Pwhitelaw:
Mummy’s boy, you are now a man. Tomorrow
you will have a new mother, a new cook and a
new person to share all your secrets with. It will
no longer be me but her. Love your new mum
even more than you love me. Before you walk
into her arms forever, let me give you some
words to guide you.
There was a day I was arguing with your father.
We were screaming. Tempers were high. I was
angry and He was angry. Then I called him an
idiot! He was shocked. He looked at me asking
how dare I call him that. I immediately started
calling him idiot, fool, stupid, crazy. I called him
all sort of name. Guess what he did? He didn’t
raise his hands to hit me. He just walked away,
banging the door as he went out.
My Son, If your father had hit me and destroyed
my eyes, how will you feel sitting here with me
today? How will you regard him as your father?
Would you have been proud of him or would you
be blaming me for calling him names? Never hit
your wife! No matter the provocation just walk
away and things will be normal. Whenever she
offends you, think of this story I just told you, it
could have been your mum!
Before I forget, after he left, I was filled with
guilt. We slept on same bed that night and I
went to him the next day. I pleaded with him, I
did all I could to show am sorry and he forgave
me. That day I cooked his favourite food, yes
you know he loves Affang soup right? After that
day, I never called him names, my respect for
him was ten times stronger.
There is something very important you must
always do, my son listen very carefully, defend
your wife. When she is under pressure, stand by
her. If your friends hates her, it is your duty to
make them see her as a Queen. Your Uncle, I
mean Uncle Udeme never liked me. But your
father was always supportive until his perception
changed.
There was a day your Father was going to host
the owner of his company and friends. They
were three of them. That day I was in the
kitchen cooking for them and your father went
to buy drinks. When the table was set and food
was served. Everyone started eating. Then I
remembered I did not add salt in the food. I was
embarrassed. Your father tasted the food and
looked at me. He immediately turned to the
guests. He told them that he instructed his wife
last month not to add salt whenever she is
cooking because of some problem with his body.
He said it in a funny way and everyone laughed!
The guests understood and he asked me to
bring salt and everyone added according to their
taste. He managed to eat the food without salt.
After the guest left, he went on his knees and
asked God to forgive him for lying.
Your wife is like a baby, sometimes she don’t
know what to say or do. Stand up and speak for
her!
Now let me talk to you about sex. You see sex
is a wonderful thing. Do not be surprised if your
wife enjoy and need sex more than you do.
There were days, I needed sex more than your
father and there were days he needed it more
than me but the important thing is to always try
to satisfy the other when they need you. Don’t
always think of your self.
There was a time things were hard and I needed
to do two jobs to support your father. One
night I was so tired. When I got to bed he was in
the mood. He try to make love to me and I
didn’t refuse him. I was tired but I felt I needed
to be there when he need me. When he tried
undressing me, he saw my look and he stopped.
He asked what was wrong and I said nothing. But
he understand me better. He stopped and then
started telling me stories until I fell asleep.
My son, Sex is best enjoyed when the two
parties are physically and mentally ready for it.
Sometimes, read your wife and understand her.
Make it a habit to go anywhere with your wife.
Beside your job, move around with her. If
anyone invite you to his house and told you not
to come with your wife then be very careful. Use
wisdom.
I know you love mummy… I know you tell me all
your problems. But now things will be different.
Let your wife be the first to know before me.
Let her be the first to see before me.
When you have problems with her don’t run to
me immediately. Wait for a day to pass and then
talk to her about it. Pray about it.
Finally, don’t forget to come and visit me
with your wife every month!
I know you will have a happy home. You will
always be mummy’s boy.