Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? - Family (4) - Nairaland
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? (23336 Views)
Man Kills Big Catfish For His Wife To Celebrate The Birth Of Their Baby Boy / Abandoned Nine-month-old Baby Crawling On Lagos Road Found / Wife Quarrels With Husband, Dumps Six-month-old Baby On Waste (2) (3) (4)
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (Reply) (Go Down)
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by Cutehector(m): 3:24pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Midehi:I just dnt think its a good idea.... Whr will d husband and wife sleep? And sex too?  hian... Abeg.. She shouldn't work jor! She is a nursing mother... |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by MKO4ever(m): 3:27pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Burger01: But he should make sure that his wife's salary is more than the nanny's salary oo, else they will be running a deficit budget 5 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by crackhouse(m): 3:30pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Call a relation, maybe ur sister or any trusted close person to take care of the child until he's grown to a year+ even if requires paying the person monthly. It's better than for ur wife to loose her job for sth that can be taken care for few months. Work is hard to come by these days so don't loose the one u have. 5 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by Nweike1: 3:30pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
NEVER IN YOUR LIFE TRY DAT!!! Manage, God will provide |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by sainty2k3(m): 3:32pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
MOORCHMOORE:What if she was already employed even before getting pregnant , will u ask her to resign, the most generous martenity leave will only last till 12 weeks after delivery. I think majority of females responding here are either a housewife or still single, u need to hear from the people who were gainfully employed. They'll tell u how they managed the situation. 8 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by eyeon(m): 3:32pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
She is your wife. From your story, you both need that job for her. But since it now has many challenges; try as much as you can to make you both reason as one. That way, this issue wount create conflict between you two. #Goodluck. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by beyoncausme: 3:34pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
baby first oo..
|
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by zoe123: 3:35pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
if there's a close relative living with you guyz,why not.Most private organisations in Nigeria give only 3 months maternity leave.So even if she decides to wait till the child is a bit old before starting then what happens if she takes in again? 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by TemmyWon(f): 3:40pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Females speaking against your wife getting a job either don't have a job or a baby. everyone does it, my boss only gives 5wks and peeps stl don't quit. get crèche services close by, "everyone is in on it" some friends squueze milk while some friends work wt baby food yet they have adorable strong babies. 6 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by tivta(m): 3:46pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
kilode100:Yet if any thing happens to the child she will blame the man abi? You can't eat your cake and have it. |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by blackboy(m): 3:52pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
I think what you should do is to tell your wife to go and laminate her certificate and frame it then hang them on the wall or go file them somewhere in the house because 4 months is too young for you to let her leave the baby for some hours in the day. Simply tell her she should forget pursuing a career until the 2 of you are done procreating. This is your first child. How old is she and how many do you intend to have . Child spacing ..2 years spacing. Because in most offices the standard maternity leave is 3 months so if your wife gets pregnant after starting a job you will ask her to resign because she can't resume her work and put your child in day care or with someone to care for. It's the real world only a very few organization allow a woman after giving birth stay more than 3 months away from work. Discuss with your pediatrician and see what is best for your child and also consider your wife , she went to school to have a career except both of you agreed she be a housewife and fulltime mother. I know of cases even younger in Nigeria mothers have had to put their children in daycare. The children are a lot older now and doing well in school and looking even more handsome than their dad. 3 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by Beync(f): 3:52pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
In that case get a good nanny asap. Its not a good thing to leave such a baby with someone to nurse but considering your family economy, she need to work. Except you are getting a better job soon |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by Good2love(m): 3:52pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Get $25 when you sign up #Payoneer w/ my link. Available in over 200 countries worldwide! http://share.payoneer-affiliates.com/v2/share/6169888720686704136 |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by Nobody: 3:53pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Emmahunk:. Hi Mr Suspicion, can you please answer the question the OP asked  1 Like |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by markidoo(m): 3:55pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
dats kool |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by freecocoa(f): 3:59pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
My cousin's baby started creche at exactly 3 months, she's a year plus now and still goes there, she's turned out perfectly fine. Just look for a very good centre and you'll be alright. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by chuksbogus: 4:02pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
I don't see why u should come here to ask this question. U called yourself A LOW INCOME EARNER and now your wife got a job to assist u and u are here talking about a 4months old baby. civil servants how many months maternity leave do they have before resuming work? so each time they give birth they will resign to look for another work after one year abi? guy put your baby in a day care and praise God for his favour!!! did you see another work and u are still in that low income earning job? my dear don't throw away God given favour cos no amount of fasting will bring another 5 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by coldFLARES1(m): 4:09pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
MOORCHMOORE:If your wife dies today, will you bury your son with her? Use your head bros! else your may contend with resentment and rebellion your marriage may never survive. 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by Emmahunk(m): 4:11pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Insidous: If the answer to the OP's question is not clear enough to you in the post, then am so sorry I can't help you further. Guess you picked only what you wanted. |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by samcidon(m): 4:21pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Guy abeg free am mak she go work, u still say em dey easy to get work 4 naija? 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by ladyF(f): 4:26pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Mehn I'm reading comments here and I'm like wtf!!!  So the wife should not go to work because there is a 4 month old baby? Maternity leave is 3 months, so any lady that births a child should resign from her job ni? This is craaaazzyyyyyy.See them opening their mouth to say NO, oya Mr husband, resign from ur own job and take care of the baby na, let ur wife not miss that offer abeg. I take God beg u. Just put urself in her shoes moorchmoore .....u won't quit ur own job for the baby, don't make her quit hers, don't be selfish pls. This isnt even about feminism but the man that will tell me to quit my job and do house wife ehnnn, dem never born am. Careers is just as important as family. 5 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by omonnakoda: 4:40pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
This is 2015,any man who wants to be lord should make money like a lord otherwise you are part of the rat race of people who have to sell their time for food and shelter.It is that basic. If I understand you properly you are not in a financial position to cater for your family and your wife now has the option of being in such a position. Well the banks at Ikorodu and Ijede are still there so you can try your luck.If you are not that bold you better let your wife go to work so she can feed and clothe your broke ass. There does not seem to be anything to discuss.What if she had died at childbirth won't the child survive? Who said it must be the woman looking after the child? You stay at home and look after the child,what is wrong with that. That is the rational thing to do. The other issue is your ego which you have to deal with and face reality which is that your ass is broke Did you not think what the child would eat before you got married? 5 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by adanduka: 4:45pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
MOORCHMOORE: How much do you give her every month for herself? You probably want her to understand that you can't give her money because you don't earn that much. Your mother or hers can take care of the baby. Let her work. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by ChelseaDr(m): 4:50pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Op, where is your wife rushing to? Leave a 3-month old boy? for who? because of how much? Not even baby friendly? l bet you if she cant spare 6 months of exclusive breast feeding then that boy is as good as being on his own...talk about mother-to-child bonding, the boy will completely miss out? Haba! If the child starts misbehaving tomorrow then you blame the devil. Madam stay and breastfeed and immunize your child up to 9 months...a better offer will come. Meanwhile if you insist, follow the advise of bushdoc9919, he nailed it. |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by ajimega: 4:51pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Your wife still has her mother, so she should take her son to her and be rest assured that all his well cos our mums want to care for our kids with no complains so she can work and help with the bills. Don't panic he will be fine i can assure you. |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by twinee(f): 4:55pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
U should allow her work. Look around u will definitely find a school that admits infants, that is f u have tried the possibility of ur mother in-law taking care of the baby and it doesn't work out 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by BukkyBayo(f): 5:02pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Young Man...How many Nigerians are unemployed, Plenty of them!!! And a wife for that matter has a good job, now because of a child God has given you, you decide to stop her from working. Ask yourself these questions: 1. What stops you from sending him to the daycare like bankers and other employed pple do 2. What stops you from getting a relation of family member to baby sit 3. Are you ready to provide all her needs when she eventually stops working. I'm sure for example she takes care of feeding in the house. Now she eventually stops working and every morning she comes to ask you money for this and that. you start having issues with her because of this and at the end of the day, you'll start regretting why you even stopped her from working. I so much believe that when a woman is helping out in the family needs, things tend to be better. Please allow your woman to work. One last question you should ask yourself, will your woman be happy with this decision? |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by bemyguest(f): 5:02pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Don't mind those advising you allow her nurse the child till a year. She should take the child to day care in the mornings pick the child up by 5pm max and head home. That's what all working mums do. Am taking from experience not hearsay. Look for a good day care the Lord will help you both. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by yinkuschua(m): 5:03pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Really this kind of decision isn't easy but bro.. if u guys can work something out with finding a daycare or so around where she works or probably close to the house then it could be cool.. but bro... as for me oh..I won't until d baby is 2 or more sef... So pray for wisdom before taking any decision.. |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by lifenajeje(m): 5:03pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
I was in this same situation 2011 but my own case had to do with my wife during her service year...... I was earning 50k then yearned for extra income... nobody would take care of your child more than the mother but in such situation you need a near perfect alternative... bringing in your siblings means inconveniencing their programs....except either of you have one that is emotionally attached to children.a sibling is additional expenses especially if the person is not understanding enough....na that time ur family go hear say Una dey eat with no meat....the burden can be much on your sibling and it brings bad blood....i had experience from both sides..but there are good siblings who can do the job if they are free....like my immediate younger sis or my wife's elder sis anytime they are around even till date I and my wife go sleep in a hotel for 2 days- 2 weeks...but the rest of our siblings is a no no. there are good nannies but where do u find one?cos percentage of my friends with bad experience far more than good. there are daycares that can take care of even a week old baby...ask around from neighbors ,,,church or mosque members , colleagues.... Some don't even have sign boards but are sure good. say ur location as someone on nairaland can recommend one to you.... lastline...be sure you can pay for the daycare from your budget for at least three months cos if your wife happens to work in an organization that owes salary sorry na your name....i say this cos my wife insisted she will pay for daycare with her allowed cos I had to give her feeding and transport money then but she did not get paid for the first three months and she pledge the one she received in camp for something. your wife should start work on Monday after u see a good daycare ... wish u luck |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by mamajaz(f): 5:08pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Chai... westenization has done us much harm. In the days of face to face houses, such challenges are minimal. Those were the days that mother inlaws too know and perform their responsibilities to letter for a responsible daugter in law. If she is a government worker, she will have 112 or 120 days mat leave, that's if she is even due for mat leave and back to work she goes. I know she will definitely have more babies and she would not be pulling out of work all the times. That is if she has being in the service for a year oh. If you are super comfortable, I would have said 'NO', but now that she needs to augument whatever is coming in and no creche at her workplace; It will be helpful if any of the in laws will come and stay. If you have good grip of your first degree family, your momma should do. Now, what we did and it worked for us was after my mat leave my husband got his leave and became the baby sitter,before his leave expired one granny offered to come and help us from the village, she stayed till baby clocked one and left (and she did a great job),said she will still come again On your part,I will advice you get a breast pump,express milk through the night, keep inside fridge or cold water (you may look up how to store breast milk at google). Put that visiting in law through your desired line of care for your child, and watch her do while she prepares for resumption. Above all, pray to God for guidance. My husband actually objected to creche 'cos a friend's baby was mistakenly fed with another baby's bm. But that will not be the case always, I was the one that told him the story and even forgot about it not knowing that he would hold on tenacioudly to it. I pray God guide you to make appropriate decision and send the needed help your way. If in need of more help, do mail me sadeseyi4eva@gmail.com |
| Re: Should I Allow My Wife To Leave Our 4 Month-Old-Baby And Start Work? by fabrigas18(m): 5:10pm On Jul 10, 2015 |
Get free DSTV/GOTV Subscriptions on this websites 1) worldsmshub.com 2) verifiables.com 3) olibank.com 4) wwcourier.org 5) donegadgets.com.ng 6) mykenyajoboffer.com Check the websites and refresh constantly you will sure find the link.. Thank me later |
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (Reply)
Should A Woman Change Her State Of Origin After Marriage? / Since You Know Your Partner Is Not Satisfying You, Why Accept To Marry & Cheat / Bringing A Househelp From Nigeria To London. Pls Advise!
(Go Up)
| Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 62 |