It is the belief of Nigerians that once you finish from the University, the next agenda should be marriage. What happens to looking for a job or creating one & working real hard to earn a comfortable life for oneself,the unborn kids&family as a whole.
They seem to have this awkward belief that once you marry, things will strengthen out forgetting that you were not comfortable being single talk less of being marriage.

This is a good scenario:
A guy & a lady in a relationship graduated few years ago,last year the lady got a marketing job of #20,000 without any hope of getting a better one later & the guy still jobless. The parents of the two decided they marry especially that of the lady whose parents are Secondary school teachers.
People advised the lady's parent but they turned deaf ears. They raised money from people&co-operative to make the wedding colourful&fantastic. The wedding took place last year&i tell you,it consumed a lot of money.
Early this year, the groom got a #15,000 job& the bride lost her job cause she was meeting up to her the target given her. They both live in a house rented for them by parents pending the time their jobs will jack up. The couple are not in any comfort zones. The parents are still owing people over the wedding ceremony.

What happens to the thinking faculty of these couple,why didn't they convince the parents.
Some even go to the extent of given birth birth to children without any concrete plan for their welfare.

How can this be contained?

dazzle5:

It is the belief of Nigerians that once you finish from the University, the next agenda should be marriage. What happens to looking for a job or creating one & working real hard to earn a comfortable life for oneself,the unborn kids&family as a whole.
They seem to have this awkward belief that once you marry, things will strengthen out forgetting that you were not comfortable being single talk less of being marriage.

This is a good scenario:
A guy & a lady in a relationship graduated few years ago,last year the lady got a marketing job of #20,000 without any hope of getting a better one later & the guy still jobless. The parents of the two decided they marry especially that of the lady whose parents are Secondary school teachers.
People advised the lady's parent but they turned deaf ears. They raised money from people&co-operative to make the wedding colourful&fantastic. The wedding took place last year&i tell you,it consumed a lot of money.
Early this year, the groom got a #15,000 job& the bride lost her job cause she was meeting up to her the target given her. They both live in a house rented for them by parents pending the time their jobs will jack up. The couple are not in any comfort zones. The parents are still owing people over the wedding ceremony.

What happens to the thinking faculty of these couple,why didn't they convince the parents.
Some even go to the extent of given birth birth to children without any concrete plan for their welfare.

How can this be contained?

Its hard to defy the wishes of ones parents here in this part of the world esp if you depend on them . I feel for both of them.

dazzle5:

It is the belief of Nigerians that once you finish from the University, the next agenda should be marriage. What happens to looking for a job or creating one & working real hard to earn a comfortable life for oneself,the unborn kids&family as a whole.
They seem to have this awkward belief that once you marry, things will strengthen out forgetting that you were not comfortable being single talk less of being marriage.

This is a good scenario:
A guy & a lady in a relationship graduated few years ago,last year the lady got a marketing job of #20,000 without any hope of getting a better one later & the guy still jobless. The parents of the two decided they marry especially that of the lady whose parents are Secondary school teachers.
People advised the lady's parent but they turned deaf ears. They raised money from people&co-operative to make the wedding colourful&fantastic. The wedding took place last year&i tell you,it consumed a lot of money.
Early this year, the groom got a #15,000 job& the bride lost her job cause she was meeting up to her the target given her. They both live in a house rented for them by parents pending the time their jobs will jack up. The couple are not in any comfort zones. The parents are still owing people over the wedding ceremony.

What happens to the thinking faculty of these couple,why didn't they convince the parents.
Some even go to the extent of given birth birth to children without any concrete plan for their welfare.

How can this be contained?

What a bomb shell. This was what i said in a thread some weeks ago. You dnt have a good paying job but you go ahead to marry. To top it all, you follow the nigerian mentality of giving birth to children immediately with the belief that children will open doors of opportunities for you. If you follow the opinions of certain people, poverty will not be far from you. Its a typical nigerian mentality but its the choice of people to either harbor it or discard it. Looking at the economic trends of the country, nobody will teach you to be sensible about your choices. But since people want to marry to please parents and society, they end up with regrets in the end forgeting that once you are stuck, you are stuck and nobody will be there to help you out. Accumulation of debts up and down will not allow you to enjoy your marriage. I hope they hold on child bearing till things pick up.

Not every Nigerian joor.
I don't have that mentality at all. A lot others don't.

Nonsense mentality...... I cannot get married until I'm able to take care of my family

I dey find husband

Sophyrocks:


What a bomb shell. This was what i said in a thread some weeks ago. You dnt have a good paying job but you go ahead to marry. To top it all, you follow the nigerian mentality of giving birth to children immediately with the belief that children will open doors of opportunities for you. If you follow the opinions of certain people, poverty will not be far from you. Its a typical nigerian mentality but its the choice of people to either harbor it or discard it. Looking at the economic trends of the country, nobody will teach you to be sensible about your choices. But since people want to marry to please parents and society, they end up with regrets in the end forgeting that once you are stuck, you are stuck and nobody will be there to help you out. Accumulation of debts up and down will not allow you to enjoy your marriage. I hope they hold on child bearing till things pick up.

That's lovely,that means we are on same page& its an issue that needs 100% attention

My agenda was to school first then find a good job before diving into marriage