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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? (5474 Views)
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Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by Treetop20(m): 1:34am On Jun 20, 2009 |
Fhemmmy:sorry to disappoint you but you not always be loved and appreciated all your bad and annoying behaviors will have to be tolerated. no one wants to "love" and "cherish" you when you are being a pain in the ass. you want her to be able to tolerate! |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by ireke(m): 6:46am On Jun 20, 2009 |
We often misuse that valuable irreplaceable time called courtship. Courtship is not a time to know how good our spouse will be in bed. Don't just focus on the times when you asked and (s)he gave or yielded to your requests. Focus more on how (s)he deals with her/his siblings, how (s)he treats the waiter at the restaurant, the conductor/stranger in the bus and even her/his subordinates, colleagues and boss at work. If (s)he shows respect to them, (s)he will repsect you. If (s)he treats them with comtempt, it will be your turn one day when the love tan goes off your skin. How does (s)he behave when (s)he is angry? Take good note because it will be your turn one day. How does (s)he relate with people that you know that (s)he knows that you know that (s)he can't stand i.e. people (s)he hates? He will have a tendency to treat you like that in her/his down moments. Take good hints when he comments on movies or news items. Relax and study him well enough to know his philosophy about life. Of course, shit does happen, but when it does, there is a kind of confidence that comes when you know that you have done your due diligence. |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by emiemi(f): 9:03am On Jun 20, 2009 |
Hmmm, Choices we make huh |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by anddrewz: 11:23am On Jun 20, 2009 |
Marriage is a life time affair, and life is an ungoing thing. human beings undergo changes. "life will be absolutely meaningless if there were no room for changes". But what is important is the direction of the change, is it for possitive or negative?. If a woman marries a man that was smoking before the marriage, and after wards decides to stop smoking, that ofcourse is towards possitive. But if she marries a man that wasn't a drunk b4, but changes to become one, that is negative. The woman also undergoes some changes, most of the time the changes are meant to make both of them blend well. There are some characters that will not be reveal in a man except he passes through fire (pressure, hardship, difficulties etc). That is also applicable in a woman. Ones real character is known when he passes through "fire". Maybe during the courtship some issues that will manifest during marriage did not come up, the woman may not know the mans reaction to such issues. It is therefore advisable to strive to know each other as much as u can during the courtship, but also expect some reactions which might not manifest during courtship period, then make some adjustments towards a lasting marriage. The truth is there is no perfect marriage, but you can make yours as comfortable as u want, by simple adjustment, understanding, patience, and tolerance. |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by Hotchyk(f): 1:35pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
A succesful marriage is 10% pre and 90% post, ie what you do during courtship and after the wedding. most partners show love to each other when they are still dating, only to grow cold to each other after the ceremony.Women,you need to see your husband as your son whose excesses you will condone, no matter how gross. Men,the Bible says that 'hell has no fury as a woman scorned'. Learn to respect and love your wife. |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by cayesworld(m): 5:27pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
Hotchyk: Actually, I believe it should be the other way round (90% pre, 10% post). What are you doing getting married with only a 10% understanding of your spouse? @chaicover I feel your responses the most on this thread. Makes a whole lotta sense |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by tinuade001(f): 9:13pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
Don't just focus on the times when you asked and (s)he gave or yielded to your requests. Focus more on how (s)he deals with her/his siblings, how (s)he treats the waiter at the restaurant, the conductor/stranger in the bus and even her/his subordinates, colleagues and boss at work. If (s)he shows respect to them, (s)he will repsect you. If (s)he treats them with comtempt, it will be your turn one day when the love tan goes off your skin. How does (s)he behave when (s)he is angry? Take good note because it will be your turn one day. How does (s)he relate with people that you know that (s)he knows that you know that (s)he can't stand i.e. people (s)he hates? He will have a tendency to treat you like that in her/his down moments. Take good hints when he comments on movies or news items. Relax and study him well enough to know his philosophy about life. good talk. this is a very good and kind word. |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by na2day2(m): 9:54pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
chaircover: 90% ! na jazz? max, u will learn and know him 70% u have the rest of ur life learning and trying to figure out the remaining ever evolving 30% and usually the 30% is bigger and larger than the 70% u think u know |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by rubi(f): 11:12pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
You can if you are very deligent during courtship. Love is blind marriage is an eye opener |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by na2day2(m): 11:24pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
rubi: dont believe that period, i have way too many examples to show u |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by rubi(f): 11:27pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
na2day?:What I meanis forget about excitement and fantacy during courtship eg going to buffet etc just concentrate on the persons personality/intergrity that will help in marriage |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by manmustwac(m): 11:30pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
Na woa am planning to marry my babe towards the end of this year. And although she's a nice person i hardly spent time with her so i can't say i really know her that well. |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by na2day2(m): 11:55pm On Jun 20, 2009 |
rubi: oh no u didn't! if a guy does that next thing u know the girls will open thread on NL about how stingy or broke azz the guy is |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by rubi(f): 12:42am On Jun 21, 2009 |
na2day?: Marriage is not meant for boys and girls |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by na2day2(m): 1:06am On Jun 21, 2009 |
rubi: ah! i got u, i will let the rest of NL girls know that |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by Allta(m): 9:26am On Jun 21, 2009 |
rubi: I concur, I see it as a game of luck (or if you're religious, a game of blessing); whichever way, no one can really predict the outcome of it. It's definately not meant for boys and girls, it's a game for men and women. However, the more time spent together (under the same roof) during courtship, will teach how to understand and bear with love with the other half. The only thing is that, in our culture, people aren't "normally suppose" to live together for long before marriage/engagement. But in most part of the west, it's an intricate aspect of life where a boy and girl move in together and then spend quality years to understand each other before taking it to another level of committment - marriage. Once done, there is no looking back. Moreover, the only way out is divorce, and funny enough, that's very rampant in the west than south. |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by ehisianya(m): 12:37pm On Jun 21, 2009 |
In My opinion, don't try to understand him at all, JUST LOVE HIM A good relationship is like a a good health, u will not know the value until u are ill. and a successful MARIAGE is the One B/W a blind wife & a deaf Husband. |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by messiah(m): 1:52pm On Jun 21, 2009 |
Courtship is a period of deception where each partner puts up a facade in order to impress the other thereby masking the true fact that they're just humans. |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by Bawss1(m): 10:49am On Jun 22, 2009 |
messiah: lol Hotchyk: That was Shakespeare not the Bible |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by netotse(m): 11:03am On Jun 22, 2009 |
ireke: this is on point!. . . |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by rubi(f): 6:39pm On Jun 22, 2009 |
messiah:I agree. Friendship is better than courtship that makes one vulnerable to each other |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by Theblessed(f): 11:52am On Jun 23, 2009 |
[b] Quite inappropriate question? How about this? How can a Man Understand his Wife After the Wedding? This is how it should be, ok! It's all too well to put pressure on women in marriage on how to understand their husbands/inlaws (African culture). What about men? What's wrong in them understanding their wives after the wedding, too? It seems to me that this question applies to those off the shelf marriages - where BOY met GIRL in the street and got her married the next day without proper courtship thus, not knowing or understanding each other very well before jumping in with their HEADS. Modern marriages that worth it's GOLD do not operate this way at all. To start with, you've got to date each other for months if not years before plunging in, and there is no need in doing that HARD work after the wedding because it had already been done. To that question I say it goes both ways, ok! So, stop piling pressure on women to behave in fact, it's men that need that behaving not women because we understand our positions and roles. Trouble starts when men ego gets the better of them and their controlling and abusing behaviours suddenly emerge that some of us would not condone, that's when katakata don come in the marriage and thus,the woman is labeled 'A BAD WIFE'.[/b] |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by popegirl(f): 11:55am On Jun 23, 2009 |
just be prayerful |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by bestvera: 1:50am On Jun 24, 2009 |
endurance na d last bstop 4 marriage since d , line has being signed. though with patience and tolerance u can learn to understanding ur husband but e go take time |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by bestvera: 2:09am On Jun 24, 2009 |
In My opinion, don't try to understand him at all, JUST LOVE HIM A good relationship is like a a good health, u will not know the value until u are ill. and a successful MARIAGE is the One B/W a blind wife & a deaf Husband. na curse if d wife blind d hubby deaf d marriage is dead because without understanding, it is like a soldier going to war without weapon |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by bestvera: 2:30am On Jun 24, 2009 |
out of desperation some ladies no go wan hear, I DO, I DO b4 u know wetin dey happen water don pass garri |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by cystein(m): 7:07pm On Jun 26, 2009 |
A husband is just like a boyfriend the only thing is you cant part easy. I am one so i know what it takes. Keep ur wife well dear man! |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by Busta(f): 7:09pm On Jun 26, 2009 |
cystein: true but then again, people tend to change alot after marriage. they become someone else. . . Most cases, MONSTERS! |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by kelexworld(f): 8:16pm On Jun 26, 2009 |
But what really causes this changes both in the MEN and WOMEN after their vows? |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by cystein(m): 9:28pm On Jun 26, 2009 |
The rule is simple. Limit resources to your wife to avoid her despising others and men too don't chase little flowers out there. Ask your wife for whatever new tricks you want and instead splash out what you would spend on concubines on her. It balances the equation.!! |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by Nobody: 10:18pm On Jun 26, 2009 |
kelexworld: If you figure it out, i'll be the first to buy your book |
Re: How Can A Woman Understand Her Husband After Wedding? by kelexworld(f): 11:35pm On Jun 26, 2009 |
If you figure it out, i'll be the first to buy your book Grin hahaha. its that complicated. |
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