Forgive me if my post is too long.

My advice to single/newly married ladies

The way so many families, esp newly married couples break up is really alarming. This has eventually led to the high number of single parent in our society, most of them struggling to feed the kids and being entirely ignored by their husband. Not just only on the side of break-up, but also, death and some unforseen circumstances might lead to this problem. So many atimes, families break up or the death of one of the partner might happen (esp the man) and the other partner(wife in this case) is then left at the mercy of her inlaws who might make life miserable for her. There is one thing that I believe in this life... Trust no one... Even your own self. Most time, the inlaws might be pretty good to you when your hubby is still alive. but the moment he dies, their true color is then revealed and by then, you will be regretting that you dont have somethings in place before death of your hubby. In this modern age, I see no reason why the man of the house shldnt draft out a will (immediately after their wedding) or set up something tangible for the wife only so as to protect the welfare of his family when he dies (no one is praying for death, but one thing is certain, death is inevitable). Also, I see no reason why a woman will comfortably sit down at home doing nothing all in the name that her husband dont want her to work, thats sheer foolishness. If something shld happen and the husband can no longer fed for the family, what then becomes the fate of the family. There is nothing wrong for a women to demand from her husband to draft out a will and use her and the kids name as the next of kin in his business/accounts and properties. So many women have fallen victims in this scenario where the in laws come in to claim what ever the husband left behind. Women also need to wisen up. even if your hubby dont want you to work, dont just sit at home and enjoy his wealth. Ensure that you are fully involved in his business, ensure that you know about all his landed properties, their location and other investment and if possible, make sure that you not only have a signatory to all those properties, but let your name appear as his
next of kin, "for what ever belong to him also belong to you"... But its unfortunate that your in-laws may not agree with that statement in quote when he dies. If your hubby truly loves you, he wont find it difficult in doing that cos its for the good of his family. Dont think that you are wishing him death by proposing for such, its a basic thing that needed to be done for the well being of the family. There is a case that I knw of, the hubby died from an accident. Surprising enough, the woman knws that her hubby has alot of landed properties in about 5 states, but she have no idea where the documents are or the location of the properties. Now that the hubby is gone, who then takes charge of it. though her in-laws didnt really disturb her over the properties, but am pretty sure it will be difficult to claim the land since she dont even know the location of the land or even where the documents are. This type of scenario and other similar ones abound and the end point is that the woman is being left with nothing most esp when she have nothing serious doing.

Dont always feel that since your in-laws are good, they will protect you when things like this happens, well sorry you might be disappointed and there is hardly anyway out of this scenario except you have the connections to people/groups that will help you fight for your right...
No one is praying for the untimely or immediate death of your partner, but the way the world is now, esp when your inlaws arent that reach and exposed, its best to prepare for the worst case scenario in other not to be caugth off guard.

I think its high time churches start encouraging court marriage or better still let the church ensure that the man writes his will within 6months after the wedding and then the will can be updated every year to keep it in line with the family growth.

The reason for writing this is cos within the last 2 years, I have seen about 3-5 widows that are in logger heads with her inlaws over the properties that her hubby left behind. though some of them won the case, but its better to present it that face the figt and win cos you never can tell what else your inlaws will do to you as they will definately not accept defeat and shame.