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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films (3784 Views)
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10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 4:43pm On May 21, 2015 |
1: Nobody locks the damn door. [Scenario]: A killer opens the gate, opens the front door, walks through the sitting room, up the stairs, and opens the bedroom door and strikes unchecked and unnoticed all the way through…Geez! 2. Sex makes you lose your sense of hearing. [Scenario]: Hubby comes home for lunch (as a surprise), opens the gate, drives in, locks the gate, opens the front door, goes upstairs (same as scenario 1), opens the bedroom door and catches the wife in bed with a lover. I guess we secrete “muff” hormones during sex…#Bio 101 3. Who says you cannot give birth to someone 5 years younger than you? [Scenario]: Desmond Elliot: Thanks mom. Eucharia Anulobi: you’re welcome dear. No makeup to depict the supposed difference in age or is her anti-aging cream that good? 4. 2 legs in trousers and black shoes isn’t a good sign. [Scenario]: Legs walking (cue in sound specialist with “Dramatic” sound effects) #ge geun-girigigi gigi.gaga-gugugbagba..ge geun#…Be warned!!! 5: The Police do not exaggerate. [Scenario]: Police man: *Flashes worn out ID* I am Inspector Mark, this is Sergeant James. You’re under arrest for the murder of “one” (yes one not two) Miss Sandra Johnson [name is fictional ooo}. Honest folks. Police is indeed your friend. 6: Even a modern gun has to be cocked several times before you shoot. [Scenario]: Bad guy: *cocks gun* I will shoot you if you do not stay down (1 min later) Bad guy: *Re-cocks gun* Where is the money? (Police siren) Bad guy: *Re-re-cocks gun* waste all of them. 7: All that you need to watch a movie is: The name, the poster and the cast. Shikena. Grab a bowl of tanfiri and enjoy. 8: If a film has 4 parts, all you need is the last 15 minutes of Part 4 to understand and enjoy the movie. 9: Men are soooo gullible. They swallow everything hook, line & sinker [Scenario]: Man: I kept calling Julie but her phone is switched off since last night so I decided to check her at home. Girlfriend’s best friend: Oh Julie? She’s not who you think she is. She went out with her other boyfriend. Man: I can’t believe she’d do this to me. Girlfriend’s best friend: I am so sorry. She doesn’t appreciate you…#blah blah# He ends up impregnating her best friend before discovering she made it all up. Why am I a man sef? Shame dey catch me. And for the last fac (for now)… 10: The world is the smallest place you can ever think of. [Scenario]: A man finally decides to marry but his proposed bride is his long lost sister whom his parents have been hiding. [Scenario]: The man and his family whom you maltreated will be the ones in position to help you in future. [Scenario]: Anyone who aborts a child always has difficulty having children later in life have a wonderful evening 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by agarawu23(m): 4:45pm On May 21, 2015 |
how is this crap romantic ? 2 Likes
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Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by cally3D(m): 4:51pm On May 21, 2015 |
Bike abeg carry mi go malawi, no b here I dey find! 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by justmag(m): 4:58pm On May 21, 2015 |
Waste of my last 1% percent battery life.... 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by INTERMAN: 5:29pm On May 21, 2015 |
Yeah, the funniest thing is that when someone shot dead, no blood comes out. 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 5:41pm On May 21, 2015 |
agarawu23:sorry if its in d wrong section a beg help tell mods to move am 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Nobody: 5:41pm On May 21, 2015 |
Very funny 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 5:42pm On May 21, 2015 |
cally3D:bros wet u see fuel?no be or mates d trek so u no go go start or or own trekking journey to or destination 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 5:43pm On May 21, 2015 |
pinkbee:I thought u gals liked naija movies 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Jayjay0(m): 5:44pm On May 21, 2015 |
on point 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Nobody: 5:49pm On May 21, 2015 |
groundnutoil:Not my kind. I'd rather watch bollywood |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Nobody: 6:25pm On May 21, 2015 |
INTERMAN:u get sharp eye. Na tomato kishup be their blood. Lolz |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by pinkiberry(m): 6:35pm On May 21, 2015 |
u gat me laughing here |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 7:21pm On May 21, 2015 |
pinkbee:both bolly and Molly no d ma dictionary only holly me d follow |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by sherrypelbrone(f): 7:22pm On May 21, 2015 |
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Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 7:22pm On May 21, 2015 |
Jollyjoy:hehehehe before u wan make DM ur blood abi |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 7:24pm On May 21, 2015 |
sherrypelbrone:sister wetin be ur own na u no go go pay seen ad fee make I'm put am for FP for u ? |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by sherrypelbrone(f): 7:30pm On May 21, 2015 |
groundnutoil:do it for a cool ransome |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Krasid(m): 7:46pm On May 21, 2015 |
Well, i have seen a few nollywood movies recently and i can say that there has been a slight improvement. |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by publicenemy(m): 8:32pm On May 21, 2015 |
So cool |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Nobody: 8:55pm On May 21, 2015 |
groundnutoil:na film na. That is Also part of the entertainment. |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Nobody: 9:41pm On May 21, 2015 |
1 Like 1 Share |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Nobody: 9:44pm On May 21, 2015 |
rokiatu: Ha hou hout of hhhyour senses lol see ur ppl |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by AfricanApple(f): 10:15pm On May 21, 2015 |
motor go get accident, you no go see the scratches car nor the remains |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by Nature129(m): 10:39pm On May 21, 2015 |
This post is just crap! Despite all these flaws Nollywood films hit US Box Office and displace many Hollywood films. Nollywood is getting better as there will always be room for improvement. Nigeria commands entertainment in Africa with films and music. Nigerians are a very creative people. Obviously, you can't compare Nollywood films with that trash our ladies fall in love with on Telemundo...OP, abeg go sleep! |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 5:45am On May 22, 2015 |
Nature129:bros u be nolly director?y u carry dia mata 4 head relax bros its just 4 laff.u dn see naija action film b4 like wetin an 8yr boi d produce mtchwww 1 Like |
Re: 10 Hilarious Facts About Nollywood Films by groundnutoil(m): 5:47am On May 22, 2015 |
rokiatu:lwkmd thanks 4 d contribution btw u get d body of an actress wetin stil d hol u |
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