[size=13pt]Darkrebel Vs Testerfuze [/size] (Group A)


Title :Lost In The Abyss

Description:Its Narrative.
Your verse should tell
*How you got there(what did you do which led you there in the first place),
*How you planning on escaping(getting out),
*or how you coping(having accepted the abyss).
Note: :Your verse should center on one of the above scenarios or all,its totally up to you(or what works for you).
And pls,your verse shouldn't Lose that Hip-Hop touch .


Criteria

Creativity-- 2 points

Flow- - 1 point

Imagery- - 2 points

Rhyme Scheme-- 2 points

Consistency/Topic-- 4 points

Lit Elements/Metaphors-- 2 points

Vocabulary-- 2 points

Emotion

Rules (must be strictly adhered to)

- 8bars/16Lines...

- Deadline is Tuesday Dec 2nd 4pm

- Verses should be posted by both contestants on
or not later than deadline date.

- No biting, swaying, stretching, feeding or
recycling.

- No complaining about votes.

- No dissing of opponent

- No unnecessary comments

Goodluck!

.

Lost In The Abyss

*SShit is happening here/

Know her mum died of AIDS...real disheartening death/ see am grave and crave....that y'all hang a sec/
for i ll' unveil the tales...of a certain girl/
who right from her birth/ wasn't armoured with wealth/ she was a gem in the mud....and a Diamond in Dirt/
And she never for once....was delighted with Life/ cos her entire existence......was battered and bashed/
and the cruelty of nature...had her blighted with scars/ and left visible wounds....indelible Marks/
Plus her Pop passed away....when she was 5 and a Half/
That's ten years ago....cos she's twenty now/ independent woman living.....in a Rented House/
'Face me i Face You'....but its fair enough/ and she always read the Bible....to Converse with God/ then disaster struck/ when someone brought the news.....that Mr Pat was rushed/ in haste to LUTH....cos he cracked his skull/ in a ghastly accident....on an active broad/
Recall she's orphan....and Susan's dad/ and his wife had died/....Mr Pat was the one....that had wiped her cries/
He had adopted her....also raised her up/ and he gave her love/ with priceless lessons...that made her strong/
But now he's dying in pain....now he's struggling for life/ now he grotesquely bleeds...in his sockets and eyes/
Its a 'Cold World' indeed....cos Susan's Cosmos.....is a bucket of ice/


*A million bucks for his surgery....the young Doctor said/ and then she flared/
"I don't have that amount of Cash"/ am i to lurk in Alleys...to stab a man/ with a band or gang / just to grab his bag?/ or am i to buy elastic Masks/ to rob malls and stalls....or hijack a bank?/
And the playful Doc said--....I really don't know....Lemme Ask Ifa/
* But no matter what....and how events had turned/ she was mentally strong/ and vowing not to quit..retreat or be gunned/ so she came to NL....soliciting for funds/
She opened a thread--...''Save Mr Pat"....but the mistress was mocked/
Cos the trolls came...with machetes and arms/ and started to rant/ saying-"Who's Mr. Pat?....we don't know him in France/
But she sucked it in....she didn't curse or panic/ they were so ignorant....of the cross she carried/ one even posted and said/-....How does this hopeless thread/....Affect the Cost of Garri?/
see comments like this...broke Susanna's soul/ and in an hour or so/ her Nokia rung/
Hello!!....what's the problem?...Mr Patrick is gone/
Now her world's a void..and broken in parts/ and she just can't still...let go of the Past/
She's mounting the stage/ maddened and raged/...like a Black Rhinoceros.....That's smoking em' Crack/
That innocent baby...is now crazy and obsessed/ and maybe possessed/ on NL she is....derailing all threads/ and says it revenge/
Even said to Seun ..you can't win this fight/
she even got some hackers....that work all night/ tryna crush this site/ saying if we had helped...He won't have ffucking died/
Now I consult you guys/ and to the questions asked...don't you ffucking lie/
just answer straight...is Susan right?/ or has she lost her mind?/...
is she in an abyss for real?...or is she Justified? ///

LOST IN THE ABYSS


This Life is a labour market/so what are we??...asset/
They say if feelings are so strong then its hard to lose a target/
But now that my tactics are stale/then it seems I've lost my way/

On the search 4 my "bowl-tin" (Bolton). all my life I've been a wanderer/
The early man rises into a conqueror/
Whr's my food for thought,whr's my prize for been a hustler/
Lost in the abyss,the earliest risers from the gutter/

Throughout my baby days,peepz know am a potential born sniffer/a drug dealer/
Raised among thug Niggas/
I c0.ck triggers/
Kill feds and cops leader/


Am gettin lost in this world of gays plus c0.ck eaters/
It keeps diggin me deep thus making me more bitter/
How I met myself in the abyss was cus I was a lost thinker/

Trapped in the abyss and lost in the underworld/
I was lost chasing chips when I shudda concentrated on the mother board/
My primary assignment neglected for another course/
On the other odd/
It looks am never comin out of this predicament like a traveller lost in no-mans land or the border shore/

The abyss ent safe,its rack city for young blood/
Child's aren't spared,they get beaten with long rods/
The fuze life conundrum/
How am trapped in the abyss on long run/

I'm gettin out today/
I'm finding my way/
Outta This abyss and back to the bay/
We only live once,no life's on replay/
So let a trial convince me to help fight my way outta this abyss and set my foot back on the clay/

Shame on the devil/
Am rising to another level/
I've been with you since eleven/
So today I'll push the pedal/
And elevate myself outta this abyss to heaven/.

#Rapberry.

Creativity-- 2
points- Darkrebel(mehn his creativity with the topic was cool,he knew it was 'Narrative' and he worked with it. . And added a few comic like the 'Ask ifa,France,cost of garri' NLanders ish )

Flow- - 1 point-Testerfuze

Imagery- - 2 points- Darkrebel

Rhyme Scheme-- 2 points- Darkrebel(tho its kinda hard keeping it clean esp when you Narrating,but Dark managed to pull it off )

Consistency/Topic-- 4 points- Darkrebel(Tester was consistent too)

Lit Elements/Metaphors-- 2 points- Testerfuze

Vocabulary-- 2 points -Darkrebel

Emotion- 2 points- Testerfuze(his was more personal)

12-5
MVGT- Darkrebel.

Creativity-- 2 points - Darkrebel (I like and feel that story gan)

Flow- - 1 point - Tie

Imagery- - 2 points - Darkrebel

Rhyme Scheme-- 2 points - Tie (both were not consistent here)

Consistency/Topic-- 4 points - Tie (both really understand the topic and worked hard on it)

Lit Elements/Metaphors-- 2 points - Darkrebel

Vocabulary-- 2 points - Darkrebel

Emotion - Tie

Mvgt - Darkrebel

MVGT = darkrebl.. ll Be back to it breakdown

Cool. Kr0ne, guykhena and co, pls try make the lines 30, to enable us spit enough ideas. . . Thanks.

GIYAZZ:
Cool. Kr0ne, guykhena and co, pls try make the lines 30, to enable us spit enough ideas. . . Thanks.

After this group stage. Let's make this thing move quickly. No time

kr0ne:

After this group stage. Let's make this thing move quickly. No time

They ent no way I'll be doin 30 lines kr0ne,am a very busy person wit little time to spare....I find it barely hard to compose the 16 you mentioned.