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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently (6994 Views)
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Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by oluite(f): 11:41am On Mar 24, 2009 |
BE THANKFUL U AV A WONDERFUL WIFE.JUST IGNORE THE IN-LAWS.MEANWHILE SEARCH AND PRAY FOR A NEW JOB. FEEL FREE . |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by JJYOU: 11:46am On Mar 24, 2009 |
**osisi:Amen jabbok:you dont even go to your inlaws for some. they come to you to collect thier dowry. end times indeed. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by martho(m): 12:15pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
African mentality(THIS IS SICKNESS).It doesn't matter who is in charge financially as long as there's respect and peace at home. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by AjanleKoko: 12:50pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
martho:200% agree. What a life! |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Nobody: 12:55pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
martho:It does matter who is in charge financially. And our mentality makes us who we are(Africans), u can think like the Mongolians or the chinese if u want, but let us say it as it is- u can never really have "peace" when the woman becomes the man. We r in Africa, take it or leave it bro. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by ozomagala: 12:57pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
We are Africans! Cultural imperialism is doing us no good! I have heard one man boasting that if he wants, he would just allow his wife buy him a brand new car! ![]() Every woman no matter how financially bouyant she is, would always want her real husband to be more powerful. Do a sincere research. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by djlimse: 12:59pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
![]() , "owing to your financial and emotional situation?" my advice 4 this felaz is 2 try and be himself irrespective of what the out come happens 2 be, i do belive he should always try and take the role of the leather @ home, even when every one knows such thing could be hard to achieve as a result of wht de situtaion is at hand, beside that, he should always demand 4 respect from his wife by asking her to tell him wht had happened @ her working place, this would help him in knowing if the girl really loved him or not and if the girl is cheaing on himor nt. thnx u all, dj limse ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by emmaco24(m): 1:03pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
luckymome: Sensible talk dude It all depends on the type of woman you have as a wife.If it's the type that believes that he who blows the pipe dictates the tune,then u're in for real trouble.But, if she's the type that recognises that no matter what you have authority over her as the man,then that will be better.Well, it seems you have an understanding and hardworking wife. So, don't ever think of treating her with scorn or betraying her when the money starts flowing again because that's what most men do (no offense but I have to call a spade by it's name). |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Nobody: 1:03pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
ozomagala:I Roger n Echo that bro! |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by amaikama(m): 1:21pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
@Poster!! so? i will feel very much relaxed knowing fully well it will not be like that till Jesus Christ comes. Why would i be worrying my head and ruine my home and marriage just because my wife she is the one paying for the house rent ![]() ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by sayso: 1:28pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
@FBS. FBS: WORRY INVITED FOR- EVER[color=#990000][/color] |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by JJYOU: 1:34pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
ozomagala:thank you my brother. most people write here like they forget we are talking about nigeria here. i wish i can post a link of that mama G and her daughter and in law film here. couldnt have explained it better. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Adexy001(f): 1:40pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
@ Topic: It is good that you have a very hardworking woman as a wife but i would advise that you do not get comfortable with her doing so much and give her back her money or a part of it as soon as you can get something. Even if you do not make as much as she does, be seen to be going out of your way to contribute. That is the only way you can appreciate her. It is no use sitting down and thinking about what to do, MOVE. There are various jobs outside. Even the bible says a man that cannot care for his own is worst than an infidel. Get something doing. If you had no one to help you or to turn to, you would still provide |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by ernal(m): 1:46pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
I guess most of us where raised in the Jet age,internet age i presume I will gladly sit back and be the planner for those funds.Its harvest time my bros.How about those sleepless working hours trying to make up for your girlfriend birthday gifts,those lunches,those dinner.Abeg economy meltdown don reach everywhere,if your woman makes more,be glad to plan your trip to Fiji with the kids dont forget to send me an economy ticket. Power to the Women! |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by larman4u(m): 2:08pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
When it comes to these men of God,one should be very careful in passing unpalatable comments.The bible says touch not my anoited and do my prophet no harm. Come to look at it economically,the season we are in,many businesses are going down and as a result of this you can not hold any one responsible for a mere advice. [color=#550000][/color]If trully the pastor is not involved in any shaddy deal I want to believe that he as a pastor and his ministry will wax stronger eventually. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by larman4u(m): 2:24pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
Well its a priviledge to have a wife who is ready to assist you in times of need. Don't relax yet because if you fail to get a job quick the femine nature of your wife will come out and she will start to misbehave. Pray harder so that God can land you a good job to show appreciation and have your house under your control. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by rolawealth(m): 2:28pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
There is nothing bad in that but, you know the way women behave sometimes she may capitalise on that to behave funny. ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by jendordino(m): 2:56pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
true talk |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Iranoladun(f): 2:58pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
@Poster It all depend on you. As you lay your bed so you'll lie on it. If you make it an issue and start reading meanings into all her actions/inactions because she's paying the bills then there will be big wahala between you and in your home. But you need to constantly reassure her of your love & your appreciation of her financial help. We are Africans and even in other climate marriage is not the equivalent of 100% contribution by husband vs zero contribution from the wife or vice versa otherwise it becomes a parasitic relationship rather than symbiotic. Both partners should contribute some percentage but as an African man you will want to contribute more than the wife. Enjoy it why it last but get a job fast or work your ass off trying to get one. Women don't like a layabout man no matter how much you are helping her with house keeping. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Hauwa1: 3:05pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
igaro, instead of bugging yourself, just make sure madam got the best food to eat whenever she comes back from work. give that poundo extra touch and egusi lots of orishirishi. by the time you are done researching abt your job and sending out your cv, cooking and cleaning the house, you'd be so tired to think of anything negative but sleep ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by smurf1(f): 3:23pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
so what?, ![]() ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Murp999: 3:30pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
@ Topic: It is good that you have a very hardworking woman as a wife but i would advise that you do not get comfortable with her doing so much and give her back her money or a part of it as soon as you can get something. Even if you do not make as much as she does, be seen to be going out of your way to contribute. That is the only way you can appreciate her. It is no use sitting down and thinking about what to do, MOVE. There are various jobs outside. Even the bible says a man that cannot care for his own is worst than an infidel. Get something doing. If you had no one to help you or to turn to, you would still provide DId I hear u right? "Give her back her money" ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by spikedcylinder: 3:37pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
I just realised. . . . its easier said than done. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by bsala00: 3:55pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
Igaro, I can relate with your predicament. living and working in the UK as senior IT consultant, my daily rate is £550 per day. But since this recession I have not had a job for over 5 months now. I had some savings but they evaporated in 2 months. Although we have some investments - the return of these I use to pay for bills (and you know there are a lot of thoes in the UK), my wife has been paying the mortgage for the past 4 months now. She has been so good she also paid for me to attend an expensive course. My wife is a rare gem and will make sure that I have all I need even though I have tried to limit what she gives me to the mortgage. I make sure that I do all the house work and asked her to call in the Domestic Cleaner every two weeks and I will fill in for the other twoo weeks each month. I look after the children and all other house hold chores. Sometimes (not all the time) When she returns from work, I make her Dinner and we sit together and eat. She will go out of her way to fill the car tank, pay for the shopping and do all sorts of little and big things for me, including lots of presents/gifts. She has also protected me from everyone (and I mean everyone) so that people do not know that I am unemployed. What more can I ask for? She has even supported me inmensly in my startup business which is yet to take off. I love her to bits and sincerely cherish her. Moreso I greatly appreciate what she is doing and what she has done and I do not cease to tell her - I say it at every opportunity. I pray to GOD for her everyday and I am always dreaming of how I am going to repay her both financially and emotionally. I am hoping to buy her a new merc once I am back on my feet. But just like you Igaro, there are dark days and I mean very dark days - (think about it from £550 per day to zero). I do not wish this on my worst enemy, but I am taking it like a man and forging ahead knowing that these days. But my wife expects me to be happy all the time and anytime I look sober she gets upset and starts saying she cannot be walking around on eggshells. I try to explain to her to understand what I am going through. Then she would start saying things like she is trying her best, that most women will not do the same for me and that she is sure that after all these is over, I will not appreciate it. This really makes me very sad so next time she wants to give me something, I am very scared to take it, to which she would accuse me of not trusting her. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Sarin(f): 4:02pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
I will never pray for such for my hubby but if it happens, it's temporary and not permanet. So, I dont think he will feel restricted or uncomfortable, we are suppose to be partners in all. ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Nobody: 4:02pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
When you got married i guess u endowed each other with your wordly goods so i dont think any man should feel different living in a house his wife paid for because he is not financially boyant. It shows u dont have perfect love and if ur wife is a wise and good woman she will know this is the time that she will earn the affection and respect of her husband by her actions seasons change in every mans life who knows guy u could be on your way to millions and would u not be happy looking by your side to see a woman who was with u thru thick and thin |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Rekky(f): 4:37pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
hhhhhuuuuuhhhhh, It is well. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Iranoladun(f): 4:51pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
@bsala00 Your current experience will surely help the poster and as I said in my two previous posts on this thread he should learn to appreciate his wife's effort while trying to get a job. Letting a 3rd party know the financial situation as someone suggest is a disaster because in future the in-laws/outsider may use the information against you or your wife. @poster and @bsala00 You should not be thinking of repaying your wife financiallly but repayment in kind by your committment, love, kindness and integrity during this period and when you are finally back on your feet financially. This is the true repayment that she will appreciate. |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by presido1: 5:54pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
*Hauwa*:Hauwa Hauwa Hauwa how many times did i call u? |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by Hauwa1: 5:57pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
![]() ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by ozomagala: 6:06pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
Hauwa!! ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: Wife Has Financial Upperhand Presently by denony(m): 6:30pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
My brother he who finds a wife finds a good thing says the Lord. But we men shall pray women never provide for us. cos' there own matter dey get belle, when e go born, na twins with big big head. am not adding salt to your inury, be courageous some women are a bit difference, maybe ur wife is one of them, be prayerful that u pick up soon to show her you appreciate her. Get over it, things will be alright. Its not an omen. TWO PERSON IN ONE ![]() |
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