A friend of my needs help,

her fiance want her to help in paying his family's rent. the story goes like this:

she met this guy staying with his elder brother,his wife and her relations in a 3 bed room flat, the elder brother lost his job and he has been helping out for everything, even the food they all eat and he doesn't earn a good salary. he loves his brother so much that he couldn't allow him to suffer there by providing for him and his family, any time she goes to visit him she stays with him in that same house for loves sake.

he couldn't even save for himself, not to talk about renting his own apartment and he always talk about marrying this girl but with which money.

my friend works in a good company but has just 350000 in her savings, for all that she has been saving for a year now.

the problem now is, he wants her to help in paying part of thier house rent, the land lord want them to pack out this december and they are talking about moving to another apartment worth 350000

he has 250 thousand and needs 100 thousand from her, although he is not comfortable with collecting from her but due to the quit notice from the landlord and the short time given to them to pack out he has to ask her for help.


please my friend is confuse and needs help, she has just 350000 in her savings and thats all wat she's got in life,she loves this guy but they are not married yet. now when will he save to marry her, when will he save to get his own apartment. she is 28yrs and not geting younger. he is 33yrs.

please ur advice may help out.

i read this message with my boyfriend and he said she should pay it, for the sake of love

hey its for love let her do it
love gives and doesn't ask for anything in return
even tho' d guy leaves her 2moro
then d guy is not worth her

hmm,  ,  i think that is too much money to give out to someone she is not already married to, and someone who can change his mind any minute on the marriage.  it is her life savings. i think she should give him half or even quater, she shouldnt have even told him she has such amount of money. (she should have told him she doesnt have such amount, but she will try to see what she can do, and then after a while she will tell him she is only able to get half of it or quater)   though she might love the man and doing everything for him, the man could be totally the opposite and just wants her to help him out w/ his troblues.  is the man going to pay her back?  if i was her i wouldnt give out such amount of money just like that, am ready doing enough for him, i would help but with cautious, half is enough. that i love him or that we are in love doesnt mean i have to be blinded by it. hope she really thinks into it before making any decision because u can't trust anyone on their words. i'm just a little bit speketical about it.

d-baptist:

hey its for love let her do it
love gives and doesn't ask for anything in return
even tho' d guy leaves her 2moro
then d guy is not worth her

That is so true, love definately give and ask for nothing in return, she shoule give him he might become rich later in the future who know, no one righ? we cannot see the future :

right!

Le she do it with all pleasure, the guy's ability to provide 250k is enough encouragement.

DFACT:

, any time she goes to visit him she stays with him in that same house for loves sake.

Which love? some femanles can be so gullible sometimes. . .

DFACT:


he couldn't even save for himself, not to talk about renting his own apartment and he always talk about marrying this girl but with which money.

And your friend is even considering marriage. So what will they be feeding on. . . ten naira suya abi. Again the gullible issue. . .

DFACT:


please my friend is confuse and needs help, she has just 350000 in her savings and thats all what she's got in life,she loves this guy but they are not married yet. now when will he save to marry her, when will he save to get his own apartment. she is 28yrs and not geting younger. he is 33yrs.

maybe I didn't quite understand your story, because I can't imagine where the confusion is coming from. Pls advise your friend to think with her head for a while then the apparent confusion will disappear.

[b]hmm, , i think that is too much money to give out to someone she is not already married to, and someone who can change his mind any minute on the marriage. it is her life savings. i think she should give him half or even quater, she shouldnt have even told him she has such amount of money. (she should have told him she doesnt have such amount, but she will try to see what she can do, and then after a while she will tell him she is only able to get half of it or quater) though she might love the man and doing everything for him, the man could be totally the opposite and just wants her to help him out w/ his troblues. is the man going to pay her back? if i was her i wouldnt give out such amount of money just like that, am ready doing enough for him, i would help but with cautious, half is enough. that i love him or that we are in love doesnt mean i have to be blinded by it. hope she really thinks into it before making any decision because u can't trust anyone on their words. i'm just a little bit speketical about it[/b]

25%MORE,  thanks for d advice, but she said they are so use to themselves that he knows how much she has in her account and now after reading  ur post she regreted telling him.

well the problem now is for how long will her fiance continue to help in the family wahala, they have not even saved for thier marriage or thier own apartment.

and she is seeing everything as a aburden on them and she is regreting her goin out with the guy.

she is asking if she should quit becos it seems her fiance doesn't want to think about his own life, only solving his family's problem, since he is 33yrs and she is 28 they are suppose to be preparing for themselves.

i think she should ask the man point blank, "are we still getting married? cause it seems like all we are doing is taking care of the family/ i'm not aganist helping the family but, at least we should have some sort of own marriage plan ". cause if she doesnt ask the man he may feel like she has no problem with helping out./ and not worrying about the marriage ( which i think she doesnt  mind helping out but there is always that line) if the man starts giving yankee answer then she should have a plan B just in case.