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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis (14085 Views)
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10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by tonychristopher: 5:35pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
10 reasons to never date a man with a big penis 10 reasons to never date a man with a big penis And it’s curvy as well?! Trouser snake. One-eyed monster. 100 per cent all-beef thermometer. Pink tractor beam. Tent pole. Purple-headed soldier man. Men. You may be under the impression that, when it comes to your penis, bigger is better. This is a lie spread by porn, probably because it’s just easier to see bigger ones on screen. But in actual fact, as most ladies know, dating someone with an anaconda truly worthy of the name is actually a hindrance. Here’s why. 1. Normal condoms don’t fit Which you’d think might make everyone smug. In fact, it results in sex being delayed for at least a week while you try to track down a specialist supplier who, naturally, charges triple the price for XXLs. 2. Vaginas don’t fit Or rather, it doesn’t fit any vaginas. It’s a bit like trying to squeeze Optimus Prime into an aeroplane loo. Any kind of action is going to require serious forward-planning and very careful manoeuvers if you want to avoid serious damage to one or both parties. 3. Cystitis Because nothing says romance like bruising your girlfriend’s urethra so badly she ends up peeing fire. 4. Anal 5. A very real risk of suffocation In porn the whole ‘woman almost choking on man meat’ is probably quite hot. In real life no woman wants to go out like that. 6. Vanilla sex With a small or average-sized member you can both rut away to your little hearts’ content with you on top, them on top, sitting down, from behind, from the side and so on, in an almost unending series of combinations. Larger lads have to content themselves with one ole faithful – whichever one doesn’t make their lady howl in agony. Whoa there, buddy. Your big banana schlong may not be such a cause for celebration 7. Bleeding Because, for some men, the term pork sword is unfortunately accurate. 8. Careful, measured sex OK, so there’s no downside to the fact several hours of pre-intimacy becomes a necessity rather than a nicety.But you’ll never have fast, passionate, ‘animal’ sex without a lot of pain afterwards. 9. You will always need lubeAlways. Fancy a quickie in the back of your Fiesta in the station car park?Yeah. I hope you carry lube around in your handbag. 10. They’re messy to look at The whole of classical Greek sculpture shuns your out-of-proportion yogurt slinger. 1 Like 3 Shares |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:37pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
2 Likes |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Johnnoah1st: 5:38pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
tonychristopher:Go and do pennis enlargement surgery and ur own will surely come instead of giving up and discouraging girl from sampling big diccks. my2cent 3 Likes |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:39pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
E better pass your toothpick 3 Likes |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:40pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
By big, how many inches do u mean? 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:40pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
Guys dem, this for u! And for d ladies that love dem big, this is also for u! 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by tonychristopher: 5:42pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
8 inch upwards when flacid Durentt: |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:43pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
lagmostkuit:Madame, Do You Love Them small |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:45pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
rexkexmilan:Sir, it's not for you to know! 4 Likes |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:46pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
tonychristopher:Jesus *faints* 2 Likes |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by dmola(m): 5:47pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
...... |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:52pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
Lmao! Pencil d!cks aint all bad Thanks to Jah! |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 5:52pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
lagmostkuit:Okay Ma. But If you happen to like Them small, then you can come to papa . 2 Likes |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 6:07pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
rexkexmilan:Pele ti e |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Luizkid(m): 6:08pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
like serzly, what hath thou sayet?? |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 6:10pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
lagmostkuit: |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 6:13pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 6:16pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
lagmostkuit:What does "pele ti e" Mean |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 6:39pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
rexkexmilan:Dunno sef Buh I think it means "sorry for yourself" |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 8:28pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
lagmostkuit: |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by sarmiie(m): 8:35pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
Pork sword ??......hehehehehe |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by PunterTim(m): 8:52pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
BlaqCoffee109:Having Sex Close To Pain Is The Real Deal They Don't Know... Are We Quarelling? |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by jonaifame22(m): 9:34pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
rubbish! Big dickk I believe gives a gal a bittersweet experience which is a taste of both worlds, big dickk stays ur gal wth u even if u're dead broke! |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 10:46pm On Oct 29, 2015 |
PunterTim:quarrelling? u good? |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by tsdarkside(m): 7:32am On Oct 30, 2015 |
Durentt: 8 inch is normal for a black-man..... |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 7:33am On Oct 30, 2015 |
tsdarkside:didnt u see flaccid at d back of the 8inches do u even know d meaning of flaccid *faints again* 2 Likes |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by tsdarkside(m): 7:44am On Oct 30, 2015 |
Durentt: no,i dont know...what is flaccid |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by donjon: 7:47am On Oct 30, 2015 |
kewe, bring water make I splash dis boy!
e don faint. |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by Nobody: 7:48am On Oct 30, 2015 |
tsdarkside:mehn, ask gooogle |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by rejoicebae(f): 7:49am On Oct 30, 2015 |
Hmmmmm |
Re: 10 Reasons To Never Date A Man With A Big Penis by tsdarkside(m): 7:52am On Oct 30, 2015 |
Durentt: okay,,,you mean elephant-trunk....hahahahaha...the thing is,you can use it as a belt too....hahahaha... but dem this wan cum,no be small...... |
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