This happened recently in a town nearby Oba-Ile in Osun State, where a man who always make His woman to undertake every snake (problem) got to the height of it.
The story line goes thus:

That particular young woman complains a lot that She used to be a solution to every predicament that falls upon the family;

The husband made her the bread winner of the family owing to the fact that she's more industrious, hardworking and skillful.

This virtuous woman never relents in paying off
The children bills including food, clothing and social costs.
On that fateful day, the man asked if the woman could raise Him a huge sum of money to process traveling abroad.

If you are the woman, What will you do?
Justify this story: Is it natural to recognize some men as weaker vessels in relation to their wives??

Curious mind from a problem solving perspective.

hmmm

raumdeuter:
hmmm

SecONDed.

ahnie:
SecONDed.

Thirded!

My sister,na only Angel fit survive this responsibility

coogaluta:



Thirded!

Fourthed again o

The fact that she is the breadwinner, does not mean the husband is totally useless or that he doesn't do anything to help his family.

Why is he travelling?? Is he travelling for leisure?? And if he is, is the wife complaining because she can't afford it??

If you are the woman, What will you do?

I can't answer this question because I don't even know what the problem is. What is the issue?? Why is a woman that has been the breadwinner for years complaining because her husband wants to travel abroad? Is he going there for education?? Is he going there permanently?

Does she have trust issues?? Is the man refusing to understand that she can't afford such expense? Is she trying to get him to work? Is she feeling used? What is the problem?

Fifthed,its this type of husbands that likes wearin short knickers. na them go dey rub shirley for face everymorning dey press pimples from their faces.

When women become breadwinners

Op if you konw the woman tell her that if she does she will be spending her sweat to send the lazy opportunist of a man to hook up with another lady abroad.

focus7:
Op if you konw the woman tell her that if she does she will be spending her sweat to send the lazy opportunist of a man to hook up with another lady abroad.

the Op husband na real faworaja.speaking about monkey dey work baboon dey chop


What do you expect when you are used to others slaving for you . Of course it becomes a right

ahnie:
Fifthed,its this type of husbands that likes wearin short knickers. na them go dey rub shirley for face everymorning dey press pimples from their faces.

and be asking you if he's handsome

Is the issue her being the breadwinner or the fact that she does not know what he wants to go and do abroad?

Is the 'abroad' just vague or is he going for education, skill acquisition, hustle? Cos I don't really see why the issue of her being the breadwinner is just surfacing because he wants to go abroad?

Ok assuming his excuses are genuine, what is so special about going abroad that cannot be done in Nigeria. If he shines his eyes well he'll find opportunities abi its until you travel out that you'll make it. There are plenty people that bagged blbs boshey lo loshey bo.nothing to show for it whereas if he invests the money he wants to use in travelling out into any business of his choice he'll make it. Shioor



of which if he doesn't know anybody there and just assumes miraculously he'll come home a billionaire afaimo ko ma shey gateman ku and one white racist will shoot him for being black and then his corpse will be dumped back in Nigeria

damiso:
Is the issue her being the breadwinner or the fact that she does not know what he wants to go and do abroad?

Is the 'abroad' just vague or is he going for education, skill acquisition, hustle? Cos I don't really see why the issue of her being the breadwinner is just surfacing because he wants to go abroad?

SAMBARRY:
Ok assuming his excuses are genuine, what is so special about going abroad that cannot be done in Nigeria. If he shines his eyes well he'll find opportunities abi its until you travel out that you'll make it. There are plenty people that bagged blbs boshey lo loshey bo.nothing to show for it whereas if he invests the money he wants to use in travelling out into any business of his choice he'll make it. Shioor



of which if he doesn't know anybody there and just assumes miraculously he'll come home a billionaire afaimo ko ma shey gateman ku and one white racist will shoot him for being black and then his corpse will be dumped back in Nigeria

My question was more about the complaints and which is which
that she is the breadwinner or is she complaining that he does not want to travel abroad?

Those two complaints are two diff things entirely.

I am the no 1 anti ' I want to travel with no plans' advocate.

My guess is she is complaining more about being the breadwinner. I doubt both complaints would have been jumbled up if the guy could have stumped the money for his ' I want to travel' plans by himself.

damiso:


My question was more about the complaints and which is which
that she is the breadwinner or is she complaining that he does not want to travel abroad?

Those two complaints are two diff things entirely

I think it's a problem of LAZINESS and looking for QUICK EASY CASH....I don't even trust his excuse. He wan go use the money flenjure abroad

SAMBARRY:
I think it's a problem of LAZINESS and looking for QUICK EASY CASH

Might be might not be. I also agree that 'travel abroad' is definitely not the way to go with no concrete plans. As for the easy cash bit, thousands have been shocked by a rude wakening when they land.

The original post is a bit sketchy but sometimes one spouse ( most times this complaints surface when its the woman breadwinner ) paying all the bills does not mean the other is lazy in the general sense of it.

Oyinbo says the grass is always greener on the other side.



Some house boys, gate men, Gardner and restaurant cleaner will go and sidan inside one fancy restaurant or hotel con write eating the life of my head and put it on Facebook when he's doing 4 or 5 jobs to make a living. Tax don quench them. As they are collecting their salary, government is taking a larger percentage of their salary through orisirisi tax


here in Nigeria you can be a successful business man and evade tax conveniently and nobody will even notice or care about how much you earn but there they'll fling you into prison without batting an eyelid. These countries I'm talking about hate nigerians and assume they are opportunists and scoundrels.



So instead of subjecting yourself to voluntary slavery with the hope of seeing easy and free dollars on the streets that he can just pick up ..why doesn't he change his orientation and at least make an attempt to leave the labour market

damiso:


Might be might not be. I also agree that 'travel abroad' is definitely not the way to go with no concrete plans. If na wasy cash, thousands have been shocked by a rude wakening when they land.

The original post is a bit sketchy but sometimes one spouse ( most times this complaints surface when its the woman breadwinner ) paying all the bills does not mean the other is lazy in the general sense of it.

@damiso In Nigeria just doing one job, 9-5pm is enough for you to live a good life if you don't pass your boundaries . All the indiscipline that you can get away with as a nigerian staff especially in public sector e.g coming late to work, selling recharge card in the office, using office laptop and Internet to chat and Facebook during office hours, painting your nails during work, you can't dare it there

SAMBARRY:
Oyinbo says the grass is always greener on the other side.



Some house boys, gate men, Gardner and restaurant cleaner will go and sidan inside one fancy restaurant or hotel con write eating the life of my head and put it on Facebook when he's doing 4 or 5 jobs to make a living. Tax don quench them. As they are collecting their salary, government is taking a larger percentage of their salary through orisirisi tax


here in Nigeria you can be a successful business man and evade tax conveniently and nobody will even notice or care about how much you earn but there they'll fling you into prison without batting an eyelid. These countries I'm talking about hate nigerians and assume they are opportunists and scoundrels.



So instead of subjecting yourself to voluntary slavery with the hope of seeing easy and free dollars on the streets that he can just pick up ..why doesn't he change his orientation and at least make an attempt to leave the labour market

But Sambaryy we don't know if this guy wants to go for masters naa?

damiso:


But Sambaryy we don't know if this guy wants to go for masters naa?

ok so they don't do masters in Nigeria




continue making excuses for him

SAMBARRY:
@damiso In Nigeria just doing one job, 9-5pm is enough for you to live a good life if you don't pass your boundaries . All the indiscipline that you can get away with as a nigerian staff e.g coming late to work, selling recharge card in the office, using office laptop and Internet to chat and Facebook during office hours you can't dare it there

aunty sambarry you def have loads of passion.

Are you now saying indiscipline should be encouraged? _{shhh I am actually replying from my office desktop and I am not in Nigeria} I say let me log on to ease off stress but walahi NL is reducing my productivity.

A good professional 9 to 5 job is also okay to live a good life anywhere in the west don't believe all the stereotypes not everyone is a janitor or gateman abroad.

Lets leave the reasons not to travel abroad illegally for another day and find out the real complaint of the woman in the original post.

SAMBARRY:
ok so they don't do masters in Nigeria




continue making excuses for him

I am not making excuses for him o I am just saying I don't know what advise to give as I don't know what the actual complaint is.

Like I said I can bet that 80% of the complaint is cos madam is the breadwinner. Don't get me wrong I am not saying that its not a valid complaint especially if the other party is not pulling their own weight.

But the original post is too vague for us to conclude that the guy is a lazy loafer who allows his wife to pay all the bills and now wants to go abroad to become a gateman

I'm a patriotic and true nigerian



I love my country and my country loves me



ok o.continue making excuses for him and be tifin Oyinbo megabytes. You will soon pay for the one you didn't use sef

damiso:


aunty sambarry you def have loads of passion.

Are you now saying indiscipline should be encouraged? _{shhh I am actually replying from my office desktop and I am not in Nigeria} I say let me log on to ease off stress but walahi NL is reducing my productivity.

A good professional 9 to 5 job is also okay to live a good life anywhere in the west don't believe all the stereotypes not everyone is a janitor or gateman abroad.

Lets leave the reasons not to travel abroad illegally for another day and find out the real complaint of the woman in the original post.

SAMBARRY:
I'm a patriotic and true nigerian



I love my country and my country loves me



ok o.continue making excuses for him and be tifin Oyinbo megabytes. You will soon pay for the one you didn't use sef

I am trying to maintain a work/life balance

My point is that he should make attempt and let the wife see that at least he's making attempt. Not the one that he will wake up in the morning and be watching super sport in the afternoon go and drink beer in the beer parlour and be arguing about arsenal and man United like an un serious fool then in the evening come back and be asking for amala ewedu pomo bokoto and fresh fish yet he's not willing to try

damiso:


I am not making excuses for him o I am just saying I don't know what advise to give as I don't know what the actual complaint is.

Like I said I can bet that 80% of the complaint is cos madam is the breadwinner. Don't get me wrong I am not saying that its not a valid complaint especially if the other party is not pulling their own weight.

But the original post is too vague for us to conclude that the guy is a lazy loafer who allows his wife to pay all the bills and now wants to go abroad to come a gateman

damiso:


I am trying to maintain a work/life balance

is nairaland part of ya work description

SAMBARRY:
My point is that he should make attempt and let the wife see that at least he's making attempt. Not the one that he will wake up in the morning and be watching super sport in the afternoon go and drink beer in the beer parlour and be arguing about arsenal and man United like an un serious fool then in the evening come back and be asking for amala ewedu pomo bokoto and fresh fish yet he's not willing to try

Sambarry you got all this from the original post

SAMBARRY:
is nairaland part of ya work description

yes na.. I use NL to research and analyse equality issues

I have already identified the problem or reason for complaints which is LAZINESS.he doesn't want to make attempt to leave his comfort zone yet he wants to be flenjuring



Travelling abroad is not the solution to his problem. Infact if I was him I will ask her to lend me the money to start up a business and as soon as profit comes I'll return it back




note that I deliberately said borrow so that tomorrow when the business is flourishing she won't say things like


I made you
without me the business will not have succeeded.


That's what a man who has vision ought to be doi

damiso:

I am not making excuses for him o I am just saying I don't know what advise to give as I don't know what the actual complaint is.

Like I said I can bet that 80% of the complaint is cos madam is the breadwinner. Don't get me wrong I am not saying that its not a valid complaint especially if the other party is not pulling their own weight.

But the original post is too vague for us to conclude that the guy is a lazy loafer who allows his wife to pay all the bills and now wants to go abroad to come a gateman

damiso:


yes na.. I use NL to research and analyse equality issues

Haaaaaa the oga at the top must hear of this

damiso:


Sambarry you got all this from the original post

op didn't type it but I have imagination and mind for me to know the itinerary of a lazy man

lilmax:
When women become breadwinners

True talk brother. Why are y'all attacking the husband as if niqqa's committing an abomination?