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101 Things That Does Not Make You A Christian by Congruent(m): 8:01pm On Nov 01, 2015 |
‘’You can’t box God up in religion. You can’t box Jesus up in Christianity. You can’t box church up in a building. You can’t box faith up in a set of beliefs. You can’t box grace up in conditions. The Kingdom of God isn’t boxed up in our churches’’. - Pastor Bruce H. Joffe Lets face it, the word Christian has become a clay word. It means different things to different people, whether professors (i.e. those of us who claim to be or identify ourselves as Christians) or non-professors (i.e. non-Christians). In attempting to define a Christian, let’s start by indicating who a Christian is not. The following things, behaviours or deeds do not constitute anyone a Christian. Here goes; 1) Having a Christian name 2) Changing your given/traditional/native name to a Christian one 3) Being born by Christian parents 4) Being born in a church hospital 5) Attending a Christian school (primary/secondary/tertiary) 6) Being named by a Pastor or Minister or dedicated in a church 7) Having a Christian Godfather or Godmother Being baptized or christened as an infant 9) Believing in God 10) Believing in Jesus 11) Believing in the existence of the devil, angels and/or demons 12) Believing in the Bible 13) Believing in the 10 commandments 14) Believing in the Sermon on the Mount or the Golden Rule 15) Believing in the supernatural and in miracles, signs and wonders 16) Believing in bible doctrines 17) Believing in heaven and hell or in life after death 18) Believing in prayer and fasting 19) Believing in the rapture and/or the 2nd coming of Jesus 20) Believing in the great tribulation, the anti-Christ and the mark of the Beast 21) Seeing visions 22) Seeing and/or talking to angels and/or spirits (including ArchAngel Gabriel, or Michael or Uriel??) 23) Dreaming and/or interpreting dreams (even if they come true) 24) Visiting Jerusalem 25) Visiting heaven and/or hell (and coming back to share the story) 26) ‘Seeing’Jesus or any of the Apostles of the Early Church 27) Paying tithes and offering 28) Giving to the poor and widows, orphans and the homeless 29) Giving to men of God 30) Giving special or sacrificial seeds (i.e. ‘gbemu’ offerings) 31) Building a church or camp ground or participating in building one (whether singlehandedly or with others, with cash or in kind) 32) Going to church 33) Going to a prayer/holy mountain 34) Going to a church camp ground/meeting 35) Going for a crusade 36) Going for deliverance 37) Going to Bible School/College 38) Attending Bible Study 39) Attending Sunday School 40) Attending prayer meetings 41) Attending night vigils 42) Attending anointing/breakthrough services 43) Reading the Bible 44) Memorising and/or reciting the Bible (in whole or part) 45) Praying (all kinds of manners of praying, whether daytime or at night) 46) Fasting (all kinds and manners of fasting) 47) Speaking in tongues 48) Speaking Christian language (Bless you, God is good, Praise the Lord etc) 49) Speaking positively, positive confessions, naming and claiming things (even when it works) 50) Using a particular tone of (gentle/Christian) voice 51) Dressing a particular way (whether as church practice or ‘bible’doctrine) 52) Wearing bishopial, pastoral or priestly clothes, collars, caps or rings 53) Wearing a cross (silver, golden, ceramic or wooden) 54) Having a cross or any religious image or relic on your person or around you (at home or office etc) 55) Receiving healing or deliverance 56) Receiving a breakthrough 57) Receiving a word of prophesy 58) Receiving and/or using anointed things (like handkerchiefs, stickers, calendars, frames etc) 59) Performing signs and wonders (calling down/stopping rainfall, walking on water etc) 60) Performing healings and miracles (including raising the dead) 61) Prophesying and/or telling the past, present or future (of people or events) 62) Casting out demons 63) Preaching or teaching in church 64) Evangelising or soul wining 65) Plating or starting a church 66) Being a church choir 67) Being a minister in any respect, senior or associate (irrespective of title) 68) Being a Pastor’s husband or wife 69) Being an elder or deacon 70) Being a Sunday school teacher 71) Being a children worker/teacher 72) Being laid hands on 73) Being anointed with any liquid (oil or water, even if from Jerusalem or River Jordan respectively) 74) Drinking anointing oil 75) Drinking holy water 76) Shaking or Falling under the anointing 77) Dancing or Singing or Screaming under the anointing 78) Sleeping under the anointing 79) Manifesting (in many different and sundry ways) under the anointing 80) Bathing with holy water from anywhere 81) Bathing in a holy river or spring 82) Participating in church meetings and programmes 83) Participating in water baptism (in all its forms) 84) Participating in Holy Communion/The Lord’s Supper 85) Participating in washing of feet (as a ‘biblical ordinance’) 86) Singing praise and worship or only Christian songs 87) Dancing to only Christian music 88) Sleeping with the Holy Bible under your pillow 89) Listening to sermons or Christian/motivational messages 90) Listening to Christian or motivational tapes 91) Reading Christian or motivational books 92) Being a non-smoker, non-drinker (or is it non-drunk?) or non wo(man)iser. 93) Being a monogamous man/woman 94) Being materially rich 95) Being materially poor 96) Being courteous or ‘humble’(bending/bowing down to greet others etc) 97) Being called or addressed as a Christian 98) Being called or addressed as a Pastor or Bishop or Prophet or Apostle or Evangelist etc 99) Being a good boy or girl, man or woman (i.e. expressing ethics in its best forms and morality in its most endearing manifestations) I know. I know. I said 101. But there’s nothing magical about the number. Its just a means of emphasising half of one point and creating engagement. I know you get it now. I did not say you agree. So you can drop your double barrel or atomic bomb, verbal and otherwise. But I believe you get my point (or my one half point, the first half to be precise). You can now own this list to infinity as you add other things you think does not make one a Christian. Keep the list growing………… |
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