“Tall, dark and handsome”, is usually the response you get when you ask a lady what she wants In a man. Unfortunately, cupid is no respecter of wishes. You get what you get. The heart wants what it wants right? This usually isn’t a bad thing. This is because if he isn’t dark, light skinned; boys are perceived to be incredibly cute too. If he isn’t handsome, well, we all know money can clean a guy up real good. Just recollect 50 cent, the rapper when he began and what he looks like now. Finally, as a girl, how hard would it be for you to find a man that is taller than you? Yeah, like 50 years ago! Thanks to our genes and DNA evolution, women are getting taller (the average height being dangerously close to 6ft), and seems like the men have reached the height of their evolution (pun intended).

With women being so tall these days and most men being on the …. Well, average side. It makes picking your ideal man harder. As a tall girl, I guarantee that by the age of 25 you would have dated at least one guy that is about 2-3 inches shorter than you. This is not an article to “boo-hoo” over the fact that you are tall, neither is it the avenue for you to wallow in misery of being surrounded by short men. If cupid struck you with the love arrow and pinned you down to a short guy, there are some guidelines you should know.

First off:

Your height is gorgeous! We tall girls have spent the whole of our high school years and some after, being teased for being “too tall”. As we have matured into beautiful young ladies, eligible to start dating, we have embraced our height and have seen it is actually something of envy amongst other women and men. As a kid you would think it’s a bad thing because you always stand out, when all you want to do is fit in. You can’t possibly hate being tall; at least just for reasons like you can reach the top shelf and have extremely sexy long legs. Now that we have established that your height is beautiful and it’s what everybody wants, you have to understand that your short lover had the opposite experience growing up.

I don’t know if it’s just me, but there are lots of cute short boys. They probably were one of the popular kids in high school; being cute and all (just like puppies). They never stood out for awkward reasons and everything they did was adorable and dreamy. But enter senior year/ matric/SS3 whatever you may know it as, the short boys realize they are not growing as much as some others. The girls start drifting towards the more “caveman manly” types, the ones that look like they can protect them, the ones that stand out from the crowd, the ones that make her feel small and dainty. Since the biological and spiritual purpose of a man is to win an adequate mate, provide, profess, and protect (all that manly stuff); there on lies the beginning of the formation of the “Napoleon complex” also known as “short man syndrome”.

NAPOLEON COMPLEX IS A PEJORATIVE TERM DESCRIBING A DIS-PROVEN PSYCHOLOGICAL CONDITION THAT IS SAID TO EXIST IN PEOPLE, BOTH MEN AND WOMEN, OF SHORT STATURE. IT IS CHARACTERIZED BY OVER-AGGRESSIVE OR DOMINEERING SOCIAL BEHAVIOUR, AND CARRIES THE IMPLICATION THAT SUCH BEHAVIOUR IS COMPENSATORY FOR THE SUBJECT STATURE. THE TERM IS ALSO USED MORE GENERICALLY TO DESCRIBE PEOPLE WHO ARE DRIVEN BY A PERCEIVED HANDICAP TO OVER COMPENSATE IN OTHER ASPECTS OF THEIR LIVES. [WIKIPEDIA 2015]

There you have it. So you love a short guy, and a short guy loves you. You may be having some problems with your relationship; but my dear, it’s not all you. Dating a short guy is dating a different breed of men. They are delicate and view the world as looking down on them because of their lack of height, meanwhile it is just their angle (another pun intended). Dating a short guy is like playing polo in a mine field. One wrong move and everything comes tumbling down. It’s really not their fault; it’s just psychology affected by biology. So here are some guidelines when it comes to tall ladies dating short men.

Do not emasculate him.

All men have an ego, but those of short men seem to be a tad bit more fragile. So, be gentle! No matter how you play it, a tall, smart beautiful girl would be intimidating to anyone, whether tall or short, male or female. You have to be careful not to bruise his ego. Make sure you always make him feel like the man. If you need some heavy lifting done, or your light bulb changed; though you can do it yourself, ask him for help from time to time. This would always make him feel like he can still protect you, provide for you, and take care of you. Do not intentionally disrespect him. Some of us girls tend to go a little crazy with drama; a short guy would give you drama back!! This is because he feels the need to regain his position (back on top). Disrespecting him would make him feel he is not the alpha in the relationship or like his opinion is not heard, thus not valued. Such things do not really faze regular people, but do remember I said you are dealing with a different breed of men!!

Communication is key.

For some odd reason, short men tend to get jealous real fast. A regular text message at the wrong time or place can turn a good day sour. When dealing with short men, remember you are trying to change a psyche that they have had since their late adolescence. Patience is the key!! You need to be very honest and keep the lines of communication open and steady. After a while, he would be conditioned to understand, there is really no reason to be getting so jealous all the time and over little things. No secrets with these ones!!

Invest in flat shoes / sandals.

Most short guys are actually attracted to tall girls. I don’t know why. Opposites attract maybe? Nevertheless, no matter how sexy and long he says your legs look when you are in heels, honestly he doesn’t want you in 4-inch heels all the time!! He is trying to bridge the gap by compensating in other ways, and rubbing the height difference in his face whenever you go out on a date is a “no no”. Invest in some cool new flats or sandals. Don’t roll your eyes. They don’t always make you look like a school teacher; there are some cool trendy styles. Besides, you got to make sacrifices in a relationship, even vertical accentuating sacrifices. Hey, you can’t help who you love!

Best dressed.

Endeavour to always look good when going out together. If your man doesn’t know how to dress, teach him. Dressing well allows for his body frame an image of extension. Consult a stylist if you have to. No need for him looking shorter than he already is because he cannot put together a stellar outfit. If your man does know how to dress however, make sure you get on the same style page as him. That way when you go out in public, looking good distracts the eyes and always makes the height difference quite excusable.

Finally, Date the right man.

No advice or guidelines in the world would work if you are not dating the right man. Napoleon complex is not an excuse to being a bad partner. It’s a state of mind that can be changed, with patience and love. Look ladies, I know I said patience, but do not grow old there!! If you have handled the relationship the best way you can, there is no need for you to keep trying if you are not penetrating his psyche. The complex makes it hard to have a shift in his school of thought. If you are dating the right man however, getting through to him should not be a battlefield for too long. He would endeavour to adjust his complex problems, so as to love you better.

Basically patience is important, but do not lose your self-respect. “The greatest thing is to love and be loved in return” – Moulin Rouge. So whether your man is short, tall, handsome or ugly, when you find love; enjoy it and treasure it. Practice love with patience and kindness. I wish you all the best in your “short-men relationships”.

OK ladies let’s have your ideas on this…..

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No doubt about that brov

Tall girls rock

am 5.8ft tall while my babe is 5.5ft, is she short?

dis thread is too tall...

sorry its tall... its just to get the details

[email] Tried reading it, but it's too long. Anyway from the comment and topic, I get that tall girls rock! [/email]

men have not reached the height of their evolution. thank you very much.

haven't you checked the height ratios of the world countries recently? men are still taller. sure, female height may be getting closer to six feet. but male height is approaching seven feet as well. nowadays, it is not uncommon to see 6'5 guys around.

apart from this, well, nice article. now we just have to find a way to convince egoistic shorties to date taller girls

I am short,and people do commend my gentility and mild temper