A fool and his money are soon partying.

Money can't buy love. But it can rent a very close imitation.

Eagles may soar, but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

He who hesitates is probably right.

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.

The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles

Two wrongs are only the beginning

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory

If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before

Change is inevitable, except from vending machines

Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow

Always try to be modest. And be damn proud of it!

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments

Everybody repeat after me, "We are all individuals."

Death to all fanatics!

Chastity is curable, if detected early

Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener

Bills travel through the post at twice the speed of cheques

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now

Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back

Beware of geeks bearing gifs

Half the people you know are below average

99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name

42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good

If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you

Good definitions.

@poster,

I love this!

u better do

"Money cant buy LOVE but it can rent a very close immitation"

hahahhaaaaa
for how long now?

for as long as the rent is not expired

good

yeah am good

who tell u

your babe na

she no fit try am

u wish, i just took her out for shoppn, very soon she go soon born for me

u tink say na moin moin abi?

na akara she be dey tink sef

eyaa poor romade