You guys help a friend of mine,

She had this guy who made her pregnant but helped her with the birth of the kids
as far as finances in that, she never worked whilst pregnant, he fed her, he paid
for her kids to be born in a private hospital and was present just in an absent way.

Whilst she was pregnant he wanted the kids to be named after him, his grandfather and great grandfather.

I think they had a difficult relationship so things didnt go quite well. My friend ended
up giving birth alone, and her kids are 6 months, he keeps saying he will see them but
he hasnt yet.

QUESTION

Should she name and especially surname her kids after him?
How can she as a mum have one surname and her kids another, does this not affect legal things?
Is it not "weak" to carry your mother's surname especially if your a boy?
From the bible perspective are names not supposed to be of a man?
Do you think at one point in his life he would be proud of these kids carrying his name or
would you say he has rejected them?

I told her to dump his bum but when it comes to carrying your father's name its your identity,


what do you all think?

Thanx

shes been though a lot

its her choice no1 can really tell her, but maybe she should considier a hypen? like
*******-*****

ya shes been through a lot bless her,

and can you believe she even gave birth to his twins!

what man would abandon twins!

african men out there arent you concerned about passing your names on

and being looked upon as fertile having gotten a woman twins!

so if she refuses to name the kids after their dad, what does that make her? makes her a very arrogant, un grateful, yob - why? the man was there all along, this is why women are to be treated in their own game, never grateful, but always wanting what they cant give themselves.

there's more to this story . . . the guy was there all along, paid for everything and suddenly disappeared as the kids were to be born?

OBOSANJO!

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tpia:

she can give the kids their father's first name. T

As a surname?

.

tpia:

yes.

Some fathers even do that themselves (give the kids their first name), if they don't want to bear the family names for some reason.

I have a few friends like that.

ohh ok, never heard of that. I think it's best if the child bears the mother (if it's still he maiden's name) 's last name

Whatever name the childs bears its important they know where they come from.

You hear horror stories of brother and sister marrying.

Dont worry if the Dad is a deadbeat loser. The child will know the truth.

@ post,

The kids should be allowed to bear their father's name whether is there or not. For God's sake, he is their father. Except the lady is not sure of the kids father. What about if the kids start asking questions 2morrow because of one thing or the other

we all know who the kids father is. theres no denying it.

i used to think if i was in that situation - cause i think theory is different to practice,

i used to think i would give them their father's names cause biblically we blessed through
our paternal side and you have to be named according to your blood whether the man is good or
bad cause reality is, its just your blood.

from what we saw he really did try for her, but he just withdrew all of a sudden,
a commitment elsewhere is a great explanation for this,

honestly i dont know what i would name these kids in such a case,
he keeps saying he is coming and is just getting further and further from her,

this life nawaO!