Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,197,771 members, 7,965,905 topics. Date: Friday, 04 October 2024 at 02:17 AM |
Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / Christmas For Warri (532 Views)
(1) (Reply)
Christmas For Warri by Achievement: 8:31pm On Dec 30, 2015 |
So it's at times like these i miss the AREA where i grew up.
Yes i was one of those kids who were kindda sheltered, but
i still lived in a YARD and grew up in an AREA. The kindda
Area where you heard nocturnal screams of "Dennis,
Dennis, this tiff tiff when you dey tiff so, God go punish you
o !", and your Daddy and the other men in the yard, went out
into the night muttering "This Dennis wahala don start
again", but you couldn't reconcile the wahala Dennis who
tiffed, with the fine broda who bought you Nikko sweet
whenever you went to visit his neighbour. The kind of area
where sometime after Dennis dies, you ask his big brother
Frank while he gives you a hair cut "Why Broda Dennis like
to dey tiff sef ?" and he says "Nor mind am, u hear ? Nor dey
tiff o", but sends you home with an embarrassing Bololo
that earns you knocks later in school.
See, our yard was my nuclear family and Area quite an
extended family. Thus i had a lot of Brodas and Sistas,
many so fond of me that even to this day, they still
recognize me and greet me. Regardless of the fact that my
name is "Prisca" to them, though i see no resemblance
between me and the girl who grew up next door. Still, so it
was and shall ever be, world without end.
That area was the sort where everyone realised that the
reason i always went buying boiled eggs as a kid, was
because my parents were a little bit, itsy bitsy, teeny weeny,
slightly, well to do, but the reason i was chewing gum was
because i stole some of my mother's money. And right they
were. Nor be small flog that day. It was the sort of area
where the same Aunty Onyi, who gave the kids in her yard
money to go buy fried fish, took you home and reported your
longa throat for buying fried fish, and Broda Chikwe the
hulky mechanic caught you mid flight, dragged you back
home and held you still for you mother's "yansh paralyzing
wrath". Yes, everyone had your wellbeing at heart. Well,
maybe not everyone. Like the woman whose kpuff kpuff
your mother warned you not to eat. Let's face it, there were
winshes in you area and your mother probably knew them
too.
Before y'all who use "hard knock life" as an anthem start
making mouth, i did watch films at my neighbour's window,
play Kala, Skiskiskilolo, Game boss and all em other games,
hide inside that spoilt car and do pressin down with that
girl, and run around the street rolling tyres and wheels.
Okay, i didn't do tyres and wheels, but i did have a custard
lid nailed to a stick. You get the point. The fact that i don't
have your scars and and sun burns is only because my
parents were hard working, while i feared and respected
them. Ain't nothing to be ashamed of. If e pain you well
well, go chop monkey sugar cane with lime. Should help
you smile better.
Now Christmas at my Area, was a seriously fun affair.
Everyone planned for themselves and for everyone else.
Yup, even if dem nor cook for ya house, don't worry, Area
got your back. The Christmas spirit literally announced
itself, when the kids went out with drums reminding all
"TODAY NA WETIN ? TODAY NA WATCHING NIGHT !
TOMMOROW NA WETIN ? TOMORROW NA CHRISTMAS !"
And surely this was indeed watching night, when the chin
chins and peanuts and buns were fried. Watching night
when frying pans testified to the holocaust of our winged
bipedal friends. This was watching night when, yards went
to war with other yards, renting the air with "BANGAD". Nah,
i didn't partake in these wars back then. What ? Someone
has to watch the fried chicken na. Okay, no i stayed home
crying. It would take many more years for me to light my
first "BANGAD".
No one knew when watching night became Christmas, cos
one sorta glided into the other. Christmas, meant i got to
wear brand new clothes and shoes and lead the other kids
on the compulsory visits. Christmas was when you went to
one broda's house, wished him HAPPY CHRISTMAS, sat and
stood up in the space of two minutes(dat is if you nor like
chop rice),and told him, "Broda we dey go o" without
moving an inch. Trust me, we nor dey go anywhere until
broda dropped something. We had unshakeable faith like
that.
That was Christmas for us. The fights on how to share the
money equally, when you know that broda handed four five
nairas to you specifically, and no matter what your mother
told you, it was bigger than one fifty naira note. Christmas,
the one time when all the winshes were friendly and you
never answered the call of "kpuff kpuff" no matter whose
house you ate in.
Then we moved from Area. Then we grew up. Then i knew
my church did not celebrate christmas. And i was a smart
ass. Christmas was stupid. It had no bearing whatsoever.
Grow up y'all ! Obtain sense ! Jesus wasn't born on
December 25th ! Father Christmas is too fat to fit in a
chimney ! We don't even have Chimneys down here ! And
gradually it went. Soon i was too smart to be a Christian.
Now what ?
I grew up and y'all grew up too ? Y'all finally obtained
sense ? So no kid wants to run around the street drumming
again ? Y'all became too poor to feed the entire street ?
Y'all butcher chicken according to the number of persons in
your house ? Y'all finally found better things to do with
money than waste it on Bangad wars ? Is this the price we
pay for maturity ? A bleak, boring routine life ? Is this the
price we pay for knowledge ? Pride over Joy ? Take away
my knowledge ! Take away my age ! Let's all be kids
again ! Innocent and stupid ! Somebody bring back
Christmas ! |
(1) (Reply)
Must Read For Nairalands / Lessons From Myth / Poetry Play #16
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 21 |