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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Attention:how To Shower (1738 Views)
Promiscuous Wife Forced To Shower Outside As A Sign Of Traditional Cleansing / I Visisted My Girlfriend When She Was In The Bathroom To Shower / How To Shower (men & Women) (2) (3) (4)
Attention:how To Shower by chioya(f): 8:19pm On Mar 24, 2009 |
SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN 1. Take off clothing and place it in a sectioned laundry hamper according to lights, darks, whites, man made or natural. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If husband is seen along the way cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom. 3. Look at womanly physique in the mirror and stick out belly. Complain and whine about getting fat. 4. Get in shower. Look for facecloth, arm cloth, loin cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 5. Wash hair once with Cucumber and Lamprey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. Wash hair again with Cucumber and Lamprey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. 6. Condition hair with cucumber and lamprey conditioner with enhanced natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes. 7. Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red raw. 8. Rinse conditioner off hair taking at least 15 minutes to make sure that it's all come off. 9. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead. 10. Scream loudly when husband flushes toilet and water loses pressure and turns red hot. 11. Turn off shower. 12. Squeegee all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mould spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of small African country. 13. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel. 14. Check entire body for remotest sign of spots. Attack with nails and or tweezers (if you can find them). 15. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If husband is seen, cover up any exposed areas and then rush to bedroom to spend hour and a half getting dressed. SHOWER LIKE A MAN 1. Take off clothes while sitting on bed and leave them in a pile. 2. Walk naked to bathroom. If wife seen, shake knob at her while shouting "Way Hey!!" 3. Look in mirror and suck in gut to see your manly physique. 4. Admire size of knob in mirror, scratch bollocks and smell fingers for one last whiff. Get in shower. 5. Don't bother to look for wash cloth, don't need one. 6. Wash face. 7. Wash armpits. 8. Laugh at how loud farts sound in the shower. 9. Wash bollocks and the surrounding area. 10. Wash arse, leaving hair on soap. 11. Shampoo hair but do not use conditioner. 12. Make Mohican hairstyle with shampoo. Pull back curtain to see self in mirror. 13. Piss in shower. 14. Rinse off and get out of shower. Fail to notice water on floor because shower curtain outside bath for whole shower time. Partially dry off. 15. Look at self in mirror, flex muscles and admire size of knob (Charlie) again. 16. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on floor. 17. Leave bathroom light and fan on. 18. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, grab knob, go "Yeah baby" and thrust pelvis at her. 19. Put on yesterday's clothes |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by romsky: 12:34pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
chioya don born anoda pikin |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by chioya(f): 5:44pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
pomade who tell u? |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by ravenzord(m): 5:51pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
LOL, dis is so not true, newais even if it was I prefer d man's version, more cost-effective and less time consuming. |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by tytylayor: 5:59pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
chioya its gud to go on holls o, i bet dis are ur experiences, but u didn't say anytin bout d babies nw, where u keep dem all d while |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by sholabanke(m): 6:03pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
hmmmmmmmmmmm let wait for another 2 months they will reveal themselves |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by chioya(f): 6:07pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
@TYTY wat do u pple want my babies for oooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,leave me naaaaaaaaaaaaa |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by sholabanke(m): 6:59pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
maybe for , |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by mykali(m): 7:11pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
loooooool maddam chioya is back. . . , all thanx to me. and that joke was really typical. apart from the scratching part and the farting part, i do ''almost'' everything else |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by sholabanke(m): 7:16pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
more grease to ur elbow then |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by chioya(f): 8:39pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
@mykali u too madam mykali @shola dey send u, |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by LuCiA2(f): 9:18pm On Mar 25, 2009 |
hmmm do women really do all that much to bathe. well, i know i dont but it looks like there are people who do. i can say the part about men is partially true. |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by oge4real(f): 2:58am On Mar 26, 2009 |
@poster. do you really do this? |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by romsky: 9:05am On Mar 26, 2009 |
yes she does d female part, witnessed d male part & soon to xperience d pikin part |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by clemcykul(f): 10:27am On Mar 26, 2009 |
hmmm |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by tytylayor: 10:28am On Mar 26, 2009 |
hmmmmm2 |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by jamace(m): 12:08pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
Na wa o. |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by Lolabbey: 12:11pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
real wah |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by clemcykul(f): 2:03pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
lola take style buy new pant na, this wan don hear am for thread and needle hand |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by tytylayor: 2:12pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
she go manage am till next aswani market, if u don get new bail, make u call her |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by clemcykul(f): 2:24pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
i go try. lola too like okrika i no know why |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by tytylayor: 2:28pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
ass wey too big, na their problem be dat |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by romsky: 2:31pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
flat bottom tytyrayol ow u dey |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by tytylayor: 2:41pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
omo i too ploud, no pant wey no dey wear me |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by romsky: 2:45pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
but nuttin 4 moi to pat or fiddle with |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by tytylayor: 2:53pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
not necessary, so far u av somtin to use as ue table |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by romsky: 2:57pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
i luv springy buuts makes its more fun wen u get bounced |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by tytylayor: 2:59pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
hire lola for dat den |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by romsky: 3:01pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
i dont lyk 2nd hand babes |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by benedictac(f): 3:04pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
u mean 2nd hand citizens? |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by tytylayor: 3:13pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
romade: oooo not lola, lola is ochara, tear rubber |
Re: Attention:how To Shower by clemcykul(f): 3:18pm On Mar 26, 2009 |
so her bla bla bla sabi tear rubber? |
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