Funny stuff. Happy new year people.

I've always talked about this. nigerians won't face the real issue and solve their problems but will lie against the devil or enemies.
any terrible decision one makes it is the devil/enemies.
really it's the pastors that encourage the nonsense. I remember one pastor saying sleep paralysis is an attack. I read about it and was angry, as of now I rarely believe what the pastor says once they mention enemies/devil

Hilarious indeed!

But Harrychocoberry, you wouldn't blame Nigerians for having such 'my enemies' mentality because so many Nigerians are religious and there is a strong correlation between being religious and being fearful.

And when someone is inherently in a constant state of fear, consciously or otherwise, as in being paranoid, they tend to believe all sorts of boolsheet!

Its just a reflection of the societal rot, many people no longer use their God giving brain anymore; some erroneously say its faith.

i noticed the long silence of an slowpoke guy in my area so when I met witg him, I asked him why I hadn't seen him for some time, he simply replied that he was sick because some people were after him from the village. I watched him while he was speaking with all the saliva dripping from his mouth and was wondering who will want him dead in his village. if an slowpoke will have such a thought then what ll do normal ppl reason abt enemies frm d village?

Bro your write up is the bomb.
Too many a times we spend less time praising God for What He has done and much more time pursuing a non existent enemy.

Harry will be the 2nd person to emphasize diz (to me)....let's just chill
Do what is right,no lie,no steal,no do bad,which you possibly can't do without doing,even if na chikini....law of karma is no joke.
Inbetween:only dead body no dey face difficulties..
AirAsia disaster(RIP to d dead),shey na enemy cause am!!!Abegi let's pray nd live right

People speak what they experience!

I also think many people waste productive times bothering about enemies.
Sometimes, I see people who have lived in the West all their lives come and say voodoo/wichcraft don't exist and I just smile, because they know nothing about the African way of life.

I could recount a personal experience from my family, that will only be denied if you have closed your mind to reason just to gratify your claim to smartness!

Christians overkill these issues anyways with 24/7 enemy consciousness giving room to fear and illogical reasoning and decisions..

You see young graduates praying round the clock, instead of stepping out to get that dream job.

tebirim:
So you want me to read all that? You dey pay me? ... Na wa for hommies this new year ooo

Lol op is an enemy of progressential. He wants us stuck on thisale thread

dbaptist1:
Bro your write up is the bomb.
Too many a times we spend less time praising God for What He has done and much more time pursuing a non existent enemy.

The horrible thing is people with this hyper enemy consciousness almost never end up at the top.
Fear has ruined them!

Harrychocoberry:


Nope..I don't have a blog.
I once had but it's no more in existence.
Thanks for the compliment.

I need to keep track of you. Could you drop your email here? It's a youth movement, nothing weird lol.
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1n61hnVoHieq2e8hgyAyG-h22hwtH5uUGhkL4JQiPAAs/viewform

Oh and you're welcome

OmolodMilkman93:
harry and his hilarious posts,...

what is hilarious and humiliating is the so called educated nigerians, voting illitrate into power.

Harrychocoberry sir, biko whats the meaning of Jand? Thanks

Bifwoli:


Don't fear your enemies that attack you,

fear the fake friends that hug you.

like Brutus and Julius Cesar

dbaptist1:
Bro your write up is the bomb.
Too many a times we spend less time praising God for What He has done and much more time pursuing a non existent enemy.

you are over 100% right.
I award you Nairaland Man of The New Year ( NMNY )

Matchable poisons are real

Enemies are for real too

Those who can monitor and prevent success are real too


But not every evil is caused by enemies

Sometimes , stubbornness , carelessness or even non challant attitude towards daily minuscule warnings can have a larger , bigger / worse outcome

Harrychocoberry:
"MY ENEMIES ARE AT WORK"

A former work-mate Jay was giving me the low-down about something that happened to him recently.

A while back, he had attended an 'awesome' Halloween party, and had decided to go as a traditional masquerade. Ingenious right?

Jay brought the mask back home after the party, and hung it as a decoration on his room wall. It was a really grotesque mask – just imagine the alien’s face in the movie Predator. I chided him for hanging up the mask in his room, as it stuck out like a sore thumb, spoiling the overall décor of the place.

Fast forward, a month later, he pulled this really hot chick when he met at a wedding in Ph. They spoke on the phone for days, and then she promised to come visit him one Saturday.

Jay got the place ready for the lass’s visit. He tried to make the pad ‘condusive’.

He took out the sofa from the room, so that the girl would have to sit on the bed.

He turned down the thermostat on his split unit AC so that the place was very chilly, in case his female visitor required ‘warming’.

He ‘arranged’ condoms at every nook and cranny of his pad, to be ready whenever or wherever it went down. He put one on the bedroom dresser, put another under one of the pillows, one on the window seal, another in his pocket, two behind the television unit.

He warned the gateman not to leave his post, to prevent a mix-up.

He did some push-up, pull-ups and bicep curls with really heavy weights. Then he showered, dressed up and sprayed a healthy dose of Pleasures for Men by Estee Lauder.

The girl finally came around 2pm (African time), wearing a really smart tank top, some skin-fitting jeans and some really nice shoes. Jay was like wow! Jay said that she had a figure like a palm-wine keg. 

They chatted a bit, dug into some take-away that Jay had sent his house-boy for, and even watched a bit of the rom-com “Notting Hill”. By the time the part of the movie where Hugh Grant and Julia Robert’s characters climbed a wall into a garden came, Jay and his date had started snogging.

They were making out just fine, almost heading for a technical knock-out, when the girl looked up and noticed the mask.

Jay said that the way this girl flew out of his arms and bed was like a scene from Matrix where Keanu Reeves did a limbo type movement to dodge a bullet in slow motion.
(sorry o,I don't watch nollywood movies)

Her voice trembling, she shreiked ‘What is that? Is that ojuju?”

Jay tried to explain calmly “Nah, love. It is just a simple Halloween mask.”

The girl was not convinced. She moved towards the door. “What is a grotesque mask doing on your wall? What is it? There must be something wrong with you”

Jay tried to explain to this chick and allay her fears. She nor gree o. The die was cast – she even refused to finish the movie. After a while, she received a ‘phantom’ call from her bestie, and said she had to meet her cousin in Rumuokwuta. She bounced out of the crib like she was running from something.

Jay was left with a bruised ego and the damn mask on the wall. He took it down from the wall, and hung it in his living room instead. Let it bother uninvited guests now instead. Like the landlord and his agents.

In Nigeria, people dey fear. And most tragedies are usually blamed on one’s perceived enemies. If a politician got caught in EFCC’s net for misappropriating public funds; he would usually blame it on perceived enemies who are ‘intimidated by his profile.’

A neighbor’s son got caught with stolen car parts. His ma threw herself on the floor, rolling as she cried '‘My enemies have finally gotten me. Mo ti ku o…”

And at that point, I felt like defending her so-called enemies. I could swear I never saw anyone else with her son, when he living it up, blowing money fast. Even his friends would have been weak.

There was a program on TV sometime where a guy said he had just recovered from an ailment. According to him, he had ‘stepped’ on poison which had been an entrapment by his ‘enemies’, and had fallen ill. And I am like, wait a Nigerian minute (which is long by the way if you add African time), which one is ‘step on poison’ again? I never knew people could actually ‘step’ on poison? I thought they just put it in your food or beer, when you stepped away briefly to the loo. Or is there Wi-fi or Bluetooth poison now? But it made me realize how Nigerians feared their enemies.

Sometimes in some quarters, if a person bought a new/used (or Tokunboh or Belgium) automobile in Nigeria, family members would gather and make professions, pouring libations on the tires to ward off enemies.

May you trample over your foes with these big-ass 17 inch rims.

May you never ride shot-gun while your enemies are handling the steering wheel. If it is my Bentley, I don’t mind actually.

May you see your enemies in your rear-view and never with your head-lights.

May your enemies be forever in your boot, but never in your bonnet? Don’t say amen here o. Some Ferraris and Lambos have their engines in the trunk instead.

Someone even prayed: May you never go backwards as you drive this car. All well and good, but you still need to reverse out of this tight-ass parking lot after these prayers end.

At church you could see members of the congregation tapping away on their blackberry or catching 40 winks(sleeping) or scoping flesh lustfully, but as soon as the pastor starts prayers binding and destroying enemies, everyone springs to attention with the chorus of a resounding Amen! And why not; your enemies may park behind you on the church car park, and be no-where to be found after service ends to start with.

If every person has enemies, then that means everyone is somehow an enemy to someone right? Then who are the good people then? Am I someone’s enemy even though I wish no man any evil? Haba, na wetin? My take is that everyone who has a village must have enemies.

Think well. Your enemies checked your SSCE, NECO and JAMB results before you did. They are the ones you hid information from when you got a visa for Jand (even the 3 month one).Your enemies were the last to know when you were interviewing for that choice job, but were the first to know when you landed that lucrative contract. If there is a way to trace your facebook page visitors (like Hi-5 used to have, and Linked-In does), you would see that your enemies check on you 24/7.

If the enemy of my enemy is my friend, should I really be hating and cursing him too?

All these postulations and theories are giving me malaria, abeg. As I go to cool off with some tender cow-leg pepper soup (okay this too is hot), let me pray for each and every one of my dear readers as you're about to enter the 'New Year';

May your pain be champagne.

If you are Fanta Chapman just out of the fridge, your enemies would be Limca in a 23cl ‘solo’ bottle straight from the crate.(dat drink still dey exist).

If you are a Mercedes G Wagon from a V.I. dealership, your enemies would be a Danfo Racer old model with a “For Sale” jerry-can on it.

If you are a Hollywood blockbuster starring Steven Seagul your foes would be a Yoruba movie with wrong English subtitles and gold tooth alatikas.

If you are a Celebrity poker game on ESPN, your enemies would be a local game of Ludo with 2 of the red and green seeds missing and the glass broken.

If you are a packet of Chivita juice, your enemies would be an agbalumon seed spat on the ground.

If you are a Transformers (movie), your enemies would be NEPA transformers with the mercury missing.

* Just joking, but I wish you all well. God bless.

Cc:
Safarigirl
Karchiebabe
Seun
Larrysun
D9ty7
Tosyn2much

#stillThaNewGuyHARRY#
•Chocoberry•

Timaya has the greatest expression of that in his songs, lol.

dem youruba and english nollywood movies are responsible for propagating this sick enemies mentality among the Nigerian populace. even Durrella sang a song titled 'Enemies!'. Smh.

Harrychocoberry:
"MY ENEMIES ARE AT WORK"

A former work-mate Jay was giving me the low-down about something that happened to him recently.

A while back, he had attended an 'awesome' Halloween party, and had decided to go as a traditional masquerade. Ingenious right?

Jay brought the mask back home after the party, and hung it as a decoration on his room wall. It was a really grotesque mask – just imagine the alien’s face in the movie Predator. I chided him for hanging up the mask in his room, as it stuck out like a sore thumb, spoiling the overall décor of the place.

Fast forward, a month later, he pulled this really hot chick when he met at a wedding in Ph. They spoke on the phone for days, and then she promised to come visit him one Saturday.

Jay got the place ready for the lass’s visit. He tried to make the pad ‘condusive’.

He took out the sofa from the room, so that the girl would have to sit on the bed.

He turned down the thermostat on his split unit AC so that the place was very chilly, in case his female visitor required ‘warming’.

He ‘arranged’ condoms at every nook and cranny of his pad, to be ready whenever or wherever it went down. He put one on the bedroom dresser, put another under one of the pillows, one on the window seal, another in his pocket, two behind the television unit.

He warned the gateman not to leave his post, to prevent a mix-up.

He did some push-up, pull-ups and bicep curls with really heavy weights. Then he showered, dressed up and sprayed a healthy dose of Pleasures for Men by Estee Lauder.

The girl finally came around 2pm (African time), wearing a really smart tank top, some skin-fitting jeans and some really nice shoes. Jay was like wow! Jay said that she had a figure like a palm-wine keg. 

They chatted a bit, dug into some take-away that Jay had sent his house-boy for, and even watched a bit of the rom-com “Notting Hill”. By the time the part of the movie where Hugh Grant and Julia Robert’s characters climbed a wall into a garden came, Jay and his date had started snogging.

They were making out just fine, almost heading for a technical knock-out, when the girl looked up and noticed the mask.

Jay said that the way this girl flew out of his arms and bed was like a scene from Matrix where Keanu Reeves did a limbo type movement to dodge a bullet in slow motion.
(sorry o,I don't watch nollywood movies)

Her voice trembling, she shreiked ‘What is that? Is that ojuju?”

Jay tried to explain calmly “Nah, love. It is just a simple Halloween mask.”

The girl was not convinced. She moved towards the door. “What is a grotesque mask doing on your wall? What is it? There must be something wrong with you”

Jay tried to explain to this chick and allay her fears. She nor gree o. The die was cast – she even refused to finish the movie. After a while, she received a ‘phantom’ call from her bestie, and said she had to meet her cousin in Rumuokwuta. She bounced out of the crib like she was running from something.

Jay was left with a bruised ego and the damn mask on the wall. He took it down from the wall, and hung it in his living room instead. Let it bother uninvited guests now instead. Like the landlord and his agents.

In Nigeria, people dey fear. And most tragedies are usually blamed on one’s perceived enemies. If a politician got caught in EFCC’s net for misappropriating public funds; he would usually blame it on perceived enemies who are ‘intimidated by his profile.’

A neighbor’s son got caught with stolen car parts. His ma threw herself on the floor, rolling as she cried '‘My enemies have finally gotten me. Mo ti ku o…”

And at that point, I felt like defending her so-called enemies. I could swear I never saw anyone else with her son, when he living it up, blowing money fast. Even his friends would have been weak.

There was a program on TV sometime where a guy said he had just recovered from an ailment. According to him, he had ‘stepped’ on poison which had been an entrapment by his ‘enemies’, and had fallen ill. And I am like, wait a Nigerian minute (which is long by the way if you add African time), which one is ‘step on poison’ again? I never knew people could actually ‘step’ on poison? I thought they just put it in your food or beer, when you stepped away briefly to the loo. Or is there Wi-fi or Bluetooth poison now? But it made me realize how Nigerians feared their enemies.

Sometimes in some quarters, if a person bought a new/used (or Tokunboh or Belgium) automobile in Nigeria, family members would gather and make professions, pouring libations on the tires to ward off enemies.

May you trample over your foes with these big-ass 17 inch rims.

May you never ride shot-gun while your enemies are handling the steering wheel. If it is my Bentley, I don’t mind actually.

May you see your enemies in your rear-view and never with your head-lights.

May your enemies be forever in your boot, but never in your bonnet? Don’t say amen here o. Some Ferraris and Lambos have their engines in the trunk instead.

Someone even prayed: May you never go backwards as you drive this car. All well and good, but you still need to reverse out of this tight-ass parking lot after these prayers end.

At church you could see members of the congregation tapping away on their blackberry or catching 40 winks(sleeping) or scoping flesh lustfully, but as soon as the pastor starts prayers binding and destroying enemies, everyone springs to attention with the chorus of a resounding Amen! And why not; your enemies may park behind you on the church car park, and be no-where to be found after service ends to start with.

If every person has enemies, then that means everyone is somehow an enemy to someone right? Then who are the good people then? Am I someone’s enemy even though I wish no man any evil? Haba, na wetin? My take is that everyone who has a village must have enemies.

Think well. Your enemies checked your SSCE, NECO and JAMB results before you did. They are the ones you hid information from when you got a visa for Jand (even the 3 month one).Your enemies were the last to know when you were interviewing for that choice job, but were the first to know when you landed that lucrative contract. If there is a way to trace your facebook page visitors (like Hi-5 used to have, and Linked-In does), you would see that your enemies check on you 24/7.

If the enemy of my enemy is my friend, should I really be hating and cursing him too?

All these postulations and theories are giving me malaria, abeg. As I go to cool off with some tender cow-leg pepper soup (okay this too is hot), let me pray for each and every one of my dear readers as you're about to enter the 'New Year';

May your pain be champagne.

If you are Fanta Chapman just out of the fridge, your enemies would be Limca in a 23cl ‘solo’ bottle straight from the crate.(dat drink still dey exist).

If you are a Mercedes G Wagon from a V.I. dealership, your enemies would be a Danfo Racer old model with a “For Sale” jerry-can on it.

If you are a Hollywood blockbuster starring Steven Seagul your foes would be a Yoruba movie with wrong English subtitles and gold tooth alatikas.

If you are a Celebrity poker game on ESPN, your enemies would be a local game of Ludo with 2 of the red and green seeds missing and the glass broken.

If you are a packet of Chivita juice, your enemies would be an agbalumon seed spat on the ground.

If you are a Transformers (movie), your enemies would be NEPA transformers with the mercury missing.

* Just joking, but I wish you all well. God bless.

Cc:
Safarigirl
Karchiebabe
Seun
Larrysun
D9ty7
Tosyn2much

#stillThaNewGuyHARRY#
•Chocoberry•

My brother the people who don't even believe in these ''my enemies'' of a thing have a better life than poor impoverished Africans and Nigerians.
It is a serious matter when people will choose not to take responsibility for their actions or acknowledge the actions of others. Which means they can mentally detach themselves from any crime they commit or any wrong they do. That is a really bad thing to happen to a people.

Harrychocoberry:


Nope..I don't have a blog.
I once had but it's no more in existence.
Thanks for the compliment.

Get a blog then.
You have a loyal follower already

my mum just came to my mind.
if our generator develops fault, she says 'my enemies have come'. there was a time our gen. had caburator problem. she started spraying it olive oil, praying and shouting...

Mzjhulz:
May my enemies not see me dis new year

Ur personal text has said it all

Harrychocoberry:
"MY ENEMIES ARE AT WORK

May you see your enemies in your rear-view and never with your head-lights.

May your enemies be forever in your boot, but never in your bonnet? Don’t say amen here o. Some Ferraris and Lambos have their engines in the trunk instead

Happy new year

This is a Well thought piece.

Denying the existence of enemies has the same results as attributing everything to them.

Whether we like it or not, metaphysical powers exist and the possessors use it as they deem fit.

This is not an African affair; Harry Potter is dedicated to witchcraft; some American season films also feature the supernatural (legend of the seeker,Game of Thrones, Merlin)etc.

There are enemies who are capable of doing different things; there is also the place of laziness on our part.

We should encourage people to be prayerful and play their own part. Enemy or not, if we take the first step, we are on our way to victory

@masks: your friend muSt be a JJC if he doesn't know that several spirits are invoked to those masks.