Medley:
Reason why Test of sexual capability and compatibilty before marriage is a recipe for marital crisis.

The avalanche of proponents that have consistently corroborated the 21st century believe that: women should test their husband-to-be to ensure he is good in bed, is just another one of the many excuses people raise up to encourage traditions and fashions that will further proliferate immorality and further take sodomize this world,the supporting arguments are all lies from the pit of hell.

Here are the reasons below:

1. If you are satisfied with him sexually, is he satisfied?

In a lady's quest to ensure that he marries a sexually active man, are you sure you will/have satisfied him, then the man has equal right to put an end to that relationship no matter how far it has gone - leading to lost of time(months and years) and potential suitors that gave up on you when you were in that relationship.

2. The tester may end up being decieved by an hit and run

some people can easily fake a non-existent readiness to marry you and in the end, when the crown of victory has been won for making love with you in your quest to find out for sexual compatibiliy, that partner looks for silly excuses to say it's over.

3. At what point will the test be certified tested OK.

I will never encourage anyone to make love on a first date, or even engage in premarital sex, so if this holds, and perhaps after some dates and a lady/guy that believe in testing for sexual compatibility engages in the testing excercise,when will you finish collecting samples to complete your research,how many times, and how long. Won't be surprised if this same person engages in mocking people that are prostitute - what then are you? Lets say after some years of testing,you found the partner not OK,what tells you the next will be?

4. You the tester,may become the tested.

The partner may even be dumped the next day after she had a certified OK test with her partner, only for her to find out that she didn't reciprocate same. this happening more than once in a lady's life ,will surely lead to a shattered heart torn in pieces.

5. The partner you certified OK, may even fail the next day.

The most amusing fact is that africans before the 21st centuryHardly engage in courtship and yet they grow old together and die loving each other forever. We have courtship and we are still unsatisfied. Your partner that has been superb in bed, may become weak when you are married,what happens? Would you cheat to augment? Sue for divorce? See beyond sex as the only pillar of marriage,so far the man/woman can procreate? The world want to make us believe we can figure every thing out all by ourselves,but truly,marriage is a leap of faith. The test you carried out may even make you a young baby mama after 9 months or worst still you tried aborting and ended up with a spoilt womb,will you still insisit on testing afterwards,because i doubt if majority do this test with condoms.

6. The partner may be using some sexual enhancers.

We can't deny the existence of sexual enhancers,what will you do when he stops after marriage. If this is the basis for being married to men can go the extra mile to deicieve those that have this topmost in their criteria for an healthy marriage or relationship.
What would you do afterwards? Be the next sugar-mummy in town when he travels out? I won't advice so.

7. Would there be further test to confirm if both partner can procreate?

He is good in bed, she is very experienced,bla bla bla, etc. Is he/she also good in making children? Would you get pregnant before going into marriage? This may be the next line of excuse for immorality,may be not now,may be in ten years time.
If marriage is all about sex,then the purpose is invalid.
Casual sex is as rampant as the days go,Marriage should be also about companionship, friendship, and a union where two people support each others to reach their most cherished heart desires. No matter how it is painted pre-marital sex as a way of ensuring he/she will be good in bed is decietful and mostly counter productive.

Stop overflogging this issue, the idea of sexual capability test is to safeguard the intending couples by ensuring that they are both free from sexual diseases and any inherited congenital defects in their reproductive systems.
It also ensures that they understand themselves in the area of compatibility, whether you like it or not sexual satisfaction has a direct bearing on the marriage and can determine how long the couples last in the marriage (emphasis is the marriage not the 1 day ritual called wedding)
If you dont see your intendeds unclothedness how are you sure that he or she is who they claim to be, remember what happened to Jacob in the bible, he waited 10yrs for Rachel but was given Leah, this was possible because he didnt perform test of sexual capability he could have quickly detected leah.

Lets apply wisdom, we live in the last days theres so much deception even in the church. Dont be fooled the proponents of sex after marriage dont tell you the real truth that they had seen the unclothedness of their mates before taking them to the altar, a truth any minister who officiates weddings knows too well but prefers to live in denial because of money.

Only the Endtime FC will disagree

Hoping and look for a counter thread!

SuperSuave:
op you said 7 na, you wan chop the remaining ni

Must you tell everybody you have bad eyesight?

Premarital sex is a sin and God hates it.but I cant practise a sexless relationship with someone who is not a virgin,I mean a lady whose vagina is wider than normal I will never be comfortable in such relationship,intact I will feel cheated

dbabba:


Just change your password, it will automatically log everyone out. Happened to me when someone was posting immoral stuffs through my account

The problem is that I can't log in.

searay:

The problem is that I can't log in.

Just use the forgot password option, then it will bring some secret questions you answered when opening the account. That will help you to reset the password

kaeforum:



Stop overflogging this issue, the idea of sexual capability test is to safeguard the intending couples by ensuring that they are both free from sexual diseases and any inherited congenital defects in their reproductive systems.
It also ensures that they understand themselves in the area of compatibility, whether you like it or not sexual satisfaction has a direct bearing on the marriage and can determine how long the couples last in the marriage (emphasis is the marriage not the 1 day ritual called wedding)
If you dont see your intendeds unclothedness how are you sure that he or she is who they claim to be, remember what happened to Jacob in the bible, he waited 10yrs for Rachel but was given Leah, this was possible because he didnt perform test of sexual capability he could have quickly detected leah.

Lets apply wisdom, we live in the last days theres so much deception even in the church. Dont be fooled the proponents of sex after marriage dont tell you the real truth that they had seen the unclothedness of their mates before taking them to the altar, a truth any minister who officiates weddings knows too well but prefers to live in denial because of money.

hope you know that there are two sides to a coin. You just succeeded in viewing one side of it.

Amidst the proliferation of pre-marital sex done in order to avoid non compatibility of sexuality between partners, why then is the increase in divorce rate?

radiokilla:
british english. I know one when i see one. Classically conditioned

you sure do. Bien cordialments

Sunnypa11:
Only the Endtime FC will disagree

Endtime FC club! Very strong will and die hard and always recruiting

Brugo:
Sex is overrated. It doesn't keep a husband or wife faithful. The pleasure from it doesn't even last the whole day. The satisfaction only leads to more hunger. Couples that have amazing sex also get divorced.

However, I have never known a person who'd be glad to walk away from a good companion. For marriage, I believe it's better to find a companion whom you can love and forgive naturally.

You can teach a person sex styles faster and easier than you can teach him/her companionship and sacrifice.

Well spoken bro, wish testers would listen. No guaranty even after a million testing!
And to think that many guys use the so called testing as a passport to promiscuity, sampling different girls all in the name of finding the right spec.
Marriage on nairaland is all about s.ex, men seeking compatibility in forbidden things.
Funny though, many girls support the 'test campaign'


For all ye testers.....know this, there is even no assurance of your tested 'machine' working properly after it has been acquired. So, give up already and rely on God for the best.

Bollinger:


He is utterly wrong. Married life is not the time to test out theories. Both partners must know each other thoroughly before making it permanent. The OP is obviously single or he would have known better.

How thoroughly can u know??

Since you re married, tell me: how much did u know about ur spouse before u got married? Is it anywhere near what u know now??


I believe people who try to test for sexual compatibility are just afraid of commitment. Very soon they now see that sex fades away, libidos drop and ur spouse becomes more like a brother or sister. It is the companionship that they provide that keeps the marriage going.

By the way, great sex doesn't prevent cheating!

ronald4lif:


Premarital sex is a premise to marriage. Meaning it's done before marriage. It's not premarital sex if two lovebirds never got married. So the OP argument is flawed on this basis.

Again, sex is a beautiful symbol of the connection between two people, not a beautiful symbol of having a marriage certificate.

What about couples who don't want to get married? Should they not have sex just because they won't go to a registry and sign a marriage paperwork? Does that legal piece of paper diminish the love and commitment they feel for each other?

Pre-marital sex is not immoral (when indulge with someone a person love, trust and committed to), and I have yet to hear a viable argument that it is. Consensual sexual relations between adults capable of making such decisions are not immoral acts. You believe it to be, but that doesn't mean it is.

Part of what makes two people right for each other is their sexual chemistry. If you don't know whether or not you have that chemistry before you get married, you may be adding to the possibility of your marriage ending in divorce.

Lastly, most of what the OP highlighted can still be experienced when married and sexual incompatibilities have been responsible for many broken marriages worldwide. So not test driving and getting married without ascertaining sexual chemistry doesn't guarantee the marriage would last either. There's a thing called divorce.

Wish you posited better arguments. I regret to say that your points don't appear logical (at least to me). I may not necessarily give counter arguments to yours cos deep in your heart, you know the truth.

I would be crazy to admit that EVERY consensual sexual rltnshp btw two adults is moral, only the ones within the marriage bracket is moral by any societal standards. No man would accept his wife sleeping with another man simply because their affair is 'consensual'; moreso no society accepts that as being moral......many other examples abound.
And sexual chemistry has never made couples right for each other, there are rather many other important things to consider.

treasuremabel:


Am too matured n reserved to argue or respond to this

be not dismayed, many love to believe in a lie and avoid the truth. Just stay true

God bless you for this post!

vfactor:


How thoroughly can u know??

Since you re married, tell me: how much did u know about ur spouse before u got married? Is it anywhere near what u know now??


I believe people who try to test for sexual compatibility are just afraid of commitment. Very soon they now see that sex fades away, libidos drop and ur spouse becomes more like a brother or sister. It is the companionship that they provide that keeps the marriage going.

By the way, great sex doesn't prevent cheating!

You've made some valid points. But, with that being said, I have been happily married for 15 years, give or take a few weeks so I think I know a thing or two about the subject. Sex is not the most important thing in a marriage but it is still freaking important. Yes, libidos drop which is why both couples need to find ways to spice it up regularly. I could tell you the kinky things we get up to so that our sex life stays active. And it works. And yes, I know as much now, as I did before we got married because I insisted that we live together for a year. I am the one to live with her and no one else. So, if the marriage goes sideways I am the one to bear the full brunt. I don't care who you are but there's no way you can pretend for a whole year. Everything in marriage is not all about the thumping of the heart. One has to use one's head as much as the heart.

Hmm...

Bollinger:


You've made some valid points. But, with that being said, I have been happily married for 15 years, give or take a few weeks so I think I know a thing or two about the subject. Sex is not the most important thing in a marriage but it is still freaking important. Yes, libidos drop which is why both couples need to find ways to spice it up regularly. I could tell you the kinky things we get up to so that our sex life stays active. And it works. And yes, I know as much now, as I did before we got married because I insisted that we live together for a year. I am the one to live with her and no one else. So, if the marriage goes sideways I am the one to bear the full brunt. I don't care who you are but there's no way you can pretend for a whole year. Everything in marriage is not all about the thumping of the heart. One has to use one's head as much as the heart.

So what he's saying is not wrong. Cos from your experience it doesn't disprove his point. There re couples who are married for close to 30yrs now and they never lived together or tested themselves sexually. In all commitment and sincere çommunication makes for most thing we don't know before marriage!

DandyWalker:
Brain is valued for both male and female. In the light of male-to- female relationship, chastity is key for the ladies, while for the guy, the financial ability to take care of his wife.

I guess you have a point

searay:
OK.




My Facebook has been hacked a beg I need help.to recover it. The person is just rubbishing me out there

change your password.
hope it works.

emperorchedda:
Until you marry a guy who can't get his ddick up after the first round then you'll know how invalid all these your points are

my dear, everything is not about 'manhood'. Learn to please her in other ways.

vfactor:


So what he's saying is not wrong. Cos from your experience it doesn't disprove his point. There re couples who are married for close to 30yrs now and they never lived together or tested themselves sexually. In all commitment and sincere çommunication makes for most thing we don't know before marriage!

True. But you have to remember our time is different from our parents time. The issue of testing the sexual parameters of a relationship is a non issue because almost everyone of legal age engages in it as it is. As far as i am concerned and based on my personal experience, the known is better than the unknown.

Its a big lie. One of the number problem of marriages des days. It s d problem sexual compatibility. Pls test that man or woman to know her sexual life. Its very very important. Marriage is for life......

StrawberryLaLa:
God bless you for this post!

may your blessing be unwavering.

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