haibe:
the only sensible post so far. It amazes me how some ladies are telling her not to wash it, do we know what she receives from this man and why the man expects much?..

no, that post wasn't totally sensible I'm sorry. That OP was assuming too much lol. What if her man is not that nice and still expects her to wash when she's pregnant? Or his spreading his legs watching TV while she is washing under the sun?? I've seen shit happen in my life mehn.

Timbuktou:
You are the asinwin here. So, because women bring in money too, they are the breadwinners? If that's the situation in yoir family, too bad. I'm not the case of the familial failure you witness. Marriage should be symbiotic as courtship should be. Don't come here trying to sound more enlightened than you really are. Your foolishness stands out like a beacon.

*sigh* it's so difficult having a conversation with small minds like yours? where did I state in my comment that women should be the bread winners? And yes, women are the bread winners in some families which is not entirely a good or bad thing. Fingers are not equal, stop being so judgmental. If you are not the case of the "familiar failure", then you shouldn't generalize in the first place. You are being so defensive but if you actually calm down and reason, you'd realize we are saying exactly the same thing. Assuming only men put money on the table is misguided. And guy, I know you know biology and I understand the need for interdependence in a relationship or marriage. I was only correcting you about the money/chores equation. It's not only money the man can bring to the table and it's not only chores the woman can bring to the table #chikena

Helping him to wash his clothes is okay, but expecting you to wash them is a problem. My question is: Why can't he wash his own clothes? Hand dey pain am?

aisha2:
If you were my sister I would lock you up at home.
What are your own goals in life? Do you demand money from him?

Marriage or relationship nothing should be forced. You were not born to cook and clean, even if you want to it should be a choice and not a right. I learned the hard way, a man like that would always seek to limit you. He would want your whole life designed to run after him and worship him.

I don't know hoe you have presented yourself to him but I am uncomfortable with the idea of being in a relationship just so you get chores done or in a ladys case get her needs met.

He has been raised that way and if you are not ready to be a glorified maid to him and his family members, pound pounded yam manually, wash manually and do it all without a maid forget it. He will ask you to get a job like teaching or a shop so you can have time to be super woman. A man like that believes this is all a woman is good for. You dare not aspire for anything greater, having a career is out of it. Its all about him and what he wants

if only our ladies will reason like u.
someone once called me a feminist for saying something along the line of ur last paragraph.

crackhaus:

That you're 'a prove' does not mean it will work the same way for everyone else.

For all I know, your man could have thought about asking you to help with his laundry, but decided against it because he knew you would easily flair up as you did here, and use the opportunity to tell him to buy a washing machine he can/can't afford...who knows?

then he should wash his clothes himself or let me do it if I want to and not force me to.

All these galz wey dey give am advice say make she aspire away from laundry go do master, PhD, and whatever, check them for real life, na wetin dem no fit do for real life dem to dey advice another person for social media. I think seun shld make nairaland subscriotion-based so we can have serious ppl and comments here.

Washing clothes is manual labor, probably even worse than farming. I wouldn't want my girl to do something like that. Plus, I have LOTS of DENIM outfits. How can you make your girl wash 20 Denim Pants and still convince her that you love her? This guy is the real Casanova.

carefreewannabe:
You should never do anything that you are not comfortable with.

There is no right or wrong in this, to each their own but you should only do what feels right, if it feels wrong, then it is wrong.

bad advice

Wait you said you in a commited relationship, what do u bring to thr table

1.females enjoy cooking and cleaning its nothing
2. sex takes two its nothi


what other thing again?

I am sorry to ask this but how much is washing machine in Nigeria? Most of you can afford the best phone ever made. Even the ones Bill Gate uses but a common necessity like freaking washing machine is about to end your relationship. Where in God's name does that happen?

The OP is simply an embarrassment! You love a man enough to open your heart and legs for him but you can't wash his clothes! Are you nuts? Are you not supposed to be there for him? I hope you don't mind when he declines to do anything for you too. These silly Nairaland feminists sef! Many of you wash clothes for your Lesbian partners but you cone here to discourage her from doing domestic chores for her man. Hypocrites everywhere!

netizenbuzz:


*sigh* it's so difficult having a conversation with small minds like yours? where did I state in my comment that women should be the bread winners? And yes, women are the bread winners in some families which is not entirely a good or bad thing. Fingers are not equal, stop being so judgmental. If you are not the case of the "familiar failure", then you shouldn't generalize in the first place. You are being so defensive but if you actually calm down and reason, you'd realize we are saying exactly the same thing. Assuming only men put money on the table is misguided. And guy, I know you know biology and I understand the need for interdependence in a relationship or marriage. I was only correcting you about the money/chores equation. It's not only money the man can bring to the table and it's not only chores the woman can bring to the table #chikena

We are saying the same thing but you told me to shut up in your first quote of me? You are a foool. Why did you not realise that earlier when you came jumping like a castrated lizard? Gtfoh with your pseudo-intellect. You're not the first person I've responded to on this thread. How come I'm uncivil towards only you? Man, foh, your bs stinks. I am not interested in having any sane conversation with someone with BPD.

Wendy80:
Why shd you do his laundry for him? As what na? He's even angry about it. Better tell him to get a washing Machine for himself. A man who will marry you will definitely marry you weda u wash, scrub or mop for him or not.
I'm a prove.

that means you must be very dirty

netizenbuzz:


Oh please! cooking and washing does not equal love. Don't sell me that bullshit. One of the best couple I've met (a family friend), the woman never did shi shi. She had maids all her life. You should see the way the husband took care of her even though he was a military man (now retired). Been jealous of them since forever. It's just now that all the kids are grown up and she's less busy that she tries entering the kitchen. And even till now, it's just the cooking. Yet, she they travel out pass her husband sef. You know the funny thing? they never even had an actual wedding but still the love mehn.
That said, put in mind that different things work for different relationships. You just have to decide what kind you want to find yourself in 30 years later before you leap. Don't make cooking and washing a criterion for every woman. And stop making women sound so desperate to get married. Aswear, if not for this judgmental society, I'd rather stay unmarried.

Are you married?

Me?! Wash my boyfriend clothes When I don't even wash my dad's cloth and he doesn' force me to. One boyfriend will now tell me to wash his clothes for him?! Why are there washmen abi na washermen out there if he's too lazy to wash his own clothes? My dear, I'd wash my clothes and you'd wash your own or you go get a washerman! C'est finis! Case closed!

akpur1:
that means you must be very dirty

Shallow minded fellow

drlawizle:


I dont need to read any post below this to know this is the most sensible post...

If you really love your man you'll do things that'll massage his ego as long as he does things that make you feel special...

Love is about sacrifice dearie...and d sacrifice comes from both path...

Massaging a man's ego is the way to his heart but some ppl here will give you wrong advise...

Except the relationship hasnt got to that level yet...it should be a thing of pride for you...just as it makes the guy feel good taking care of you...

Massaging his ego by washing his clothes by force?oh pls!

dinachi:
The OP is simply an embarrassment! You love a man enough to open your heart and legs for him but you can't wash his clothes! Are you nuts? Are you not supposed to be there for him? I hope you don't mind when he declines to do anything for you too. These silly Nairaland feminists sef! Many of you wash clothes for your Lesbian partners but you cone here to discourage her from doing domestic chores for her man. Hypocrites everywhere!

you can make your comment or better still air your views without been so insultive and childish

Infact trade closed, thank you all for your comment and opinions

Timbuktou:
We are saying the same thing but you told me to shut up in your first quote of me? You are a foool. Why did you not realise that earlier when you came jumping like a castrated lizard? Gtfoh with your pseudo-intellect. You're not the first person I've responded to on this thread. How come I'm uncivil towards only you? Man, foh, your bs stinks. I am not interested in having any sane conversation with someone with BPD.

Now that I have calmed down you are still shouting like you are fighting with your computer. By the way, you were in no way civil with your initial comment. You sounded rude and disrespectful to the OP who opened this thread and that was why I replied you that way. And unlike you, I don't go about cramming others' username so that I can forever hate on them. It's childish, grow up. And your use of grammar lol, I've noticed you. Don't over do it.

netizenbuzz:


Now that I have calmed down you are still shouting like you are fighting with your computer. By the way, you were in no way civil with your initial comment. You sounded rude and disrespectful to the OP who opened this thread and that was why I replied you that way. And unlike you, I don't go about cramming others' username so that I can forever hate on them. It's childish, grow up. And your use of grammar lol, I've noticed you. Don't over do it.

Once again, you have proven how daft you are. What a civilised person should do is apologise, but then, are you civilised. I don't need to cram your name ode, unlike you, I have a memory good enough to spot you in a pile of shiit, which should be camoflague for you. But then again, you have to cram names to remember who said what, right?do yourself a favour, don't bother quoting me again.

DollyParton1:

then he should wash his clothes himself or let me do it if I want to and not force me to.

We are in agreement.

Kanyol:
Ogoanita, you should be talking of marriage now, ur no longer a small girl. U no dey shame? Which one be ur boyfriend and his dirty clothes issue??

who come be this again? U musnt comment in every topic thank you

If you can willingly do every other thing like u said,what stops you from washing his clothes? Pride? Since you said its a committed relationship,I advice u do what you have to do to keep it. Washing his clothes isn't anything big "unless" he is a dumb a*s guy that you know is not committed to the relationship or you sees no future with.

Ogoanita:
you can make your comment or better still air your views without been so insultive and childish

True to type! You are just an A5s. U can't hold down Ur relationship because of Ur lovers dirty laundry! U are not worthy of that guy.

dinachi:
True to type! You are just an A5s. U can't hold down Ur relationship because of Ur lovers dirty laundry! U are not worthy of that guy.

cant remember ever exchanging words with any female on any any social media talkless of a guy, woman wrapper keep ranting!

Weah96:
Depends on whether the clothes are washed by hand or machine.

If you wash by hand, then you're a big fo.ol. A grown man should be able to wash his own clothes without asking his wife to mess up her hands with laundry soap.

However, if all you have to do is sort the clothes and throw them into a machine, then may God punish you for complaining.

Loooool. Ds rily cracked me up

netizenbuzz:


if what will make him drop her for another woman is "washing", then that relationship wasn't worth it in the first place. *sorry just my two cents*

Exactly

netizenbuzz:


pls shut up!! this is the only argument you assholes of a men bring up anytime an issue like this arises. Who says every woman wants to be dependent on her husband? You keep forgetting that some of us have rich fathers or can actually stand and survive alone. Pls try harder next time an come up with a better argument.
Of course, I am one of those who pray for richer husbands. I pray that no matter how rich I become, I want my husband richer. Not because I want his money but to help me respect him better and for his ego's sake.

1000 likes for this. U too make sense . Tell them oh

Timbuktou:
Once again, you have proven how daft you are. What a civilised person should do is apologise, but then, are you civilised. I don't need to cram your name ode, unlike you, I have a memory good enough to spot you in a pile of shiit, which should be camoflague for you. But then again, you have to cram names to remember who said what, right?do yourself a favour, don't bother quoting me again.

and you are........civilized? LMAO............I don't owe you an apology angry dude. If you apologize for being disrespectful to the OP, then I'll apologize for calling out your bullshit. Till then #bye

Ogoanita:
cant remember ever exchanging words with any female on any any social media talkless of a guy, woman wrapper keep ranting!

U are dense! When I saw Ur profile picture, I realized why you asked your question. Sorry to break it to you but you are totally unintelligent. U have no business being in a relationship, you need medical attention. Man Wrapper.

dinachi:
U are dense! When I saw Ur profile picture, I realized why you asked your question. Sorry to break it to you but you are totally unintelligent. U have no business being in a relationship, you need medical attention. Man Wrapper.

Keep ranting!