On Gender Equality and Sharing of roles.
Written by Rx Robinho.

Dear Reader, as you read this article, you might need to forgive the grumpiness of the writer. Also you might need to read through to catch his opinion. Gender equality has got to be the most laughable debate that has continued to gain face in the last 10 years. However, I’ve been sulky on this matter for unknown reasons. Presently, the anger I’m brimming with was stirred by Mrs Chimamanda Adichie. You know her? Yes, the same ‘unofficial leader’ of the feminist movement.

However, you might want to do three things to justify or oppose the subject matter. First, you can reject tradition and wholly embrace civilization. Second, you can reject civilization and wholly embrace tradition, society sees this kind of people as backward. Third, you put a balance between tradition and civilization, this is easier said than done, although it is not impossible. You must be wondering what tradition I’m referring to. No, it’s not the Yoruba or igbo native tradition. It transcends beyond this. As you read through, you would grab the idea of tradition in this context.

I engaged in a conversation with a female colleague a few weeks ago. The conversation started on a high note but suddenly ended in an highly objectionable manner when it tilted towards gender equality. What was her offence? She began to assert that she would share cooking roles with whoever she gets married to, she was not ready to become a slave to any man and all sort. Of course, you can guess I didn’t agree with her. She probably read Chimamanda’s latest speech on the subject which I shared via BBM and she was inspired. This article is for people like her.

The Nigeran Female Species

I do not want to be brutal on this. Probably because I do not want to offend some folks. However, the truth is obvious. The average Nigerian Female Specie doesn’t have the slightest idea what a relationship means. A typical Nigerian lady is the “buy me an iPad, take me on a trip to Paris, all-about-sex” kind of lady. I would write about the sex part later, it depends on so many factors. The situation is so bad, you might want to count your sister or friend out. You’ll find out sooner than never. The social media has done its major part in spreading this conundrum, and it’s not about to stop soon.

Adam and Eve. The analysis.

I do not like to quote Bible in my articles, except when I nurse serious resentment towards an issue and I want to prove my point. If you are an atheist, this article is not for you, you can slide away! And even if you are a theist, you can choose to agree or not. In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. Fast forward to the part God formed Adam from the dust of the ground. After a while, God said it wasn’t good for man to be alone, so he made an help meet for him. Emphasis on ‘help meet’. If you move further, you’ll read about the fall of man. I’d love to dwell a little here. When Adam was created, he was given a clear instruction “But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it, for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die”. After Eve was made, the serpent came and went straight to Eve for a reason. Females have been gullible from the inception. The serpent then tossed a coin by asking Eve, “Hath God said ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden? Eve replied, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden, but of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die. You probably know the rest of the story. It will take a more critical mind to spot the disparity between what God said to Adam and how Eve reported the speech. Women have had the traits of mis-reporting when reporting speeches. It started with Eve. Moreover, there was probably a communication gap between the two, because Eve hadn’t even been named at this point. Fast forward, Eve ate the fruit, gave it to Adam. Adam ate it likewise after which they discovered their unclothedness. Now, this action brought weighty consequences. God cursed the snake, the man and the woman. Let us take a look at the curse that was dished out to the woman. God said, “I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, AND HE SHALL RULE OVER THEE. Who knows if gender equality was in God’s plan for us, but gender equality died there and then. Do not tell me that this curse has gone with the old testament and Jesus has brought grace. The snake and the man’s curse are still visible today, likewise the pain of conception. This is what I meant by tradition. The man has been the head of the home since inception. Perhaps, you know the meaning of the word ‘rule’.

The Real Issue.

To begin to bring up and train our daughters, nurture them to believe gender equality is totally absurd. Apparently, the conundrum has become harder to tackle when confronted with confusing terms such as ‘human rights’, ‘women exclusion’, ‘gender expectations’. These are the terms you’ll find when you read Mrs Adichie. Although she is not entirely wrong. I began to pay closer attention when she said, “We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. We say to girls: You can have ambition, but not too much. You should aim to be successful, but not too successful, otherwise you will threaten the man. If you are the breadwinner in your relationship with a man, pretend that you are not, especially in public, otherwise you will emasculate him.” In the last century, the world has been imposed with stints of ‘women empowerment’. This was meant to see that, more women get educated and get independent. While this also is not bad, it has been misinterpreted. And you know what they say “give a woman a step, she would go a mile”. The real issue is the amount of broken homes that feminism has caused. The real issue is the chunk of unhappy women who are uncomfortable in their marriages. The real issue is the population who find it hard to get married because of their faith in feminism. The real issue is that gender inequality should not be to the detriment of the females. So they do not get maltreated. Perhaps, it’s a concept you would need to pay more attention to before you grasp.

The Way Out.

Well, is there any way out? This is a question that has some philosophical undertone. I find it hard to answer. I’d prefer to be ultra-pessimistic and tell you there isn’t any way out. You can only read through, reassess the situation, make necessary changes and expunge gender equality. The way out is to understand the reason for feminism and not to believe it in its entirety. The way out is to find purpose and pursue it. You know what, I have a lecturer I love so much. Dr Mrs Bamiro, a pharmacist and a lecturer. She is as busy as you can think. Yet she tells us that her husband is her first priority, she would go on to advise the young ladies to balance career and family life. She has balanced tradition with civilization. She should naturally become a role model to our young ladies. Sadly, our society doesn’t celebrate people like this. Therefore, the way out seems to be elusive and is an endless search for a non existent solution.

Rx Robinho writes from the faculty of pharmacy, Olabisi Onabanjo University. You can engage him via email: adeola_drg@yahoo.com or twitter:@Rx_Deyholar

Cc: odumchi, Fulaman198, bigfrancis21, lalasticlala, Obinoscopy

Gender equality...

Gender equality & feminism are all rubbish crusades.
The major truth is that women tend to switch in between personas so as to survive in all conditions & also to suit their useless motive.
When it comes to the paying of bills, waking up in the night to do a daring task etc., they will say, women are by default weaker vessels so men who were made stronger are to man up to the current situation at hand. But when it comes to juicy things, they will try to prove relevance or self-importance. Nonsense.
My wife won't dare this at home cos I'm going to divide the whole burden of the family into 2 and pass one to her.
Feminist... Feminazi, my foot! nonsense!

I would have loved to give a technical reply to this post, but I'll just put some humour in it cos that's how I feel.
Woman 1: Who are we?
Crowd : Women
Woman 1: What do we want?
Crowd : We don't know
Woman 1: When do we want it?
Crowd : Now