I have been married for about 5 years now. Intercourse has really being work for me. All oga says is remind me of amount of yams and bride prize he brought whenever he wants to get down atlast we get down.

He doesn't even kiss and romance anymore he just goes straight to the point. When he is eventually done he gets up and hits to the bathroom. I really don't know what is going on

Please advise no curses

u shud talk to him..don't juz be quiet..discuss with him what u really feel that u r not contented or u r not happy the way he treated u on bed...we women shud demand to our man that we want climax and not juz open our legs for them to hit up straight. We not a mannequin or a blown-up dolls for good sex sake..

Sorry ma But you are just like one of his properties and you should stop acting like one

Lol. Sorry

.

Ok. It happens like that once in a while. Op answer these questions 1st

-has it been a while u had it b4 he started this?

-do you give an impression or facial/body language that you don't want or u're too tired for sex?

-does he feel tired or occupied these days?

Your answer will shed more light to the issue and yield better advice

Lol at d bride price n yam stuff

Op you shld be active in bed n nt lying down n raising/opening ur legs like roasted chicken. Do to him what u expect frm him, every sex can't b proceeded by pre-intimacy sometimes a quickie is done for a change.

If you don't feel comfortable with the way he initiates s.ex, don't have s.ex with him. It is so simple.

Talk to him, he is ur husband, he should understand

sexydiva21:
I have been married for about 5 years now. Intercourse has really being work for me. All oga says is remind me of amount of yams and bride prize he brought whenever he wants to get down atlast we get down.

He doesn't even kiss and romance anymore he just goes straight to the point. When he is eventually done he gets up and hits to the bathroom. I really don't know what is going on

Please advise no curses

I think he is not interested in what you want or it could be that you are the cause.

Hmmm!!!! Five years is enough to build a solid communication.

The key point I got from your statement was "when he is eventually done"

Meaning he does all the work everything while you relax and makes him satisfy you and read your mind on how the pleasure should be.

The last time I checked, There are gender equality this days even in the bedroom. initiate how you want him to do it some times or maybe you go on top and do the bouncing yourself. Do not relax now haba!!!!!!

some women just relax and expect their husband to be the breadwinner at home at the same time satisfy them 100% In Bed. "Papa John will pay rent, water bill, school fees, Electricity bill and must come to bed and satisfy me while I just relax with my legs spread only....."

This is 21st century Biko!!!!!!!

sexydiva21:
I have been married for about 5 years now. Intercourse has really being work for me. All oga says is remind me of amount of yams and bride prize he brought whenever he wants to get down atlast we get down.

He doesn't even kiss and romance anymore he just goes straight to the point. When he is eventually done he gets up and hits to the bathroom. I really don't know what is going on

Please advise no curses

but you chose the moniker sexydiva.

OP, your marriage has been like this for 5 year? Was he like this before you married him? As your husband, he should want to please you, and take his time doing it. As his wife, you should want to please him too. Marriage is a two-way street. Him saying, "remind me of amount of yams and bride prize he brought" is quite insensitive of him, which makes me think that he knows what he is doing/his action is intentional. Do not blame yourself and ignore Amtheone's comment that "you are the cause". He is a grown-man, you're not responsible for his actions, or lack thereof.

-Is he faithful? His lack of sexual desire for you might be because there's someone else/other people he's seeing.
-Is he's addicted to porn and masturbation? These could be affecting him, as they're his sources of pleasure.
-Does he have any medical condition? Aging men = low testosterone = low sex drive. Time for trip to the Doctor together?
-Do you argue a lot in your marriage? Are you emotionally-connected to each other?
(The presence of the former and lack of the latter can definitely cause a man to lose interest).
-Perhaps, you just need to switch things up and find different ways to please each other. Communicate your needs.

As it is now, you just have to take charge of the situation.

I suspect he really doesn't know better. So we have to show him

You start by being romantic. Kiss him when he least expects it, hug him spontaneously. Dress(decent nightwear, perfume etc etc) nicely in bed. When he wants to get down, don't let him penetrate. Tell him to wait, then massage him, kiss and do all the romantic things you can

You can also feed him well and when he's sated, express yourself to him... You can say something like *baba bisi, i'd be able to pleasure you more if you go gently with me. Massage me a bit and suck my titties etc etc *
It'll probably be awkward at first but you'll be fine don't worry

What is wrong with me this moreeen

sexydiva21:
I have been married for about 5 years now. Intercourse has really being work for me. All oga says is remind me of amount of yams and bride prize he brought whenever he wants to get down atlast we get down.

He doesn't even kiss and romance anymore he just goes straight to the point. When he is eventually done he gets up and hits to the bathroom. I really don't know what is going on

Please advise no curses

Ma'am,
Did your physique change recently
Do you guys have a quarrel
Does he have a mistress
Do you try to spice up the sex
What is the age gap between both of you

You can PM me your answer for further counselling

sexydiva21:
I have been married for about 5 years now. Intercourse has really being work for me. All oga says is remind me of amount of yams and bride prize he brought whenever he wants to get down atlast we get down.

He doesn't even kiss and romance anymore he just goes straight to the point. When he is eventually done he gets up and hits to the bathroom. I really don't know what is going on

Please advise no curses

Was your bride price too much?

Does your family members still burden him with a lot of expectations?

Did you try to ride him and see what he says?

So next time Op, give him a ride to pay off those yams.
Ride him, hit the top, tell him hey babes relax it's my turn.

raumdeuter:
Did you try to ride him and see what he says?

@OP its simple, he is not romantic, he is a learner, its as a result of a man patronizing prostitutes too much that it has affected him, he wont change again, he dnt romance, he wont romance, its left 4 u to to device other means to satisfy urself by meeting a young guy like me that is a master in pre-intimacy, i mean turning on.