lewd jokes with his friends and his kids are in bed asleep before he comes back the early hours of the morning is iresponsible.

A man who abuses his wife verbally, physically, emotionaly, financialy etc just becasue he is the breadwinner is irresponsible

A man who has affairs all over the place and no Corper, new starter, student, trainnee is safe under his management is irresponsible

Responsibility comprises of a lot of things. Even men who talk too much, drink too much, spend unwisely and cant do anything without involving outsiders etc is irresponsible.

GBAM!! The Op would have added all of these you have typed. Being irresponsible isnt just about inability to provide, its also about your lifestyle. Thank you for saying it as it is!!

Chair cover why are you wasting your talent here. Go and open church. I will buy keyboard and drum set for your ministry


continue from where the likes of bimbo odukoya stopped abi don't you want to have private jets with entourage around you when you are moving around. No dey waste ya talent for nl.e no pass like this to be a London Big girl

So providing for the family is the measurement of responsibility?

So once he can provide,every other flaws can be ignored?

I know so many people that provides for the family,yet are good womanizer,and a drunk.

Op,please don't be myopic in your view,life is too short.

chaircover: There are a lot of other things that can make a man irresponsible and many irresponsible men actually hide under the guise of "I am provinding everything my family needs"

The men who sit in bars and beer parlours after work and sharing lewd jokes with his friends and his kids are in bed asleep before he comes back the early hours of the morning is iresponsible.

A man who abuses his wife verbally, physically, emotionaly, financialy etc just becasue he is the breadwinner is irresponsible

A man who has affairs all over the place and no Corper, new starter, student, trainnee is safe under his management is irresponsible

Responsibility comprises of a lot of things. Even men who talk too much, drink too much, spend unwisely and cant do anything without involving outsiders etc is irresponsible.

We don hear, we know and we agree to an extent.

I see how quick you are to jump on this thread to comment and outline numerous other ways a man can be termed 'irresponsible'. However the op again made valid points here, just like he did in his penultimate thread and like you rightly observed, it is not only the inability of a man to provide for his family that amounts to 'irresponsibility', in other words i agree with you to a large extent on the above. Need i remind you that this is a counter thread by the op, on his earlier thread to create a more balanced and unbiased view.
https://www.nairaland.com/1927330/woman-cant-cook-highly-irresponsible

While 'some' of your fellow women were blabbing all over the thread and some feminists at some point hijacked the thread with their inane outbursts, you were no where to be found to highlight to us other numerous ways a woman can be regarded as 'irresponsible'. (tell me you didnt see the thread). I sense the hypocrisy not mindinding the fact that i consider your above points valid.

My point is, you attacked this thread with so much energy and passion which we didnt see in the earlier thread by the same op.

Op again you made a good point, but like i said in the other thread that it is not only a womans inability to cook that can be termed 'irresponsible', a woman can be irresponsible in the kitchen but useful in other areas (even thou i also stated clearly that i cant and will never a marry a woman who doesn't know how to cook), same logic applies here. A man can still be 'irresponsible' even if he provides sufficiently for his family.

butanep: so mention the things that make then fall into the category... any full fleshed able man that can't provide such basic need is a total failure, no matter what... He is not worth to be called a man . He should ve been in his father's house... as far you can provide for your family... that's a step to responsibility... Get it clear...

there are some circumstances in which an able man won't be able to cater for his family.

chaircover:

He is good to go because he pays rent and buys bags of rice, but what if he is a womaniser, brings home STD's and beats his wife? Is he still responsible? is he still good to go?

Yes. He's still good to go. Good to go to the grave!

Rapsainot: there are some circumstances in which an able man won't be able to cater for his family.

so mention some of the circumstances where an able man can't provide, if not what I ve mention above...

Most of you guyz don't understand the meaning of IRRESPONSIBLE... please check your dictionary very well.
Any one that can't take responsibility of his\her duty or duties is irresponsible...be it a man or woman...
The main role of a man is to take proper care of the family... by simply providing the basic need of the family. So I see no reason where a full fleshed able body man can't provide the basic need for the family. Women are there to assist the family but not to take full charge...
How can a woman provide the money I use to eat, pay for rent and cloth my self... God forbid bad thing...Not when am alive. [/b]I must take charge of my family by providing the basic needs and my wife will be there to assist me not the reverse.
[b]I repeat, any man that can't provide the basic need of the family is not only irresponsible but a failure.. there might also be other reasons that can make a man irresponsible but this is the MAIN reason.

shizzle11: We don hear, we know and we agree to an extent.

I see how quick you are to jump on this thread to comment and outline numerous other ways a man can be termed 'irresponsible'. However the op again made valid points here, just like he did in his penultimate thread and like you rightly observed, it is not only the inability of a man to provide for his family that amounts to 'irresponsibility', in other words i agree with you to a large extent on the above. Need i remind you that this is a counter thread by the op, on his earlier thread to create a more balanced and unbiased view.
https://www.nairaland.com/1927330/woman-cant-cook-highly-irresponsible

While 'some' of your fellow women were blabbing all over the thread and some feminists at some point hijacked the thread with their inane outbursts, you were no where to be found to highlight to us other numerous ways a woman can be regarded as 'irresponsible'. (tell me you didnt see the thread). I sense the hypocrisy not mindinding the fact that i consider your above points valid.

My point is, you attacked this thread with so much energy and passion which we didnt see in the earlier thread by the same op.

First of all I dont have to open all threads talk less of commenting on all of them . . .Do you know how many threads are on NL?

Secondly I am not joined at the hip to anyone here, so that someone saying/not saying something doesnt mean I endorse it or disagree with it. . . . I can think for my self

As for gender wars, feminism or menimism, or whatever count me out cos I dont have time for it.

Of the people I love most in my life, I worked out that there are more men than women. . . I guess that tells you something
I have a father, brothers, uncles, brothers, biological and non biological . .they are all men. I have male friends too.

When I go to bed at night I sleep with a man

All this femmenism and menenism (I cant even spell it sef) is just internet mouth braggado to me . .. . Many of you go home to wifes, husbands, mums, dads, sisters, brothers, nephews and neices so I dont really understand what all the gender war is about.

I say it as I see it, from my own eyes; If the man is wrong I say it and if the woman is wrong I say it too.
Funny; yesterday I was accused albeit in jest, of setting the femininst movement back by years with a statement that I made & today its the opposite LOL

you are so into this gender war thing that you were unable to read between the lines of my post. I was in actual fact talking to both men and women In my second post which has not been modified and I was subtly pointing out to women not to look at a mans pocket alone as the only means of picking the right man but look at the man as a whole so they dont end up telling stories that touch.

It is well sha.

As for me I love men . . and women too and no I am not bi

SAMBARRY: Chair cover why are you wasting your talent here. Go and open church. I will buy keyboard and drum set for your ministry


continue from where the likes of bimbo odukoya stopped abi don't you want to have private jets with entourage around you when you are moving around. No dey waste ya talent for nl.e no pass like this to be a London Big girl

Muah Muah Muah Sweetheart
You still fit do me a favour
Dont bother buying me the drums . . .just send me the money by Western Union
God bless you as you comply