@ MaziOmenuko

Lol.

Don't mind those saying your girl is gone.

Far from it.

Women respond very powerfully to STATUS. And as far as she knows, her pastor is God's representative here on earth. Even, what other frame is more powerful than being God's rep?

She didn't really know what to do at that point - she was helpless. You can substitute pastor for Dad, but even more powerful (aka influence).

And unfortunately, you can't possibly 'compete' with pastor - his frame is too strong. You're just a sinful fornicator and pastor is God.

But...Mr Church Guy most likely will not be competition.


You can't do anything about it, they will get introduced, most likely hang out a few times. And if he's a cool guy, your girl will see him more, by herself - and without any compulsion from pastor.

Question is, how many really cool guys are out there? And of those, how many need pastor's help to get chics?

You see...

Don't get all reactive about this because its nothing new.

She meets new guys every day, all without pastor's help - and without informing them of you. But she still comes back because you are roundly her best option - currently. Same applies to you.

williams20:
...but she needs to let him know without smiling and without deceit that there is NO vacancy ...
QED

There is ALWAYS a vacancy.

ritababe:
if i be you i go just tell my girl to call the pastor right there in my presence and tell him i cant come because am already taken.

if you let her go, when she come back her character will change even if she refuse.

Unfortunately, I can't do that. I'll be giving @Tolexander a reason to say I'm insecure; and sincerely, that move will make it look that way.
She's mature, and I don't control her life that much per say.

@bolded, that's scary

My brother mazi you need to do a background check on this your competitor.1. His he richer than you 're? 2. His he handsome than you? 3. His he spiritually more sound than you're?. Before you let your babe go for the meeting.

BuddhaPalm:
@ MaziOmenuko

You made a lot of sense and I tend to agree with you mostly. She meets people everyday; some she tells me, some she doesn't. I don't feel threatened by them at all. Why I'm concerned about this is that she couldn't tell the pastor she was in a relatnship; you seem to understand why she wasn't and I tend to agree with you. From our discussion, I understand she was overwhelmed at the moment and couldn't tell the pastor nada.


Meanwhile,

BuddhaPalm:
You're just a sinful fornicator and pastor is God.

I'm born again - spirit filled, tongue talking, demon chasing!

Cholls:
My brother mazi you need to do a background check on this your competitor.1. His he richer than you 're? 2. His he handsome than you? 3. His he spiritually more sound than you're?. Before you let your babe go for the meeting.

If the answer to the 3 questions is yes, what happens?

Meanwhile, for the pastor to call him 'my son', then it means question 3 is settled.

Handsomeness can't be mentioned in the same sentence with my name, question 2 is obviously a yes!

Number 1 is relative; so without doing much investigation, the guy is already leading in 2 grounds

MaziOmenuko:


If the answer to the 3 questions is yes, what happens?

Meanwhile, for the pastor to call him 'my son', then it means question 3 is settled.

Handsomeness can't be mentioned in the same sentence with my name, question 2 is obviously a yes!

Number 1 is relative; so without doing much investigation, the guy is already leading in 2 grounds

my brother mazi I know people would call this cruelty of selfish motivation but I will still tell you to make every effort not to let her attend the meeting.

MaziOmenuko:


Lol...you really have to redefine this insecurity so I'll understand it better.

Does caring and protecting the one you love count as insecurity too?

OP, they r possibly insinuating a lack of confidence and a pretty jagged self esteem.
bro, dnt let that gurl go. gv it a gud fight, no matter what! 4 wat na?

MaziOmenuko:



I bind every negative spirit and false tongue in you right now!!!

Out!!!!!!!!!!!!

mazi i no go lie for you.....yes i said those points from people's story and experience, i have mine too.


Make you no let some of these so called man of God snatch you babe oooo.

They have done before. There was a case in my area, where a friend of mine was dating this beautiful damsel. She was beautiful. After dating for some months, we heard the pastor from church came to her parents house to ask of her hand in marriage. And i guess he has brainwashed her on so many occasion before she accepted to marry her (it will happen to your lady too if she attend that meeting).

The pastor later married her, but i repeat but, after 3 years she divorced him, she had a baby for him but she is now a divorcee.

Why?

She went after the pastor because she saw him as a second God.

But its been 4 years now she left her pastor husband and she is yet to re-marry. Now walka walka up and down she dey do ooo.

Boys go just give her small money later them go fvvvck her. On so many occasions this has been her life style now.

Many of these ladies cant think straight on their own, after some senseless decisions, which ur girlfriend would certainly take, they will regret their actions later.


Save a Lady today From being useless later in Life, Mazi.

Save your girlfriend from going into this part of regrets. You have brains, help her to think and make decisions for her. This is ur mandate.

Now is the time to show serious Jealousy, if possible follow her to that church and warn the pastor to leave your girl alone. Or you warn her seriously never to have any meeting with pastor.

The jealousy is not for but for her sake from making a serious mistakes.


Help her to save her from some of these men who are searching for a very beautiful lady to stand with them in their church ''Posters''. With the tag, pastor and pastor and mrs.


Fo it brother do it!


Goodluck

vhickky:

I'm glad you're delivered.

Go back sin no more

"A lady will always attract men".. Nature, naturally made it so.. If married women still get a wink/hi from men, why then not a single girl?

Every lady knows what she wants .. Our
quiet/personal time is always a period we use to access who really deserves our love, heart and commitment.. Your girlfriend/future wife should know what she wants.. All you need to do now is COMMUNICATE with her.


I see no reason why people should keep on giving Pastors preferential treatments.. For goodness sake, they ain't GOD .. We are all humans, and have got equal right to speech..

A conversation between my pastor and I:

Pastor: Sister, Happy Sunday.. Hope you enjoyed the service?

Jenny: Yes Sir, I did.

Pastor: You hardly come for services again.. Why?

Jenny: That's because I just gained admission, and I'm now in school..

Pastor: Congratulations..

Jenny: Thank you Sir..

Pastor: I have something I want to ask you..

Jenny: Ok sir..

N/B: I was just 18years old when he popped up this question.. Dunno if my body size was deceiving him ..

Pastor: Sister, hope you have found the will of God?

Jenny: Haaaaah!! Sir, I am just 18years old, and what is paramount to me now is my education, and not marriage or God's will..

Pastor: Ooogh! Really? But @ 18, you can start praying for it?

Jenny: No Sir.. It's not necessary now..
When the time comes, I'll seek God's directions..

Matter closed!!! He prayed for me and I left..

The message I am trying to pass on here is: Your girlfriend made a huge blunder by not telling her pastor that she is into something serious, maybe for the fear of calling her wayward or disappointing him but hell to the NO!! My pastor should be a guardian and not a match maker ..

Let her meet with the 'Son' since the appointment has already been made.. It's her Life... It's her Choice, Mazi.. You won't also be with her when other suitors troop in, seeking for her hand in marriage..

All you need to do now is COMMUNICATE.. Let her know your plans for her.. Make her understand she isn't wasting her time with you.. Trust me, your sincere assurances will keep/guide her anywhere she goes...

Sleekyshuga:
"A lady will always attract men".. Nature, naturally made it so.. If married women still get a wink/hi from men, why then not a single girl?

Every lady knows what she wants .. Our
quiet/personal time is always a period we use to access who really deserves our love, heart and commitment.. Your girlfriend/future wife should know what she wants.. All you need to do now is COMMUNICATE with her.


I see no reason why people should keep on giving Pastors preferential treatments.. For goodness sake, they ain't GOD .. We are all humans, and have got equal right to speech..

A conversation between my pastor and I:

Pastor: Sister, Happy Sunday.. Hope you enjoyed the service?

Jenny: Yes Sir, I did.

Pastor: You hardly come for services again.. Why?

Jenny: That's because I just gained admission, and I'm now in school..

Pastor: Congratulations..

Jenny: Thank you Sir..

Pastor: I have something I want to ask you..

Jenny: Ok sir..

N/B: I was just 18years old when he popped up this question.. Dunno if my body size was deceiving him ..

Pastor: Sister, hope you have found the will of God?

Jenny: Haaaaah!! Sir, I am just 18years old, and what is paramount to me now is my education, and not marriage or God's will..

Pastor: Ooogh! Really? But @ 18, you can start praying for it?

Jenny: No Sir.. It's not necessary now..
When the time comes, I'll seek God's directions..

Matter closed!!! He prayed for me and I left..

The message I am trying to pass on here is: Your girlfriend made a huge blunder by not telling her pastor that she is into something serious, maybe for the fear of calling her wayward or disappointing him but hell to the NO!! My pastor should be a guardian and not a match maker ..

Let her meet with the 'Son' since the appointment has already been made.. It's her Life... It's her Choice, Mazi.. You won't also be with her when other suitors troop in, seeking for her hand in marriage..

All you need to do now is COMMUNICATE.. Let her know your plans for her.. Make her understand she isn't wasting her time with you.. Trust me, your sincere assurances will keep/guide her anywhere she goes...

....yeah communication is the KEY but 2-way communication is d BEST

MaziOmenuko:
Its crazy how some pastors want to control the life of their members; I've had my reservations about their excesses, but right now, I'm very close to getting pissed.

My girlfriend returned to church today and engaged me in a long chat. She informed me that after church service today, her pastor had asked her to wait behind after service. This is not unusual as the pastor is a cordial fellow and likes to get to know his members, which is quite good if you'd ask me. This is like the third time he's asking her to wait after service for a brief discussion, other days he asks after her studies and to find out if she's still an active member of school fellowship and try to encourage her generally.

So according to her, he asked her to wait and she waited in front of his office. She had to be patient until he attended to all other members coming to greet him.

When he got to her, it was the usual inquiries and encouragement. According to her, after the pleasantries, he told her there was a very good 'son' of his he would like her to meet. By 'son' the pastor was referring to one of his members either in the church or someone he pastored somewhere else. He started by vouching for this his 'son', how he is devoted, God fearing and hardworking. He told her he would like her to meet this his son and give him a listening ear. According to my girl, the pastor even teased her that he, the pastor will like to be the one that will join them in holy matrimony because the so called 'son' was too dear to him.

He went on to make it even look like he was about to do her a favor. He stressed that he doesn't want his 'son' to be 'snatched' away by ladies of questionable character as it was not wise to be equally yoked with unbelievers.

Now, during the chat, I asked her what was her response to the pastor. This is exactly where I'm finding it hard to understand. She seem to be 'fearing' or 'over-respecting' her pastor and couldn't tell him she's already in a relationship. I asked her why she didn't tell her pastor so and she said she doesn't know how it will sound in the pastor's ears. Can you imagine?!?!

Now she seem confused as to how to disappoint the pastor and his 'son' as the pastor went on to schedule a meeting with them next week sunday as the supposed son will be coming down from one of the church branches for the meeting.

She put the question to me during the chat and asked me 'what will she do'. I take it that she's already made the mistake of not telling the pastor outrightly. I insisted she should have told him.

What do you think she should have done or not done; and what do you think is the way forward? I need reasonable comments so I will just have to post this page link on her bbm.

No damage has been done it shows that ur gf has some good virtue in her before her pastor could notice her. Neither d girl or pastor can be blame but it all depends on what ur gf wants . I once had similar experience with one of d pastors in our church that want me to meet a lady despite d fact that i'm nt in any relationship i didn't honour his invitatn because i wasn't convinced enough to have a relationship with her though d pastor later appreciate what i did . Your gf can visit ur pastor b4 d meeting to explain thxs to him .May i ask u have you really prayed that God want you to be together?

omojoshy:
....yeah communication is the KEY but 2-way communication is d BEST

That's why I said, he should talk to her.. Definitely, she'll respond..

Warlord3000:
No matter how influential or how respectful the lady is to the pastor...

She would have said an outright NO.. Am in a relationship reply . except there is a chance she is giving the new idea some thought and opened to it..

Nothing wrong in what the pastor has done so far to me..

But the lady not giving an outright NO answer looks somehow..

The bf better be ready for a surprise

This is like a case where someone ask Omenka to date a girl and he cud not to tell the person he is dating someone even went as far as agreeing to meet the girl. If its the woman how will she feel?..Not saying anything and agreeing to meet up with the person just tends to make one worry

Sleekyshuga:
That's why I said, he should talk to her.. Definitely, she'll respond..

We've talked oh, now it seems I'm pushing it. I know the next line will be 'Don't you trust me again'.

You ladies know how to use reverse psychology on someone.

Disraeli:
.May i ask u have you really prayed that God want you to be together?

You mean like ask for a sign from heaven to know if we're meant to be baa??

No, I don't subscribe to such.

mazi,

I totally understand how you feel.

first off, for your girlfriend to tell you what's on board, means that she is carrying you along in the relationship.

what I am totally against is her not telling her pastor she's in a serious relationship. I say serious because I assume you have nursed long haul plans for the future which includes her.

keep your fingers crossed and wait for Sunday. let her have that meeting and from the details of what would transpire would you make your conclusions.

prior to that day, take note of her attitude, mannerisms and body language. while we are at it, keep being you and love her the way you used to. if you decide to change tactic as to how you treat her, it would give her the much needed leverage to misbehave in ways you may not find uncomfortable.

we women can be that unstable when it comes to loving and emotions. not all women though.

all the best.

ps- na wa for those who fear pastors than the supreme being. after all, these pastors can err and are fallible.

rago:

.
bro, dnt let that gurl go. gv it a gud fight, no matter what! 4 wat na?

Bros, thank you abeg.

Right from the days of John the Baptist, the kingdom of God suffereth violence; and dem say make I no use violent occupy my territory?

We're now wrestling against flesh and blood in the form of pastor and his 'son'...no need to fold arms and play cool.

MaziOmenuko:


You mean like ask for a sign from heaven to know if we're meant to be baa??

No, I don't subscribe to such.

It depends on d level of your spirituality God stil speaks to his people. The bible says commit your ways to d Lord he will direct ur step.

MaziOmenuko:


We've talked oh, now it seems I'm pushing it. I know the next line will be 'Don't you trust me again'.

You ladies know how to use reverse psychology on someone.

Lol.. Weren't you expecting the question before? Definitely, twill come.. Sincerely tell her your worries and fears, and I bet you, she'll make you see things in a clearer way..

Accept with her, give her that 'benefit of doubt', and pls, don't PUSH it..

Sleekyshuga:
. Sincerely tell her your worries and fears', and pls, don't PUSH it..

worries and fears? This is mutual, I'm trying to protect her and us. Not just me.

lol@bolded, I've got to try

MaziOmenuko:


worries and fears? This is mutual, I'm trying to protect her and us. Not just me.

lol@bolded, I've got to try

All the best .. #Woman matter..

mencade4:
mazi i no go lie for you.....yes i said those points from people's story and experience, i have mine too.


Make you no let some of these so called man of God snatch you babe oooo.

They have done before. There was a case in my area, where a friend of mine was dating this beautiful damsel. She was beautiful. After dating for some months, we heard the pastor from church came to her parents house to ask of her hand in marriage. And i guess he has brainwashed her on so many occasion before she accepted to marry her (it will happen to your lady too if she attend that meeting).

The pastor later married her, but i repeat but, after 3 years she divorced him, she had a baby for him but she is now a divorcee.

Why?

She went after the pastor because she saw him as a second God.

But its been 4 years now she left her pastor husband and she is yet to re-marry. Now walka walka up and down she dey do ooo.

Boys go just give her small money later them go fvvvck her. On so many occasions this has been her life style now.

Many of these ladies cant think straight on their own, after some senseless decisions, which ur girlfriend would certainly take, they will regret their actions later.


Save a Lady today From being useless later in Life, Mazi.

Save your girlfriend from going into this part of regrets. You have brains, help her to think and make decisions for her. This is ur mandate.

Now is the time to show serious Jealousy, if possible follow her to that church and warn the pastor to leave your girl alone. Or you warn her seriously never to have any meeting with pastor.

The jealousy is not for but for her sake from making a serious mistakes.


Help her to save her from some of these men who are searching for a very beautiful lady to stand with them in their church ''Posters''. With the tag, pastor and pastor and mrs.


Fo it brother do it!


Goodluck

true though...

no solution yet? @maziOmenuko,

Akerry:
no solution yet? @maziOmenuko,

Update:

She didn't/coudn't go for the meeting; not because of the concerns I raised; but because she had other engagements to attend to over the weekend.

MaziOmenuko:


Agreeing to the meeting shows some sign of consent since she already knows the reason for the meeting.

That's my point; maybe I'm being biased because I'm involved.

no u r nt Biased...Since she knows the reason the pastor wants her to see his son,she should outrightly tell him she's Engaged....The only issue i see arising is the question of if you're the one meant for her....asin spiritually speaking nw.

Mazi,wetin come happen last last?