Hmmmm....

the reason is not plausible

Mindfulness:
Is the decision not for your wife to make?

It's actually for both of you to make

okay.

Somebody put it dwn up there that d parents needs to reinforce what ave been tot d kids in sch ,what abt if d parents are illiterate ? I ave someone in this situation , all d parents does his getting a tutor. I agree wit d write up ,if a mum s working s good for d kids. Do u knw parent are also role model? Someone u cn emulate.

Quality and educative threads like this should not make front page till after about 3 pages. Was enjoying the thread but after a couple of good posts from onegal and the rest I started noticing silly comments like end time,referall links typical of front page topics.

very enlightening. Thanks to the mature contributors. You guys rock.

Well, all conditions are not the same. So the decision to stay at home or go to work is based on one's condition.

For example a single mom can't stay at home, no matter how much she wants to school her kids,

And a mother with a child not older than 5 should not be working later than 12pm (after school).

And some SAHMs are not exactly staying at home, instead they are in the neighbors house gossiping.

Either way, whether you are a SAHM or you are a working mother, always find time for your family, because however they spin it in research this days, you can never have spend too much time with your family and what kids learn from school gives them a degree or certificate, but what they learn from home gives them lessons of life.

And don't tell me kids learn to speak or interact from school, because you weren't in school
when you knew who "mama" is,
and what fire does,
and when to say good morning,

Redink4rums

Onegai:


errmm I am a watercolourist-pastel painter artist who has done an exhibition, play piano and violin. As well as had an undergraduate degree in Engineering and one of the best scores in Literature. With multiple hobbies such as hiking, skiing, adventuring, travel and at some point inwas able to pick up the basics of French, Japanese and Korean (I've lost them sha). Didn't learn any of that in school. All my best experiments were done at home.

I'm yet to seen a. school in Nigeria that matches their school fees millions being paid. Museums and observatories are free to explore, please what textbook will catch up, which teacher (half of them here are teaching because of unemployment, the other half are teaching because their husband's want them to have a job that closes on time).

(omo reading that description please of me, I sound awesome! Why did I even get married sef to Baby E's father, I should have sold myself to the highest bidder!!! )

Kids will pick up social skills.

Ma, I have the money to bid. Can you point me to a market where I can get someone with exactly your specs that is currently on sale? . You would get an agent fee of €1,000,000 for the effort. PM me if you are interested

@Onegai & Mindfulness, quite a brilliant conversation. Cracked me up though bt ws vry informative. Everyone with their opinions & school of thought of what works best for them. My singular take is, find out what works for you & make best productive use of it. But am not an advocate of SAHMs.

Mindfulness:


For how long do you want to train your kids at home?
With all due respect, I don't think you can give your kids more than a good school.

Big lie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm a mad advocate of SAHM. Child upbringing is a very important job and when possible should be given full attention. It is westernization that has brought this new ilk of ladies who see child upbringing and doing house chores as subjugation, when African families of old functioned properly and produced better humans with such templates. The man has his duties and the woman hers and none is any less important if the house is to be fictional. If my job even permits, I don't mind being a SAHD.

Theflint1:
Ma, I have the money to bid. Can you point me to a market where I can get someone with exactly your specs that is currently on sale? . You would get an agent fee of €1,000,000 for the effort. PM me if you are interested

The problem is that, if you met a girl with those specs, she probably won't act like a typical Nigerian girl: she may not kneel down to greet your mum, dish your every meal, she may want to speak her mind and have a say in the marriage. She won't attend mid-week fellowship and throw herself at a pastor's feet. She won't read Linda Ikeji but want to watch CNN with you. She may tell you she's still learning how to pound yam, will you manage that her draw soup is a work-in-progress (but it will improve because cooking decently is actually not hard), she may expect compliments and "thank yous" when she clears your plate after meals. She may be heartbroken the day you tell her "this is MY house, so shut up and obey me" because she thought you understood her contribution as a SAHM was equal to your paychecks.

Are you willing to sacrifice some Naija traits for some other things?

it can't only be in America not here in Nigeria

it can only be in America not here in Nigeria

am i the on not getting this ?. if you are a stay at home at home it does mean you shuld school your child at home. it ony means you will have more time for your children . i dont know what you guys are talikn about

@Mindfulness

You see, I do agree greatly with Onegai's view, that I do. Parental nurture does go a long way in turning kids into egg heads like her- at least it did work for me too. In my case, I'm not sure my mum really sat us down to teach us stuff (I'm the last born so, if she did, this latecomer missed it ). However, she was a teacher by profession (trained at a College of Education as an English teacher) and her knowledge of English rubbed off on all of us. We were just reading her books up and down- Shakespeare, Dele Fagunwa etc. In the case of my busy Dad, he was (and still is) an avid reader and bought a lot of book for us. That great knowledge of English and steady habit of reading made us ALL to venture into reading everything and anything we could lay our hands on.

The result? I became a doyen of English from an early age, so much so that the elders in my church call me "Professor" till today. I became very confident in myself and by Primary 4 had lost all fear of speaking publicly. Indeed, my English teacher back then too was dumbfounded at my skills. As early as JSS2, I was already reading my senior siblings' Chemistry and Physics books for fun. Unlike Onegai, I did have a highly successful Primary and Secondary edu. But like her, the only snag was in the university, where I decided to focus on understanding the courses taught (instead of cramming and passing) and got a 2.2 for my choice.

Great schools too do have their place. I had great teachers in the Federal Government College I attended. But the foundation my parents consciously and unconsciously laid for me was priceless, and I'm forever grateful to them for it.

P.S: Sorry for the epistle
P.P.S: I am a science student ooo!

tuscani:
am i the on not getting this ?. if you are a stay at home at home it does mean you shuld school your child at home. it ony means you will have more time for your children . i dont know what you guys are talikn about

think she means that you get to achieve a lot more being a SAHM and possibly school your kids too in a more advanced way than public schools. and become creative if you have rooms to explore your imaginations as regards to your career.

Onegai:




The problem is that, if you met a girl with those specs, she probably won't act like a typical Nigerian girl: she may not kneel down to greet your mum, dish your every meal, she may want to speak her mind and have a say in the marriage. She won't attend mid-week fellowship and throw herself at a pastor's feet. She won't read Linda Ikeji but want to watch CNN with you. She may tell you she's still learning how to pound yam, will you manage that her draw soup is a work-in-progress (but it will improve because cooking decently is actually not hard), she may expect compliments and "thank yous" when she clears your plate after meals. She may be heartbroken the day you tell her "this is MY house, so shut up and obey me" because she thought you understood her contribution as a SAHM was equal to your paychecks.

Are you willing to sacrifice some Naija traits for some other things?

I can cope with all but the first. Its kinda awkward though, cooking but not dishing. Don't you think so?

The "thank you" from my lips after she clears the plates would be perfunctory . I don't mind clearing my plates.

dake40:
So you think an average Nigerian father of 5 with the salary income of 40K below will happily award his wife a Stay at home certificate?......

A Nigerian Father with 5 kids and a salary of N40, 000 doesn't need a Stay at Home wife... HE NEEDS CLASSES IN FAMILY PLANNING

shiorrr. Be digging the grave of poverty and looking for who to blame when you end up in it.

Onegai:


A Nigerian Father with 5 kids and a salary of N40, 000 doesn't need a Stay at Home wife... HE NEEDS CLASSES IN FAMILY PLANNING

shiorrr. Be digging the grave of poverty and looking for who to blame when you end up in it.

So you would love to be a sit at home wife ern?.... No rational and optimistic woman will buy this idea.

enigmatique:
@Mindfulness

You see, I do agree greatly with Onegai's view, that I do. Parental nurture does go a long way in turning kids into egg heads like her- at least it did work for me too. In my case, I'm not sure my mum really sat us down to teach us stuff (I'm the last born so, if she did, this latecomer missed it ). However, she was a teacher by profession (trained at a College of Education as an English teacher) and her knowledge of English rubbed off on all of us. We were just reading her books up and down- Shakespeare, Dele Fagunwa etc. In the case of my busy Dad, he was (and still is) an avid reader and bought a lot of book for us. That great knowledge of English and steady habit of reading made us ALL to venture into reading everything and anything we could lay our hands on.

The result? I became a doyen of English from an early age, so much so that the elders in my church call me "Professor" till today. I became very confident in myself and by Primary 4 had lost all fear of speaking publicly. Indeed, my English teacher back then too was dumbfounded at my skills. As early as JSS2, I was already reading my senior siblings' Chemistry and Physics books for fun. Unlike Onegai, I did have a highly successful Primary and Secondary edu. But like her, the only snag was in the university, where I decided to focus on understanding the courses taught (instead of cramming and passing) and got a 2.2 for my choice.

Great schools too do have their place. I had great teachers in the Federal Government College I attended. But the foundation my parents consciously and unconsciously laid for me was priceless, and I'm forever grateful to them for it.

P.S: Sorry for the epistle
P.P.S: I am a science student ooo!

@enigmatique

Thanks for the mention. This is a nice write-up and I can partly find little Mindfulness inside of the story.
My father had a room full of books in the house and would take me to libraries every week to get more books. My mother taught me how to read and write before I was enrolled in primary school. My parents were both running a business and I never visited a nursery but spend most of the time with my grandparents while they were working. My parents were educated so they taught me as much as they could and passed much of their knowledge onto me. We discussed history and politics at the dining table and me and my siblings would do very well at school and university.

I am well aware of the fact that children profit immensely from the education their own parents received if the parents can make out some time to teach their children but the same children also do well at school because these parents can offer more support with school work. I don't think anyone disputes the benefits of caring and well-educated parents and I think everyone is aware of the fact that poorly educated parents can't give their children what teachers can.

I have done some research this morning on homeschooling because this thread awoke my curiosity, I might open a thread later in the evening when I come back.

Thanks for the contribution.

Harrycul:
@Onegai & Mindfulness, quite a brilliant conversation. Cracked me up though bt ws vry informative. Everyone with their opinions & school of thought of what works best for them. My singular take is, find out what works for you & make best productive use of it. But am not an advocate of SAHMs.

I will open another thread later that is related to this one but slightly different. I hope to see you there.

Mindfulness:


For how long do you want to train your kids at home?
With all due respect, I don't think you can give your kids more than a good school.

Education teaches you to know the basis of education home training won't teach you the basis of education but better things than education will.....respect, to love and to care, to be courteous of your self na home training and not school.....

axiliborha:
Education teaches you to know the basis of education home training won't teach you the basis of education but better things than education will.....respect, to love and to care, to be courteous of your self na home training and not school.....

The school I went to taught me respect, courage and care. However, nobody is saying that parents shouldn't teach their children or that children should only learn in school.

Mindfulness:


The school I went to taught me respect, courage and care. However, nobody is saying that parents shouldn't teach their children or that children should only learn in school.

so why make it look like education is better than home training with your change of words

axiliborha:
so why make it look like education is better than home training with your change of words

Relax! It's Saturday.

My stance is as follows, children need both, proper home training and good schools.

daretodiffer, freecocoa, cococandy, MzMyColi, fem29, I would like to hear your input on this matter.