I am 26 and have been dating a 23-year-old lady for about three years. She wants to remain a virgin till she gets married, so we have never had sex. Although we live in the same area, I am not granted the freedom to visit her.

She was coming to my place whenever my parents were not at home. The fact is that my parents must not come home and see me with a girl. Now, she has refused coming and has asked that I sort out things with my parents.

She insinuated that my parents want to set me up with one of their rich friends’ daughters. I thought if I had sex with her, things would not have been like this. At least, there would have been a little attachment. Could she be using this as an excuse? I don’t want to lose her. What should I do?

J.I, Lagos.

I am sure you got involved in some activities that warranted strict survelliance from your parents. Or what else could explain a 26-year-old being kept under watch? Cultism? Drug abuse? Expulsion from school? At that age, you should have graduated, started work and be free to have female visitors. Well, she has spoken the truth. Sort things out with your folks, turn a new leaf from whatever your sins are and act your age. If this continues, you will definitely lose her to a more mature guy. The problem on ground is not sex, it is rediscovering yourself and where you ought to be.


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